Boys & Sex: Young Men on Hookups, Love, Porn, Consent, and Navigating the New Masculinity


Peggy Orenstein - 2020
    It also had an unexpected effect on its author: Orenstein realized that talking about girls is only half the conversation. Boys are subject to the same cultural forces as girls—steeped in the same distorted media images and binary stereotypes of female sexiness and toxic masculinity—which equally affect how they navigate sexual and emotional relationships. In Boys & Sex, Peggy Orenstein dives back into the lives of young people to once again give voice to the unspoken, revealing how young men understand and negotiate the new rules of physical and emotional intimacy.Drawing on comprehensive interviews with young men, psychologists, academics, and experts in the field, Boys & Sex dissects so-called locker room talk; how the word “hilarious” robs boys of empathy; pornography as the new sex education; boys’ understanding of hookup culture and consent; and their experience as both victims and perpetrators of sexual violence. By surfacing young men’s experience in all its complexity, Orenstein is able to unravel the hidden truths, hard lessons, and important realities of young male sexuality in today’s world. The result is a provocative and paradigm-shifting work that offers a much-needed vision of how boys can truly move forward as better men.

No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind


Daniel J. Siegel - 2014
    By doing so, the cycle of negative behavior (and punishment) is essentially brought to a halt, as problem solving becomes a win/win situation. Inside this sanity-saving guide you'll discover- strategies that help parents identify their own discipline philosophy--and master the best methods to communicate the lessons they are trying to impart - facts on child brain development--and what kind of discipline is most appropriate and constructive at all ages and stages - the way to calmly and lovingly connect with a child--no matter how extreme the behavior--while still setting clear and consistent limits - tips for navigating your child through a tantrum to achieve insight, empathy, and repair - twenty discipline mistakes even the best parents make--and how to stay focused on the principles of whole-brain parenting and discipline techniquesComplete with candid stories and playful illustrations that bring the authors' suggestions to life, No-Drama Discipline shows you how to work with your child's developing mind, peacefully resolve conflicts, and inspire happiness and strengthen resilience in everyone in the family.

Love Is the Killer App: How to Win Business and Influence Friends


Tim Sanders - 2002
    By that I mean: Your knowledge: everything that comes from all the books that I’ll encourage you to devour.Your network: the collection of friends and contacts you now have, which I’ll teach you how to grow and nurture.Your compassion: that human warmth you already possess—in these pages I’ll convince you that you can show it freely at the office.What happens when you do all this?* You become a rich source of information to all around you.* You are seen as a person with valuable insight.* You are perceived as generous to a fault, producing surprise and delight.* You double your business intelligence in one year.* You triple your network of personal relationships in two years.* You quadruple the number of colleagues in your life who love you like family.In short, you become one of those amazing, outstanding people to whom everyone turns, who leads rather than follows, who never runs out of ideas, contacts, or friendship.Here’s the real scoop: Nice guys don’t finish last. They rule!From the Hardcover edition.

The Confidence Gap


Russ Harris - 2010
    Whether it's public speaking, taking on a leadership role, or asking someone for a date, there are situations in which we just don't feel equipped to handle the challenges we face.Russ Harris offers a surprising solution to low self-confidence, shyness, and insecurity: rather than trying to "get over" our fears, he says, the secret is to form a new and wiser relationship with them. Paradoxically, it's only when we stop struggling against our fearfulness that we begin to find lasting freedom from it.Drawing on the techniques of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), a cutting-edge form of cognitive-behavioral therapy, The Confidence Gap explains how to� Free yourself from common misconceptions about what confidence is and how to build it� Transform your relationship with fear and anxiety� Clarify your core values and use them as your inspiration and motivation� Use mindfulness to effectively handle negative thoughts and feelings

The Manual: What Women Want and How to Give It to Them


W. Anton - 2010
    This is why guys that read it don't read or recommend anything else. Because the few men who "get it" spend the rest of their lives enjoying sexy girls in abundance - and so can you.You can learn to get ANY girl you want, the same way that all men who are naturally good with women have. The only difference is that you may learn it much FASTER, instead of wasting tons of time and money on fruitless dates or a new car/haircut/shirt that you BELIEVE will make you more attractive - but really doesn't.You see; men LACK success with women because they either don't understand what women are attracted to, or because they THINK that they do know, but have the wrong ideas and hence waste a lot of time - sometimes their entire life - chasing things they don't need. You know you have to get this book if you believe women want men with money, cars, or anything else that is manmade, because that doesn't make any sense. If women really were attracted to something unnatural, how did men meet women before any of those things were invented?The approach you'll learn in The Manual is very different from conventional dating and the advice you find in the mainstream media because it focuses on natural attraction - on what women REALLY want - not what they CLAIM they want or what males in general BELIEVE women want. It incorporate men's and women's socialization and explains phenomenas such as why men think women are attracted to things such as money (yet money is a man-made invention that has not even EXISTED very long) and why women "play hard to get" (a well-known phrase which amusingly reveals that women ARE easy but only pretend not to be).This is why the beginning of the book addresses your basic beliefs and mindset, because if you learn to THINK correctly, you will automatically behave correctly around women. Even if they are so stunning they normally take your breath away, your mind goes blank, and you run out of words.You already have what it takes to seduce women. Like, if you never run out of words around your close friends or family, you should be able to talk to a hot girl without making a fool out of yourself. The reason you seem to be a different person in such situations is because you ARE - you are NOT being yourself! You act differently because you were socialized to sabotage yourself. The Manual teaches you how to unlock your true potential and to bring out the real you - not change you into someone you are not.The method presented to get girls works on all women, no matter what language they speak, how young they are, or what type of relationship you might be looking for. It's universal because it's based on natural attraction, what all women are hardwired to respond to, and attraction is an emotion, not a decision.You can use it to get a sexy girlfriend, one night stands or even long-term relationships. You can use it to find true love, a soul mate, or just casual sex without commitment. And one of its best benefits is that it will make women want to be with you and appreciate you. The girls you get will REMAIN attractive even after you have formed a sexual relationship with them, because they are so happy to be with you. While most other guys who do get (average) girls, often find themselves with an average female who becomes even less attractive over time as she stops taking care of herself completely.All other dating books simply repeat conventional wisdom that doesn't work very well in reality, and even the best ones are about ACTING like an attractive man, not on how to BECOME one. But the problem is if you go around acting like someone besides yourself, even if you do start getting girls, it's not really YOU who are getting them. The Manual will show you how to get laid like a rock star, without being one, and without pretending to be one e

The Gratitude Diaries: How a Year Looking on the Bright Side Can Transform Your Life


Janice Kaplan - 2015
    Her pioneering reseach was praised in People and Vanity Fair and hailed on TV shows including Today, The O’Reilly Factor, and CBS’s The Talk. On New Year’s Eve, journalist and former Parade Editor-in-Chief Janice Kaplan makes a promise to be grateful and look on the bright side of whatever happens. She realizes that how she feels over the next months will have less to do with the events that occur than her own attitude and perspective. Getting advice at every turn from psychologists, academics, doctors, and philosophers, she brings readers on a smart and witty journey to discover the value of appreciating what you have. Relying on both amusing personal experiences and extensive research, Kaplan explores how gratitude can transform every aspect of life including marriage and friendship, money and ambition, and health and fitness. She learns how appreciating your spouse changes the neurons of your brain and why saying thanks helps CEOs succeed. Through extensive interviews with experts and lively conversations with real people including celebrities like Matt Damon, Daniel Craig, and Jerry Seinfeld, Kaplan discovers the role of gratitude in everything from our sense of fulfillment to our children’s happiness.   With warmth, humor, and appealing insight, Janice’s journey will empower readers to think positively and start living their own best year ever.

The Definitive Book of Body Language


Allan Pease - 2004
    Yet most of us don’t know how to read body language–and don’t realize how our own physical movements speak to others. Now the world’s foremost experts on the subject share their techniques for reading body language signals to achieve success in every area of life.Drawing upon more than thirty years in the field, as well as cutting-edge research from evolutionary biology, psychology, and medical technologies that demonstrate what happens in the brain, the authors examine each component of body language and give you the basic vocabulary to read attitudes and emotions through behavior. Discover:• How palms and handshakes are used to gain control• The most common gestures of liars• How the legs reveal what the mind wants to do• The most common male and female courtship gestures and signals• The secret signals of cigarettes, glasses, and makeup• The magic of smiles–including smiling advice for women• How to use nonverbal cues and signals to communicate more effectively and get the reactions you wantFilled with fascinating insights, humorous observations, and simple strategies that you can apply to any situation, this intriguing book will enrich your communication with and understanding of others–as well as yourself.

Beyond Anger: A Guide for Men: How to Free Yourself from the Grip of Anger and Get More Out of Life


Thomas J. Harbin - 1999
    Research shows men are often more violent and less willing to confront and deal with their emotions than women. Written by a psychologist who specializes in the treatment of male rage, Beyond Anger shows the angry - and miserable - man how to change his life and relationships for the better. This book helps men understand their anger by explaining what the specific symptoms of chronic anger are and by showing angry men how their actions negatively affect family, friends, and coworkers. It helps men control violent feelings by using simple exercises - developed especially for men - to identify when and why anger occurs and by helping them form new habits to prevent anger before it starts. Women, too, will learn essential strategies for understanding and helping the angry men in their lives. Beyond Anger is honest, tough, and real.

Everything That Remains: A Memoir by the Minimalists


Joshua Fields Millburn - 2013
    Until he didn't anymore. Blindsided by the loss of his mother and his marriage in the same month, Millburn started questioning every aspect of the life he had built for himself. Then, he accidentally discovered a lifestyle known as minimalism...and everything started to change. That was four years ago. Since, Millburn, now 32, has embraced simplicity. In the pursuit of looking for something more substantial than compulsory consumption and the broken American Dream, he jettisoned most of his material possessions, paid off loads of crippling debt, and walked away from his six-figure career. So, when everything was gone, what was left? Not a how-to book but a why-to book, Everything That Remains is the touching, surprising story of what happened when one young man decided to let go of everything and begin living more deliberately. Heartrending, uplifting, and deeply personal, this engrossing memoir is peppered with insightful (and often hilarious) interruptions by Ryan Nicodemus, Millburn's best friend of twenty years.

What French Women Know About Love, Sex and Other Matters of the Heart and Mind


Debra Ollivier - 1960
     I t's not the shoes, the scarves, or the lipstick that gives French women their allure. It's this: French women don?t give a damn. They don?t expect men to understand them. They don?t care about being liked or being like everyone else. They generally reject notions of packaged beauty. They accept the passage of time, celebrate the immediacy of pleasure, like to break rules, embrace ambiguity and imperfection, and prefer having a life to making a living. They are, in other words, completely unlike us. Ollivier goes beyond familiar ooh-la-la stereotypes about French women, challenging cherished notions about sex, love, dating, marriage, motherhood, raising children, body politics, seduction, and flirtation. Less a how-to and more a how-not-to, "What French Women Know" offers a refreshing counterpoint to the stale love dogma of our times. Peppered with anecdotes from its Franco-American author and filled with provocative ideas from French sexperts, mistresses and maidens alike, it debunks longstanding myths, presenting savvy new thinking from an old sexy culture and more realistic, life-affirming alternatives from the land that knows how to love.

The Path Between Us: An Enneagram Journey to Healthy Relationships


Suzanne Stabile - 2018
    And that can make relationships hard, whether with intimate partners, with friends, or in our professional lives. Understanding the motivations and dynamics of these different personality types can be the key that unlocks sometimes mystifying behavior in others—and in ourselves.This book from Suzanne Stabile on the nine Enneagram types and how they behave and experience relationships will guide readers into deeper insights about themselves, their types, and others' personalities so that they can have healthier, more life-giving relationships. No one is better equipped than Suzanne Stabile, coauthor, with Ian Morgan Cron, of The Road Back to You, to share the Enneagram's wisdom on how relationships work—or don’t.• Why do Sixes seem so intimidated and put off by Eights, who only wish the Sixes would stop mulling things over and take action?• Why do Fives seem so unavailable, even to their closest family and friends, while Twos seem to feel everybody else’s feelings but their own and end up irritating people who don’t want their help?• How in the world can Fours be so open and loving to you one day and restrained and distant other times?The Enneagram not only answers these questions but gives us a way out of our usual finger pointing and judging of other people—and finding them wanting, perplexing, or impossible. Suzanne's generous, sometimes humorous, and always insightful approach reveals why all the types behave as they do. This book offers help in fostering more loving, mature, and compassionate relationships with everyone in our lives.

When I Say No, I Feel Guilty: How to Cope - Using the Skills of Systematic Assertive Therapy


Manuel J. Smith - 1975
    The best-seller that helps you say: "I just said 'no' and I don't feel guilty!" Are you letting your kids get away with murder? Are you allowing your mother-in-law to impose her will on you? Are you embarrassed by praise or crushed by criticism? Are you having trouble coping with people? Learn the answers in "When I Say No, I Feel Guilty," the best-seller with revolutionary new techniques for getting your own way.

Not Caring What Other People Think Is a Super Power: Insights From A Heavyweight Boxer


Ed Latimore - 2017
    Most people worry about what others will think, so they suffocate their actions. As a result, they never live up to their potential. Within this book are insights about life and living to the fullest in 7 categories. You Will Learn: -The real reason the ability to work hard is so highly valued. -How to identify where to invest your emotional energy for the greatest return -Why you can't afford to have low standards for anything you do or the company you keep. -The greatest source of motivation that's untapped by most. -Vital paradigm and mindset shifts that will allow you to get more out of life. -The difference between strategy and tactics and how to develop a mindset for both. -How to select the best people to have a relationship with and get the most out of it.

The Honest Truth About Dishonesty: How We Lie to Everyone - Especially Ourselves


Dan Ariely - 2012
    From Washington to Wall Street, the classroom to the workplace, unethical behavior is everywhere. None of us is immune, whether it's the white lie to head off trouble or padding our expense reports. In The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty, award-winning, bestselling author Dan Ariely turns his unique insight and innovative research to the question of dishonesty.Generally, we assume that cheating, like most other decisions, is based on a rational cost-benefit analysis. But Ariely argues, and then demonstrates, that it's actually the irrational forces that we don't take into account that often determine whether we behave ethically or not. For every Enron or political bribe, there are countless puffed résumés, hidden commissions, and knockoff purses. In The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty, Ariely shows why some things are easier to lie about; how getting caught matters less than we think; and how business practices pave the way for unethical behavior, both intentionally and unintentionally. Ariely explores how unethical behavior works in the personal, professional, and political worlds, and how it affects all of us, even as we think of ourselves as having high moral standards.But all is not lost. Ariely also identifies what keeps us honest, pointing the way for achieving higher ethics in our everyday lives. With compelling personal and academic findings, The (Honest) Truth About Dishonesty will change the way we see ourselves, our actions, and others.

QBQ! The Question Behind the Question: Practicing Personal Accountability in Work and in Life


John G. Miller - 2004
    No organization—or individual—can successfully compete in the marketplace, achieve goals and objectives, provide outstanding service, engage in exceptional teamwork, or develop people without personal accountability.   John G. Miller believes that the troubles that plague organizations cannot be solved by pointing fingers and blaming others. Rather, the real solutions are found when each of us recognizes the power of personal accountability. In QBQ! The Question Behind the Question®, Miller explains how negative, ill-focused questions like “Why do we have to go through all this change?” and “Who dropped the ball?” represent a lack of personal accountability. Conversely, when we ask better questions—QBQs—such as “What can I do to contribute?” or “How can I help solve the problem?” our lives and our organizations are transformed.THE QBQ! PROMISEThis remarkable and timely book provides a practical method for putting personal accountability into daily actions, with astonishing results: problems are solved, internal barriers come down, service improves, teams thrive, and people adapt to change more quickly. QBQ! is an invaluable resource for anyone seeking to learn, grow, and change. Using this tool, each of us can add tremendous worth to our organizations and to our lives by eliminating blame, victim-thinking, and procrastination.                                                                                                 QBQ! was written more than a decade ago and has helped countless readers practice personal accountability at work and at home. This version features a new foreword, revisions and new material throughout, and a section of  FAQs that the author has received over the years.