Hunt, Gather, Parent: What Ancient Cultures Can Teach Us About the Lost Art of Raising Happy, Helpful Little Humans


Michaeleen Doucleff - 2021
    Michaeleen Doucleff becomes a mother, she examines the studies behind modern parenting guidance and finds the evidence frustratingly limited and the conclusions often ineffective. Curious to learn about more effective parenting approaches, she visits a Maya village in the Yucatán Peninsula. There she encounters moms and dads who parent in a totally different way than we do—and raise extraordinarily kind, generous, and helpful children without yelling, nagging, or issuing timeouts. What else, Doucleff wonders, are Western parents missing out on? In Hunt, Gather, Parent, Doucleff sets out with her three-year-old daughter in tow to learn and practice parenting strategies from families in three of the world’s most venerable communities: Maya families in Mexico, Inuit families above the Arctic Circle, and Hadzabe families in Tanzania. She sees that these cultures don’t have the same problems with children that Western parents do. Most strikingly, parents build a relationship with young children that is vastly different from the one many Western parents develop—it’s built on cooperation instead of control, trust instead of fear, and personalized needs instead of standardized development milestones. Maya parents are masters at raising cooperative children. Without resorting to bribes, threats, or chore charts, Maya parents rear loyal helpers by including kids in household tasks from the time they can walk. Inuit parents have developed a remarkably effective approach for teaching children emotional intelligence. When kids cry, hit, or act out, Inuit parents respond with a calm, gentle demeanor that teaches children how to settle themselves down and think before acting. Hadzabe parents are world experts on raising confident, self-driven kids with a simple tool that protects children from stress and anxiety, so common now among American kids. Not only does Doucleff live with families and observe their techniques firsthand, she also applies them with her own daughter, with striking results. She learns to discipline without yelling. She talks to psychologists, neuroscientists, anthropologists, and sociologists and explains how these strategies can impact children’s mental health and development. Filled with practical takeaways that parents can implement immediately, Hunt, Gather, Parent helps us rethink the ways we relate to our children, and reveals a universal parenting paradigm adapted for American families.

Baby Meets World: Suck, Smile, Touch, Toddle: A Journey Through Infancy


Nicholas Day - 2013
    They were not what he expected.Drawing on a wealth of perspectives—scientific, historical, cross-cultural, personal—Baby Meets World is organized around the mundane activities that dominate the life of an infant: sucking, smiling, touching, toddling. From these everyday activities, Day weaves together an account that is anything but ordinary: a fresh, surprising story, both weird and wondrous, about our first experience of the world.Part hidden history of parenthood, part secret lives of babies, Baby Meets World steps back from the moment-to-moment chaos of babydom. It allows readers to see infancy anew in all its strangeness and splendor.

iGen: Why Today’s Super-Connected Kids Are Growing Up Less Rebellious, More Tolerant, Less Happy--and Completely Unprepared for Adulthood--and What That Means for the Rest of Us


Jean M. Twenge - 2017
    Born in the mid-1990s to the mid-2000s and later, iGen is the first generation to spend their entire adolescence in the age of the smartphone. With social media and texting replacing other activities, iGen spends less time with their friends in person—perhaps why they are experiencing unprecedented levels of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. But technology is not the only thing that makes iGen distinct from every generation before them; they are also different in how they spend their time, how they behave, and in their attitudes toward religion, sexuality, and politics. They socialize in completely new ways, reject once sacred social taboos, and want different things from their lives and careers. More than previous generations, they are obsessed with safety, focused on tolerance, and have no patience for inequality. iGen is also growing up more slowly than previous generations: eighteen-year-olds look and act like fifteen-year-olds used to. As this new group of young people grows into adulthood, we all need to understand them: Friends and family need to look out for them; businesses must figure out how to recruit them and sell to them; colleges and universities must know how to educate and guide them. And members of iGen also need to understand themselves as they communicate with their elders and explain their views to their older peers. Because where iGen goes, so goes our nation—and the world.

Understanding the Borderline Mother


Christine Ann Lawson - 2000
    Recognizing her face, her voice, the meaning of her moods, and her facial expressions is crucial to survival. Dr. Christine Ann Lawson vividly describes how mothers who suffer from borderline personality disorder produce children who may flounder in life even as adults, futilely struggling to reach the safety of a parental harbor, unable to recognize that their borderline parent lacks a pier, or even a discernible shore. Four character profiles describe different symptom clusters that include the waif mother, the hermit mother, the queen mother, and the witch. Children of borderlines are at risk for developing this complex and devastating personality disorder themselves. Dr. Lawson's recommendations for prevention include empathic understanding of the borderline mother and early intervention with her children to ground them in reality and counteract the often dangerous effects of living with a "make-believe" mother. Some readers may recognize their mothers as well as themselves in this book. They will also find specific suggestions for creating healthier relationships. Addressing the adult children of borderlines and the therapists who work with them, Dr. Lawson shows how to care for the waif without rescuing her, to attend to the hermit without feeding her fear, to love the queen without becoming her subject, and to live with the witch without becoming her victim. A Jason Aronson Book

A Failure of Nerve: Leadership in the Age of the Quick Fix


Edwin H. Friedman - 2007
    He was the first to tell us that all organizations have personalities, like families, and to apply the insights of family therapy to churches and synagogues, rectors and rabbis, politicians and teachers.Failure of Nerve is essential reading for all leaders, be they parents or presidents, corporate executives or educators, religious superiors or coaches, healers or generals, managers or clergy. Friedman's insights about our regressed, seatbelt society, oriented toward safety rather than adventure, help explain the sabotage that leaders constantly face today.Suspicious of the quick fixes and instant solutions that sweep through our culture only to give way to the next fad, he argues for strength and self-differentiation as the marks of true leadership. His formula for success is more maturity, not more data; stamina, not technique; and personal responsibility, not empathy.This book was unfinished at the time of Friedman's death, and originally published in a limited edition. This new edition makes his life-changing insights and challenges available to a new generation of readers.

Yeah Dave's Guide to Livin' the Moment: Getting to Ecstasy Through Wine, Chocolate and Your iPod Playlist


David Romanelli - 2009
    What's not to love?David “Yeah Dave” Romanelli is kinda hip, kinda goofy, and occasionally really outrageous, an unlikely guru who is reinventing the quest for enlightenment. For Yeah Dave, the path to ecstasy doesn't require any previous experience with yoga, meditation, or wellness. He shows us how to find transcendence through everyday pleasures, like admiring the sunset or rocking out to your favorite band. “There is a place where the chocolate tastes sweeter, the music sounds better, the inspiration feels richer, and the visions look clearer,” writes Dave. “That place is the Moment.”Yeah Dave’s Guide to Livin’ the Moment offers an alternative to the crazy, over-stimulating, distracted world we live in today, a world in which we watch the news while eating, eye our email while conversing, and forget to notice the full moon while texting. On our mission for speed, movement, and stimulation, we risk missing our life. Yeah Dave’s book gives us our life back, one beautiful, delicious, and funny moment at a time.Yeah Dave’s Guide will make you laugh out loud while taking you someplace totally unexpected. Through hilarious vignettes about his dorky moves on the dance floor, his Crackberry addiction, and his tryst with Hot Horny Married Woman, he shares fresh and unforgettable wisdom. Without dogma or anything too “out there,” Dave makes you want to slow down the blur of modern life and find the full flavor, power, and passion that can only be found in the Moment.

Tough Guys and Drama Queens: How Not to Get Blindsided by Your Child's Teen Years


Mark Gregston - 2012
    Are you ready for your child's teen years?If you've ever lain awake at night wondering what might be around the corner of your child's adolescence, this book is for you! After more than thirty-eight years of working with more than 2,500 years, Mark Gregston, founder of heartlight, a Christian residential counseling center, introduces Tough Guys and Drama Queens — a must-read "how-to" book for parents of pre-teens and teens with time-tested, biblical techniques to guide you  through these unavoidably challenging years.Mark helps parents realize that some natural parenting approaches are actually counter-productive and therefore totally ineffective.In place of those, he offers tried and true wisdom on the vital importance of relationship, forgiveness, and explains how conflict is actually the precursor to change.Everyday your child is bombarded by highly sexualized culture and over-exposed to words and images that can influence them beyond your reach.your connection to them during these years is critical as is your response to tough issues such as appearance, performance, authority and respect, boundaries, and many more.

Wild Things: The Art of Nurturing Boys


Stephen James - 2009
    Wild Things addresses the physical, emotional, and spiritual parts of a boy, written by two therapists who are currently engaged in clinical work with boys and their parents and who are also fathers raising five sons. Contains chapters such as "Sit Still! Pay Attention!" "Deficits and Disappointments," and "Rituals, Ceremonies, and Rites of Passage."

Done With The Crying: Help and Healing for Mothers of Estranged Adult Children


Sheri McGregor - 2017
     As a loving mother to whom the unthinkable happened, McGregor knows the horrible shock that wrings a parent dry, triggers denial, blame, anger, and shame. With empathy and understanding, as well as tools, the latest research, and insight from more than 9,000 parents of estranged adult children, McGregor helps parents of estranged adults plan ahead, prepare for emotional triggers, and prevail over setbacks and pain. You can be happy again. In a calm yet authoritative voice, and with exercises derived from her work as a life coach and her own recovery, McGregor helps mothers who did their best to come to terms with their estranged adult child's choices, and regain their health and happiness. To fathers of estranged adult children—this book can help you, too. "Ninety-three percent of the parents who answer my survey at RejectedParents.Net are mothers," says Sheri McGregor. "That's why the title is directed at them. But many of the book's examples are from couples and highlight the experiences of fathers and their reactions. The principles presented are relevant to fathers, and the strategies for coping can be used by anyone." In this encouraging and comprehensive book, McGregor fully covers the phenomenon of estranged adult children from families who never expected a son or daughter to cut ties and walk away. Nine in-depth chapters provide dozens of inspiring examples from among the thousands of parents of estranged adult children. Gain understanding and practical help from a mother who knows the pain of this devastating loss with all its uncertainty and heartache. Hope can remain, but you don't have to stay stalled, forever waiting. You can move past the disbelief and distress. Take charge. Reclaim yourself and your life—only maybe even better. Recommendations: The book is a must read for parents of estranged adult children and mental health professionals working with these families. Sheri McGregor’s work is a breath of fresh air offering a new perspective and providing support, encouragement, resources, and compassion to good parents who have found themselves in an unimaginable situation. ---Maritza Parks, LMHC, Inspired Journeys Counseling While Mothers are mentioned on the cover, dads, this is for you too! Done with the Crying is for any (and all) family member who wants to heal and move forward. This wonderful book will help you see how you can hold your chin up high, dry your eyes, and get on with your life. ---Joi Sigers, Self Help Dailly.com Done With the Crying also provides much time for reflection, for taking time to think about ones life and to read the stories of other women who are going through a similar situation. The book is easy to read, and provides much support and insight in a gentle and understanding way. ---Hennie Weiss, M.A., Metapsychology Online Reviews This is my best resource to assist families whose adult children have rejected them. In my role as a family life educator, I work with those affected by a loved one’s mental illness, and the sad phenomenon of estrangement is rampant. I’ve searched for resources and education, but there is precious little available to help rejected parents move forward. It did not take me many pages in to see the value for my work, and I often recommend this compassionately written book to parents and families who are in so much pain. ---Mara J. Briere, MA CFLE, President and Founder, Grow a Strong Family, Inc.

Flourish: A Visionary New Understanding of Happiness and Well-Being


Martin E.P. Seligman - 2011
    Traditionally, the goal of psychology has been to relieve human suffering, but the goal of the Positive Psychology movement, which Dr. Seligman has led for fifteen years, is different—it’s about actually raising the bar for the human condition. Flourish builds on Dr. Seligman’s game-changing work on optimism, motivation, and character to show how to get the most out of life, unveiling an electrifying new theory of what makes a good life—for individuals, for communities, and for nations. In a fascinating evolution of thought and practice, Flourish refines what Positive Psychology is all about. While certainly a part of well-being, happiness alone doesn’t give life meaning. Seligman now asks, What is it that enables you to cultivate your talents, to build deep, lasting relationships with others, to feel pleasure, and to contribute meaningfully to the world? In a word, what is it that allows you to flourish? “Well-being” takes the stage front and center, and Happiness (or Positive Emotion) becomes one of the five pillars of Positive Psychology, along with Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment—or PERMA, the permanent building blocks for a life of profound fulfillment. Thought-provoking in its implications for education, economics, therapy, medicine, and public policy—the very fabric of society—Flourish tells inspiring stories of Positive Psychology in action, including how the entire U.S. Army is now trained in emotional resilience; how innovative schools can educate for fulfillment in life and not just for workplace success; and how corporations can improve performance at the same time as they raise employee well-being. With interactive exercises to help readers explore their own attitudes and aims, Flourish is a watershed in the understanding of happiness as well as a tool for getting the most out of life. On the cutting edge of a science that has changed millions of lives, Dr. Seligman now creates the ultimate extension and capstone of his bestselling classics, Authentic Happiness and Learned Optimism.

Irregular People


Joyce Landorf Heatherley - 1986
    Who is your "irregular person?" Joyce brings wise and healing words to help you deal with those insensitive family members who have crushed your spirit with their emotional neglect and abuse.

The Parenting Breakthrough: Real-Life Plan to Teach Your Kids to Work, Save Money, and Be Truly Independent


Merrilee Browne Boyack - 2005
    Boyack Fun and practical, author Merrilee Boycak will have readers laughing out loud as well as feeling grateful for her parenting advice. She s a mom who s spent the last 22 years in the real-life work of parenting. "I have four sons, 13, 15, 17, and 22. You know what that means," she writes. "I m an absolute expert in raising children 23 and older." Merrilee offers the "LDS parenting owner s manual they forgot to give you" for training kids - from toddlers to teens - to be independent. It includes ideas for how to teach kids about money, investing, debt, and the importance of earning their own money; how to teach children to serve; how to help children with emotional and spiritual development; and much more.

Parenting Without Power Struggles: Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm and Connected


Susan Stiffelman - 2009
    But let's face it: family life can get downright crazy, and it's at those moments that we most need to keep our cool. Family therapist Susan Stiffelman has shown thousands of parents how to be the cool, confident "Captain of the ship" in their children's lives. Based on her successful practice and packed with real-life stories, Susan shares proven strategies and crystal clear insights to motivate kids to cooperate and connect. Parenting without Power Struggles is an extraordinary guidebook for transforming your day-to-day parenting life. You'll discover how to: • Transform frustration and aggression into adaptation and cooperation • Keep your cool when your kids push your buttons, talk back or refuse to "play nice" • Nourish deep attachment with young and older kids • Help your ADD'ish child survive and thrive, even if you’re ADD'ish yourself • Inoculate your kids from negative thinking and peer pressure that lead to anger, anxiety, depression, or behavior issues • Help children manage the emotional challenges of divorce

Retired Racing Greyhounds for Dummies


Lee Livingood - 2000
    Nowadays, Greyhounds are bred almost exclusively for racing. In the bad old days, prior to the 1980s, dogs that didn't make the grade at the track, and those past their primes, were destroyed. According to official estimates, 60,000 of these noble, mild-mannered dogs were destroyed each year! Fortunately, a number of organizations now exist devoted to rescuing these unwanted dogs and placing them in good homes.Thinking about adopting a retired racing Greyhound? Or maybe you're already sharing your life with one of these charming animals. Either way, this friendly guide tells you everything you need to know to:Understand the Greyhound personality Find a retired racing Greyhound to adopt Choose the right ex-racer for you and your family Educate yourself and your retired racer Give your new pal the diet and exercise it needs Keep your dog healthy and happy for years to come With plenty of good humor and straight-talk, Lee Livingood drawing on her forty-years of experience training adult rescue dogs to cover all the pros and cons of being a retired racing Greyhound owner, and she fills you in on:The amazing 8000-year history of the Greyhound Deciding whether an ex-racer is the right do for you and your family Physical and behavioral characteristics How to get a retired racer used to living in a home and be a companion Dealing with common behavioral and health problems Feeding, grooming, and exercising a Greyhound Fun things to do with your hound Bursting with expert advice on all aspects of living with an ex-racer, Retired Racing Greyhounds For Dummies is must reading for anyone considering adoption or who's already taken the leap.

Thank You for Being Such a Pain: Spiritual Guidance for Dealing with Difficult People


Mark Rosen - 1998
    By embracing four fundamental premises and putting into practice the author's many helpful and practical suggestions, you'll acquire the skills and insights necessary for turning around even the most troublesome relationship. What you need to keep in mind is that: (1) nothing in your life happens randomly and your difficulties have a deeper purpose; (2) frustration and even emotional pain are as necessary for your personal and spiritual growth as love and joy; (3) transforming enmity and completing unfinished business may be the most important skills you can learn in life; and (4) when you make an effort to work on your inner self, your outer relationships will be transformed.        This groundbreaking book draws upon state-of-the-art psychological principles and timeless spiritual practices from all traditions. Filled with enlightening exercises and entertaining stories, Thank You for Being Such a Pain will forever change the way you see the difficult people in your life . . . as well as the way you see yourself.