The Like Switch: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Influencing, Attracting, and Winning People Over


Jack Schafer - 2015
    As a Special Agent for the FBI’s National Security Division’s Behavioral Analysis Program, Dr. Jack Schafer developed dynamic and breakthrough strategies for profiling terrorists and detecting deception. Now, Dr. Schafer has evolved his proven-on-the-battlefield tactics for the day-to-day, but no less critical battle of getting people to like you. In The Like Switch, he presents these techniques for how you can influence, attract, and win people over. Learn how to think and react like your favorite TV investigators from Criminal Minds or CSI as Dr. Schafer shows you how to improve your LQ (Likeability Quotient), “spot the lie” both in person and online, master nonverbal cues that influence how people perceive you, and turn up or turn down the intensity of a relationship. Dr. Schafer cracks the code on making great first impressions, building lasting relationships, and understanding others’ behavior to learn what they really think about you. With tips and techniques that hold the key to taking control of your communications, interactions, and relationships, The Like Switch shows you how to read others and get people to like you for a moment or a lifetime.

How to Communicate with Confidence


Mike Bechtle - 2013
    How to Communicate with Confidence is a straightforward guide to making good conversation that works in any situation--and works for any personality type. Highlighting the art of give and take and stressing the importance of listening, this book gives confidence to those who hesitate to strike up a conversation. Author Mike Bechtle shows readers that they don't have to have a stockpile of great stories to tell in order to make good conversation. Instead, he encourages an "explorer" mind-set and gives readers the tools they need to talk to anyone, anytime, anywhere.

Human Lie Detection and Body Language 101: Your Guide to Reading People's Nonverbal Behavior


Vanessa Van Edwards - 2013
    In a ten minute conversation you are likely to be lied to two to three times. Learn how to spot those lies. You will learn: *How to read body language *How to be a human lie detector *How to read people *How to detect hidden emotions *How to spot lies This body language book is based on scientifically backed research on the how to read people's nonverbal behavior. Who Is This Book For? Whether you are a business owner, parent, spouse, employee, human resources director, teacher or student, this book will change the way you interact with those around you. Here are all of the people that can benefit from this book on body language: Employers Public speakers Doctors Human Resources Directors Poker Players Actors Students Employees Parents Teachers Entrepreneurs You! If you have ever interacted with another person, this book will be useful to you because our everyday interactions are filled with secret nonverbal cues just waiting to be uncovered. Because this book is based in real science, it will debunk some popular myths about lying. Lying Myth #1: If people look to the left, they are lying. If they look to the right they are telling the truth. Although there is some science about eye direction, which we talk about in the book. It is not the most reliable form of lie detection. The book will show you more accurate (and easier) ways to spot lies. Lying Myth #2: Liars can't look you in the eyes. On average, honest people will make eye contact during conversations about 60% of the time-way less than you thought, right? Liars actually look you in the eye more because they want to seei f you believe their lie or not. Lying Myth #3: Emails and IM's are filled with lies because it is easier to lie when people can't see or hear you. In the book, I will tell you which of the following have the most lies: ___Emails ___IM's ___Phone conversations ___Face to Face interactions I'll give you a hint: Shockingly, we lie the MOST in phone conversations and the LEAST in emails. Why Is Lie Detection Important? It is important when we know we are being lied to because it can save us money, time and sometimes even our safety. This book can train you to get to the truth 80% to 90% of the time. That can save you money on a faulty house, from hiring a bad employee or making sure you know what is really going on with your child or significant other. Unfortunately, we are not good at detecting lies. We are only right about 54% of the time! That is a little better than a coin toss. We tend to assume the best in people and have a bias towards truth-"innocent until proven guilty." In Human Lie Detection and Body Language 101 I give a number of real life examples and tons of practical tips that you will be able to use immediately. For example, wouldn't it have been great to have known when Lance Armstrong was lying? Lance Armstrong Lies In his recent Oprah interview, Lance Armstrong's body language was off the charts with lies and inconsistencies. He constantly made the "contempt" microexpression, which you will learn about in the book and showed how he really felt about the interview. He also showed a dominant and aggressive body posture and seating position. His words said far less than in his body. You can learn how to decode these popular culture segments on TV and in real life. If you find this case fascinating and wish you could begin to unravel the mysteries of body language, then get your copy of Human Lie Detection and Body Language 101 now!

How to Work a Room: The Ultimate Guide to Making Lasting Connections--In Person and Online


Susan RoAne - 1989
    How to Work a Room, 25th Anniversary Edition by Susan RoAne has descriptive copy which is not yet available from the Publisher.

Winning with People


John C. Maxwell - 2005
    Some people are born with great relationship skills, but those who are not can learn to improve them. In Winning with People Maxwell has translated decades of experience into 25 People Principles that anyone can learn. Maxwell has divided the People Principles in this book according to the questions we must ask ourselves if we want to win with people: Readiness: Are we prepared for relationships? Connection: Are we willing to focus on others? Trust: Can we build mutual trust? Investment: Are we willing to invest in others? Synergy: Can we create a win-win relationship? Each section contains guiding People Principles. Some are intuitive, such as The Lens Principle: Who We Are Determines How We See Others. Others may go against your instincts, such as The Confrontation Principle: Caring for People Should Precede Confronting People. All of them are 100 percent practical!

Radical Honesty : How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth


Brad Blanton - 1994
    It was a shocker! In it, Dr. Brad Blanton, a psychotherapist and expert on stress management, explored the myths, superstitions and lies by which we all live. And this newly revised edition is even worse! Blanton shows us how stress comes not from the environment, but from the self-built jail of the mind. What keeps us in our self-built jails is lying."We all lie like hell," Dr. Blanton says. "It wears us out...it is the major source of all human stress. It kills us." Not telling our friends, lovers, spouses, or bosses about what we do, feel, or think keeps us locked in that mind jail. The way out is to get good at telling the truth, and Dr. Blanton provides the tools we can use to escape from that jail of the mind. This book is the cake with the file in it.In Radical Honesty, Dr. Blanton coaches us on how to have lives that work, how to have relationships that are alive and passionate, and how to create intimacy where none exists. As we have been taught by the philosophical and spiritual sources of our culture for thousands of years, from Plato to Nietzsche, from the Bible to Emerson, the truth shall set you free.

The 11 Laws of Likability: Relationship Networking . . . Because People Do Business with People They Like


Michelle Tillis Lederman - 2011
    In 11 Laws of Likability, she presents activities, self-assessment quizzes, and real-life anecdotes from professional and social settings to show readers how to identify what's likable in themselves and use those characteristics to build connections with other professionals. The worst thing anyone can do when trying to establish a personal bond with someone is to come across as manipulative or self-serving. That’s why Michelle focuses on the power of authentic connections, which go much deeper and feel much easier than trying to hit self-imposed business card collection quotas. This book presents a new paradigm that shows even the most networking-averse how to network well--and maybe even enjoy the process.You’ll discover how to start conversations and keep them going with ease; convert acquaintances into friends; uncover people's preferences; tweak your personal style to enable engaging, reciprocal interactions; and leave a lasting impression on others after your initial meeting.We all know that networking is important, and that forming relationships with others is a vital part of success. But traditional forms of networking often remove emotions from the equation--focusing only on immediate goals. This book teaches readers how to build the kind of deep relationships that have true staying power, bring genuine joy, and provide long-term support.

How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends: Revised and Updated


Don Gabor - 1983
    This revised and updated edition offers easy time-tested ways to improve anybody's ability to communicate in business and social situations, either in person or in cyberspace.

Bringing Out the Best in People: How to Enjoy Helping Others Excel


Alan Loy McGinnis - 1985
    There are actually a small number of principles used by good motivators, and the best leaders were using them long before psychology had a name. Fascinating case studies and anecdotes about Lee Iacocca, Sandra Day O'Connor, and many others show how you can put 12 key principles to work in your family or organization. Whether you are a parent, executive, teacher, or friend, you can gain the satisfaction that comes from Bringing the Best Out in People.

How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less


Nicholas Boothman - 1999
    Now that connection is infinitely easier to make through Nicholas Boothman's program of rapport by design.How to Make People Like You in 90 Seconds or Less is the work of a master of Neuro-Linguistic Programming whose career is teaching corporations and groups the secrets of successful face-to-face communication. Aimed at establishing rapport-that stage between meeting and communicating-How to Make People Like You focuses on the concept of synchrony. It shows how to synchronize attitude, synchronize body language, and synchronize voice tone so that you instantly and imperceptibly become someone the other person likes. Reinforcing these easy-to-learn skills is knowing how to read the other person's sensory preferences-most of us are visual, some are kinesthetic, and a minority are auditory. So when you say "I see what you mean" to a visual person, you're really speaking his language. Along the way the book covers attitude, nervousness, words that open a conversation and words that shut it down, compliments, eye cues, the magic of opposites attracting, and more. It's how to make the best of the most important 90 seconds in any relationship, business or personal.

The Dance of Connection: How to Talk to Someone When You're Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed, or Desperate


Harriet Lerner - 2001
    Harriet Lerner teaches us how to restore love and connection with the people who matter the most. In The Dance of Connection we learn what to say (and not say) when:- We need an apology, and the person who has harmed us won't apologize or be accountable.- We don't know how to take a conversation to the next level when we feel desperate.- We feel worn down by the other person's criticism, negativity, or irresponsible behavior.- We have been rejected or cut off, and the other person won't show up for the conversation.- We are struggling with staying or leaving, and we don't know our "bottom line."- We are convinced that we've tried everything -- and nothing changes.Filled with compelling personal stories and case examples, Lerner outlines bold new "voice lessons" that show us how to speak with honor and personal integrity, even when the other person behaves badly.Whether we're dealing with a partner, parent, sister, or best friend, The Dance of Connection teaches us how to navigate our most important relationships with clarity, courage, and joyous conviction.

Making Sense of People: Decoding the Mysteries of Personality


Samuel H. Barondes - 2011
    "Making Sense of People" provides the scientific frameworks and tools we need to improve our intuition, and assess people more consciously, systematically, and effectively. Leading neuroscientist Samuel H. Barondes explains the research behind each standard personality category: extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, neuroticism, and openness. He shows readers how to use these traits and assessments to do a better job of deciding who they'll enjoy spending time with, whom to trust, and whom to keep at a distance. Barondes explains: What neuroscience and psychological research can tell us about how personality types develop and cohere.The intertwined roles of genes, nurture, and education in personality development.How to recognize troublesome personality patterns such as narcissism, sociopathy, and paranoia.How much a child's behavior predicts their adult personality, and how personality stabilizes in young adulthood.How to assess integrity, fairness, wisdom, and other traits related to morality.What genetic testing may (or may not) teach us about personality in the future.General strategies for getting along with people, with specific tactics for special circumstances. Kirkus Reviews A succinct look at personality psychology. As a psychiatrist and neuroscientist at the University of California, Barondes ("Molecules and Mental Illness," 2007, etc.) has spent years studying human behavior, and this book reflects his systematic, scientific approach for personality assessment. The average person isn't likely to have time to research a difficult boss or potential love interest, but the author supplements intuition with a useful cornerstone for gauging human behavior: a table of the "Big Five" personality traits, among them Extraversion vs. Introversion and Agreeableness vs. Antagonism. To learn how to apply the Big Five, Barondes supplies a link for a professional online personality test, in addition to a basic introduction of troubling personality patterns e.g., narcissism and compulsiveness. While genetics may play a heavy hand in influencing personality, Barondes writes, it's awareness of a person's background, character and life story that is paramount in unearthing reasons for adult behavior. Readers might like to see the author weave more everyday examples into the text his exercise in fostering compassion by imagining an adult as a 10-year-old child is a gem but there is plenty here to ponder. Those looking for traditional "self-help" advice won't find it here, but this book clearly lays the groundwork for deeper human interaction and better life relationships."

Belong: Find Your People, Create Community, and Live a More Connected Life


Radha Agrawal - 2018
    Where are our people? The answer is found in Belong , a highly energetic and beautifully illustrated guide to discovering where and with whom you fit.             After suffering her own bout of community confusion, Agrawal embarked on a journey that ultimately resulted in cofounding Daybreaker, a transformative phenomenon where thousands of people get up at the crack of dawn, meet in event spaces in 22 cities around the world, and dance. Now she’s distilled her experience for finding meaningful connections into a two-step process. The first step is GOING IN.  This includes determining what we want in a friend and community and what we offer, becoming intentional about our relationships, gauging the type of energy we emit and respond to, and understanding how we do—or don’t—show up for others. Then comes GOING OUT—how to find a few special friends who feed our soul; or how to find a fully engaged group with similar business, artistic, and social aims; or both.             Connectedness is the most significant factor in human happiness— Belong is a creative blueprint for bringing this most important dimension back into our lives.

The Definitive Book of Body Language


Allan Pease - 2004
    Yet most of us don’t know how to read body language–and don’t realize how our own physical movements speak to others. Now the world’s foremost experts on the subject share their techniques for reading body language signals to achieve success in every area of life.Drawing upon more than thirty years in the field, as well as cutting-edge research from evolutionary biology, psychology, and medical technologies that demonstrate what happens in the brain, the authors examine each component of body language and give you the basic vocabulary to read attitudes and emotions through behavior. Discover:• How palms and handshakes are used to gain control• The most common gestures of liars• How the legs reveal what the mind wants to do• The most common male and female courtship gestures and signals• The secret signals of cigarettes, glasses, and makeup• The magic of smiles–including smiling advice for women• How to use nonverbal cues and signals to communicate more effectively and get the reactions you wantFilled with fascinating insights, humorous observations, and simple strategies that you can apply to any situation, this intriguing book will enrich your communication with and understanding of others–as well as yourself.

How the World Sees You: Discover Your Highest Value Through the Science of Fascination


Sally Hogshead - 2014
    It all begins with understanding how the world sees you—at your best. How the World Sees You gives you the step-by-step method to describe yourself in just two or three words. This short phrase is your Anthem, the tagline for your personality. Your Anthem guides you like a mission statement, helping you to build your team, write a LinkedIn profile, or captivate an audience.This book includes a private code to unlock one free Fascination Advantage® online assessment. Your customized online report, based on Sally Hogshead's extensive research on what fascinates listeners, will reveal how you fascinate others, includingYour top two Fascination Advantages in communication The personality Archetypes you need on your team to optimize your success The five words to describe your personality's highest valueTo become more successful, you do not have to change who you are—you have to become more of who you are. How the World Sees You reveals who you are at your best so you can create better relationships, grow your business, and become intensely valuable to those who matter most.