This is the book that brought gender differences in ways of speaking to the forefront of public awareness. With a rare combination of scientific insight and delightful, humorous writing, Tannen shows why women and men can walk away from the same conversation with completely different impressions of what was said.Studded with lively and entertaining examples of real conversations, this book gives you the tools to understand what went wrong -- and to find a common language in which to strengthen relationships at work and at home. A classic in the field of interpersonal relations, this book will change forever the way you approach conversations.

    This is what bestselling author Warren Farrell discovered when he took a stand against established views of the male role in society, and pursued o course of study to find out who men really are. Here are the eye-opening, heart-rending, and undeniably enlightening results...

    But can straight white guys experience the same easy sexual fluidity, or would kissing a guy just mean that they are really gay? Not Gay thrusts deep into a world where straight guy-on-guy action is not a myth but a reality: there’s fraternity and military hazing rituals, where new recruits are made to grab each other’s penises and stick fingers up their fellow members’ anuses; online personal ads, where straight men seek other straight men to masturbate with; and, last but not least, the long and clandestine history of straight men frequenting public restrooms for sexual encounters with other men. For Jane Ward, these sexual practices reveal a unique social space where straight white men can—and do—have sex with other straight white men; in fact, she argues, to do so reaffirms rather than challenges their gender and racial identity.Ward illustrates that sex between straight white men allows them to leverage whiteness and masculinity to authenticate their heterosexuality in the context of sex with men. By understanding their same-sex sexual practice as meaningless, accidental, or even necessary, straight white men can perform homosexual contact in heterosexual ways. These sex acts are not slippages into a queer way of being or expressions of a desired but unarticulated gay identity. Instead, Ward argues, they reveal the fluidity and complexity that characterizes all human sexual desire. In the end, Ward’s analysis offers a new way to think about heterosexuality—not as the opposite or absence of homosexuality, but as its own unique mode of engaging in homosexual sex, a mode characterized by pretense, dis-identification and racial and heterosexual privilege. Daring, insightful, and brimming with wit, Not Gay is a fascinating new take on the complexities of heterosexuality in the modern era.

    Around the women who intimidate you most you struggle to think of what to say, sabotage yourself in ways you don't fully understand, and feel confused about when and how to express your sexuality. You worry that you'll have to settle for someone who you're not all that excited to be with (if you're lucky enough to find anyone) and/or face a messy divorce when it inevitably doesn't work out. That's why I wrote this book. I've coached men on improving their social and dating lives for over a decade, charging thousands of dollars for a weekend program, appearing on national news outlets, and amassing millions of views on youtube. I have a success rate with my clients that puts the rest of the industry to shame, and this book represents the very best of what I teach. I want to make this knowledge available now because I know what it's like to feel as though you'll have to settle for whatever comes along... like the women you really want to be with are speaking a different language. I wrote this book because I wish I had it back in middle school. This isn't a collection of pickup lines or tricks. Let's face it - if those worked, you wouldn't be reading this right now. Simply put, this book teaches you to be that person you are when you're "in the zone" all the time. It's about stripping away all the things that are keeping you from being naturally attractive. You've always known that, "just be yourself," was good advice, otherwise it wouldn't be repeated so often. This is the book that finally explains how to do it. In this book you're going to learn: - How to eliminate "rejection" - Why the words you say don't really matter - The action to take that will always get you "in the zone" - How to identify the women that really want you to approach them - Understanding what flirting means, and how to become a master at it - What to text if she doesn't respond - How to know exactly when she wants you to make the move - What to say to start a conversation in any situation - How to make conversations with people who intimidate you flow as smoothly as chats with your best friends - How to get her to contribute equally to the conversation so you don't do most of the talking and run out of things to say - How to easily overcome awkward silences - The secret to being funny - How to move an interaction forward sexually without ever worrying about being called "inappropriate" or "creepy" - How to get a phone number that turns into a date 90% of the time - How to ensure your dates are charged with sexual tension rather than ending in an awkward kiss attempt - The way sexual attraction actually works, and why the lessons you've learned your entire life are wrong - How to turn a friendship into something more - How to build a social circle so you'll always have a "wingman" or someone to hang out with - How to always look great, even if you're shopping on a budget - How to scream confidence with your body language instead of insecurity - The difference between "He was ok" and "He's awesome" - How to develop yourself into the man who naturally attracts the woman (or women) you really want Don't expect anything overly-complicated.

    An unconventional argument for the preservation of pornography asserts that pornography can serve to benefit the feminist movement and promote sexual freedom for women, and explores the historical relationship between women and pornography.

    Then she is publicly hanged alongside her attacker. These events took place in 1644, in Boston, where today they would beviewed with horror. How--and when--did such a complete transformation of our culture's attitudes toward sex occur?In The Origins of Sex, Faramerz Dabhoiwala provides a landmark history, one that will revolutionize our understanding of the origins of sexuality in modern Western culture. For millennia, sex had been strictly regulated by the Church, the state, and society, who vigorously and brutally attempted topunish any sex outside of marriage. But by 1800, everything had changed. Drawing on vast research--from canon law to court cases, from novels to pornography, not to mention the diaries and letters of people great and ordinary--Dabhoiwala shows how this dramatic change came about, tracing theinterplay of intellectual trends, religious and cultural shifts, and politics and demographics. The Enlightenment led to the presumption that sex was a private matter; that morality could not be imposed; that men, not women, were the more lustful gender. Moreover, the rise of cities erodedcommunity-based moral policing, and religious divisions undermined both church authority and fear of divine punishment. Sex became a central topic in poetry, drama, and fiction; diarists such as Samuel Pepys obsessed over it. In the 1700s, it became possible for a Church of Scotland leader tocommend complete sexual liberty for both men and women. Arguing that the sexual revolution that really counted occurred long before the cultural movement of the 1960s, Dabhoiwala offers readers an engaging and wholly original look at the Western world's relationship to sex.Deeply researched and powerfully argued, The Origins of Sex is a major work of history.

    Becoming Orgasmic will help you: -Evaluate your sexual history and put it in perspective -Explore your body through touch -Understand the effects of pregnancy, menstruation, and menopause on sexual desire and response -Be comfortable with your body and yourself as a woman -Share self-discovery with your partner -Find techniques to try if something turns you off -Overcome the fear of orgasm -Learn how to bring yourself to orgasm -Practice safe sex in today's world—precautionary measures, social expectations, personal values, and choosing a partner in the age of AIDS A personal and sensitively written book that is also informative, Becoming Orgasmic is designed to make you feel good about your sexuality and yourself.

    Surprising to those feminists who mistakenly think that biology can only work against women. And surprising to those biologists who incorrectly believe that natural selection operates only on males.In The Woman That Never Evolved we are introduced to our nearest female relatives competitive, independent, sexually assertive primates who have every bit as much at stake in the evolutionary game as their male counterparts do. These females compete among themselves for rank and resources, but will bond together for mutual defense. They risk their lives to protect their young, yet consort with the very male who murdered their offspring when successful reproduction depends upon it. They tolerate other breeding females if food is plentiful, but chase them away when monogamy is the optimal strategy. When promiscuity is an advantage, female primates--like their human cousins--exhibit a sexual appetite that ensures a range of breeding partners. From case after case we are led to the conclusion that the sexually passive, noncompetitive, all-nurturing woman of prevailing myth never could have evolved within the primate order.Yet males are almost universally dominant over females in primate species, and Homo sapiens is no exception. As we see from this book, women are in some ways the most oppressed of all female primates. Sarah Blaffer Hrdy is convinced that to redress sexual inequality in human societies, we must first understand its evolutionary origins. We cannot travel back in time to meet our own remote ancestors, but we can study those surrogates we have--the other living primates. If women --and not biology--are to control their own destiny, they must understand the past and, as this book shows us, the biological legacy they have inherited.

    Just say yes!Meet Olive Persimmon. Growing up, she looked exactly like Danny DeVito, except she was thirteen and a girl. By some miracle, she grew into a relatively normal, well-adjusted thirty-something woman living in New York City—with one notable exception: she hasn’t had sex in five years, one month, three days, two-point-five hours . . . and counting.Faced with bona fide sex rut, she decides it's time to take action to save her love life and get her mojo back. Challenged by a friend to "say yes" to experiences she might normally avoid, Olive embarks on a series of adventures and explores everything from BDSM classes to cuddlers-for-hire, from foot fetishes to lessons with a top-ranked pickup artist, and more! Each awkward, funny, and sometimes downright embarrassing encounter brings Olive closer to discovering the power of saying yes—to herself, others, and life itself.For fans of Jenny Slate, this is a funny, irreverent, and honest tale of one young woman's journey to reclaim her sexuality on the fringes of New York City's sex and dating world.Readers can see for themselves how this girl next door overcame insecurities around dating, sex, and love--all with openness, honesty, and a wicked sense of humor. Along the way, readers will wonder: Will Olive ever have sex again? Will her love life be okay? Will her toe fungus come back? Does she ever find her mojo, and where was it hiding?

    In poetic, nuanced prose she charts how unchecked risk-taking eventually gave way to a course of self-destruction. But as she recounts crossing over the very boundaries that she set for her own safety, she never plays the victim. In fact, the glory of this memoir is Melissa’s ability to illuminate the strange and powerful truths that she learned as she found her way out of a hell of her own making. Rest assured; the reader will emerge from the journey more or less unscathed.

    A celebration of the discerning singles everywhere–the quirkyalone!There was a time when a single woman over 25 was called an old maid. Mothers fretted these unfortunate creatures might be condemned to a committing a crime of tragic proportions: living a life of eternal spinsterhood. Fortunately, in the 21st century, tv shows like Sex and the City affirm that it's more than ok – it's cool to be single. Sasha Cagen has coined the term that defines the lonely romantic who prefers her (or his) own company to that of a less desirable counterpart. Defining "singledom as a natural resting state" for quirkyalones, Cagen's guide is the best kind of self–empowerment: incisive, savvy, hilarious. Equal parts self–help and hilarious pop culture, QuirkyAlone is self–empowerment for the wise people of the world. Including quizzes, lists, it's not–your–average–relationship–book.

    In juxtaposing sex and the unbearable they don't propose that sex is unbearable, only that it unleashes unbearable contradictions that we nonetheless struggle to bear. In Berlant and Edelman's exchange, those terms invoke disturbances produced in encounters with others, ourselves, and the world, disturbances that tap into threats induced by fears of loss or rupture as well as by our hopes for repair. Through virtuoso interpretations of works of cinema, photography, critical theory, and literature, including Lydia Davis's story "Break It Down" (reprinted in full here), Berlant and Edelman explore what it means to live with negativity, with those divisions that may be irreparable. Together, they consider how such negativity affects politics, theory, and intimately felt encounters. But where their critical approaches differ, neither hesitates to voice disagreement. Their very discussion—punctuated with moments of frustration, misconstruction, anxiety, aggression, recognition, exhilaration, and inspiration—enacts both the difficulty and the potential of encounter, the subject of this unusual exchange between two eminent critics and close friends.

    He sees them as intrinsic to the development of modern societies as a whole and to the broad characteristics of that development. Sexuality as we know it today is a creation of modernity, a terrain upon which the contradictory tendencies of modern social life play themselves out in full. Emancipation and oppression, opportunity and risk—these have become a part of a heady mix that irresistably ties our individual lives to global outcomes and the transformation of intimacy.We live today in a social order in which, for the first time in histroy, women are becoming equal to men—or at least have lodged a claim to such equality as their right. The author does not attempt to analyze the gender inequalities that persist in the economic or political domains, but instead concentrates on a more hisdden personal area in which women—ordinary women, in the course of their day-to-day lives, quite apart from any political agenda—have pioneered changes of greate, and generalizable, importance. These changes essentially concern an exploration of the potentialities of the “pure relationship,” a relaitonship that presumes sexual and emotional equality, and is explosive in its connotations for pre-existing relations of power.The author analyzes the emergence of what he calls plastic sexuality—sexuality freed from its intrinsic relation to reproduction—in terms of the emotional emancipation implicit in the pure relationship, as well as women’s claim to sexual pleasure. Plastic sexuality is decentered sexuality, freed from both reproduction and subservience to a fixed object. It can be molded as a trait of personality, and thus become bound up with the reflexivity of the self. Premised on plastic sexuality, the pure relationship is not exclusively heterosexual; it is neutral in terms of sexual orientation.The author speculates that the transformaion of intimacy might be a subversive influence on modern institutions as a whole, for a social world in which the dominant ideal was to achieve intinsic rewards from the company of others might be vastly different from that which we know at the present.

    Leil Lowndes reveals the 26 undercover sex signals that can help put the average guy right on top of his game and offers advice to help him to stay there.

    The Red Queen answers dozens of other riddles of human nature and culture -- including why men propose marriage, the method behind our maddening notions of beauty, and the disquieting fact that a woman is more likely to conceive a child by an adulterous lover than by her husband. Brilliantly written, The Red Queen offers an extraordinary new way of interpreting the human condition and how it has evolved.