But when his wife’s office holiday party turns into a deadly hostage situation, he has to save her life before he can get home in time for Christmas!The unconventional fan-favorite movie Die Hard is now an illustrated storybook—complete with machine guns, European terrorists, and a cop who’s forced to rely on all his cunning and skills (and the help of a fellow officer) to save the day. Based on the classic "Night Before Christmas" poem and filled with whimsical illustrations, this cleverly reimagined homage is destined to become a holiday classic.*Contains adult material including violence and strong language. Reader discretion is advised. Ho-ho-ho.

    She doesn't do new or risky. She’s happy enough with her job at the local market, it’s cool that she has no boyfriend to fret over, she even likes that she still lives in her childhood home. No drama, no fuss, no problems. Everything is fine. Super duper fine. Except … Olive's best friend in the world​, Birdie, is dying. Birdie has one final wish. She wants to track down her first love, Chuck, and because she's stuck in the hospital she needs Olive's help to do it. But there’s a teeny problem: Chuck is somewhere in New York and Olive has never even left her home town, let alone roamed the crazy streets of Manhattan. As if the big city isn't scary enough, Olive has to contend with Seth, a cocky comedy TV writer who thinks she’s a joke; Anders, a bored socialite who’s taken a shine to her; and the fact that no matter how hard she tries to track down Chuck, he doesn't seem to want to be found. Can Olive learn to overcome her fears, abandon her old safe routine and fulfil her best friend’s last wish?  It's going to take extra bravery, one badass attitude and a whole lot of big sexy love to make this happen …

    Join Zoe Lake-Winters, her husband Aric and their daughter Sami for three more adventures, including the ultimate battle for survival back where it all started … Covenant College. Watch Zoe and Aric struggle with parenting a tempestuous tween while holding off the dark forces that want to claim their powerful offspring for their own nefarious devices. It all ends here, and the ultimate fight is going to be something no one ever forgets. This three-book omnibus includes Haunted Covenant, Desperate Covenant and Everlasting Covenant.

    Without warning, Beth suddenly finds herself embroiled in a sinister series of events that threaten to destroy everything she holds dear. All seems lost for Beth until she receives an offer of help from an unlikely visitor — a former gangland fixer by the name of Clement. However, there’s one minor issue in that Clement claims he died in 1975 and been sent to help Beth to atone for his actions in a previous life.With just seven days to avoid a fate she’d rather not contemplate, Beth reluctantly joins her deluded, politically-incorrect companion on a quest across London in search of a solution. Will this unlikely partnership succeed? Will Clement ever come to terms with paying five quid for a pint? And will Beth ever learn the truth about who sent Clement?

    Today, their daily YouTube talk show, Good Mythical Morning, is the most-watched daily talk show on the Internet, and nearly 12 million subscribers tune in to see the guys broadcast brainy trivia, wild experiments, and hilarious banter (not to mention the occasional cereal bath). Now the award-winning comedians are finally bringing their “Mythical” world to the printed page in their first book.A hilarious blend of autobiography, trivia, and advice, Rhett & Link's Book of Mythicality: A Field Guide to Curiosity, Creativity, and Tomfoolery will offer twenty ways to add “Mythicality” to your life, including:Eat Something That Scares YouMake a Bold Hair ChoiceInvent Something RidiculousSay “I Love You” Like It's Never Been SaidSpeak at Your Own FuneralThe goal of these offbeat prompts? To learn new things, laugh more often, and earn a few grown-up merit badges along the way. Heartfelt and completely original, this book will be the perfect gift for anyone looking for a fresh dose of humor and fun.

    Thus CHACHA CHAUDHARY was born in 1971.Tall and robust SABU, who is an inhabitant of planet Jupiter, gave Chaudhary an ideal company. A combination of wisdom and strength was formed to tackle any difficult task. It is said that " Chacha Chaudhary's brain works faster than a computer". Though both fight the criminals and tricksters, each episode ends with a touch of humour. The duo perform in lighter vein. The CHAUDHARY family consists of his wife Bini, a fat sharp tongue woman, Sabu, Rocket - the dog and Dag- Dag, an old truck who is half human- half machine. Chacha Chaudhary is the most popular Indian comics. More than 10 million readers enjoy this series regularly in newspapers and comic books in ten languages. A T.V. serial based on the comics has crossed 500 episodes and still continue to be telecast on premier channel "Sahara ONE".

    easily as funny, as self-deprecating and as wordly-wise as The Moon's a Balloon by David Niven ... it's like Tom and Jerry written by a Cockney Roddy Doyle on Prozac. But funnier' GQ Online on Going Off Alarming 'Rattles along at the same delightful and dizzying pace as its predecessor ... Baker loves a tale told at his own expense and they come thick and fast. He writes like he speaks, with hyperactive garrulity and a rhetorical flourish ... there is something about Baker in full flow that is affirming' Daily Telegraph on Going Off Alarming Danny Baker is a national treasure with a well-documented - thanks to the recent eight-part BBC TV adaptation - and colourful life. For over a quarter of a century he has amused and entertained audiences on both radio and television. Beginning his career at the age of 15 in a small record shop in the London's West End, Danny went on to become an acclaimed music journalist, and started his radio career on BBC GLR in 1989. With a unique take on life and a lot to say, Danny's latest book is full of his trademark warmth, wit and insight.

    Rules for being a man:Don't Cry; Love Sport; Play Rough; Drink Beer; Don't Talk About FeelingsBut Robert Webb has been wondering for some time now: are those rules actually any use? To anyone?Looking back over his life, from schoolboy crushes (on girls and boys) to discovering the power of making people laugh (in the Cambridge Footlights with David Mitchell), and from losing his beloved mother to becoming a husband and father, Robert Webb considers the absurd expectations boys and men have thrust upon them at every stage of life.Hilarious and heartbreaking, How Not To Be a Boy explores the relationships that made Robert who he is as a man, the lessons we learn as sons and daughters, and the understanding that sometimes you aren't the Luke Skywalker of your life - you're actually Darth Vader.

    In fact, if you’re stuck in a bit of a reading rut, it’s just the palate cleanser you need.” Emerald Street Longlisted for the Bath Novel Award 2017 Jonathon Fairfax, the world’s most socially awkward hero, works for a giant corporation where he specialises in muttering ‘um’ and tripping over bins. When he accidentally discovers a colossal corporate conspiracy, it soon becomes clear that someone will do anything to keep it secret – including murder. Read the book on its own or as a follow-up to The Perpetual Astonishment of Jonathon Fairfax – an Amazon UK #1 bestseller that was shortlisted for the Bath Novel Award 2014. Stylist called it ‘a comic gem’ and The Guardian said, ‘you can’t help being tickled’. "This one is even better than the one before. Buy!” John Lenahan (bestselling author, magician and voice of the toaster in Red Dwarf) How readers describe it… “A cross between PG Wodehouse and Tom Sharpe.” "Christopher Shevlin writes the funniest dialogue you'll ever read so you may need to find a private space with this book unless you don't mind laughing out loud in public places.” “Laugh out loud funny and thought provoking at the same time." "This is the funniest book I have read in years.” "Shevlin is a modern English Kurt Vonnegut.” "Uplifting, a great little gem of a book.” "I love the Jonathon Fairfax books. They're like a big hug for your neuroses.” “There are beautiful sentences on every page." "You'll love the characters and the writing style. What I would give to spend an evening at the local pub with Jonathan and co.” "Excellent. Every sentence is somewhere between amusing and laugh-out-loud funny.” "Funny but unusually also a page turner.” "The only downside is that I find myself missing the characters.”

    If you haven't done those things but wish you had, This Is Your Book. If you just want to laugh on a train/sofa/toilet or under your desk at work, This Is Your Book.

    Being a mom is hard. And the women who make it look easy? They're just better at lying. Trust us. We're all bad at this.Have you ever sent the wrong thumb drive to school with your daughter, only to have her stupid-hot teacher discover your erotica stories?Tried to recapture the magic with your husband, only to be blocked by a child at every turn?Remember blissfully turning on your breast pump only to howl in pain?Or how about that doctor-ordered dry spell that just never ends after having a baby?Oh yeah, we've been there. Pardon us while we dust off our collective Mother of the Year trophy and proudly present you with an epic anthology of #MOMFAILS.Featuring this amazing lineup: Alissa York, A.M. Willard, BL Berry, Carina Adams, Claudia Burgoa, Crystal Burnette, Dylan Allen, Faith Andrews, Gia Riley, J.A. DeRouen, Kate Anslinger, Leddy Harper, LK Collins, LL Collins, Marie James, Piper Rayne, Riann C. Miller, Shari Ryan, Stephanie Rose, Stephie Walls, SM West, TL Swan, Teresa Michaels, and foreword written by: Nicole Kane Knepper

    Comedy shouldn’t take courage, but it made an exception for Bassem.” --Jon StewartSemi-Finalist in the Humor category in the Goodreads Choice Awards."The Jon Stewart of the Arabic World"—the creator of The Program, the most popular television show in Egypt’s history—chronicles his transformation from heart surgeon to political satirist, and offers crucial insight into the Arab Spring, the Egyptian Revolution, and the turmoil roiling the modern Middle East, all of which inspired the documentary about his life, Tickling Giants.Bassem Youssef’s incendiary satirical news program, Al-Bernameg (The Program), chronicled the events of the 2011 Egyptian Revolution, the fall of President Hosni Mubarak, and the rise of Mubarak’s successor, Mohamed Morsi. Youssef not only captured his nation’s dissent but stamped it with his own brand of humorous political criticism, in which the Egyptian government became the prime laughing stock.So potent were Youssef’s skits, jokes, and commentary, the authoritarian government accused him of insulting the Egyptian presidency and Islam. After a six-hour long police interrogation, Youssef was released. While his case was eventually dismissed, his television show was terminated, and Youssef, fearful for his safety, fled his homeland.In Revolution for Dummies, Youssef recounts his life and offers hysterical riffs on the hypocrisy, instability, and corruption that has long animated Egyptian politics. From the attempted cover-up of the violent clashes in Tahrir Square to the government’s announcement that it had created the world’s first "AIDS cure" machine, to the conviction of officials that Youssef was a CIA operative—recruited by Jon Stewart—to bring down the country through sarcasm. There’s much more—and it’s all insanely true.Interweaving the dramatic and inspiring stories of the development of his popular television show and his rise as the most contentious funny-man in Egypt, Youssef’s humorous, fast-paced takes on dictatorship, revolution, and the unforeseeable destiny of democracy in the Modern Middle East offers much needed hope and more than a few healing laughs. A documentary about his life, Tickling Giants, debuted at the Tribeca Film Festival in 2016, and is now scheduled for major release.

    I dreamt that I was a soldier, riding into battle ... completely naked, and on the back of a large, inflatable duck.' Matt Coyne's life was turned upside down by the arrival of his first child, Charlie. After three months of fatherhood, he logged on to Facebook and shared his experience of being newly responsible for 'a furious, sleep-murdering, unstable and incontinent, breasts-obsessed midget lodger'. Within days, his post had gone viral - and Matt is now a hero for parents everywhere, through his popular blog: 'Man vs. Baby'.Dummy is no average parenting book. It's packed with completely impractical, hands-on advice for the inept mum or dad - stuff you just won't find in any baby manual or guide: 'Profanity Bingo' for labour; a categorisation of various nappy disasters; how to counteract the baby plank manoeuvre, and much more. But it is also a story of how becoming a parent is a kind of beautiful insanity. A thing that changes you.Above all, Dummy will keep you laughing like a broken lunatic through the exhaustion, the mystery and the madness of bringing up your own children. This is the parenting book for real people.

    Here, a universal ranking system determines the social advantages and career opportunities of every member of society. An automated matchmaking service knows the best partners for everyone and helps with the break up when your ideal match (frequently) changes. And the foolproof algorithms of the biggest, most successful company in the world, TheShop, know what you want before you do and conveniently deliver to your doorstep before you even order it.In QualityCity, Peter Jobless is a machine scrapper who can't quite bring himself to destroy the imperfect machines sent his way, and has become the unwitting leader of a band of robotic misfits hidden in his home and workplace. One day, Peter receives a product from TheShop he absolutely, positively knows he does not want, and which he decides, at great personal cost, to return. The only problem: doing so means proving the perfect algorithm of TheShop wrong, calling into question the very foundations of QualityLand itself.

    She knew it was silly, but she clung to one irrational thread of hope their friend Patty’s concoction would grant her heart’s desire. Shawna’s hopes were dashed when Ashton packed up her things and went away to college completely unaware of Shawna’s feelings. Twenty-three years after Patty’s potion was brewed, Ashton returns to her hometown. She finds time has changed a lot, including Shawna. Ashton has done quite a bit of changing, too, and sees Shawna in a whole new light. Perhaps Patty’s potion was potent after all. In this romantic comedy, Robin Alexander has cooked up a humorous tale about enduring love and friendship.

    He’s in love with his work colleague Melanie and his only friend Gary is a conspiracy theory nut. His life is going nowhere until he has a Near Death Experience - though Death thinks of it as a Near Dave Experience. He discovers gifts he never knew he possessed and a world he never dreamed existed. A world where the Grim Reaper is a hard drinking, grumpy Billy Joel fan and the undead are bored, lonely and dangerous. This box set contains the first 3 stories in the How To Be Dead series: How To Be Dead Paper Cuts Old Haunts They tell the story of Death and his office staff protecting humanity from ghosts, zombies, vampires and medium-sized apocalypses. After a nice cup of tea and a biscuit. “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.” “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.” “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.” “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”

    The Book of the Year is a hilarious guide to 2017’s most extraordinary events, unearthed by the creators of the award-winning hit comedy podcast No Such Thing As A Fish. Each week, over a million people tune in to find out what bizarre and astonishing facts Dan, James, Anna and Andy have found out over the previous seven days. Now the gang have turned their attention to the news of the past twelve months. You’ll discover the curious details behind the main headlines – how Donald Trump slept on the 66th floor of a 58-storey building, what effect Brexit had on Coco Pops, and why China’s president can’t stand Winnie the Pooh – as well as hundreds of stories you may have missed entirely, like the news that:- Qatar built a refugee camp for camels- 2,000 bees were stolen in Beeston- The victim of Britain’s first ever shark attack ended up with a cut thumb. From bizarre arrests to baffling elections, via a surprising amount of sausage news, The Book of the Year is an eye-opening tour of the incredible year you didn’t know you’d lived through.

    Cats, that is. If you've got a feline nightmare on your hands, I'm the guy who can fix it.When I hear about a cat hoarder named Estelle, I envision a mentally unstable old lady, not the blond bombshell who opens the door.With a 100 percent success rate, I've never had trouble finishing a job. But just a few hours into this project and one thing is clear—Estelle and her band of misfit p*ssies will give me a run for my money… and my heart.Untamable is a standalone romantic comedy in the Night Time Television Series.

    Instead, she has a ‘nice’ life. Nice job. Nice flat. Absolutely no men. Until her life is turned upside-down when her elderly neighbour, Eulalie, passes away and leaves her the Château of Happily Ever Afters!But there’s a catch: she must share the sprawling French castle with Eulalie’s long-lost nephew, Julian. And no matter how gorgeous he is, or how easily she finds herself falling head over heels, Wendy needs to find a way to get rid of him… Because surely happily ever afters don’t happen in real life?

    You know, just for levity. While other comedians were seeking fame, Stanhope was seeking immediate gratification, dark spectacle, or sometimes just his pants. Not to say he hasn't rubbed elbows with fame. He's crashed its party, snorted its coke, and jumped into its pool naked, literally and often repeatedly -- all while artfully dodging fame himself. Doug spares no legally permissible detail, and his stories couldn't be told any other way. They're weird, uncomfortable, gross, disturbing, and fucking funny.This Is Not Fame is by no means a story of overcoming a life of excess, immorality, and reckless buffoonery. It's an outright celebration of it. For Stanhope, the party goes on.

    He doesn’t know his fiancé is a fortune teller either. He doesn’t know Russian culture, politics, or language, but he does know American business. And he knows his fiancé speaks Russian. He thinks she can make him the new Tsar of the timber industry, but first they must survive a weekend with the Russian mob. Red Russia is the story of an American businessman and his interpreter in Russia, of business, lies, and deception, of fortunes bought and told.

    Deep into month three he started to look like an armpit with eyeballs. It was a sultry August night in Old Town Scottsdale. As Bimisi and Sumguyen made their way from one bar to another, they took pause to to enjoy the rhythms of a homeless crooner who was soulfully picking his guitar. When Sumguyen threw a five into his tip jar the artist looked up, thanked him with a nod and said, “That is a beautiful beard. My friend Brenda has a beard just like that, but hers doesn’t talk.” A fair amount of beer sprayed from Bimisi’s nose...and just like that they had their subject matter for the final book of Season One.

     In an alien city torn apart by crooked cops and ruthless criminals, private detective, Dan Deadman, specializes in cases unusual and bizarre. Sure, he doesn't smell great, and he's technically been dead for quite some time, but if you've got a rampaging Hell-beast tearing up your street, or a portal to another dimension appearing in your bathroom, Dan's your man. After saving a mysterious young woman named Ollie from the clutches of something big, slimy, and unpleasant, Dan gets entangled in a missing child case, a string of grisly murders, and a severed woman's arm that just won't leave him alone. And then there's the demonic entity who'll stop at nothing to get its tentacles on Ollie, even if it means destroying the whole damn planet. Times like these, Dan would give his right nut to be a real detective. If he still had nuts. From the pages of Space Team: The Guns of Nana Joan, "Dial D for Deadman" is the first darkly comedic action adventure novel starring Dan Deadman, Space Detective.

    My waiting list is a mile long. The ladies crave me, and they'll pay for the pleasure.But though I hate to disappoint--everyone knows I leave my clients satisfied--it's getting old. Money, sex, and rock 'n roll can get stale. Who knew?I might just finish up, and pull out. I'll take one more gig, rock her world, and see my way out.I'll show one last lucky lady why they call me Thunder.* * *CLIENT: MADISONThat rotten, no good--My ex-boyfriend of too many years just left me three weeks before the most important wedding of my life.I wanted to make a statement at that wedding. I've changed. I'm no longer the loser who got dumped by the popular boy in high school. Now I'm a successful business woman with clear skin.But how can I possibly make that sort of statement as a loner?I can't, that's how.So when my friend suggests hiring a date from the Big D!ck Escort Service, it was hard to laugh it off. And as the days ticked by, it was harder and harder to deny that I needed saving.No sex, though. I'm not that kinda girl. I'll just hire the guy for a date, and nothing else.Just one date without any funny-business. That's do-able, right? This is a full-length, sexy rom-com STANDALONE novel with lots of jokes, steam and shenanigans.

     “The story blends heartwarming moments and action beautifully in a way that will make children of any age enjoy the book.” Readers’ Favorite 5★ review "Sweetly written and packed full of adventure. Children will love it, particularly if they love dogs!" The Wishing Shelf 11-year-old Jonas Ridley loves dogs. Unfortunately, his mother won’t let him have one of his own. But one Christmas, Jonas gets the chance to RENT a dog, and not just any dog but Rascal, the famous four-legged star of Jonas’s favorite movie, Canine Commando! Jonas and Rascal have a blast and really bond together, even performing in the school talent show. But when the movie studio has to take Rascal back, Jonas hatches a movie-like plan and becomes a real-life secret agent to rescue Rascal! If A Dog’s Purpose touched your heart, you'll love A Dog of My Own. This middle grade book is a sweet yet exciting adventure full of action and heartwarming moments for any reader – children, tweens, teens or readers of any age. This fun ‘boy and his dog’ story is the first in a series, so if you like it, there's more to come! (Don't forget to look for the surprise after Chapter 1!)

    What she hopes will be a fun vacation quickly turns out to be a nightmare. Falon is normally a woman who can roll with the punches, but life delivers a series of blows that knock her on her butt and leave her stranded in Honduras with the company of an uptight woman she doesn’t like. Haley Hollis isn’t having a good time, either. She spends two nights on the top deck of the ship after being locked out by her sexually adventurous cabin mate. Desperate to do something fun, she accepts an invitation from a new friend to join him on a zip line excursion. She only thinks the trip down the side of a mountain on a wire is the most terrifying thing she’ll ever experience. What Falon and Haley think is a disaster turns into a magical adventure in Robin Alexander’s latest romantic comedy, Fearless.

    She may hunt ghosts for a living (and help them pass over to the other side) but she often finds it more fun than frightening. Human beings and their penchant for murder and mischief is another story, of course. That doesn’t mean Harper doesn’t find the occasional bout of trouble. That’s what she’s known for, of course, even though her boyfriend Jared Monroe tries to dissuade her from it whenever possible. Join Harper and her merry bunch of friends in this three-book omnibus that includes Ghostly Worries, Ghostly Images, and Ghostly Wrecks. Have a ghost of a good time.

    Here, Stephen Rosenfield lays out a clear plan for achieving success, candidly explaining what works, what doesn’t, and why. Including a 12-item “Successful Comedian’s To-Do List,” Rosenfield states, “Get undeniably good at each of these and you can kiss your day job good-bye. You will be a pro.” The New York Times heralded Stephen Rosenfield as “probably the best known comedy teacher in the country.” His alumni include some of today’s most prominent comedians and comedy writers, such as Lena Dunham, Jim Gaffigan, Eric Slovin, and Jessica Kirson. Rosenfield has directed, coached, and/or written for these and hundreds of other comedians. As a pioneer in the field of teaching comedy, he founded the American Comedy Institute, the premier stand-up comedy school in the United States, in 1989.

    However, when her engagement starts to look more stalemate than soulmate, her best friend stages an intervention sure to make even the most hardened, serial daters wince: 10 Dates in 10 Days. Statistically, if you kiss a lot of frogs there's bound to be at least one that's not a complete toad, isn't there? With nothing to lose, Joanie embarks on a crazy rollercoaster of blind dates. After all, what can possibly go wrong in the search for Mr. Right? 10 Dates is a standalone, sexy, laugh out loud romantic comedy with a happy ending. It is not for the feint hearted and is best suited for readers over the age of eighteen due to sexual themes and mature content.

    Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.The question you’re probably asking yourself right now is: What does Kevin Hart have that a book also has?According to the three people who have seen Kevin Hart and a book in the same room, the answer is clear:A book is compact. Kevin Hart is compact.A book has a spine that holds it together. Kevin Hart has a spine that holds him together.A book has a beginning. Kevin Hart’s life uniquely qualifies him to write this book by also having a beginning.It begins in North Philadelphia. He was born an accident, unwanted by his parents. His father was a drug addict who was in and out of jail. His brother was a crack dealer and petty thief. And his mother was overwhelmingly strict, beating him with belts, frying pans, and his own toys.The odds, in short, were stacked against our young hero, just like the odds that are stacked against the release of a new book in this era of social media (where Hart has a following of over 100 million, by the way).But Kevin Hart, like Ernest Hemingway, JK Rowling, and Chocolate Droppa before him, was able to defy the odds and turn it around. In his literary debut, he takes the reader on a journey through what his life was, what it is today, and how he’s overcome each challenge to become the man he is today.And that man happens to be the biggest comedian in the world, with tours that sell out football stadiums and films that have collectively grossed over $3.5 billion.He achieved this not just through hard work, determination, and talent: It was through his unique way of looking at the world. Because just like a book has chapters, Hart sees life as a collection of chapters that each person gets to write for himself or herself.“Not only do you get to choose how you interpret each chapter, but your interpretation writes the next chapter,” he says. “So why not choose the interpretation that serves your life the best?”

    Some of these stories have been available elsewhere over the past few months, while others are new for this collection. The spectacular tales of space adventure you'll find within its pages are: "Dead Men Don't Get Paid" Undead detective, Dan Deadman, has a problem. He has a number of them, in fact. He's missing an arm. He needs money to repair his broken window. Someone has opened a portal to the hell-like Malwhere in a nightclub, filling the place with slavering flesh-eating monsters. Fortunately, Dan's diminutive house guest, Artur, has a plan to help him fix at least one of these problems, but like everything else in Dan's afterlife, nothing quite works out the way it should. A brand new Dan Deadman Space Detective adventure, set in the aftermath of "Dial D for Deadman". Space Team: The Holiday Special Die Hard meets The Nativity in Space! It's Space Christmas Eve, and all through the space station not a creature was stirring except a load of evil space pirates who're trying to kidnap a very special newborn baby so it can be eaten by their pirate king. They hadn't counted on Cal Carver and the Space Team, though, who happen to be on the station for some much needed R & R. Originally published in December 2016 as a standalone short story. The Last Bounty Once the baddest bounty hunter in the galaxy, all Konto Garr wants these days is a quiet family life with the woman he loves, and the respect of Deenia, the step-daughter who hates his guts. But when Deenia is taken hostage, Konto must employ all his skills to mount a death-defying rescue mission. With a terrorist-filled station between him and the hostages, and an infuriatingly upbeat boy from Deenia’s class for company, Konto's talents will be stretched to their limit as he goes after the most important bounty of his life—his daughter. Originally published as part of the comedy scifi anthology, "Pew Pew - Sex, Guns, Spaceships... Oh My!" Death Comes to Carverville - A Tobey Maguire Mystery Former Hollywood actor, Tobey Maguire, now spends his days as an imaginary construct inside the subconscious of Space Team's Cal Carver, only ever called upon when Cal is knocked unconscious. But when a murderer starts to stalk the corridors of Cal's mind, Tobey Maguire - accompanied by a wise-cracking racist squirrel only he can see or hear - must turn detective and unmask the killer before the imaginary inhabitants of Cal's head are picked off one by one, leaving Cal completely brain dead. The first ever solo Tobey Maguire adventure, written just for this collection. Nun Shall Pass Former Nun, Ronda Sallas, is on a mission to save her son, Narp, from himself. And also from some evil Xandrie gangsters who have tricked him into helping them steal a weapon of mass destruction. Mostly from them, actually. Fortunately, Ronda's time at the convent has left her more than capable to deal with a few dozen gangsters, but when an Anti-Nun strips her of her precognition powers, things suddenly become more difficult. First published in "The Expanding Universe - Volume 2" anthology. Splurt Home Alone An all-new short solo adventure starring everyone's favorite adorable green blob, Splurt.

    He is mistaken.Abducted by aliens and whisked across the galaxy, Cal is thrown into a team of misfits and criminals, and sent on a top secret mission for the President of Space. And that's when everything starts to go very, very wrong...This box set collects the first three bestselling adventures of Cal Carver and the crew of the dread ship Shatner, by multi-award-winning author, Barry J. Hutchison: Space Team Space Team: The Wrath of Vajazzle Space Team: The Search for Splurt

    Berkeley Breathed's Bloom County is back, with all-new, never before printed comic strips featuring everyones favorite penguin, and the rest of the quirky and endearing denizens of magical land called Bloom County! And, honestly, we need them all more than ever!Librarian Note: Limited Edition hardcover with same ISBN 9781684050970 located here

    Two gin and tonics. Three derelict beach-bum friends. Will Val’s fourth stab at starting over add up to a big fat zero?St. Pete Beach attracts weirdos like mosquitoes to a bug zapper. But when thrice-divorced native Val Fremden feels the tug to fly back to her old stomping grounds, she finds everyone and everything she knew squashed under the heels of change. Reluctantly cast into the weirdo world of down-and-outer beach bums, Val’s got nothing to go on but her own dry sense of humor and the life coach advice of a beer-guzzling old lady she meets at the beach. When an old hoarder passes away and leaves an uncertain heir to the throne, Val and her pals stir up a hornet’s nest trying to uncover the truth. Who’ll get stung and who’ll be named queen to the throne? It’s anybody's guess.If you like wacky, deeply flawed characters and laugh-out-loud situations, you’ll love Glad One! It’s the first book in Margaret Lashley’s hilarious Val Fremden Mystery Series.

    After graduating, she never left her temporary job at the motorway service station. Daily visits from a mysterious woman are the highlight of her days. Until one day, when the mystery woman vanishes. Amy investigates the disappearance and makes a shocking discovery. Suddenly, she’s being framed and no-nonsense Claudia McAllister is being sent to arrest her. Will Amy’s unique approach to evading capture prove successful?

    but not great.In TEMP GIRL, an entitled diva is forced to take a job at a temp agency to get by, and takes a tumble into reality.This TEMP GIRL, Part 1 novella is a month's worth of daily segments: JULYThe Part 1 novella is JULY, Part 2 is AUGUST, Part 3 is SEPTEMBER, Part 4 is OCTOBER, Part 5 is NOVEMBER, part 6 is DECEMBER.(In total there are 6 parts to TEMP GIRL.)Don't miss out on this fun story everyone will be talking about!

     Now the Tom Cat’s been domesticated and about to become a dad for the first time. If he can survive Hailey’s pregnancy, Baby 101 classes, and the holidays with his family. Let’s hope the stork has his own wingmen, because Tom’s not the only one of the guys to catch baby fever. In fact, the whole island seems to have it. This is one Christmas on Whidbey no one will ever forget. Five USA Today and New York Times bestselling authors have a special delivery this Christmas. They are releasing novels that feature characters from their top selling series –all announcing the birth of a new baby to bring extra joy to this holiday season. Cozy up with these amazing stories with characters you know and love for the ultimate feel-good romantic experience of 2017.

    His profile and reach is lightyears beyond where it was for Chins.Hail to the Chin will be bursting with pictures and the signature humor that Bruce brought to If Chins Could Kill and will be devoured by his legions of fans across the country.

    When Addison's Aunt Scarlet comes to town saying she found a murderer, she, Addison, and Rosemarie decide to go undercover because of the high bounty on the Romeo Bandit's head. The only problem is they have to go undercover at a nudist colony.

    If possible, try to recruit those closest to the target, such as his mom, sisters and closest friends. Sure, it sounds extreme and maybe a little bit crazy, but I’ve always subscribed to the old adage “No one worth having comes willingly.” Okay, I switched out some words there, but you get the point.Caution: Even the most foolproof plans can have hiccups along the way. I’ve taken the liberty of compiling a list of things you should watch out for: Crazy ex-boyfriends who pop up out of nowhere like an evil jack-in-the box; Women who think a strategic nip slip is effective at landing a boyfriend; Co-workers who think it’s hilarious to prank you at work and then upload the videos to social media.Still have doubts? No worries. I'll show you how it’s done.

    Bill Ryder STILL isn’t one of them.This omnibus edition contains the FINAL FOUR books of the bestselling Tome of Bill series - over 2000 pages of kick-ass action and geeky humor. A supernatural war, an ancient goddess, and a prophecy stating he’s destined to kill the woman he loves. Geek turned vampire Bill Ryder really doesn’t need this shit right now. Too bad that fate says otherwise. Now he’s got to become the hero he never wanted to be because otherwise the world and everyone in it will be royally screwed.Includes: GODDAMNED FREAKY MONSTERS (Book 5) Three months have passed since Bill Ryder mysteriously disappeared. Now he’s back and just in time because civilization is teetering on the brink of chaos. An ancient evil, the last remnant of a cult thought long dead, is about to cut a swath of destruction through the world not seen since biblical times. Bill’s only chance is to muster his friends and every last bit of attitude he can – because if he fails, Hell on Earth will become far more than just a corny saying. HALF A PRAYER (Book 6) An unstoppable terror has awoken deep beneath the Earth and it’s headed Bill’s way. To make matters worse, he’s been deemed a traitor by those he thought to be his allies. Now he finds himself fighting off enemies from all sides while warring with his feelings for the woman he loves. Talk about lousy timing for introspection. As the world crumbles around him, Bill must rise to the destiny he’s been trying to deny – because if he doesn’t, his love life will be the least of his worries. THE WICKED DEAD (Book 7) Bill Ryder has a powerful destiny. He just never expected it to involve an amnesiac bloodsucker, a bunch of D&D dorks, and a hormonal witch. Ordered to storm the vampire stronghold in Boston, Bill must approach the doorstep of the invincible undead warlord he’s destined to face. If he stands tall and faces his fate, the world might just have a chance of surviving. If he fails, an unquenchable evil will destroy everything he knows and loves. Why can’t the end of the world ever be easy? THE LAST COVEN (Book 8) A goddess returned, a war between primal powers, and a prophecy to fulfill. That’s a lot of crap to heap on anyone’s plate, but that’s exactly what Bill Ryder has to deal with. It’s finally time for him to master his powers, sort out his relationship woes, and figure out how to survive his date with destiny. Because if he can’t get his act together, the curtain will fall and mankind will be forever plunged into everlasting darkness. Join Bill in these tales full of monsters, mayhem, and foul-mouthed laughs. If you enjoy Jim Butcher, Kevin Hearne, or K.F. Breene then you're in for a bloody good time. Click BUY NOW and dive into the complete series today.

    That's all it takes to set the world spinning for Nate. Nathan J. Bentley, is a 100% All-American backwoods southern boy, with tattoos, piercings, and muscles. Life in the small town of Half Moon is all Nathan wants…that and his holler. A hollow in the woods next to Half Moon pond. It’s not just home for Nathan; it's a refuge, a place to breathe easy and find peace in a hectic world. One U-turn. That's all it takes for Cassie to find her future. Cassandra Jane Reimer's mad dash from her posh life, leads her to the door of Half Moon Motorcycle & Auto Repair, and right into Nathan's path. Half Moon may not have been her home by choice, but Cassie quickly finds her heart healing within its limits. And, when the past comes knocking, Half Moon has her back…and Nathan has her heart. One U-turn. That's all Nathan wants. To go back in time and change one innocent decision that may cost him his heart, his soul…his world. Just one U-turn.

    In no time at all, news spreads across the server about the adorable terror who can’t be defeated. While Maple may just be having fun, her broken build is sure to attract lots of unexpected attention...

    A girl struggles to survive in a zombie apocalypse and ends up finding herself a boyfriend! But there is a problem...he is undead!

     "A highly addictive read, which will keep many on the edge of their seats." "A well-written, heart-pumping, action-packed read." Readers' Favorite 5★ review “Hey, it’s me, Brian. Brian Ryan. I’m 14… well, next July I am. And I know what you’re thinking, but I’m not just some skateboard freak. Sure, I wipe out a lot, but I’m into the physics of the stunts and all. I even design my own stunts… which don’t always work out… but that’s why God invented band-aids, right?” Join Brian on his craziest day ever! Accused of a serious crime, he zips around the mean streets of his suburban middle school, staying one step ahead of the cops. On the day of the Xtreme Dream Games, will Brian be able to catch the real culprit and clear his name? If you like your middle grade fiction with a twist of James Bond, Zac Power and Secret Agent 6th Grader, you'll love 8th Grade Fugitive! From the writer of My Best Friend Is a Secret Agent, this mystery thriller chapter book is a fun adventure full of action and excitement for any reader - children, tweens, teens... and beyond! This funny who-done-it is the first in a series, so if you like it, there's more to come! (Don't forget to look for the surprise after Chapter 1!)

    this book is a magical journey through life from the beginnings of time to the birth of a child and the adventure that we take on our way to the grave and beyond to the starsit is a celebration of being human and all of the beautiful things that is in between.if you like books that are about:why we are herehow we are madebabies shedding their baby legs and growing their child legsthe innocence of childhoodthe warmth of papas backteen lifebody harethe first kissfalling in lovebeing alonethe gift of a feathertales of witchessaturday nightsmonday morningsthe mystery of old peoples earlobesdeathghostsand the meaning of lifethen this book is for youbecause inside of this book there is all of those things and after reading about 5 pages of it you will be the main expert of human life and there will be nothing in this world that you will not know love from your friend chris (simpsons artist) xox

    Putting surreal and witty twists on the everyday, Chris McQueer creates recognisable characters you will love and want to avoid like the plague.Peter’s earned his night off, and there’s not a bloody chance he’s covering Shelley’s shift. He just needs to find some pals for the perfect cover story. Deek is going to be at the forefront of the outsider art movement and do Banksy proud. Davie loves tattoos and his latest is going to be a masterpiece. Tam is one of the most creative minds in the galaxy (apparently), but creating parallel universes can cause problems. Everybody on Earth wakes up with their knees on backwards.He caught folks’ imagination on Medium with his stories, had rooms howling with laughter on the spoken word circuit, and now it’s time to put Chris McQueer on the page. Are you ready?

    The award-winning webcomic series comes to a close in this final laugh-filled, heart-rending installment.

    A date in suburbia has dramatic results. A seamstress takes revenge on an unsuspecting customer, while in France, a mother is promised 'fantastic news' - and lets her imagination run away with her. With each story, Jenny Eclair introduces a fascinating new character. And behind each woman lies a gripping tale - of betrayal, of love, of hope and defiance. Funny, heart-breaking, inspiring - and packed with wicked one liners - this wonderful collection shows Jenny Eclair's exceptional talent for observation at its very best.Based on the BBC Radio 4 series Little Lifetimes.

    It rings the cosmic gong on so many levels, turns so many stereotypes inside out, one scarcely knows what to do but hold on and enjoy the ride. And enjoy it I did." —TOM ROBBINSAcclaimed for his surreal, satirical vision and his “consistently dazzling” (Kirkus Reviews) writing style, cult favorite Tony Vigorito stretches the boundaries of storytelling beyond all limits with his long-awaited third novel. A quest to find the treasure of all treasures launches this swashbuckling tale of romance and high adventure across three centuries and takes you on a hilarious and visionary journey that includes lovers, pirates, bank robbers, treasure maps, yoga cults, love potions, assassins, con artists, quicksand, smugglers, and rock-paper-scissors. Welcome to the “incomparable imagination” (Minneapolis Books Examiner) of a Tony Vigorito novel. And beware the meadow of marvels... "A masterful story..." —Seattle Book Review"Opening with a satire of the Adam and Eve story, this book moves seamlessly back and forth between eighteenth century Caribbean pirates with a treasure map and twenty-first century San Franciscans contending with a false New Age prophet. The author controls these seemingly disparate scenarios with humor and panache, creating such memorable characters as a guardian parrot, a bumbling true believer, and a herd of cowbell-wearing bison somehow relocated to a tropical island. This is a deeply original and satisfying book." —BookLife

    but her plans change when the mischievous black tomcat Tai-chan enters the picture! Hey! Sue never signed up to be a catsitter! Sue and Tai-chan is the latest from the reigning meow-narch of cute kitty comics, Konami Kanata.

    One takes a lunch break in the carbon freezing chamber. Two underestimate a princess. One picks the wrong time to ask for a promotion. Another fails to show Jabba the proper respect. And one interrupts Lord Vader's private time, failing him for the last time. A lifelong Star Wars fan, Greg Stones brings a playful wit and sympathy for the plight of the troops as they meet their amusing ends, filling each colorfully painted scenario with fun Star Wars details and appearances by Han, Luke, Chewie, K-2SO, and many other characters. As the trooper count ticks down, how will the last one fare as he receives a very special assignment (on the Death Star)?© and TM Lucasfilm Ltd. Used Under Authorization

    It's the definitive edition to add to your library! For Better or For Worse is one of the most beloved comic strips of all time, with a devoted audience of more than 220 million. This new series, produced with Lynn Johnston's cooperation, collects three decades of comics in nine volumes.Since For Better or For Worse debuted in 1979, the world has watched the Patterson family grow up in real time--and to many readers, they feel like family! This premiere volume includes more than 1,200 sequential daily and Sunday comics--from the beginning! With all of the Sunday comics printed in their original color!This book is the perfect place to start for both long-time fans and new readers alike. Elizabeth grows from baby to toddler and learns how to talk, Michael goes to kindergarten and meets new friends, John juggles dentistry and diapers, while Elly manages the daily duties of being a dedicated mom, wife, and eventual student, as well as being a willing ear to her friends.Each volume also contains a number of annotations by Lynn Johnston detailing motivations for certain strips, funny anecdotes, observations about the reaction from fans, and much more!

    Then meet the grandmother who raised her. Foul-mouthed, outrageous, orange-haired Gina Pontin. Two women who couldn’t be more different. When Gina has an accident the two of them are forced together in the last place Stella wants to return to. But as the June temperature soars in more ways than one, they, and the residents of Mapton-on-Sea, are in for an explosive summer no one will ever forget. 'The Last Resort has laugh out loud moments, tenderness and real heartbreak. This is a story of family and friendships which, ultimately, is as warm as the golden sand we feel between our toes. Great stuff. ' LeftLion Magazine

     Champions of the Dragon is now a USA Today Bestseller &  2017 Readers' Favorite Bronze Medal Winner in the Fiction - Fantasy - General genre! Murland Kadabra has always dreamed of becoming a great wizard. However, at age 19, the young apprentice has yet to successfully cast a single spell. He has been reduced to grounds keeper of Abra Tower, and has become the laughing stock of the wizarding school. But when the Most High Wizard Kazimir chooses him to be one of the five Champions of the Dragon, Murland’s life changes forever.He soon finds himself traveling through the wilds with four unlikely companions, including an alcoholic knight, a gay elf prince, a dwarf with humanism, and an obese ogre. Prophecy dictates that these champions must march west to the shadowy peak of Bad Mountain, where they are destined to do battle with the dreaded dragon of legend, Drak’Noir.But what few people know, is that the prophecy is not altogether true. For it is not five champions who Kazimir chooses, but five fools. They are not meant to defeat the dragon, but to feed her. To change their fate, the Champions of the Dragon must not only overcome their enemies, but also themselves. Epic Fallacy is a satirical high-adventure romp through the Fantasy genre in the tradition of Terry Pratchett’s Discworld series. Included in this bundle are books 1-3: Champions of the Dragon, Beyond the Wide Wall, and The Legend of Drak’Noir. This collection is 899 pages and 380,000 words.

    The omniverses are under attack. And only one man has the chromosomes to make things right. Or does he? Filthy Frank begins life as the harmless creator of extinction level radioactive weapons, but is taken far into the deepest recesses of the omniverses to learn how everything came to be and how everything will be. If it were only that simple. He and his group of deviant disciples are chased from realm to realm by murderous chimpillas and treacherous peace lords, as he seeks to understand the dark secrets of the omniverses. An encounter with the Ultimate God might be his only chance, but Frank must first survive not only those who fight for evil but his own struggle for good as well. If only his chromosomes would stop multiplying...

    Now, away from home for the first time, the girls, along with their male hall-mates, Ed and McGraw, find that college is more than academia and bad microwavable meals. In the face of holiday balls, hometown rivals, “personal experimentation,” and regretful hookups, they may be lucky just to make it past their freshman year.Giant Days: Not On The Test Edition, written by John Allison (Bad Machinery, Scary Go Round) and illustrated by Disney artist Lissa Treiman and newcomer Max Sarin collects the first two volumes of the Eisner Award and Harvey Award-nominated series as well as issue one of the original webcomic in a deluxe hardcover.

    In an effort to understand it she invents a cartoon dog who follows her around, and two tiny game show hosts who live inside her head. Luckily, Rachael also has her real-life boyfriend and real-life cat to help her navigate her confused way through life.

     Really. I’m not. So why, you ask, do I have my eye pressed to the wall of my living room, spying on him through my own private glory hole? Have you seen Beckett Jameson? Glory Hole is book one of a four book series. It is the mostly complete tale of a couple, but I wouldn't consider it a stand alone. **Warning** If you read this in the presence of others, they may stare at you as you laugh, alot. Glory Hole is intended for mature audiences and people with a sense of humor only. It contains adult themes and situations which are expressed in a crude, hilarious way. 18+ Only Due To Adult Content

    Now she’s back − a return less anticipated than a Browns’ Super Bowl win − to help her mom out of a funk. Sam heard it was bad, but now Mom's blowing off bingo? Sam begins to suspect that her mom’s depression may not be all it appears, but she gets side-tracked when her investigator brother Paul tosses her into a case. They’re on the hunt for a client’s missing wife, Tracy. Sam discovers she has an old connection to Tracy, but will that help Sam find her, or will it land her in a trap she can’t escape? Shadowing Sam in her hunt is Johnny Rosato, a warmer complication from her past. Sam's emotions are mixed, but her lower half has a strong opinion. An ancient and unfinished crush, a secretive mother, an aiding and abetting best friend, a hot cop, a salacious uncle, and a living garden gnome all compete to distract Sam as she stumbles down a distorted path. Can she find Tracy? And will childhood ties suck her back in for good?

    Illustrated with adorable, adorkable unicorns, each spread comes with a funny or inspiring quote reminding you to follow your dreams, and always think unicorn.Perfect for giving an inspiring boost to your day, or as a cheering up gift for a friend who needs a little more unicorn in their life, this cute and covetable little book is bound to spread smiles wherever it goes.

     “Absolutely hilarious! One of the funniest books of the year.” The Guardian “Guaranteed to leave you in stitches.” The Boston Globe “I once stabbed a stripper in the car park of Paradise City Gentlemen’s Club. Her body is buried in a field at coordinates 38°51'40.1"N 78°51'41.2"W.” JM, senior citizen

    Someone is manipulating Shirtless...and only by confronting the demons of his past can Shirtless hope to save his future!A heart-filled, hilarious, tall tale for the ages...you don't want to miss SHIRTLESS BEAR-FIGHTER!Collecting SHIRTLESS BEAR-FIGHTER! #1-5"

    They call him – the tech with the torso....”A woman screamed in the back.“.... They say he knows a million ways to pleasure you....”Whoops and hollers started from a massive crowd of ladies in the front.“.... oh you know where I'm going with this don’t you ladies?”Yeses and shouts of joy were echoing around the club as ladies everywhere started chanting. “That’s right ladies, hold onto your bras. For one night only and back by popular demand, we bring you.... From Dork to Dirty!” I’m Jasmine Cooper. Executive Head of Marketing for a leading Advertising Agency. I work hard and I’m always completely in control of my universe. Until the devil herself persuaded me to go to ladies night...Who would've thought a sensible level-headed woman would let a stripper take her home, ravish her body, and turn her into a gibbering wreck? Certainly not me!A stripper, how cliché... and how embarrassing! Thank heavens nobody else knows how dirty and debased he made me. No one would suspect the unspeakable things I did with a man in a mask! And that's just fine, I can put it behind me as a moment of madness. Until the tech geek from IT walked into my office and I completely lost all my composure. It couldn’t be him - could it?This is a standalone short novel at 55,000 words Warning - contains explicit language and adult scenes

    Everyone is doing it now.Disarmed of falsehood, he was left only with the awful truth: John Hodgman is an older white male monster with bad facial hair, wandering like a privileged Sasquatch through three wildernesses: the hills of Western Massachusetts where he spent much of his youth; the painful beaches of Maine that want to kill him (and some day will); and the metaphoric haunted forest of middle age that connects them.Vacationland collects these real life wanderings, and through them you learn of the horror of freshwater clams, the evolutionary purpose of the mustache, and which animals to keep as pets and which to kill with traps and poison. There is also some advice on how to react when the people of coastal Maine try to sacrifice you to their strange god.Though wildly, Hodgmaniacally funny as usual, it is also a poignant and sincere account of one human facing his forties, those years when men in particular must stop pretending to be the children of bright potential they were and settle into the failing bodies of the wiser, weird dads that they are.

    Caught in the crossfire are his teenage granddaughter Summer, his veterinary surgeon daughter Beth, and his hapless son-in-law Jerry. This collection includes issues #11-20 of the comic book series, featuring the superstar talents of Tom Fowler, Kyle Starks, Pamela Ribon, CJ Cannon, Marc Ellbery, and more! Stories like "Ready Player Morty" and "Rick Burn, Dude" will make you laugh, cry, and probably question the morality of humanity. This special hardcover edition also includes a brand-new introduction, over twenty pages of extra art, and an exclusive sound clip of Rick and Morty!

    DINGY TV STUDIO - BACKSTAGEUramichi is a 31-year-old host on a kids' show who leads exercise routines and teaches life lessons colored by one main theme: Adulthood sucks. Alongside mascots played by a couple of bushy-tailed twentysomethings and a singing duo whose music embodies the notion of being kicked while you're down, URAMICHI wades through the misery of working life, one sardonic comment at a time...1.2 CUT TO: THE JADED COMEDY THAT INSPIRED THE ANIME

    We also provide at least one important chart for each branch of science.

    In Dr. First, join the First Doctor and Susan on a new adventure, in which they encounter the dastardly Cybermen once more . . .

    Late great comedians Robin Williams, Charlie Murphy, Joan Rivers, Greg Giraldo, Don Rickles are turning over in their graves with a thorn in their side. Take my word: Share & salvage the little wit being reserved by the only true /real comedian to have ever graced the stage. Otherwise you ought'a be ashamed of yourselves!

    Not as much, but the heat still rises when I stop to think about what I’m saying. Yes, this is my new life and I have to find the confidence to live it like I own it. I knew allowing her to walk away that night was a mistake… Now I have to find a way to show that I truly care about her, and maybe then she’ll understand that I can’t live my life without her. The problem is she only wants to be friends, if that’s the only way I get her then it’ll have to be enough.

    Coworkers pool hop after dark. A call centre employee scrambles to keep their shitty job. Sweetheart tries something new in order to pay rent. A group of friends get stoned and go to the movies. Did you hear about the drag BBQ on Saturday? Everyone's going to be there, and everyone's going to bring an amazing look.Set in the twin backdrops of Toronto and Montreal, Our Lady of Perpetual Realness & Other Stories is a glimpse into the lives of contemporary queer youth. Equal parts wry and tender, these six stories follow young, gay men of colour through the confusing, bleak, and often humorous aspects of their day-to-day lives as they struggle to discover the world and their place within it.

     "I was hooked by the first page, and I didn't want to put the book down. The book was so good that I was sad to reach the end." Readers' Favorite 5★ review 15-year-old Marty Gundy has a dream: He wants to become an internet ultra-billionaire. And when his latest killer app, the ‘Future Fixer’, actually shows him five seconds of his very near future, he knows his dream will come true! But that five seconds is just enough to get him into big trouble, and it soon puts him at the business end of the school bully’s fist! Will Marty’s killer app end up killing him? If you like your Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Zac Power books with a twist of technology, you’ll love The F.L.U.B. Club! From the writer of My Best Friend Is a Secret Agent, this middle grade chapter book takes kids’ Silicon Valley dreams and gives them a magical twist. It’s a suspenseful ride for children, tweens and teens! This high school story is the first in a series, so if you like it, there's more to come! (Don't forget to look for the surprise after Chapter 1!)

    What doesn’t he get? Just about everything. That’s why he walks around with a little camera attached to his glasses that records his entire life. Then he watches it all later to try to figure out the things he didn’t get before – which, as you’ll recall, is just about everything – and he makes a weekly video blog for all to see. Unfortunately, Hugh’s cluelessness leads him to run for Student Council President. Even his little sister knows that this school election thing is just “not him”, but Hugh, as always, has to find out the hard way. At least Hugh’s campaign gets him the attention of the very confident, very pretty – and very intimidating – Molly MacLaine. But will Molly be able to help Hugh survive his disastrous campaign, or will he crash and burn… and bring the whole school down with him? If you like the Middle School series and Diary of a Wimpy Kid, you’ll love HughTube. This book is for anybody who’s ever been baffled by the secrets, contradictions and unwritten rules of middle school. Tweens and teens will easily relate to the comic mishaps of our hapless hero. This funny coming of age, middle grade story is the first in a series, so if you like it, there's more to come! Don't forget to look for the surprise after Chapter 1!

    But if I follow my lust… Will she steal my heart? I’m not just king of Wall Street. I’m the most notorious bad boy on Broadway. Wealth. Power. Success. I’ve got it all. Women crumble for my wit, charm and my rock hard…abs. I change women faster than I change my underwear. Now my business partners sisters in town. Smart. Gorgeous. And mind-bendingly sexy. I can’t resist. What I didn’t count on? I think I’ve just met my match. She chews guys up and spits them out. A shark just like me --we’re two of a kind. Her brother says she’s off limits. But that just makes her a whole lot sexier. And tonight she wants me to take her all the way. Tonight it’s my turn. I want to claim the girl who can’t be tamed for myself. One night of wild sex later -- could this be a New York dream come true, or the greatest disaster ever?

    Both are pretty easy to put off as they're very expensive and tend to wreck your house.' Stand-up comedian Sam Avery (aka the Learner Parent) started his award-winning blog when his twin boys were born. A million nappies, Peppa Pig episodes and a lot less sleep later, he shares all the lows, highs and hilarious in-betweens of his experiences of first-time parenthood in this, his highly anticipated first book. Sam's honest, messy and laugh-out-loud account of trying for a baby (which transpired to be babIES) and figuring out what to do with them once they arrived - right up to the toddler years of talking, walking and tantrum-ing - will have you crying with laughter between your own nappy changes and nursery runs.

    “The goal of this book is to teach kids (and remind the rest of us) that losing is only losing if you give up.”

    Join Phoebe and Her Unicorn for puzzles and games fun!Phoebe and her unicorn, Marigold Heavenly Nostrils, bring you hours of challenging crossword, wordsearch, and sudoku puzzles, along with mazes and word games.

    He wanted to be dead. But Jon wakes up in the far future with an alien burrowing in his chest for salvage. Someone was going to pay for this. Check that. Lots of people were going to pay for this. Jon was the first astronaut to download to an android host to find the population of doomed Earth a new home. But that was so long time ago. He is now literally lost in time. The far flung future is dominated by an unstoppable species, the Adamant. They have conquered most of the galaxy. No civilization has successfully resisted them. Brutally efficient, selflessly devoted to their empire, and callous to all other forms of life, the Adamant have advanced without boundaries. But they are about to run into a major problem. One very pissed off Jon Ryan stands in their way. He escapes their prison ship, rescues two teenage shapeshifters, and intends to protect them at all costs. Jon, Mirraya, and Slapgren race across the galaxy always just one step ahead of disaster. But the combined evil forces that pursue them tear the trio apart. The teens must fend on their own in a hostile universe. All the while, Jon runs for his life, hoping against all hope to locate the teens. In a galaxy burning with war, genocide, and hidden magic, can Jon Ryan pull of one more miracle?

    But she SO can.

    Or maybe it was a little more complicated than that. Nick Page brings his skills as an unlicensed historian to bear on this key period in European (and world) history in order to uncover everything you need to know about the Reformation - with a fair few bits you never wanted to know thrown in for good measure.Historians tell us that the Protestant Reformation laid the foundations for the Industrial Revolution, religious freedom, and all sorts of other Good Things. But what actually happened? Who were the winners and the losers, the ogres and the beauty queens of this key moment in church history? (spoiler: there weren't any beauty queens)In-depth research, historical analysis and cutting-edge guesswork combine to scintillating effect in this fast-moving examination of the strange and wonderful whirlwind that was church life in late medieval Europe.'You were predestined to read this.' John Calvin

    It is highly recommended that you read "Gum" first.~WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU HUNGRIER.Rika's father, Chef Diego Martín, has finally been able to return to Los Angeles after 15 years, brought over to work in the VIP Center restaurant of the Temple of Microtology by its founders. But, a month later, his sous chef is found dead, and Diego is missing. Rika is panicked at the thought of losing her one living parent permanently. All she knows is that she has to find her father, and she needs Nick Owen by her side.Not one night passed in the last six months that Nick hasn't lain awake thinking of Rika, even though he's given up hope she'll contact him. It's for the best, anyway. He sent her away last summer because he wasn't right for her. But when she calls and asks him to fly to L.A., nothing can stop him from racing to her side.However, he may not be prepared for what he discovers in her hometown, like Rika's formidable grandmother who treats him like a molester, the fact that L.A. men find him really, really attractive, or the weird Hollywood cult members who are spying on him and Rika. Oh, and maybe worst of all--LeeAnne. Nick never wants to see tears in Paprika's beautiful eyes again. But is there really a chance of finding her father alive and solving the murder before the Microtologists get Rika, too?Read Dead Men Don't Eat Quiche now and find out! -Next book: Dead Men Don't Flip. To get book release notifications, have the opportunity to become a beta reader or read and reviewer, and other fun stuff, join Nina's reader group  at the NinaCordoba website.

    This is the third book in Jen Mann's New York Times best-selling People I Want to Punch in the Throat series and it will not disappoint! This is the book you'll want to accidentally on purpose leave on the desk of that blowhard in marketing. This is the book you'll just happen to drop next the microwave in the break room hoping that Jan in accounting reads it before she reheats last night's smelly leftovers for lunch. This is the book you'll mail anonymously to your micromanaging boss with certain passages highlighted.The Punch List:Company-wide happy hours. I barely want to work with you. I definitely don't want to have a beer with you.The Ivy Leaguers. You do know every sentence doesn't have to start with, “When I was at Princeton…”?The martyrs. You get sick days—use one. Stop dragging your sniffling, snorting, coughing, sneezing ass to work and infecting the rest of us. You're not that important.Advance Praise for Working with People I Want to Punch in the Throat:“I’m grateful to all of the people Jen Mann writes about in this book—the condescending managers, undermining editors, the plastic surgeon who helpfully offered free operations during a job interview, and the boss who fired her with a Post-It Note—because they made her into the rage-filled writer we all know and love.” - Jancee Dunn, author of How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids“I connected with Jen Mann’s book more deeply than I’m comfortable with. It was brilliant and gross and hilarious and heartwarming and then hilarious again. I literally couldn’t put it down. For what it’s worth, the only book before this one that I read in one sitting without a break was Dances with Wolves. Don’t judge me.” - James Breakwell (@XplodingUnicorn), author of Only Dead on the Inside: A Parent’s Guide to the Zombie Apocalypse

    Her multigenerational saga is also a microcosm of China's turbulent, transformative history from imperialism, nationalism, and communism, through to its present role as an economic superpower, captured from the unique perspective of a Chinese Christian family. When, in 1979, Jennifer Lin accompanied her father back to China for the first time in thirty years, it was like stepping into the last page of a mystery without having read any of the book. Her relatives were thrilled to be reunited with their long-lost family, but too stoic and often too frightened to stir up stories from a painful, politically dangerous past. Jennifer, however, was determined to find out what had gone before and in the course of a career that afforded her a deep engagement with China and equipped her with the skills and doggedness to unearth even the most carefully buried truths, she has pieced together an extraordinary tale. Moreover, she discovered that the saga of her family is, as she writes, "the very story of China, one that captures the collision of religion and politics that began more than a century ago and continues to this day."

    How, you may ask, could these marvellous works ever be improved upon?Reader, ask no more...for we present Pugs & PrejudiceMrs Bennet has five unmarried daughters, living in a house that can only be inherited by a male heir. The Bennet litter must be married off soon - but to whom?Adorable Mr Bingley seems like a perfect match for beautiful and sweetly tempered Jane Bennet; and perhaps his dashing but aloof companion Mr Darcy might be just right for her witty sister Elizabeth?Or perhaps not...This book has everything you adored about Jane Austen's classic novel - the wit, the warmth, the love story - with everything the original lacked - namely, a colourful cast of adorable pugs dressed head to paw in Georgian clothing.Turns out Mr Darcy is even more lovable with a fuzzy muzzle.

    Please note this book only contains two words and is entirely satire.

    Whether it’s a Colombian drug lord or a hot piece of a$$, nothing will stop me from nailing my target.As an international vigilante, I’ve been forced to live by a few hard and fast rules. Number 1 being that I don’t allow myself to be tied down to anything–or anyone–but when I finally decided to fly home and see my family for the first time in 10 years, all hell broke loose.Little did I know I’d be running into Sarah, the very girl who’d been begging to ride this c*ck all those years ago. She was just jailbait back then, but now, she’s all grown up.Unfortunately, I’ve uncovered some dark secrets about her family that would turn her entire world upside down. She doesn’t know she’s in serious danger, but if I can keep my d*ck in my pants long enough to find who’s after her, I just might be able to save her life.STRIPPED DOWNI get filthy working on cars by day. By night, I get dirty in an entirely different way.I started dancing ‘cause I need extra money to pay my mom’s medical bills. Ladies throw themselves–and their cash–at me, and my bed’s never empty.I had it all figured out…that is, until Marty f*cking Leoni, my #1 high school piece, showed up with a bachelorette party one night.She’s rounded out into a hot young thing whose long legs and wicked curves are enough to make any man beg for mercy.I thought I’d have a little fun and invite her out back for a private dance. Little did I know it would be the spark that reignited the fire that once raged between us–as much as she tries to fight it.It’s been ten years since we parted ways, so why the f*ck can’t I let her go? Hell if I know, but I won’t stop until she’s mine again.

    Oscar Orcus is considered a third-rate Synergist by most people. He spends his days peacefully, working so he can send money back to an orphanage. All that changes when the whirlwind that is Miledi Reisen storms into his life. Miledi sees the hidden potential in Oscar, and invites him on her journey to defeat the gods. Oscar wants no part of any journey, and he refuses. But Miledi is persistent, and the situation changes drastically when the orphanage he wants to protect is attacked. In the end, what will our unlikely hero decide?

    But this angel doesn’t come with fluffy wings. She wants to get tooled up and hit the streets.But Jack doesn’t want her to go around murdering his enemies. (The last thing he needs is a turf war). The project he has in mind requires a delicate approach …You see, Jack has received a letter from an old girlfriend saying he has a son, Nicholas. This is fantastic news, but there’s a problem. Nicholas is a wimp, bullied by his girlfriend and bullied by, well, everyone. Can Zenka make him into the sort of son any self-respecting villain would be proud of? Zenka takes up the challenge. “Don’t vorry, Jack. Ven I am finished vith Nicholas he vill be dog’s bollocks just like his papa.” She grabs a gun and musters the mob.Nicholas plans to marry Penelope and settle in suburbia. He leads a tranquil, if uneventful, life. That is, until he falls in love with a mysterious Hungarian girl who begs him to protect her. Protect her?! He's qualified to nurse the elderly handicapped - not attack lantern-jawed thugs in leather jackets.Frustrated by his cowardice, Zenka turns up the heat. Her tactics become more bizarre, more illegal, and soon events begin to spin out of control.Meanwhile, Jack's accountant believes the letter is a lie and investigates.Which is when the secrets come out - and now someone is going to pay with their life …"I was laughing one minute and then holding my breath, afraid of what was coming" -Susan Loves to Read

    Abbott Emma Louise Fallon, aka Elf, has two wishes for Christmas. Having spent the last few months bragging about her latest boyfriend, who's turned out to be a womanizing cheat, one, she needs to escape her well-meaning family, and, two, she needs to avoid all men while she's in a man-hating mode.But stranded in a cold isolated cabin, when her girlfriend is forced to bail out on their vacation plans, Elf makes one more desperate wish: Can she please learn how to build a fire before she freezes to death?The solo rustic life is becoming all too much for her. She's convinced that a stray cat, who has decided to keep her company, has magical powers, that the local shop owners are secretly Mr. and Mrs. Claus, and nothing can stop her from laughing when the hot local Martian -come cop - come veterinarian - introduces himself as Rudi. Will Elf need to break her rule about staying away from men, and rely on this hunk for helping her start a fire? Or, worse, yet, will she be able to control the fire that Rudi's ignited in her?This story remained #1 for 6 consecutive weeks December 2016/January 2017 and was a #1 INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLER as part of the Mistletoe Kisses & Christmas Wishes set.

    Worse still, her ex just got engaged. Doesn’t she deserve some romance, too? Or, at least a date for the Fur Ball. She’s always enjoyed the annual pet rescue gala, but this year her ex will be there with his fiancée. Meanwhile, Cara hasn’t met anyone— other than the irresistible dogs at the boutique’s adoption events.Cara is shocked when her wish to fall for a man as easily as she does for those mutts summons Vincent. His velour track suit, paunchy belly, and tough-guy accent don't exactly fit her childhood image of a fairy godfather. Not exactly on top of his game, he admits to being twenty-five years late. (Her daughter Winnie is convinced he must be there for her!) Vincent does his best and casts a spell "guaranteed" to help Cara find the One. But when she actually starts meeting men, none of them are her type. If only they were as perfect for her as the dogs they adopt. Did her screw-up fairy godfather botch the spell? If so, what will it mean not only for Cara but Vincent as well?From USA Today best-selling author Jackie Bouchard, comes a tale of love, laughter, and the profound magic of believing in yourself.

    Men have been tickling children for generations with their funny and charming antics. The Mr Men for Grown-Ups series now gives adults the chance to laugh along as the Mr Men and Little Miss try to cope with the very grown-up world around them. Featuring Roger Hargreaves classic artwork alongside hilariously funny new text.Little Miss Busy hadn't always been so busy. She used to enjoy lazy weekends and leisurely lie-ins. But then she had kids. Now her life is a constant juggle of demands and pressure to be the perfect mum. How does Little Miss Busy do it?The perfect book for anyone who has ever faced the trials and tribulations of the wonderful and exasperating world of parenthood.Also available The Mr Men for Grown-Ups series:Mr Greedy Eats Clean to Get Lean, Little Miss Shy Goes Online Dating and Mr Happy and the Office Party.

    A war that involves goats, phallic chandeliers, stolen kisses in the rain, strawgasms, and eating out on the kitchen counter. A war that could damn well involve two hearts and a plan. Her plan doesn’t involve falling in love. His life doesn’t involve plans. This could be a problem.

    Now, I can add Margaret Lashley to that very short list." “Her characters are lovable and believable and you cheer, and cry, along with them.” “I found myself deeply immersed in Val’s journey and laughing out loud.” “If you enjoy Janet Evanovich, you’ll love Margaret Lashley!” “From the first page to the last, I was captivated.” “The characters are great – so many laugh out loud moments…” “Hilarious! I can completely relate to Val.” “Made me laugh, made me cry…. Couldn’t stop reading it.” "Margaret writes with a "smirk" of a Cheshire cat. Fantastic read.” If you like deeply flawed characters and laugh-out-loud situations, you’ll love Margaret Lashley’s hilarious Val Fremden Mystery Series. Why did you decide to write women’s fiction? I grew up in an era of strong women role models, such as Marlo Thomas in That Girl, as well as Mary Tyler Moore and Carol Burnett in shows that bore their names. These women were pursuing their own dreams, their own ways. I didn’t see much of that in fiction today. I wanted to create a character that was strong, yet vulnerable. One that celebrated the everyday, self-made woman who was struggling to finally put her own needs first. My main character, Val, is a survivor who bears the scars of her hard journey proudly, and with her own quirky coping mechanisms and sense of humor. Where did you get the idea for the Val & Pals Series? Real life was my inspiration. Today’s society makes it hard for a woman to be less than beautiful and perfect and subservient. I wanted to explore the idea of a woman who decided to lay down her tiara and mirror and scorecard and begin to play by her own rules. This type of freedom costs her dearly in many ways, but would it be worth it? That’s what this series explores with tears and triumphs and a barrel full of laughs. What type of reader would enjoy your brand of women’s fiction? Readers who like to be taken by surprise – who like to laugh and cry and dissolve into another world when they read. My characters have their great triumphs and cringe-worthy failures. They are flawed and vulnerable and funny as hell. My stories draw laughs using a wide net – from Pat Conroy’s twisted, dark family humor to Bridget Jones’s slap-stick situational gaffs. Things don’t always turn out like they planned. But that’s life – when it’s truly lived.

    Did I mention that this person disrupting our lives looks like a sex god and wants to arrest my grandmother? ♥♥♥Delving into the world of magic, Apple stumbles her way through spells, prophecies, and a new fiancé. Filled with humor, and plenty of heat between the sheets, Applebottom Magic is perfect for putting a smile on your face.

    Fluoride and vitamins to sustain the health of the human race. Added ingredients to extend and elevate the quality of life. All good things, right? Wrong. Thia Kelly has been changed by the TS901 chemical in the world’s water supply. Now, forced into hiding with the other inflicted outcasts, she struggles to survive as her powers emerge. Evan Daniels hunted for others like himself, and finding Thia suddenly brought meaning back into his life. Love blossomed between the strange couple while they searched for a way to reverse the effects. Unfortunately, the Government had something else in mind. Super-soldier creation on a mass scale was their end goal, and thanks to an unfortunate family tie, Evan became Patient #1. Good-guy? Bad-guy? The world isn’t sure, but Thia is left with only one choice––save the ass of the world’s first Anomaly who just happens to be her boyfriend.

     Marcy has never been in love. But when Oliver Dawson walks into her store, she falls head over heels. Unable to shake the feeling that she and Oliver were made for each other, for the first time in her life, the quirky witch considers casting a love spell for herself. Oliver’s life is turned upside down when he’s shot and almost killed. Even though events haven’t been kind to the sexy police detective, he’s determined to make the best of his situation. But still, nothing could have prepared him for feisty Marcy breaking down his defenses, nor the healing tea that leaves him gagging. Unconventional and hell-bent on getting her man, the little witch soon weaves her magic and captures his heart. He’s more than willing to give it to her, but when faced with his painful and turbulent past, neither are sure they’ll get their happily ever after.

    You will probably wish you still didn’t.YouTube sensation Stuart Ashen is back with his second instalment of terrible old computer games you’ve probably never heard of... because what the world needs right now is to know exactly how bad Domain of the Undead for the Atari 8-bit computers was.Attack of the Flickering Skeletons is even bigger than the original Terrible Old Games You’ve Probably Never Heard Of – this second excavation of gaming’s buried past will not only unearth more appalling excuses for digital entertainment, but also feature guest contributors and several special interest chapters not based around single specific games.These are NOT the games you’ve heard of a million times in YouTube videos. This is a compilation of truly obscure and dreadful games. Dripping with wry humour and featuring the best, worst graphics from the games themselves, this book encapsulates the atrocities produced in the days of tight budgets and low quality controls.These are even more appalling games that leaked from the industry’s tear ducts, taken down from the dusty shelves of history by the man who has somehow made a living by sticking rubbish on a sofa and talking about it.

    She goes to art school, she talks to friends, she has a cat, sometimes she plays brännboll. This doesn’t sound fun? Well it is, we bet you will probably laugh out loud and love it. Anna is one of PEOW Studio's favorite funny comic person and she could be yours, too.

    That is, until he finds himself summoned by the Blue Demon King to a fantasy world-just like his favorite RPG games! Except this Demon King is pathetically begging at his feet, lamenting the arrival of some "heroes"...who apparently, have infinite lives and respawn over and over again?!Unlike his hysterical summoner, Shinichi coolly takes on the challenge of fending off these pesky heroes, literally shaking hands with the devil. But the demon clan is about to find out that his twisted mind is darker than the worst of them!