In Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life, the beloved mic jockeys put their unique stamp on, well, the rules for sports and life. In years on the road, in the studio, and at home, Greeny and Golic have learned that it’s all about the big stuff: separating order from chaos, ensuring our survival as a species, and keeping peace. For instance: • The Fourth of July should be eliminated and replaced with an Independence Day that falls on the first Thursday of the month, creating a four-day weekend like Thanksgiving, which, by the way, could do without the Detroit Lions.• “The Human Element” in sports officiating and weather forecasting sucks. • The top pick in the NBA draft lottery should go to the team that came closest to making the playoffs—not to the team that rips off fans by mailing it in after the All-Star break. • When someone says, “I’m being completely honest,” they might as well be claiming that they go to Hooters just for the wings.• Kids do not get to eat french fries for breakfast. Ever. And who cares what the kids at the next table are ordering.• No more designated hitter! If you’re one of Golic and Greeny’s legions of followers, you probably can’t get enough of this sort of provocative, hilarious, and occasionally obsessive stuff. And if you’re one of those fans who live by the rule “There oughta be a rule,” then Mike and Mike’s Rules for Sports and Life is the book for you.

    Novak's One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories is an endlessly entertaining, surprisingly sensitive, and startlingly original debut collection that signals the arrival of a welcome new voice in American fiction.Across a dazzling range of subjects, themes, tones, and narrative voices, Novak's assured prose and expansive imagination introduce readers to people, places, and premises that are hilarious, insightful, provocative, and moving-often at the same time.In One More Thing, a boy wins a $100,000 prize in a box of Frosted Flakes - only to discover that claiming the winnings may unravel his family. A woman sets out to seduce motivational speaker Tony Robbins - turning for help to the famed motivator himself. A school principal unveils a bold plan to permanently abolish arithmetic. An acclaimed ambulance driver seeks the courage to follow his heart and throw it all away to be a singer-songwriter. Author John Grisham contemplates a monumental typo. A new arrival in heaven, overwhelmed by infinite options, procrastinates over his long-ago promise to visit his grandmother. We meet a vengeance-minded hare, obsessed with scoring a rematch against the tortoise who ruined his life; and post-college friends who debate how to stage an intervention in the era of Facebook. We learn why wearing a red t-shirt every day is the key to finding love; how February got its name; and why the stock market is sometimes just... down.Finding inspiration in questions from the nature of perfection to the icing on carrot cake, from the deeply familiar to the intoxicatingly imaginative, One More Thing finds its heart in the most human of phenomena: love, fear, family, ambition, and the inner stirring for the one elusive element that might make a person complete. The stories in this collection are like nothing else, but they have one thing in common: they share the playful humor, deep heart, inquisitive mind, and altogether electrifying spirit of a writer with a fierce devotion to the entertainment of the reader.

    Contrary to what you see on TV and in the movies, most urbanites aren't party-hopping in slinky dresses and strappy stilettos. But lucky for us, Lancaster knows how to make the life of the lower crust mercilessly funny and infinitely entertaining. Whether she's reporting rude neighbors to Homeland Security, harboring a crush on her grocery store clerk, or fighting-and losing-the Battle of the Stairmaster- Lancaster explores how silly, strange, and not-so-fabulous real city living can be. And if anyone doesn't like it, they can kiss her big, fat, pink, puffy down parka.

    If you knew you were going to die in two years, would you still have gone with the Volvo? So begins the first question of this interview between the recently deceased Linda and her Volvo’s Market Research representative. Over the course of the rest of the interview, listen in and roll down your window into not only a woman’s marriage but a psyche. This brilliantly woven tale shines a light on our collective idiosyncrasies, neuroses, and desires. In the tradition of Sally Rooney and Maria Semple, Alison Espach threads the needle between humor and devastation and emerges a master of observational satire and millennial voice.

     A must-read for all diehard O&A fans, Permanently Suspended finally answers the questions that everyone has been waiting for: What really happened between Opie and Anthony? What was the reasoning behind the multiple firings? What prompted the tweeting about the Times Square NYC incident? What is the true account of the controversial allegations? What are the never-before-revealed details of Anthony’s stint in rehab? What does the future hold for his livestream podcast? These questions, and many more, will be answered. Permanently Suspended is a humorous, no-holds-barred account of the legendary career and life of Anthony Cumia—a blue collar guy who made his dreams come true, rising above all obstacles to become one of the most well-known and successful personalities in radio history.

    Some only did it in college, or got out by sheer determination, good luck . . . or suicide. Others took it on as permanent employment. And many remain haunted by nightmare scenarios where they are the sole server in a restaurant packed with complaining patrons. For all those disenchanted current and former food service employees, Darron Cardosa has your back. His career began at a Texas steakhouse in 1984, and since 2008 he’s vented his frustrations in the popular blog The Bitchy Waiter. A snarky mix of David Sedaris, Anthony Bourdain, Erma Bombeck, and Mo Rocca, Cardosa distills 30 years of food service into dark, funny tales—about crazy customers, out-of-control egos, and what really goes on in that fancy restaurant—that anyone who worked in the industry will recognize and relate to.

    

    . . but rarely acknowledging.Filled with insights and observations that instantly ring true—and could have come only from Nora Ephron—I Remember Nothing is pure joy.

    Ever since he was given a copy of Arthur C. Clarke's Mysterious World for his ninth birthday Dom has been obsessed with the world of cryptozoology (monster hunting), and in Scary Monsters and Super Creeps he heads to six completely different destinations to investigate local monster sightings. He explores the Redwood Curtain in northern California in search of Sasquatch; in Canada he visits Lake Okanagan hoping to catch a glimpse of a thirty-foot snake-like creature called Ogopogo; and near Lake Télé in Congo he risks his life tracking the vegetarian sauropod Mokèlé-mbèmbé. Naturally he heads to Loch Ness - but for this hunt he has his family in tow; he treks across the Khumbu Valley in Nepal looking for Yeti; and in the hills above Hiroshima in Japan he enlists the help of a local man to find the Hibagon, a terribly smelly 'caveman ape'. In typically hilarious and irreverent fashion, Dom explores the cultures that gave rise to these monster myths and ends up in some pretty hairy situations with people even stranger than the monsters they are hunting. Are the monsters all the product of fevered minds, or is there a sliver of truth somewhere in the madness? Either way, the search gives Dom an excuse to dive into six fascinating destinations on a gloriously nutty adventure.

    But instead he woke up one day to find himself fired from his radio job, surrounded by feral cats, and emotionally and financially annihilated by a divorce from a woman he thought he loved. He tried to heal his broken heart through whatever means he could find—minor-league hoarding, Viagra addiction, accidental racial profiling, cat fancying, flying airplanes with his mind—but nothing seemed to work. It was only when he was stripped down to nothing that he found his way back.Attempting Normal is Marc Maron’s journey through the wilderness of his own mind, a collection of explosively, painfully, addictively funny stories that add up to a moving tale of hope and hopelessness, of failing, flailing, and finding a way. From standup to television to his outrageously popular podcast, WTF with Marc Maron, Marc has always been a genuine original, a disarmingly honest, intensely smart, brutally open comic who finds wisdom in the strangest places. This is his story of the winding, potholed road from madness and obsession and failure to something like normal, the thrillingly comic journey of a sympathetic f***up who’s trying really hard to do better without making a bigger mess. Most of us will relate.

    The brilliant and uproarious #15 bestseller (i.e., a runaway phenomenon in its own right-no, seriously) - a lavish compendium of handy reference tables, fascinating trivia, and sage wisdom - all of it completely unresearched, completely undocumented and (presumably) completely untrue, fabricated by the illuminating, prodigious imagination of John Hodgman, certifiable genius.

    Hedgefund and Wolves in Chic Clothing firmly believes in Woody Allen’s magical math equation: Comedy = Tragedy + Time. Sometimes I Feel Like a Nut is a delightful collection of essays and observations based on Jill Kargman’s family, her phobias (vans, mimes, clowns), and her ability to use humor as a tool to get past life’s obstacles, making the fun times funnier and the tough times bearable. Fans of David Sedaris, Sloane Crosley, and Nora Ephron will rejoice, howl, and sympathize

    Winik's amusing tales of outrageous mistakes, haunting uncertainty, and the never-ending struggle to stay true to her heart strike a powerful chord with creative, impassioned, independent-minded free spirits who know they're different -- and want to stay that way. Winik's seven Rules for the Unruly are: THE PATH IS NOT STRAIGHT · MISTAKES NEED NOT BE FATAL PEOPLE ARE MORE IMPORTANT THAN ACHIEVEMENTS OR POSSESSIONS BE GENTLE WITH YOUR PARENTS · NEVER STOP DOING WHAT YOU CARE ABOUT MOST LEARN TO USE A SEMICOLON · YOU WILL FIND LOVE Rules for the Unruly shows us how taking risks, living creatively, and cherishing our inner weirdness can become the secret of our happiness and success, not our downfall.

    The essays in How to Ruin Everything range from the absurd (how he became an international ivory smuggler) to the comical (his middle-school rap battle dominance) to the revelatory (his experiences with epilepsy), yet all are delivered with the type of linguistic dexterity and self-awareness that has won Watsky more than 765,000 YouTube subscribers. Alternately ribald and emotionally resonant, How to Ruin Everything announces a versatile writer with a promising career ahead.

    My goals were noble but my concerns were trivial. I desperately wanted to close the pay gap, but I also wanted to look good sitting down naked.From inclusion to the secret autonomy in rom-coms, from effective activism to what poker can tell us about power structures, Deborah explores what it means to be a twenty-first-century feminist, and encourages us to make the world better for everyone.The book also includes exclusive interviews with performers, activists and thinkers - Jessamyn Stanley, Zoe Coombs Marr, Susan Wokoma, Bisha K. Ali, Reubs Walsh, Becca Bunce, Amika George, Mo Mansfied and Leyla Hussein - plus a piece from Hannah Gadsby.