Okay yes, all that stuff too, but I'm not talking about that right now. The government has also been lying to us about space aliens. Aliens have landed on the National Mall and are asking to speak with the President of the United States. For the sake of the planet, diplomat Michael Wallenson is tasked with keeping them away from Donald Trump at all costs. Will Michael succeed? Or will these heavily armed, easily offended aliens succeed in reaching our leader? Building the border dome, coal-powered missiles, and the true identities of the men in black - all in Take Us To Your Trump, another hilarious satirical comedy from author Andrew Stanek.

    Barry's set of experiences with these legends of humour is unique, and will delight all who made PIGS CAN FLY a runaway porcine bestseller. In this completely new, organically grown book, old Baz recalls, reminisces, recounts and other words beginning with 'R', on a trip down Memory Lane, pausing only for tea and macaroons at the Stannah Stairlift Cafe. What memories - if only he can remember them. Currently 74, a third of his life has already passed and he invites you to enjoy this wonderfully funny account of it, a decorous orgy of nostalgia.

    Wake his kid brother Andy up, get tormented on the school bus by the cool kids, try to avoid them while in school. Except it's Field Trip Day to the Science Museum, and now he's stuck with the meanest kids in seventh grade all day! But then the bus breaks down, so he doesn't even get to do anything cool at the science museum. It's okay, because an industrial accident brings science to Todd and his friends in the form of a zombie apocalypse. When the bus driver abandons them in the middle of a zombie outbreak, Todd, his brother Andy, his best friend Tarik, and their tomboy friend Mikayla take shelter in the first place they can find - an adult novelty store. What can you find in an adult toy store to fight zombies? Well…let's just say that the field trip was pretty educational, even if the kids never made it to the museum! Shingles is the comedy horror series from the gang that brings you the Authors & Dragons podcast. Like the podcast, these books are rated Not Safe For Anything.

    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

    The British games industry would go on to create such hits as Tomb Raider and Grand Theft Auto, our innovation and imagination the envy of the world, our programmers the most sought after talent in the fastest growing entertainment medium in history.And it all started here.Welcome to the Speccy Nation.Join veteran games journalist and author Dan Whitehead on a journey through fifty games that helped to define the golden age of British gaming. From the timeless classics to unlikely cult favourites, and even the games so eccentric they could only have come from Britain in the 1980s.Part nostalgic look at the past, and part critical eye on the present and future, Speccy Nation is essential reading for all retro gaming enthusiasts.Includes a foreword by Your Sinclair's Phil "Snouty" South.

    

    (Do-it-yourself secret initiation rites included.)Master the secrets of designing adventures that tell stories.Create magic illusions that can even make your players disappear!Use actual fire in your game properly.Hijack the game as a player, and how to deal with a player revolution as an XDM.Plus loads more!If I could go back in time and rewrite Dragonlance, it would be this book...only with more dragons in it. --Tracy HickmanI can say without any shame or bias, that this is one of the best books ever written and should be in every hotel room next to the bible. --Curtis HickmanPossessed by the spirits of Da Vinci, Van Gogh, and Jack Fred, I illustrated a book that you should buy two of...one to read and one to hang on your wall.--Howard Tayler

    Doctor Ravinder Shah speaking. No case too weird, no problem too bizarre. Strangeness a speciality. How can I help you?” London Social Worker Rav Shah moonlights as a paranormal detective, aided by one of his clients and a Border Collie he rents by the hour. It was supposed to be a bit of fun: a search for truths out there; a quest for a life more interesting than the one that fate, destiny, and personal apathy had granted him. But then a case involving a Yorkshire farmer and a herd of flying pigs leads him into a world darker and more dangerous than he’d ever dreamed. The truth is indeed out there. And it’s got Rav square in its sights.

    That was, of course, because they didn’t know that Camp Tekonichia was home to boundless spirit energy, three very bored ghosts, and a powerful magic spell on the verge of completion. Now, these three will have to race against time and an ancient evil trying to stop the whole world from turning into a haven for restless spirits. Aided only by a mysterious medium and the camp’s resident ghosts, none of them have a clue how they’re supposed to save the world. Especially since they only have until sunrise to do it.

    He's kind to animals, loves children and helps old ladies across the street. But when he gets a pencil in his hands, he becomes a menace. No subject is too taboo. From dead kittens, to Helen Keller, to organized religion, there's no subject he won't twist. Politically correct? Dan Collins doesn't know the meaning.You've never seen cartoons like this before. This definitely isn't the Sunday funnies. Hilarious, demented and guaranteed to have you clutching your navel between gasps for air. Once you get hold of this book, you'll be convinced that this guy needs serious help before he's doomed to an eternity in hell.Check out this collection of insane cartoons and see if you're as demented as Dan Collins. If you find yourself laughing hysterically at some of the most marvelously bent cartoons ever created, plan on joining him on his decent into the inferno.From an early age Dan was heavily influenced by revolutionary comic artists such as Robert Crumb, B. Kliban, Gahan Wilson and Sam Gross. Coming from small town Ohio to Ohio State University in the early, turbulent 70's was a cultural and political awakening for him that would have a lasting impact. The Vietnam War and the counter culture revolution were the back drop from which this small town choirboy 'innocent' would pen his creations. What emerged were some of the most off the wall cartoons ever drawn.

    He's in dire straits.From Bestselling authors Isobella Crowley and Michael Anderle.Last Ditch Effort:While his rapidly dwindling checking account is a problem, Remy finds out the last company he owns is run by something that goes bump in the night.And she is willing to bump him off if he fails to live up to her expectations.Trying to get sober, Remy needs to work the day shift for Moonlight Detective Agency. Can he learn the ropes before the faeries, werewolves or his supposed employee kills him off?There is only one way to find out. Accomplish what Taylor sets out for him to do, or die trying.Diamond in The Rough:The secret world is being hidden by a vampire hundreds of years old - and her human frat-boy apprentice. He might shape up to be an asset. If she doesn't kill him first.Between setting up the office and hiring new preternatural staff, with some surprising...talents, Taylor tasks Remy with a new case.She assumes he will stick to her instructions.But this is Remy.Reformed frat boy. Low compliance. With a desperate need to prove himself...Of course, he won’t stick to the plan.So when things heat up with the dwarven cartel - and the preternatural world order hangs in the balance - it'll take everything Taylor has to prevent the city of NY being exposed to all she's managed to kept secret for centuries.Will Taylor decide that Remy needs to take the final nap for the benefit of everyone? Will everything go up in a Frat-Boy blaze of glory? What happens when Remy starts to get a clue?A GIrl's Best Friend:Taylor sets Remy on the trail of a dwarven drug cartel responsible for supplying humans with preternatural drugs. Is this just another way to test if Remy can stay alive?Drugs that are deadly to humans. In order to prevent countless human deaths and keep the preternatural world hidden, Remy has to stop the deal from happening AND take out the supply chain.This would be just a regular Tuesday except Moswen is closing in and her attacks are getting more targeted.To save both worlds, the team have to survive – and that is going to take all their wits and resources - and wits are in short supply.Under Pressure:With Moswen still on the loose and the whole preternatural world in mortal danger, Taylor realizes that drastic times call for drastic measures.Meanwhile, Remy and the team - oblivious to the dire situation Taylor is getting into - work to track down Moswen and her goons.A clear plan of what they're going to do if they find her, eludes them...How do they take on the world's oldest, most powerful vampire?Of course, Moswen is tracking their every move and intends to pick them off one by one before they can get close.Their only course of action is to go balls out to take her out first, in the most cunning way they know how...Will what they know be enough? Or will Moswen accomplish killing Taylor and completing her plans?

    Now, Harry shares many of his hilarious insider tips.

    Unfortunately they have no real resources, no good plans, and no idea what the hell they're doing. What they do have is an army of foul-mouthed monkeys who want them dead, a beautiful woman who wants some answers, a sex-crazed tribal chief, a caffeine-addicted demigod who wants to be worshipped, and a telepathic skull who just wants a little excitement. Through nonstop comedy and good old-fashioned adventure these guys are facing some long odds but do Ron and Willy give up? No they don't. They get down to business. Monkey Business.

    Originally published by Palliard Press.