You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters


Kate Murphy - 2020
    So do our politicians.We're not listening.And no one is listening to us.Despite living in a world where technology allows constant digital communication and opportunities to connect, it seems no one is really listening or even knows how. And it’s making us lonelier, more isolated, and less tolerant than ever before. A listener by trade, New York Times contributor Kate Murphy wanted to know how we got here.In this always illuminating and often humorous deep dive, Murphy explains why we’re not listening, what it’s doing to us, and how we can reverse the trend. She makes accessible the psychology, neuroscience, and sociology of listening while also introducing us to some of the best listeners out there (including a CIA agent, focus group moderator, bartender, radio producer, and top furniture salesman). It’s time to stop talking and start listening.

The Art of Gathering: How We Meet and Why It Matters


Priya Parker - 2018
    If we can understand what makes these gatherings effective and memorable, then we can reframe and redirect them to benefit everyone, host and guest alike. Parker defines a gathering as three or more people who come together for a specific purpose. When we understand why we gather, she says -- to acknowledge, to learn, to challenge, to change -- we learn how to organize gatherings that are relevant and memorable: from an effective business meeting to a thought-provoking conference; from a joyful wedding to a unifying family dinner. Drawing on her experience as a strategic facilitator who's worked with such organizations as the World Economic Forum, the Museum of Modern Art, and the retail company Fresh, Parker explains how ordinary people can create remarkable occasions, large and small. In dozens of fascinating examples, she breaks down the alchemy of these experiences to show what goes into the good ones and demonstrates how we can learn to incorporate those elements into all of our gatherings. The result is a book that's both journey and guide, full of big ideas with real-world applications that will change the way you look at a business meeting, a parent-teacher conference, and a backyard barbecue.

The Power of the Other: The startling effect other people have on you, from the boardroom to the bedroom and beyond-and what to do about it


Henry Cloud - 2016
    These are necessary, but not sufficient. Using evidence from from neuroscience and his work with leaders, Dr. Cloud shows that the best performers draw on another vital resource: personal and professional relationships that fuel growth and help them surpass current limits. Popular wisdom suggests that we should not allow others to have power over us, but the reality is that they do, for better or for worse. Consider the boss who diminishes you through cutting remarks versus one who challenges you to get better. Or the colleague who always seeks the limelight versus the one who gives you the confidence to finish a difficult project. Or the spouse who is honest and supportive versus the one who resents your success. No matter how talented, intelligent, or experienced, the greatest leaders share one commonality: the power of the others in their lives. Combining engaging case studies, persuasive findings from cutting-edge brain research, and examples from his consulting practice, Cloud argues that whether you’re a Navy SEAL or a corporate executive, outstanding performance depends on having the right kind of connections to fuel personal growth and minimize toxic associations and their effects. Presenting a dynamic model of the impact these different kinds of connections produce, Cloud shows readers how to get more from themselves by drawing on the strength and expertise of others. You don’t have a choice whether or not others have power in your life, but you can choose what kinds of relationships you want.

The Five Dysfunctions of a Team: A Leadership Fable


Patrick Lencioni - 2002
    This time, he turns his keen intellect and storytelling power to the fascinating, complex world of teams. Kathryn Petersen, Decision Tech's CEO, faces the ultimate leadership crisis: Uniting a team in such disarray that it threatens to bring down the entire company. Will she succeed? Will she be fired? Will the company fail? Lencioni's utterly gripping tale serves as a timeless reminder that leadership requires as much courage as it does insight. Throughout the story, Lencioni reveals the five dysfunctions which go to the very heart of why teams even the best ones-often struggle. He outlines a powerful model and actionable steps that can be used to overcome these common hurdles and build a cohesive, effective team. Just as with his other books, Lencioni has written a compelling fable with a powerful yet deceptively simple message for all those who strive to be exceptional team leaders.

Perfect Phrases for Dealing with Difficult People: Hundreds of Ready-To-Use Phrases for Handling Conflict, Confrontations and Challenging Personalities


Susan Benjamin - 2007
    With Perfect Phrases books, you have all the phrases you need to get things done, right at your fingertips!

The Fearless Organization: Creating Psychological Safety in the Workplace for Learning, Innovation, and Growth


Amy C. Edmondson - 2018
    With so much riding on innovation, creativity, and spark, it is essential to attract and retain quality talent--but what good does this talent do if no one is able to speak their mind? The traditional culture of "fitting in" and "going along" spells doom in the knowledge economy. Success requires a continuous influx of new ideas, new challenges, and critical thought, and the interpersonal climate must not suppress, silence, ridicule or intimidate. Not every idea is good, and yes there are stupid questions, and yes dissent can slow things down, but talking through these things is an essential part of the creative process. People must be allowed to voice half-finished thoughts, ask questions from left field, and brainstorm out loud; it creates a culture in which a minor flub or momentary lapse is no big deal, and where actual mistakes are owned and corrected, and where the next left-field idea could be the next big thing.This book explores this culture of psychological safety, and provides a blueprint for bringing it to life. The road is sometimes bumpy, but succinct and informative scenario-based explanations provide a clear path forward to constant learning and healthy innovation.* Explore the link between psychological safety and high performance * Create a culture where it's "safe" to express ideas, ask questions, and admit mistakes * Nurture the level of engagement and candor required in today's knowledge economy* Follow a step-by-step framework for establishing psychological safety in your team or organization Shed the "yes-men" approach and step into real performance. Fertilize creativity, clarify goals, achieve accountability, redefine leadership, and much more. The Fearless Organization helps you bring about this most critical transformation.

The Science of Social Intelligence: 33 Studies to Win Friends, Be Magnetic, Make An Impression, and Use People’s Subconscious Triggers


Patrick King - 2017
    This is your blueprint for social success. Humans are unpredictable… or are we? Through decades of research, Scientists have shown consistent patterns in human behavior and thought that can lead you us to very predictable outcomes. In other words, there are genuine ways to forge better relationships that take advantage of human psychology and behavioral patterns. Learn the elements of magnetic charisma. In The Science of Social Intelligence , you'll have over 30 studies, new and old, broken down in a way that answers the question, “How can I use this science in my everyday life?” Rely on findings from psychology, cognitive science, and behavioral economics, rather than one person’s anecdotal advice of what works. Learn why conventional “small talk” advice is flat-out wrong. This book is a truly in-depth look at the concept of being socially intelligent, maximizing the social opportunities you are given, and leveraging your unique strengths to have the relationships you want. In a time where most advice takes the form of “make more eye contact” and “smile more,” this book stands out. Learn how to make a powerful first impression. The Science of Social Intelligence pairs the raw human behavioral data and findings with the insight and emotional intelligence of Patrick King, sought-after social skills coach and internationally bestselling author. The result is half textbook, half field guide for whatever your social goals may be. Understand what makes people tick (even if they don’t). - What popularity in high school really requires. - The true psychology of being positive. - The two way street of perception and how it impacts your relationships. Be likable without appearing manipulative. - The three things everyone wants to talk about (as well as what to always avoid). - How to be emotionally calibrated and attuned to people. - The toxic habits you need to break for social success. Social intelligence unlocks everything you want in life. It gives you the ability to walk into a room and feel (1) at ease, (2) excited, and (3) walk out accomplishing exactly what you want. This could be romantic, career-related, or just with friends - social intelligence allows you to excel in any situation. The likability you create is what will move you forward in life. Social intelligence is the invisible hand that boosts people and gives them opportunities, not just luck or being ridiculously good looking. Embody social intelligence. Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page.

Dealing with People You Can't Stand: How to Bring Out the Best in People at Their Worst


Rick Brinkman - 1994
    Rick Brinkman and Rick Kirschner armed a civility-starved world with no-nonsense strategies for dealing with difficult people with tact and skill. Since then, cell phones, the Internet, voice mail, and other technological wonders designed to bring people closer together have only made it that much harder to avoid "people you can't stand;" even worse, they've also created exciting new ways for annoying people to realize their talent for being pains in the butt.Updated and revised for the digital age, this new edition of Brinkman and Kirschner's bestselling guide shows readers how to successfully combat the whiners, grenades, tanks, snipers, close-talkers, pedants, and other rude, crude, and inconsiderate people who can ruin your day at work, in stores, on the street, in restaurants, at the movies, in waiting rooms, by fax, phone, and E-mail, and in cyberspace.

The Silent Marriage: How Passive Aggression Steals Your Happiness; The Complete Guide to Passive Aggression Book 5


Nora Femenia - 2012
    This behavior is particularly hard on women subject to the silent treatment, cold shoulder, or other ways of emotional withholding from their partner. It causes women to develop a progressive feeling of isolation, of being left emotionally dry and bereft precisely in the most intimate of relationship. Whatever the degree of emotional detachment they experience, the impact in their self-esteem is very profound and long lasting.In this new, revised edition this book actually describes the frustration of your emotional needs caused by the silent marriage, followed by mental confusion, imprecise guilt feelings, the impression of walking on eggshells to avoid being rejected, together with extreme loneliness and constant sadness to no end. This is an important book because builds on cold shoulder as the main toxic behavior, going to describe the whole passive aggressive marriage and its impact on your self-esteem and well being. Even when you don’t consider his withholding of connection a kind of abuse in marriage, the fact that spouses are emotionally dependent on each other for love and support makes you chronically starved for his love and attention. You can even wonder if this is his way to control your happiness in life? In this case, resentment creeps in and destroys any remaining trust.Once you can identify these emotional states, you can go on learning strategies and alternatives to counter his passive aggression communication style, without resorting to violence, begging or other tricks. It will also gives you a map that could actually help your partner to see through his behavior and understand what is he doing to sabotage the marriage.Overall this expanded and revised 2015 edition is full of practical tips and strategies to protect yourself and motivate you to be happier with or without him. It will help you to move your relationship from the current stand still to a place where you can enjoy a better experience with more love and respect.

It's All Your Fault!: 12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything


Bill Eddy - 2008
    This is a growing problem?possibly effecting over 25 percent of the US population?and a predictable one that can be managed and keep everyday problems from becoming high conflict disputes.

The Culture Code: The Secrets of Highly Successful Groups


Daniel Coyle - 2017
    An essential book that unlocks the secrets of highly successful groups and provides readers with a toolkit for building a cohesive, innovative culture, from the New York Times bestselling author of The Talent Code

Curious: The Desire to Know and Why Your Future Depends On It


Ian Leslie - 2014
    But only some retain the habits of exploring, learning and discovering as they grow older. Which side of the ’curiosity divide’ are you on?In Curious Ian Leslie makes a passionate case for the cultivation of our desire to know. Curious people tend to be smarter, more creative and more successful. But at the very moment when the rewards of curiosity have never been higher, it is misunderstood and undervalued, and increasingly practised only by a cognitive elite.Filled with inspiring stories, case studies and practical advice, Curious will change the way you think about your own mental life, and that of those around you.

Thank You for Arguing: What Aristotle, Lincoln, and Homer Simpson Can Teach Us About the Art of Persuasion


Jay Heinrichs - 2007
     The time-tested secrets this book discloses include Cicero’s three-step strategy for moving an audience to action—as well as Honest Abe’s Shameless Trick of lowering an audience’s expectations by pretending to be unpolished. But it’s also replete with contemporary techniques such as politicians’ use of “code” language to appeal to specific groups and an eye-opening assortment of popular-culture dodges—including The Yoda Technique, The Belushi Paradigm, and The Eddie Haskell Ploy. Whether you’re an inveterate lover of language books or just want to win a lot more anger-free arguments on the page, at the podium, or over a beer, Thank You for Arguing is for you. Written by one of today’s most popular language mavens, it’s warm, witty, erudite, and truly enlightening. It not only teaches you how to recognize a paralipsis and a chiasmus when you hear them, but also how to wield such handy and persuasive weapons the next time you really, really want to get your own way.

Don't Think of an Elephant! Know Your Values and Frame the Debate: The Essential Guide for Progressives


George Lakoff - 2004
    He outlines in detail the traditional American values that progressives hold, but are often unable to articulate. Lakoff also breaks down the ways in which conservatives have framed the issues, and provides examples of how progressives can reframe them. Lakoff’s years of research and work with leading activists and policy makers have been distilled into this essential guide, which shows progressives how to think in terms of values instead of programs, and why people support policies which align with their values and identities, but which often run counter to their best interests. Don't Think of an Elephant! is the definitive handbook for understanding and communicating effectively about key issues in the 2004 election, and beyond. Read it, take action—and help take America back.

Setting Boundaries with Difficult People


David J. Lieberman - 2010
    David J. Lieberman, introduces a wonderful right-to-the-point book that shows readers how to put an end to boundary issues once and for all!A work colleague with whom you have only a casual relationship asks you to co-sign a loan for him . . . your neighbor asks you to keep her antisocial, flea-riddled cat for the weekend — again. We've all faced sticky situations like these — unreasonable demands on our time and inappropriate requests from family, friends, co-workers or casual acquaintances. We want to say No. We have the right to say No — always. And yet we don't. Maybe you tell yourself that you don’t want to make waves or ruffle feathers, or that it’s simply not worth it; but part of you simmers with anger and frustration that you didn’t speak up and do something— anything.Isn't it ironic how a two-year-old can bark a resounding and guilt-free NO! without batting an eye, yet we grown-ups often find ourselves saying Yes when we mean to say No? Or we say "Let me think about it . . .” and agonize for weeks over how to say, inevitably, No. We've all had our share of freeloaders, mooches, encroachers, interlopers, high-maintenance acquaintances — many of whom are repeat offenders. We've all had to deal with people who ask for favors that are inappropriate or unreasonable because they exceed the boundaries of our relationship with them. And we think, Why doesn't he realize he's crossing the line? The answer is: Because he doesn't know where the line is, or he doesn't care. The problem, as you're about to learn, is leaky boundaries. Some people have such permeable, poorly-defined boundaries that they have no concept of where they end and you begin. Some people will take No for an answer and that's the end of it. But some people don't. What do you do when the person on the other end of your No flat out refuses to accept your No?You'll discover exactly what to say as well as learn the underlying psychology that motivates them to always ask, and you to always give in!