The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize It and How to Respond


Patricia Evans - 1992
    You'll get more of the answers you need to recognize abuse when it happens, respond to abusers safely and appropriately, and most important, lead a happier, healthier life.In two all-new chapters, Evans reveals the Outside Stresses driving the rise in verbal abuse--and shows you how you can mitigate the devastating effects on your relationships. She also outlines the Levels of Abuse that characterize this kind of behavior--from subtle, insidious put-downs that can erode your self-esteem to full-out tantrums of name-calling, screaming, and threatening that can escalate into physical abuse.Drawing from hundreds of real situations suffered by real people just like you, Evans offers strategies, sample scripts, and action plans designed to help you deal with the abuse--and the abuser.This timely new edition of The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Expanded Third Edition puts you on the road to recognizing and responding to verbal abuse, one crucial step at a time!

Wired for Love: How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship


Stan Tatkin - 2012
    Every person is wired for love differently, with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and rituals, making it possible to actually neurologically prime the brain for greater love and fewer conflicts.Wired for Love is a complete insider’s guide to understanding your partner’s brain and enjoying a romantic relationship built on love and trust. Synthesizing research findings on how and why love lasts drawn from neuroscience, attachment theory, and emotion regulation, this book presents ten guiding principles that can improve any relationship.Strengthen your relationship by:Creating and maintaining a safe “couple bubble” Using morning and evening rituals to stay connected Learning to fight so that nobody loses Becoming the expert on what makes your partner feel loved By learning to use simple gestures and words, readers can learn to put out emotional fires and help their partners feel more safe and secure. The no-fault view of conflict in this book encourages readers to move past a "warring brain" mentality and toward a more cooperative "loving brain" understanding of the relationship. This book is essential reading for couples and others interested in understanding the complex dynamics at work behind love and trust in intimate relationships.While there’s no doubt that love is an inexact science, if you can discover how you and your partner are wired differently, you can overcome your differences to create a lasting intimate connection.

Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages


Robin L. Smith - 2006
    Robin Smith reveals how to turn vows made at the altar into realistic plans for a long and happy marriage. Dr. Robin Smith advises couples on how to take the wedding vows that were made in earnest and in innocence, to a level where they can be used to build a happy, healthy, satisfying and long-lasting marriage. Lies at the Altar is for couples who are planning marriage, are newly married, or who have been married for years. In Lies at the Altar: The Truth About Great Marriages, Dr. Robin Smith addresses the unspoken needs, unasked questions, outrageous expectations, and hidden agendas that often linger beneath the surface of the wedding vows and appear later to cause power struggles, suffering, and feelings of hopelessness in marriages. Dr. Smith discusses why it's important to have one's "eyes wide open" in a marriage; how to write true vows to live by; and why it's never too late to rewrite your vows. She illustrates her advice with detailed stories from her own life, as well as from couples that she has counseled. And in her inspiring conclusion, she invites couples to light up their lives by acknowledging each other as individuals, each of whom lights a candle, and who lights a third candle which represents "us". Calling "truth" the secret ingredient of great marriages, Dr. Smith teaches individuals and couples how to find the truth within themselves and their partners, whether they are heading to the altar, suffering in an unhappy marriage, divorced, or simply want to bring more satisfaction and intimacy into their relationship.

For Men Only: A Straightforward Guide to the Inner Lives of Women


Shaunti Feldhahn - 2006
    Through hundreds of interviews and the results of a scientific national survey of women, this book demonstrates that women are actually not random and that they really can be systematized and "mapped." In fact, much to men's delight, this book shows that women are actually quite easy to understand and please--as long as you know what it is they need. This simple map will guide you to loving your wife or girlfriend in the way she needs to be loved. The bestselling author of "For Women Only"teams with her husband to offer men the key to unlocking the mysterious ways of women. Through Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn 's national scientific survey and hundreds of interviews, "For Men Only" reveals what you can do today to improve your relationship. And believe it or not, as Jeff assures men, "It's not splitting the atom." And for every guy who rarely reads a manual: Quick-Start Guide Included! "When we featured Shaunti's book "For Women Only" on "FamilyLife Today," ""the phone rang off the hook! When Shaunti and Jeff come back on our broadcast, I'm buying some more phones. This is fresh and relevant--good stuff for every marriage. Read it!" "-Dennis Rainey, President, FamilyLife "Story Behind the Book "As I was writing "For Women Only "to help women understand the inner lives of men, over and over I heard that men wished there was a way to understand their wives, but they felt it was probably impossible. I heard from them, 'You are writing this little slim volume about men, but if it was about understanding women, it would have to be the size of an encyclopedia! Women are random and complicated!' These men were surprised and encouraged when I assured them that women are neither random nor complicated, and we can be understood. Men just want to love their wives well, and "For Men Only "will help them do that." "--Shaunti Feldhahn"

Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough


Lori Gottlieb - 2010
    So what if you haven't found The One just yet. Surely he'll come along, right? But what if he doesn't? Or even worse, what if he already has, but you just didn't realize it? Suddenly finding herself forty and single, Lori Gottlieb said the unthinkable in her March 2008 article in "The Atlantic" Maybe she and single women everywhere, needed to stop chasing the elusive Prince Charming and instead go for Mr. Good Enough. Looking at her friends' happy marriages to good enough guys who happen to be excellent husbands and fathers, Gottlieb declared it time to reevaluate what we really need in a partner. Her ideas created a firestorm of controversy from outlets like the "Today" show to "The Washington Post," which wrote, "Given the perennial shortage of perfect men, Gottlieb's probably got a point," to "Newsweek" and NPR, which declared, "Lori Gottlieb didn't want to take her mother's advice to be less picky, but now that she's turned forty, she wonders if her mother is right." Women all over the world were talking. But while many people agreed that they should have more realistic expectations, what did that actually mean out in the real world, where Gottlieb and women like her were inexorably drawn to their "type"? That's where "Marry Him" comes in. By looking at everything from culture to biology, in "Marry Him" Gottlieb frankly explores the dilemma that so many women today seem to face--how to reconcile the strong desire for a husband and family with a list of must-haves so long and complicated that many great guys get rejected out of the gate. Here Gottlieb shares her own journey in the quest for romantic fulfillment, and in the process gets wise guidance and surprising insights from marital researchers, matchmakers, dating coaches, behavioral economists, neuropsychologists, sociologists, couples therapists, divorce lawyers, and clergy--as well as single and married men and women, ranging in age from their twenties to their sixties. "Marry Him" is an eye-opening, often funny, sometimes painful, and always truthful in-depth examination of the modern dating landscape, and ultimately, a provocative wake-up call about getting real about Mr. Right.

Meeting Your Half-Orange: An Utterly Upbeat Guide to Using Dating Optimism to Find Your Perfect Match


Amy Spencer - 2009
    What if you heard he or she would be coming along soon? Would you be relieved? Excited? Happy? Well those are the feelings that dating optimism can give you. Rather than admonishing readers to make themselves more available, or turn dating into a full-time job, Spencer's program of dating optimism is a fun, results-oriented way to find a healthy happy relationship, based on brain science and psychology that can help you become a more positive dater. She'll guide you through sowing the orange seed of your ideal relationship and growing it to "fruit-ion." In essence, by focusing positively about dating, you can actually change your brain, which changes everything from your body language to the way you perceive others and what you ultimately attract. Meeting Your Half-Orange is the pep talk that puts finding true love back into your own hands. It will guide you toward becoming so focused on the relationship you want and so happy in your own skin, the right person will be naturally drawn straight to you. You've never read a dating guide like this before. But best of all, it will be the last one you'll ever need.

The Highly Sensitive Person in Love: Understanding and Managing Relationships When the World Overwhelms You


Elaine N. Aron - 1996
    And, if you are one of the 20 percent of people who are born highly sensitive, the risk of an unhappy relationship is especially high. Your finely tuned nervous system, which picks up on subtleties and reflects deeply, would be a romantic asset if both you and your partner understood you better. But without that understanding, your sensitivity is likely to be making your close relationships painful and complicated.Based on Elaine N. Aron’s groundbreaking research on temperament and intimacy, The Highly Sensitive Person in Love offers practical help for highly sensitive people seeking happier, healthier romantic relationships. From low-stress fighting to sensitive sexuality, the book offers a wealth of practical advice on making the most of all personality combinations. Complete with illuminating self-tests and the results of the first survey ever done on sex and temperament, The Highly Sensitive Person in Love will help you discover a better way of living and loving.

The Hard Questions: 100 Essential Questions to Ask the One You Love


Susan Piver - 2000
    The Hard Questions is a simple yet profound tool that will challenge and inspire couples to gain a deeper understanding of each other a build a lasting, intimate relationship.

Why Men Love Bitches


Sherry Argov - 2002
    With saucy detail on every page, this no-nonsense guide reveals why a strong woman is much more desirable than a "yes woman" who routinely sacrifices herself. The author provides compelling answers to the tough questions women often ask: · Why are men so romantic in the beginning and why do they change? · Why do men take nice girls for granted? · Why does a man respect a woman when she stands up for herself? Full of advice, hilarious real-life relationship scenarios, "she says/he thinks" tables, and the author's unique "Attraction Principles," Why Men Love Bitches gives you bottom-line answers. It helps you know who you are, stand your ground, and relate to men on a whole new level. Once you've discovered the feisty attitude men find so magnetic, you'll not only increase the romantic chemistry—you'll gain your man's love and respect with far less effort.

Boundaries in Dating


Henry Cloud - 1999
    Meeting people is just the first step. Once you've met someone, then what? Should you move on, pursue a simple friendship, or more? How do you set smart limits on your physical relationship? How much do you get involved financially? And how do you know if you've found your future spouse?In Boundaries in Dating, Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend, counselors and authors of the New York Times bestseller?Boundaries, answer all of these questions and more. Helping you bridge the pitfalls of dating, Drs. Cloud and Townsend share their practical advice for adding healthy boundaries to your dating life.Boundaries in Dating unfolds a wise, biblical path to developing self-control, freedom, and intimacy. Let Drs. Cloud and Townsend help you get to know yourself, solve problems, and enjoy the journey of dating and finding your life partner.Full of insightful, real-life examples, this much-needed book will give you the tools you need to:Recognize and choose quality over perfection in a dating partnerPrioritize friendship within your relationshipPreserve friendships by separating between platonic relationships and romantic interestMove past denial to handle real relational problems in a realistic and hopeful wayEnjoy this season of lifeDon't forget to check out the?Boundaries?collection of books and workbooks dedicated to key areas of your life, including dating, marriage, parenting kids, raising teenagers, and leadership.

She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman


Ian Kerner - 2004
    The New York Times praises Kerner’s “cool sense of humor and an obsessive desire to inform,” as he “encourages men through an act that many find mystifying.” An indispensable aid to a healthier, more fulfilling sex life for her and him, She Comes First offers techniques and philosophy that have already earned raves from the likes of bestselling author and Loveline co-host Dr. Drew Pinsky as well as Playgirl magazine, which cheers, “Hallelujah!”.

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love


Sue Johnson - 2008
    In Hold Me Tight, Dr. Sue Johnson presents Emotionally Focused Therapy to the general public for the first time. Johnson teaches that the way to save and enrich a relationship is to reestablish safe emotional connection and preserve the attachment bond. With this in mind, she focuses on key moments in a relationship-from "Recognizing the Demon Dialogue" to "Revisiting a Rocky Moment" -- and uses them as touch points for seven healing conversations.Through case studies from her practice, illuminating advice, and practical exercises, couples will learn how to nurture their relationships and ensure a lifetime of love.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work: A Practical Guide from the Country's Foremost Relationship Expert


John M. Gottman - 1999
    Here is the culmination of his life's work: the seven principles that guide couples on the path toward a harmonious and long-lasting relationship. Packed with practical questionnaires and exercises, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is the definitive guide for anyone who wants their relationship to attain its highest potential.

The Seven Secrets to Healthy, Happy Relationships


Miguel Ruiz Jr. - 2018
    They provide unlimited ways for us to learn, grow, thrive, and have fun! Yet, as we know, relationships aren’t always a “bed of roses”—especially romantic ones. They don’t make themselves, nor do they continue happily on autopilot once they begin. In this one-of-a-kind book, bestselling authors don Miguel Ruiz, Jr. and HeatherAsh Amara share their seven secrets to healthy, happy relationships: Commitment Freedom Awareness Healing Joy Communication Release Understanding and enacting these principles can help you at any stage in your intimate partnering, whether you’ve been with someone for many years or are currently single and want to prepare for a relationship. The authors make clear that the principles in this book aren’t secrets because they are hidden away, but are more akin to undiscovered focal points that can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections. Part of the secret, as you will see, is in the art of putting these ideas into practice day after day and year after year.

The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands


Laura Schlessinger - 2003
    Laura urgently reminds women that to take proper care of their husbands is to ensure themselves the happiness and satisfaction they yearn for in marriage.Women want to be in love, get married, and live happily ever after. Yet disrespect for men and disregard for the value, feelings, and needs of husbands has fast become the standard for male-female relations in America. Those two attitudes clash in unfortunate ways to create struggle and strife in what could be a beautiful relationship.Countless women call Dr. Laura, unhappy in their marriages and seemingly at a loss to understand the incredible power they have over their men to create the kind of home life they yearn for. Now, in The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands, Dr. Laura shows you—with real-life examples and real-life solutions—how to wield that power to attain all the sexual pleasure, intimacy, love, joy, and peace you want in your life.Dr. Laura's simple principles have changed the lives of millions. Now they can change yours.