It’s a world of craziness, lost reservations, the “Master Bait & Tackle Shop”, Pet Jacuzzis, Pompeii pornography, the Electric Chair beauty salon, Cowboy poetry gatherings, strips searches, a Cannabis festival, the “Miss Swamp Buggy” beauty contest, cancelled flights, tattooed Santa, the “Shrub Guy”, an Iranian comic, free dwarf mice, and Hitler’s town car on display in a Las Vegas casino. After reading Ken Levine’s hilarious and instructive excursions, you’ll be on the phone to your travel agent, either booking or canceling your next trip.

    It's a chunky book of 400 questions that range from the heinous to the nauseating to the downright disturbing, each a field-tested conversation starter—because no matter how strange or far-fetched, Would You Rather...? knows that choice provokes thinking, and thinking is fun. Some questions, like a Rorschach test, reveal values: Would you rather . . . Age only from the neck up -OR- age only from the neck down? Be stupid and rich -OR- smart and poor? Some delight in their own grossness: Eat three earthworms -OR- wear a necklace made of them on your wedding day? Be trapped in an elevator with wet dogs -OR- three fat men with bad breath? Some churn up prejudices: Lose your mate to the same sex as yourself -OR- the opposite sex? Some create that squirming sensation: Get a bad case of poison ivy way up inside your nose -OR- inside your inner ear? Or ethical dilemmas: Be president of a firm that poaches endangered species -OR- work for a corrupt politician? And some are just deliciously absurd: Catch a porcupine thrown from a second-story window -OR- a skunk thrown from the same window? Each question is followed up with related, often off-the-wall information, from odd trivia to dumb jokes to the occasional practical advice (go for the skunk—the porcupine's got 30,000 quills, while tomato juice will take away the skunk smell).

    Perfect for busy writers or writers who are easily distracted or who want a better way to make consistent progress with their writing. Includes write ups from 15-minute writers who swear by the method. Also covers mindset, getting into a writing flow, how to clear mental clutter so you can focus during your writing session, and more.

    ("fresh off the boat")Does your mom still make Peking duck instead of turkey on Thanksgiving, own a giant cleaver, or take twenty-four more napkins than she needs at Chipotle?Your mom may be a fob.Through their hit blog "My Mom Is a Fob," Teresa and Serena Wu have seized ownership of this formerly derogatory term, applying it instead to the heartfelt, hilarious, and thoroughly unique ways that Asian mothers adapt to American culture, from the perspective of those who love them most: their children.Through texts, emails, phone calls, and more, My Mom Is a Fob showcases the stories of a community of Asian-American kids who know exactly what it's like to be on the receiving end of that amazing, unconditional, and sometimes misspelled love. It's about those Asian mothers who refuse to get in the car without their sun-protective arm sheaths, the ones who send us passive-aggressive text messages "from the dog" in hopes that we'll call home, and email us unsolicited advice about everything from homosexuality to constipation. In these pages you'll find solace in the fact that thousands of moms out there are as painfully nosy, unintentionally hilarious, and endearingly fobby as yours is.

    Delve deep into the mind of these creatures and learn what makes them tick.

    Some of the most prominent professionals in TV broadcasting and at major newspapers and magazines-people who really should know better-are guilty of making all-too-common grammatical errors. In this delightfully amusing, clever guide, Thomas Parrish points out real-life grammar gaffes from top-notch publications such as the New York Times and the New Yorker to illustrate just how widespread these errors are. With red pen in hand, Parrish's fictional friend the Grouchy Grammarian leads the charge, examining the forty-seven most common mistakes in English and imparting the basics of good grammar with a charming mixture of fussiness and common sense. All of which makes The Grouchy Grammarian the most entertaining, accessible how-not-to guide you'll ever read.

    A collection of the author's most imaginative Chindohgu, otherwise known as unuseless ideas, includes the bath body suit and the walk 'n' wash ankle-attachable laundry tank.

    Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known.Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE is packed with valuable information-such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.

    L. Doctorow, and Frank Rich, into a useful guide not just for writers but for everyone who wants to put their best foot forward in writing prose. Dreyer offers lessons on the ins and outs of punctuation and grammar, including how to navigate the words he calls "the confusables," like tricky homophones; the myriad ways to use (and misuse) a comma; and how to recognize--though not necessarily do away with--the passive voice. (Hint: If you can plausibly add "by zombies" to the end of a sentence, it's passive.) People are sharing their writing more than ever--on blogs, on Twitter--and this book lays out, clearly and comprehensibly, everything writers can do to keep readers focused on the real reason writers write: to communicate their ideas clearly and effectively. Chock-full of advice, insider wisdom, and fun facts on the rules (and nonrules) of the English language, this book will prove invaluable to everyone who wants to shore up their writing skills, mandatory for people who spend their time editing and shaping other people's prose, and--perhaps best of all--an utter treat for anyone who simply revels in language.

     The essential source book for every romantic novelist, this helpful guide contains over 3,000 descriptive tags all arranged for quick, easy reference. Now you too can add life and breath to any romantic novel. The Romantic Writer's Phrase Book neatly organizes these tags into fifty easy-to-use categories, including: physical description, body movements, facial expressions, eyes, voices, emotions, and sex. Guaranteed to stimulate the imagination and make your manuscript a resounding success.

    These essays, which found a well-deserved home within the pages of Reader's Digest as the column "My Planet," detail the inner workings of hypochondriacs, hoarders, and compulsive cheapskates. (Did we mention neurotic interior designers and professional list-makers?) For Roach, humor is hidden in the most unlikely places, which means that nothing is off limits. Whether she is dwelling on her age or talking about the pros and cons of a bedroom night light -- "A married couple can best be defined as a unit of people whose sleep habits are carefully engineered to keep each other awake" -- Roach finds a lesson, a slice of sarcasm, or a dash of something special that makes each day comical and absolutely priceless.In keeping with our mission -- curating the best reads in the land -- Reader's Digest editors neatly packaged these timeless (and hilarious) Roach essays together for the first time. Whether you read this cover-to-cover or during spare moments over morning coffee, flip to a page in this volume and try not to smile.

    Scheisse! introduces readers to the fine art of cursing and basic slang to spice up their German speech.If you think you have a fairly good command of German, think again. For it's a sure bet that Frau Schultz never taught you those nasty little guttural curses and humiliating invectives so expressive of real low German speech. But relax--here at last is the one book that can introduce you to the very worst beer-hall German. Scheisse! is an indispensable guide to off-color German colloquialisms and profanities--lascivious bedroom slang and boozy insults, jeering scatological put-downs and scurrilous ridicule. This hilarious illustrated cornucopia of creative expletives, guaranteed to vex, taunt, aggravate, and provoke as only overwrought low German can, will help you master the fine art of German verbal abuse--with triumphant one-upmanship.

    It contains meticulous trail descriptions that range from comfortable strolls for families to difficult treks for those looking for a challenging workout. Extensive key-at-a-glance information makes it easier to choose a hike based on length, difficulty, or scenery. A helpful list of hikes in the front of the book highlights those with special interests — best hikes for children, scenic hikes, hikes good for wildlife viewing, best hikes for runners, and more. Each hike report includes commentary on trailside geology, flowers, and wildlife. Historical notes provide fascinating details about early miners, trailblazers, the Pony Express, and Mormon pioneers. Whether lacing up boots, stepping into sneakers or strapping on snowshoes, Salt Lake City is a premier destination for outdoor adventure.

    Allowing you to combine the various elements that make up your writing project, from outlines to research to note, Scrivener helped author Nicole Dionisio write two novels in a single year. Our manual outlines how to use Scrivener to make your writing better, and is useful for writers of all stripes – which includes you. It is 48 hours before your dissertation is due and, despite the chaos, you are trying to complete the final edits, because it’s the only choice you have.There is one problem — and it isn’t the pile of unclean dishes housing sea-green mold and chatty-vermin that has become your sink — it is your computer and it is time. You should be going faster then this, you put your blood-shot pounding head in your hands and groan, “Why am I going so slow? This computer is brand new... what is the problem?”It isn’t your computer’s specs. It is your writing process. It is because you have not yet started using Scrivener.It is opening up a new webpage or PDF every 15 minutes to fact-check research. It is switching back and forth be- tween this research, your outline, your bibliography, and your draft. It is waiting for your files to load, bouncing be- tween them, and getting lost in the quantity of windows on your computer screen or document.Scrivener has two key features: it loads all documents at once and it has many visual organizational tools. Scrivener has optimum productivity, thus it gives writers more time to actually write and accomplish their goals.This manual outlines: -Planning your manuscript-Importing existing documents into Scrivener-Collecting your notes-Organizing files and documents within Scrivener-Keeping track of your characters for fiction writing-Bringing it all together and writing your manuscript-The editing process, including sharing with beta readers.-Publishing your masterpiece online

    Imagine being able to challenge anyone with seemingly impossible bets, safe in the knowledge that you will always win. Imagine no more. Richard Wiseman is a psychologist who has traveled the globe in search of the world's greatest bets and in "101 Bets You Will Always Win" he shows you how to use science, logic and a healthy dose of trickery always to be on the winning side of every bet you make. Using coins, dice, matchsticks and ordinary objects, you'll discover, among many other things,- how to balance a coin on the edge of a dollar bill - pick a cup up with a balloon - balance two forks and a matchstick on your fingertip - separate two glasses without touching themIn explaining the bets, Wiseman also explains the science behind them making what at first seems mystifying as natural as the laws of gravity. Let YouTube sensation Richard Wiseman turn you into one of those smart people who can say "I'll bet I can..." and know that you'll never lose.