But, as Guy Winch, Ph.D., points out, these kinds of emotional injuries often get worse when left untreated and can significantly impact our quality of life. In this fascinating and highly practical book he provides the emotional first aid treatments we have been lacking. Explaining the long-term fallout that can result from seemingly minor emotional and psychological injuries, Dr. Winch offers concrete, easy-to-use exercises backed up by hard cutting-edge science to aid in recovery. He uses relatable anecdotes about real patients he has treated over the years and often gives us a much needed dose of humor as well. Prescriptive, programmatic, and unique, this first-aid kit for battered emotions will appeal to readers of Unstuck by James S. Gordon and Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff.

    Rather, it's making the most of our fantasies by brushing them up against the very thing most of us are taught to ignore or diminish: the obstacles that stand in our way." So often in our day-to-day lives we're inundated with advice to "think positively." From pop music to political speeches to commercials, the general message is the same: look on the bright side, be optimistic in the face of adversity, and focus on your dreams. And whether we're trying to motivate ourselves to lose weight, snag a promotion at work, or run a marathon, we're told time and time again that focusing on fulfilling our wishes will make them come true. Gabriele Oettingen draws on more than twenty years of research in the science of human motivation to reveal why the conventional wisdom falls short. The obstacles that we think prevent us from realizing our deepest wishes can actually lead to their fulfillment. Starry-eyed dreaming isn't all it's cracked up to be, and as it turns out, dreamers are not often doers. While optimism can help us alleviate immediate suffering and persevere in challenging times, merely dreaming about the future actually makes people more frustrated and unhappy over the long term and less likely to achieve their goals. In fact, the pleasure we gain from positive fantasies allows us to fulfill our wishes virtually, sapping our energy to perform the hard work of meeting challenges and achieving goals in real life. Based on her groundbreaking research and large-scale scientific studies, Oettingen introduces a new way to visualize the future, called mental contrasting. It combines focusing on our dreams with visualizing the obstacles that stand in our way. By experiencing our dreams in our minds and facing reality we can address our fears, make concrete plans, and gain energy to take action. In Rethinking Positive Thinking, Oettingen applies mental contrasting to three key areas of personal change-- becoming healthier, nurturing personal and professional relationships, and performing better at work. She introduces readers to the key phases of mental contrasting using a proven four-step process called WOOP--Wish, Outcome, Obstacle, Plan--and offers advice and exercises on how to best apply this method to daily life. Through mental contrasting, people in Oettingen's studies have become significantly more motivated to quit smoking, lose weight, get better grades, sustain fulfilling relationships, and negotiate more effectively in business situations. Whether you are unhappy and struggling with serious problems or you just want to improve, discover, and explore new opportunities, this book will deepen your ideas about human motivation and help you boldly chart a new path ahead.

    This empowering book presents  the insights and techniques of ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy) a revolutionary new psychotherapy based on cutting-edge research in behavioral psychology. By clarifying your values and developing mindfulness (a technique for living fully in the present moment), ACT helps you escape the happiness trap and find true satisfaction in life.     The techniques presented in The Happiness Trap will help readers to:    • Reduce stress and worry    • Handle painful feelings and thoughts more effectively    • Break self-defeating habits    • Overcome insecurity and self-doubt    • Create a rich, full, and meaningful life

    It makes us question ourselves and our decisions, causes us to worry about the future, and fills our days with dread and emotional turbulence. Based in acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), this book is designed to help you break the cycle of worry.Worry convinces us there's danger, and then tricks us into getting into fight, flight, or freeze mode—even when there is no danger. The techniques in this book, rather than encouraging you to avoid or try to resist anxiety, shows you how to see the trick that underlies your anxious thoughts, and how avoidance can backfire and make anxiety worse.If you’re ready to start observing your anxious feelings with distance and clarity—rather than getting tricked once again—this book will show you how.

    Key questions and an amazingly clear "map" are now at your fingertips to begin your journey to "Live by Design." These are questions that, with the help of this book, you can answer and bring into action-oriented focus:What are the ten most defining moments of your life?What are the seven most critical choices you have made to put you on your current path?Who are the five most pivotal people in your world and how have they shaped you? Identifying and working with these key elements are at the heart of Dr. Phillip C. McGraw's latest work, Self Matters, and soon they will be at the heart of your own new work: you. Through his books, McGraw has changed the lives of millions. In introducing the world to his matter-of-fact, tell-it-like-it-is philosophy of life, Dr. Phil, as he is known to his legions of fans, has put an end to the "everyone's a victim" attitude that had taken hold of our culture. Published in over twenty-five countries, and with millions of books sold, his two number one bestsellers, Life Strategies and Relationship Rescue, forced readers to take a serious look at the excuses they had so long been clinging to as to why they were not happy, not successful, and not enjoying their one chance at living. Now, Dr. Phil takes those lessons a great leap further and explores one of the most challenging questions facing us all: When you look in the mirror, who is truly hiding beneath that face? Instead of taking a surface look at the way we live our lives, Dr. Phil demystifies how your self-concept came to be and gives a nuts-and-bolts approach to creating a new plan for living and, in turn, for discovering the real you. In this groundbreaking work, Dr. Phil challenges you to find your "authentic self" -- that person you once were before life took its toll. It is you at your greatest, most fulfilled, most real moment. It is the person you have always wanted to be, but were too distracted, busy, or scared to become. Instead, you have created a "fictional self" -- taking on the identity of who you believe you are supposed be, the person people tell you you are. The incongruence between these two selves is what leads you to feel that your life is incomplete, unbalanced, and altogether more difficult than it really should be. The good news is it no longer needs to be that way. By using the plan set forth in Self Matters, Dr. Phil helps you to demystify your self-concept and learn how to reclaim your authentic self. In evaluating your life by only the facts, you can learn to think beyond the excuses and fears that have masked the person you have always wanted to be. Self Matters is one of the most forward-thinking works on self-concept and self-esteem ever published. For the first time, an author tells it how it is and, in the process, teaches us all how to live the lives we have always wanted but prevented ourselves from living. We get only one chance in this world, and now, Dr. Phil shows all how to make the most of it.

    More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne’s classic is as astonishing–and revealing–as it was on the day it was first published. This anniversary edition features a new introduction by Dr. James R. Allen, president of the International Transactional Analysis Association, and Kurt Vonnegut’s brilliant Life magazine review from 1965.We play games all the time–sexual games, marital games, power games with our bosses, and competitive games with our friends. Detailing status contests like “Martini” (I know a better way), to lethal couples combat like “If It Weren’t For You” and “Uproar,” to flirtation favorites like “The Stocking Game” and “Let’s You and Him Fight,” Dr. Berne exposes the secret ploys and unconscious maneuvers that rule our intimate lives.Explosive when it first appeared, Games People Play is now widely recognized as the most original and influential popular psychology book of our time. It’s as powerful and eye-opening as ever.

    Here is a way to overcome these communication challenges. HOW TO TALK TO ANYONE, ANYTIME, ANYWHERE is the key to building confidence and improving communication skills. Written by Larry King, this guide provides simple and practical advice to help make communication easier, more successful, and even more enjoyable. Anecdotes from a life spent talking--on television, radio, and in person,--add to the fun and value of the book. Learn what famous talkers say and how the way they say it makes them so successful.Lessons include: How to overcome shyness and put other people at ease How to choose an appropriate conversation topic for any situation How to ace a job interview, run a meeting, and mingle at a cocktail party What the most successful conversationalists have in common The one great question you can ask to enhance your conversation with anyone, anytime, anywhere

    Rather than feeling large and in charge, we feel little and belittled.Sound familiar? Bestselling "anti-guru" Sarah Knight has three simple words for you: YOU DO YOU. It's time to start putting your happiness first--and stop letting other people tell you what to do, how to do it, or why it can't be done. And don't panic! You can do it without losing friends and alienating people. Knight delivers her trademark no-bullsh*t advice about:The Tyranny of "Just Because"The social contract and how to amend itTurning "flaws" into strengths--aka "mental redecorating"Why it's not your job to be niceLetting your freak flag flyHow to take risks, silence the doubters, and prove the haters wrongPraise for Sarah Knight"Genius." --Cosmopolitan"Self-help to swear by." --Boston Globe"Hilarious... truly practical." --Booklist

    Despite early success in the corporate world, his first attempt to pursue his entrepreneurial dream ended in rejection. Jia was crushed and spiraled into a period of deep self-doubt. But he realized that his fear of rejection was a bigger obstacle than any single rejection would ever be, and he needed to find a way to cope with being told no without letting it destroy him. Thus was born his "100 days of rejection" experiment, during which he willfully sought rejection on a daily basis - from requesting a lesson in sales from a car salesman (no) to asking a flight attendant if he could make an announcement on the loudspeaker (yes) to his famous request to get Krispy Kreme doughnuts in the shape of Olympic rings (yes, with a viral video to prove it).Jia learned that even the most preposterous wish may be granted if you ask in the right way, and here he shares the secret of successful asking, how to pick targets, and how to tell when an initial no can be converted into something positive. But more important, he learned techniques for steeling himself against rejection and ways to develop his own confidence - a plan that can't be derailed by a single setback.Filled with great stories and valuable insight, Rejection Proof is a fun and thoughtful examination of how to overcome fear and dare to live more boldly.

     More than forty-four percent of Americans admit to losing sleep over stress. And while most of us do everything we can to reduce it, Stanford psychologist and bestselling author Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D., delivers a startling message: Stress isn’t bad. In The Upside of Stress, McGonigal highlights new research indicating that stress can, in fact, make us stronger, smarter, and happier—if we learn how to embrace it. The Upside of Stress is the first book to bring together cutting-edge discoveries on the correlation between resilience—the human capacity for stress-related growth—and mind-set, the power of beliefs to shape reality. As she did in The Willpower Instinct, McGonigal combines science, stories, and exercises into an engaging and practical book that is both entertaining and life-changing, showing you:how to cultivate a mind-set to embrace stresshow stress can provide focus and energyhow stress can help people connect and strengthen close relationshipswhy your brain is built to learn from stress, and how to increase its ability to learn from challenging experiences McGonigal’s TED talk on the subject has already received more than 7 million views. Her message resonates with people who know they can’t eliminate the stress in their lives and want to learn to take advantage of it. The Upside of Stress is not a guide to getting rid of stress, but a guide to getting better at stress, by understanding it, embracing it, and using it.

    Seligman draws on more than twenty years of clinical research to demonstrate how optimism enchances the quality of life, and how anyone can learn to practice it. Offering many simple techniques, Dr. Seligman explains how to break an “I—give-up” habit, develop a more constructive explanatory style for interpreting your behavior, and experience the benefits of a more positive interior dialogue. These skills can help break up depression, boost your immune system, better develop your potential, and make you happier.. With generous additional advice on how to encourage optimistic behavior at school, at work and in children, Learned Optimism is both profound and practical–and valuable for every phase of life.

    During flow, people typically experience deep enjoyment, creativity, and a total involvement with life. Csikszentmihalyi demonstrates the ways this positive state can be controlled, not just left to chance. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience teaches how, by ordering the information that enters our consciousness, we can discover true happiness, unlock our potential, and greatly improve the quality of our lives.

    But that's much more easily said than done. What does being happy actually mean? And how do you even know when you feel it?Across the millennia, philosophers have thought long and hard about happiness, and come up with all sorts of different definitions and ideas for how we might live a happier life. Here, Derren explores the history of happiness from classical times until today, when the self-help industry has attempted to claim happiness as its own. His aim is to reclaim happiness for us all, and enable us to appreciate the really good things in life for what they are.Fascinating, entertaining and revelatory, this is a book for anyone who has ever wondered if there must be more to life...

    Nonviolent Communication partners practical skills with a powerful consciousness and vocabulary to help you get what you want peacefully.In this internationally acclaimed text, Marshall Rosenberg offers insightful stories, anecdotes, practical exercises and role-plays that will dramatically change your approach to communication for the better. Discover how the language you use can strengthen your relationships, build trust, prevent conflicts and heal pain. Revolutionary, yet simple, NVC offers you the most effective tools to reduce violence and create peace in your life—one interaction at a time.Over 150,000 copies sold and now available in 20 languages around the world. More than 250,000 people each year from all walks of life are learning these life-changing skills.

     Is your phone the first thing you reach for in the morning and the last thing you touch before bed? Do you frequently pick it up "just to check," only to look up forty-five minutes later wondering where the time has gone? Do you say you want to spend less time on your phone--but have no idea how to do so without giving it up completely? If so, this book is your solution.Award-winning journalist Catherine Price presents a practical, hands-on plan to break up--and then make up--with your phone. The goal? A long-term relationship that actually feels good. You'll discover how phones and apps are designed to be addictive, and learn how the time we spend on them damages our abilities to focus, think deeply, and form new memories. You'll then make customized changes to your settings, apps, environment, and mindset that will ultimately enable you to take back control of your life.