Best of
Humor

2012

The Dork Diaries Set: Dork Diaries Books 1, 2, 3, 3 1/2, 4, and 5


Rachel Renée Russell - 2012
    This boxed set includes all five standalone Dork Diary titles—Tales from a Not-So-Fabulous Life, Tales from a Not-So-Popular Party Girl, Tales from a Not-So-Talented Pop Star, Tales from a Not-So-Graceful Ice Princess, and Tales from a Not-So-Smart Miss Know-it-All—as well as the interactive How to Dork Your Diary. And the added bonus of a special collectible poster means fans can proudly proclaim their love of all things Dorky!

Big Nate Makes the Grade


Lincoln Peirce - 2012
    But beating out brainiac Gina's grades is not one of those things! In Big Nate Makes the Grade, the school life goings-on of Nate, his pals, and his long-suffering teachers are recounted in hilarious detail. Now in full-color with poster!

A Man Called Ove


Fredrik Backman - 2012
    Meet Ove. He's a curmudgeon, the kind of man who points at people he dislikes as if they were burglars caught outside his bedroom window. He has staunch principles, strict routines, and a short fuse. People call him the bitter neighbor from hell, but must Ove be bitter just because he doesn't walk around with a smile plastered to his face all the time?Behind the cranky exterior there is a story and a sadness. So when one November morning a chatty young couple with two chatty young daughters move in next door and accidentally flatten Ove's mailbox, it is the lead-in to a comical and heartwarming tale of unkempt cats, unexpected friendship, and the ancient art of backing up a U-Haul. All of which will change one cranky old man and a local residents' association to their very foundations.

Big Nate: What Could Possibly Go Wrong?


Lincoln Peirce - 2012
    Godfrey catch him in the act? Find out what happens next!The activities are brand-new for Big Nate fans!Diary of a Wimpy Kid author Jeff Kinney says, "Big Nate is funny, big time!"

Here Goes Nothing


Lincoln Peirce - 2012
    . . again? Find out what happens next!Plus, bonus Big Nate material in the back!

Garfield Vol. 1


Jim Davis - 2012
    Join Garfield as he begins his comic book exploits with Jon, Odie, and the rest of the gang in this all-ages must-read from KaBOOM! THE GARFIELD SHOW writer and comics luminary Mark Evanier teams up with beloved Garfield strip cartoonist Gary Barker to bring you all the laughs (and lasagna) you can handle.

All Work and No Play: A Collection of Sundays


Lincoln Peirce - 2012
    Enjoy more than two years of Sunday cartoons, portraying the colorful life of  Nate Wright. This spunky eleven-year-old holds the school record for detentions and is in little chance of losing that distinction, but that doesn't stop him from dreaming big!He's a self-described genius, a sixth-grade renaissance man, and a full-fledged believer in his future as a cartoonist. Equipped with a No. 2 pencil and the unshakable belief that he is No. 1, Nate fights a daily battle against overzealous teachers, undercooked cafeteria food, and all-around conventionality.

Underwater Dogs


Seth Casteel - 2012
    From the water's surface, it's a simple exercise: a dog's leap, a splash, and then a wet head surfacing with a ball, triumphant. But beneath the water is a chaotic ballet of bared teeth and bubbles, paddling paws, fur and ears billowing in the currents. From leaping Lab to diving Dachshund, the water is where a dog's distinct personality shines through; some lounge in the current, paddling slowly, but others arch their bodies to cut through the water with the focus and determination of a shark. In more than eighty portraits, award-winning pet photographer and animal rights activist Seth Casteel captures new sides of our old friends with vibrant underwater photography that makes it impossible to look away. Each image bubbles with exuberance and life, a striking reminder that even in the most loveable and domesticated dog, there are more primal forces at work. In Underwater Dogs, Seth Casteel gives playful and energetic testament to the rough-and-tumble joy that our dogs bring into our lives.

Louisiana Longshot


Jana Deleon - 2012
    Posing as a former beauty queen turned librarian in a small, bayou town seems worse than death to Fortune, but she's determined to fly below the radar until her boss finds the leak and puts the arms dealer out of play.Unfortunately, she hasn't even unpacked a suitcase before her newly-inherited dog digs up a human bone in her backyard. Thrust into the middle of a bayou murder mystery, Fortune teams up with a couple of seemingly-sweet old ladies whose looks completely belie their hold on the little town. To top things off, the handsome local deputy is asking her too many questions. If she's not careful, this investigation may blow her cover and get her killed.Armed with her considerable skills and a group of old ladies referred to by locals as The Geritol Mafia, Fortune has no choice but to solve the murder before it's too late.

Illegal My Ass


Makeandoffer - 2012
    Her brother knew it, her best friend knew it. Everyone knew it. She lives for the moment, doing whatever she feels and thinking of the consequences later. Her main goal in life is to live it.Mia’s brother’s best friend Drake O’Connell was never big on rules.The judge who sentences him to 2 years in prison knew it. He is known for being the badboy, partying and womanising. His charm, good looks and obnoxious behaviour made his life pretty easy and his main goal in it was to have fun. He had lost 2 years of his life locked up, so he was determined to make up for lost time.So when these two people are thrown together, both without a care in the world, issues of their own and more secrets than an episode of Pretty Little Liars, you can expect a story full of laughs, tears, arguments and felonies.They might be breaking the law, but both Mia and Drake are about to find out that when it feels wrong, it is ALWAYS more fun.©makeandoffer

Goldilocks and the Three Dinosaurs


Mo Willems - 2012
    . . and a Dinosaur who happened to be visiting from Norway.One day--for no particular reason--they decided to tidy up their house, make the beds, and prepare pudding of varying temperatures. And then--for no particular reason--they decided to go...someplace else. They were definitely NOT setting a trap for some succulent, unsupervised little girl.Definitely not!This new take on a fairy-tale classic is so funny and so original--it could only come from the brilliant mind of Mo Willems.

Adventure Time #1


Aaron RenierBraden Lamb - 2012
    The top-rated Cartoon Network show now has its own comic book! With the show exploding in the ratings, garnering rave online reviews, major cosplay at the San Diego Comic-Con, and huge displays dominating the New York Comic Con, it's clear fandom is obsessed and 2012 is the Year of Adventure Time! Don't miss out on this new phenomenon - this first issue is sure to get snapped up!

The Three Ninja Pigs


Corey Rosen Schwartz - 2012
    Good thing their sister has been training every day to master some serious karate moves that save the day. KIYA!Corey Rosen Schwartz serves up a fun combination of smart-aleck dialogue and tongue-in-cheek rhymes that'll have kids howling, and rising star Dan Santat's spunky illustrations are sure to pack a punch!

Peanuts Vol. 1


Charles M. Schulz - 2012
    This collection brings the gang together in a series of heartwarming and hilarious stories, including "Woodstock's New Nest" and "Carnival of the Animals."

Just Jory


Mary Calmes - 2012
    A ficlet which is set in the time period between Bulletproof and But For You .__________Status: completeWords: 2,783

The Compleat Ankh-Morpork: City Guide


Terry Pratchett - 2012
    In spades.We ask that when you pore over this glorious work you spare some thought for the humble cartographers and surveyors who made journeys into the darker corners of our metropolis - no less dangerous than the wilds of Skund or Bhangbhangduc. To some the only memorial is the map you now possess. Others, in their quest for knowledge, paid the highest price that scholarship demands, which is to say, a day off in lieu.And so we dedicate this map and these accompanying words to the officers, councilors and members of the Merchants' Guild and to all who will find in its pages paths yet to tread and places yet to explore within the magnificentbwonder that is the city of Ankh-Morpork.

Pearls Freaks the #*%# Out: A (Freaky) Pearls Before Swine Treasury


Stephan Pastis - 2012
    Joining the circuslike cavalcade are Pig, the slow but good-hearted conscience of the strip; Goat, the voice of reason that often goes unheard; Zebra, the activist; and those eternally inept carnivorous Crocs, who we learn happen to taste a lot like chicken. Pastis's cynical humor and sharp wit imbue this entertaining vaudevillian collection.

Sixty Five Hours


N.R. Walker - 2012
    Sixty Five Hours to get along. Sixty Five Hours to not kill each other. Sixty Five Hours to fall in love.** First published in 2012. No additional content has been added.

I Funny: A Middle School Story


James Patterson - 2012
    He's new in town and stuck living with his aunt, uncle, and their evil son Stevie, a bully who doesn't let Jamie's wheelchair stop him from messing with Jamie as much as possible. But Jamie doesn't let his situation get him down. When his Uncle Frankie mentions a contest called The Planet's Funniest Kid Comic, Jamie knows he has to enter. But are the judges only rewarding him out of pity because of his wheelchair, like Stevie suggests? Will Jamie ever share the secret of his troubled past instead of hiding behind his comedy act?Following the bestselling success of the hilarious Middle School, The Worst Years of My Life, James Patterson continues to dish out the funnies in another highly-illustrated, heartfelt middle school story. (Includes more than 175 black-and-white illustrations.)

Darth Vader and Son


Jeffrey Brown - 2012
    Celebrated artist Jeffrey Brown's delightful illustrations give classic Star Wars moments a fresh twist, presenting the trials and joys of parenting through the lens of a galaxy far, far away. Life lessons include lightsaber batting practice, using the Force to raid the cookie jar, Take Your Child to Work Day on the Death Star ("Er, he looks just like you, Lord Vader!"), and the special bond shared between any father and son.

Creepy Carrots!


Aaron Reynolds - 2012
    Jasper Rabbit loves carrots—especially Crackenhopper Field carrots.He eats them on the way to school.He eats them going to Little League.He eats them walking home.Until the day the carrots start following him...or are they?Celebrated artist Peter Brown’s stylish illustrations pair perfectly with Aaron Reynold’s text in this hilarious eBook with audio that shows it’s all fun and games…until you get too greedy.

Chopsticks


Amy Krouse Rosenthal - 2012
    But one day, this inseparable pair comes to a fork in the road. And for the very first time, they have to figure out how to function apart. From New York Times best-selling author Amy Krouse Rosenthal and rising artistic talent Scott Magoon, this witty and inventive tale celebrates both independence and the unbreakable bonds of friendship.

T-Rex Trying


Hugh Murphy - 2012
    It’s hard to be the Lizard King when you can’t even change a light bulb.Drawn from Hugh Murphy’s wildly popular Tumblr feed of the same name, T-Rex Trying depicts the stubby-armed tyrant in a range of hilarious—yet pathos-inducing—activities that we humans take for granted. Murphy’s 100 drawings include: T-Rex Trying to Paint His House T-Rex Trying to Use a Drive-Through ATM T-Rex Trying to Apply Sunscreen T-Rex Trying to Break Into a Vending Machine T-Rex Trying to Ask for a New Roll of Toilet Paper from the Next Stall Looks like the ancient beast isn’t so tough after all.

Z Is for Moose


Kelly Bingham - 2012
    Zebra wants to put on a show as simple as A-B-C, but Zebra's friend Moose has other (unexpected and hilarious) ideas. Full color.

Guide to Troubled Birds


Matt Adrian - 2012
    We are only just discovering the reality of our avian adversaries, with their reptilian brains, their appetites for mayhem and the fact that they fly mostly to spite us. To ignore the information found within this volume may be at the peril of your very life.

We Learn Nothing


Tim Kreider - 2012
    We watch him navigate a fraught relationship with a lonely uncle in jail who—as he degenerates into madness— continues to plead for the support of his conflicted nephew. And we cringe as he gets outed as a “moby” at a Tea Party rally. In moments like these, we can’t help but ask ourselves: How far would we go for our own family members, and when is someone simply too far gone to save? Are there truly “bad people,” and if so, should we change them? With a perfect combination of humor and pathos, these essays, peppered with Kreider’s signature cartoons, leave us with newfound wisdom and a unique prism through which to examine our own chaotic journeys through life.Uncompromisingly candid, sometimes mercilessly so, these comically illustrated essays are rigorous exercises in self-awareness and self-reflection. These are the conversations you have only with best friends or total strangers, late at night over drinks, near closing time.

How to Babysit a Grandpa


Jean Reagan - 2012
    series -- about a child spending time with his grandpa. Written in a how-to style, the narrator gives important tips for "babysitting" a grandpa, including what to eat for snack (anything dipped in ketchup, ice cream topped with cookies, cookies topped with ice cream), what to do on a walk (find lizards and dandelion puffs, be on the lookout for puddles and sprinklers), and how to play with a grandpa (build a pirate cave, put on a scary play). Filled with humor, energy, and warmth, this is a great gift for or from a grandparent, and perfect for lap reading when Grandpa comes to visit!

Cabin Pressure: The Collected Series


John Finnemore - 2012
    Whether flying a cat to Abu Dhabi, dealing with a nervous bassoonist, hunting for a cleverly-hidden lemon or attempting to celebrate Christmas in seven minutes, no job is too small, but many, many jobs are too difficult. Carolyn Knapp-Shappey, MJN Air's formidable boss, has employed two of the very cheapest pilots money can buy: Captain Martin Crieff, who's always wanted to fly and won't let a little thing like lack of ability stop him, and First Officer Douglas Richardson, smooth-voiced old sky-god and eternal schemer. Passenger service is provided by the relentlessly cheery Arthur, proud inventor of both Surprising Rice and his own hat. Written by John Finnemore (John Finnemore's Souvenir Programme, The Now Show), Cabin Pressure stars Stephanie Cole as Carolyn, Benedict Cumberbatch as Martin, Roger Allam as Douglas, and John Finnemore as Arthur.

Bird & Squirrel on the Run


James Burks - 2012
    Bird doesn't have a care in the world. And Cat wants to eat Bird and Squirrel. Of course, he'll have to catch them first, and that's not going to be easy.Join this trio as they head south for the winter in a hilarious road trip. But watch out! Cat is waiting around every bend, and he's one pesky feline.

What If You Had Animal Teeth!?


Sandra Markle - 2012
    If you had a beaver's, you'd have orange teeth! And if you had a naked mole rat's set of teeth, you could move each one separately, like chopsticks! The animal kingdom has lots of cool teeth, but yours are pretty awesome, too!

Wheel-Mouse vs All The Crazy Robots


Celyn Lawrence - 2012
    All profits are going to a hospice charity that helps care for terminally ill and life-limited children.See it here: http://wheel-mouse.blogspot.co.uk/201...Buy it for kindle on Amazon.The story comes from my severely disabled daughter, Celyn (aged 8). She used a head-switch and communication device & I did the illustrations.

This Moose Belongs to Me


Oliver Jeffers - 2012
    He hadn't always owned a moose. The moose came to him a while ago and he knew, just KNEW, that it was meant to be his. He thought he would call him Marcel. Most of the time Marcel is very obedient, abiding by the many rules of How to Be a Good Pet. But imagine Wilfred's surprise when one dark day, while deep in the woods, someone else claims the moose as their own...

Dragons Love Tacos


Adam Rubin - 2012
    They love chicken tacos, beef tacos, great big tacos, and teeny tiny tacos. So if you want to lure a bunch of dragons to your party, you should definitely serve tacos. Buckets and buckets of tacos. Unfortunately, where there are tacos, there is also salsa. And if a dragon accidentally eats spicy salsa . . . oh, boy. You're in red-hot trouble.The award-winning team behind Those Darn Squirrels! has created an unforgettable, laugh-until-salsa-comes-out-of-your-nose tale of new friends and the perfect snack.

Taking Care of Business


Lutishia Lovely - 2012
    . .After a long bout of misfortune, betrayal, and broken hearts, the Livingstons and their soul food empire are thriving. Toussaint Livingston is the Food Network darling, Malcolm Livingston's BBQ Soul Smoker is still the toast of QVC, and Bianca Livingston's brainchild TOSTS--Taste Of Soul Tapas Style--is a sizzling sensation on L.A.'s Sunset Strip. It seems that nothing can stop the progress of this third generation--until a dish called trouble gets added to the menu.Jefferson Livingston is the only sibling who feels he hasn't made his mark, a fact for which he partly blames Toussaint. But with a recent promotion and a sexy new assistant, Jefferson is ready to show his cousin just how big a mistake he made. Then a fire breaks out, an old enemy rears his ugly head, and a stranger threatens the family's legacy. Jefferson and Toussaint must now work together to keep the dynasty from falling apart. Can they put their differences aside long enough to take care of business? There's only one way to find out. . . ."A great new taste in the literary world." --Carl Weber

Let's Sing a Lullaby with the Brave Cowboy


Jan Thomas - 2012
    And her Brave Cowboy and his silly, interrupted lullaby are sure to get everybody singing—before they head off into cozy dreamland…

No Money Down


Julie Moffett - 2012
    And it all started back when I worked for the NSA...My best friend Basia dragged me to the beach for her idea of a vacation. All those annoying people, sand in embarrassing places--not exactly R & R for a girl who doesn't like the sun, the ocean or bathing suits. I couldn't wait to get back to work.But things started looking up when I ran into Elvis and Xavier Zimmerman. We discovered we had a lot in common: gaming, anchovies, hacking. After that, the vacation was perfect--until I accidentally broke some poor guy's fingers. Then Broken-Fingered Guy disappeared, and things got really dicey. With the Secret Service and a bunch of thugs suddenly after me, all I wanted was to solve the mystery and enjoy what was left of my vacation--preferably alive.Prequel to No One Lives Twice.26,000 words

Are You a Cow?


Sandra Boynton - 2012
    As readers answer the chicken’s questions, they’ll gain animal recognition skills as well as an important understanding: No matter who we are, it’s great to just be ourselves.     From the author and illustrator of such bestselling classics as Moo, Baa, La La La! and A to Z, this cheerful, witty board book is sure to delight children and parents alike with Sandra Boynton’s trademark sense of humor.

Seduction and Snacks


Tara Sivec - 2012
    When Carter, the one-night-stand from her past that changed her life forever, shows up in her hometown bar without any recollection of her besides her unique chocolate scent, Claire will make it a point that he remembers her this time. With Carter's undisguised shock at suddenly finding out he has a four-year-old son and Claire's panic that her stretch marks and slim to none bedroom experience will send the man of her dreams heading for the hills, the pair will do whatever they can to get their happily ever after.Warning: contains explicit sex, profanity and enough sarcasm to choke a horse.

Peanuts: It's Tokyo, Charlie Brown


Charles M. Schulz - 2012
    Charlie Brown can’t believe his team was picked, but even with the addition of a sports star like Peppermint Patty, do they have any hope of winning? Between seeing the sights and taking in the best of Japanese culture, Snoopy, Charlie Brown, Peppermint Patty and the rest of everyone’s favorite characters still manage to be their incorrigible selves.

The Wimpy Kid Movie Diary, How Greg Heffley Went Hollywood, The Story of all Three Movies


Jeff Kinney - 2012
    Author and illustrator Jeff Kinney didn't know either, but when his bestselling Diary of a Wimpy Kid series was turned into a live-action movie by 20th Century Fox, he learned how books get adapted for the screen in not one but three major motion pictures. Complete with photographs, script pages, storyboard sketches, costume designs, and original art by Jeff Kinney, "The Wimpy Kid Movie Diary"--now updated to include the new movie "Diary of a Wimpy: Dog Days"--is the perfect companion to the bestselling series.(DOG DAYS EDITION), INCLUDES 32 NEW PAGES ABOUT THE THIRD WIMPY KID MOVIE, DOG DAYS, PLUS AN ALL-NEW COVER ILLUSTRATION

B^F: The Novelization Of The Feature Film


Ryan North - 2012
    He was supplied with a screenplay still in flux, writing his novelization even as the movie itself was being rewritten and as major roles were being recast (Michael J. Fox was not the first person to play Marty McFly). Partially because of this, and partially because of Gipe's natural writing style, the novelization is coo-coo bananas. It is totally insane. It's... kind of awesome?I feel like I should mention that after he submitted his manuscript, George Gipe was stung to death by bees.This book is the page-by-page reading guide to Gipe's novelization of Back to the Future, pointing out where things are different from the movie (often!) why and how they're worse (even more often!) and even when they're better (it happens, like, twice). It is written by Ryan North who writes the online strip Dinosaur Comics and the Adventure Time comic book. There are lots of pictures and lots of jokes and you will have a fun time reading (EVEN MORE SO THAN YOU NORMALLY DO).

Take Away the A


Michaël Escoffier - 2012
    The idea behind the book is that within every language there are words that change and become a different word through the simple subtraction of a single letter. In other words, without the "A," the Beast is Best. Or, without the "M," a chomp becomes a chop—though it could be that this particular play on words didn't even make it into the book, there are so many! We certainly don't want to give too much away. . . . Now, take a look and find some more! Discovering all of the words in the book is a lot of fun, and then there's the wild, exciting adventure that follows, of trying to find more!Michaël Escoffier was born in France in 1970. Raised by a family of triceratops, he discovered his passion for writing and telling stories at a young age. He lives in Lyon, France, with his wife and two children.Kris Di Giacomo is a popular children's book illustrator who has lived in France for most of her life. After living in the United States for a while, she moved to France, where teaching English to young children and discovering French picture books were the triggers that led her into illustration. This is her fourth book to be published with Enchanted Lion Books.

I'll Go Home Then, It's Warm and Has Chairs. The Unpublished Emails.


David Thorne - 2012
    More everything. All new, never before published material from the author of The Internet is a Playground. New emails, new articles, new exclusive content. I'll Go Home Then; It's Warm and Has Chairs is the second book by New York Times Bestselling author David Thorne.

Coffee, Tea, the Gypsy & Me


Caroline James - 2012
    She purchases Kirkton House a run down guest house and, with the help of a colourful cast of locals, establishes a thriving country house hotel. She opens during Fair Week, a 300 year old gypsy tradition hated by the locals and loved by every tinker and traveller in the country. Romance is the last thing on her mind, until the enigmatic John Doherty walks into her life...

Unicorns Are Jerks: A Coloring Book Exposing the Cold, Hard, Sparkly Truth


Theo Nicole Lorenz - 2012
    Unicorns think they're so great because they're all mysterious and magical, but they can be real jerks sometimes.This coloring book features eighteen examples of unicorns texting in theaters, farting in elevators, eating your leftovers, and generally acting like jerks.

Uncle John's Fully Loaded 25th Anniversary Bathroom Reader (Uncle John's Bathroom Reader, #25)


Bathroom Readers' Institute - 2012
    This behemoth of a book is overflowing with the incredible stories, surprising facts, weird news, little-known origins, forgotten history, fun wordplay, and everything else that millions of loyal fans have come to expect from world’s best-selling bathroom reading series. As always, it’s divided by length: quickies for the reader on the go, medium-sized articles for those with a few minutes to spare, and extra-long pieces for those truly leg-numbing experiences. Here are just a few of the hundreds of topics loaded into this edition of America’s favorite "on the go” source of fascinating information:Forgotten FirstsDumb Crooks: Stoner EditionBizarre Japanese Video GamesThe Kamikaze Instruction ManualOur Lady of the Little Green MenThe Worst Fire in American HistoryThe World's Worst Business DecisionThe New Years Eve Opossum DropDo Blondes Really Have More Fun?Failed Doomsday PredictionsWhen Toilets Explodeand much much more

AAAA!: A FoxTrot Kids Edition


Bill Amend - 2012
    Revel in the sibling rivalry as oldest brother Peter dodges his homework and doesn't stop eating. Paige, the only girl amongst the siblings, continues her shopaholic, boyfriend-seeking antics. And Jason, the youngest, is geekier than ever, buildiing  robots and teaching his pet iguana, Quincy, how to annoy every member of the family. Throw into the mix,  sensible yet TV antenna-cutting mother, Andy, and backyard grilling disaster dad, Roger, and you have the perfect recipe for a family that every kid can relate to.

Brownie and the Dame


C.L. Bevill - 2012
    Possibly destruction, terror, pandemonium, and anarchy might follow, too! He’s got his hands on a fedora, a stack of hardboiled mystery novels, and is ready to squirt metal at the nearest evil perpetrator, even though his reliable stun gun has been appropriated. When Janie, the niece of Willodean Gray the beauteous sheriff’s deputy, shows up to participate, all heck breaks loose. There’s mysteriously missing stuff! There’s galvanized goings-on! There’s things a ten-year-old boy and an eight-year-old girl with a penchant for all-things police, want to get in on. Even Bubba and Miz Demetrice can’t stop the serious sleuthing of Brownie and the dame!This is a novella of about 34,000 words.

Alcatraz


Brandon Sanderson - 2012
    My purpose is to show you the truth about me, and to prove that I am not the hero that everyone says I am.In the Hushlands — those Librarian-controlled nations such as the United States, Canada, and England—this book will be published as a work of fantasy.Do not be fooled! This is no work of fiction, nor is my name really Brandon Sanderson.I know the events of my life may seem wondrous and mysterious. I will do my best to explain them, but please remember that my purpose is not to entertain you. My purpose it to open your eyes to the truth.This is my story—the story of a selfish, contemptible fool.The story of a coward.The story of Alcatraz Smedry.

The Secret of St. Claire


Robin Alexander - 2012
    Claire, Louisiana—at least on the outside. Beneath the veneer, it’s anything but. That’s the secret of St. Claire.Born and raised in St. Claire, Lindsay Juneau’s life was seemingly full raising a six-year-old daughter and caring for her widowed mother. Of course, things aren’t always what they seem, and the newest resident of St. Claire isn’t buying the ruse.Veterinarian Nicole Allen is looking for something different. She finds it in St. Claire with its hypochondriac rabbits, shotgun-toting shut-ins, and eclectic mix of people. The most alluring, though, is a woman who’s also looking for something different.

The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom


Christopher Healy - 2012
    Prince Frederic. Prince Duncan. Prince Gustav. You’ve never heard of them, have you? These are the princes who saved Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, and Rapunzel, respectively, and yet, thanks to those lousy bards who wrote the tales, you likely know them only as Prince Charming. But all of this is about to change.Rejected by their princesses and cast out of their castles, the princes stumble upon an evil plot that could endanger each of their kingdoms. Now it’s up to them to triumph over their various shortcomings, take on trolls, bandits, dragons, witches, and other assorted terrors, and become the heroes no one ever thought they could be.Christopher Healy’s Hero’s Guide to Saving Your Kingdom is a completely original take on the world of fairy tales, the truth about what happens after “happily ever after.” It’s a must-have for middle grade readers who enjoy their fantasy adventures mixed with the humor of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid books. Witty black-and-white drawings by Todd Harris add to the fun.

The Great Showdowns


Scott C. - 2012
    The epic clash of being against being. Han vs the green fellow. Chief Brody vs the very large shark. John McClane vs broken glass, and many, many more....Scott Campbell's acclaimed Great Showdowns series, showing strangely good-natured confrontations between his favorite movie characters, finally gets the book collection fans have been demanding!Whether it's Ripley vs the Alien Queen or Spinal Tap vs an undersized model of Stonehenge, these memorable moments of melee deserve to be celebrated. Behold, The Great Showdowns.

Fifty Shades of Chicken: A Parody in a Cookbook


F.L. Fowler - 2012
    Then you’ll know everything. It’s a cookbook,” he says and opens to some recipes, with color photos. “I want to prepare you, very much.” This isn’t just about getting me hot till my juices run clear, and then a little rest. There’s pulling, jerking, stuffing, trussing. Fifty preparations. He promises we’ll start out slow, with wine and a good oiling . . . Holy crap. “I will control everything that happens here,” he says. “You can leave anytime, but as long as you stay, you’re my ingredient.” I’ll be transformed from a raw, organic bird into something—what? Something delicious.  So begins the adventures of Miss Chicken, a young free-range, from raw innocence to golden brown ecstasy, in this spoof-in-a-cookbook that simmers in the afterglow of E.L. James’s sensational Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. Like Anastasia Steele, Miss Chicken finds herself at the mercy of a dominating man, in this case, a wealthy, sexy, and very hungry chef.  And before long, from unbearably slow drizzling to trussing, Miss Chicken discovers the sheer thrill of becoming the main course. A parody in three acts—“The Novice Bird” (easy recipes for roasters), “Falling to Pieces” (parts perfect for weeknight meals), and “Advanced Techniques” (the climax of cooking)—Fifty Shades of Chicken is a cookbook of fifty irresistible, repertoire-boosting chicken dishes that will leave you hungry for more.With memorable tips and revealing photographs, Fifty Shades of Chicken will have you dominating dinner.

Middle School: Get Me out of Here! - Free Preview


James Patterson - 2012
    He's been accepted to art school in the big city and imagines a math-and-history-free fun zone.Wrong! It's more competitive than Rafe ever expected, and to score big in class, he needs to find a way to turn his boring life into the inspiration for a work of art. His method? Operation: Get a Life! Anything he's never done before, he's going to do it, from learning to play poker to going to a modern art museum. But when his newest mission uncovers secrets about the family Rafe's never known, he has to decide if he's ready to have his world turned upside down. (Includes over 100 illustrations.)

Nancy Is Happy: Complete Dailies, 1943–1945


Ernie Bushmiller - 2012
    For many years, Ernie Bushmiller 's Nancy, with its odd-looking, squat heroine, nearly abstract art, and often super-corny gags, was perceived as the stodgiest, squarest comic strip in the world. Popular with newspaper readers, true but definitely not a strip embraced by comic-strip connoisseurs, like Krazy Kat, Dick Tracy or Terry and the Pirates. But then those connoisseurs took a closer look, and began to realize that Bushmiller 's art approached its own kind of cartoon perfection, and those corny gags often achieved a striking zen quality. In its own way, it turned out Nancy was in fact the most iconic comic strip of all. (The American Heritage Dictionary actually uses a Nancy strip to illustrate its entry on comic strip. ) Charter members of the Nancy revival include Art Spiegelman, who published Mark Newgarden 's famous Love 's Savage Fury (featuring Nancy and Bazooka Joe) in an early issue of RAW; Fletcher Hanks anthologist Paul Karasik; Zippy the Pinhead creator Bill Griffith; underground publisher Denis Kitchen, who released several volumes of Nancy collections in the 1980s; Understanding Comics Scott McCloud, who created the Five-Card Nancy card game; Joe Brainard, who produced an entire Nancy book of paintings in 2008; and Andy Warhol, who produced a painting based on Nancy. Beginning in the Winter of 2011, fans will be dancing with joy as Fantagraphics unveils an ongoing Nancy reprint project. Each volume contain a whopping full four years of daily Nancy strips (a Sunday Nancy project looms in the future), collected in a fat, square (what else, for the squarest strip in the world?) package designed by Jacob (Popeye, Beasts , Willie and Joe) Covey. This first volume will collect every daily strip from 1943 to 1946. (Fantagraphics will eventually release Nancy 's first five years, 1938-1942, but given the scarcity of archival material for these years we are giving ourselves some extra time to collate it all.) This first Nancy volume will feature an introduction by another stellar Bushmiller fan, Daniel Clowes (from whose collection most of the strips in this volume were scanned), a biography of the artist, and much more.

Finding Out What the Bad Boy Fights For


spilsder - 2012
    Swing left. 2. Swing right.3. Dodge.4. Tackle.5. Laugh as he lies there, nearly unconscious.6. Make some form of comment: "God, even your mum lasted longer than you last night."7. Walk off, leaving the victim in question groaning in pain.Jacob Moore street fights every day. He has a routine: he fights, he laughs, he walks away. He doesn't do friends, and he's known around school as their 'bad boy'. Kara...well Kara doesn't have a title, but she does manage to humiliate herself daily, using her natural talent of word vomit and verbal diarrhoea. So when the two run into each other (quite literally) it creates something interesting, dangerous, and something, that's just a little bit like love.

One Cool Friend


Toni Buzzeo - 2012
    It's just proper enough for a straight-laced boy like him. And when he asks his father if he may have one (please and thank you), his father says yes. Elliot should have realized that Dad probably thought he meant a stuffed penguin and not a real one . . . Clever illustrations and a wild surprise ending make this sly, silly tale of friendship and wish fulfillment a kid-pleaser from start to finish.

A Is for Musk Ox


Erin Cabatingan - 2012
    A is for musk ox because musk oxen are annoying and always about as aggravating as absolutely anyone alive.

Texts from Dog


October Jones - 2012
    Yeah. It’s weird. When October Jones figured out he could send text messages to himself on his mobile phone, he naturally decided that the best use of this discovery was to send passive-aggressive messages to himself under the guise of his bulldog. And so the exasperating, slightly delusional, and utterly endearing Dog and his alter-ego BatDog were born.Texts from Dog features Dog’s attempts to keep the neighborhood safe from the likes of Mr. Postman and his arch-nemesis Cat-Cat—he has managed to only smash three TVs and a patio door in the process. And in between crime fighting sprees and run-ins with the squirrel mafia, there are romantic interludes with pillows, fetch sessions gone terribly awry, and the abusive banter only a bromance between man and his text-savvy dog can spawn.For those of us who have ever had a conversation with a pet in our heads, Texts from Dog will make you laugh out loud and perhaps even make you think twice about leaving your pet home alone for the day.

Oh No, George!


Chris Haughton - 2012
    And his owner, Harry, has all the best hopes that George will be a well-behaved dog when he leaves him alone for the day. But when George spies a delicious cake sitting on the kitchen table, his resolve starts to waver. You see, George loves cake. . . . Uh-oh. What to do now? It’s so hard to be a good dog when there are cats to chase and flowers to dig up! What ever will Harry say when he gets back? Chris Haughton’s fetchingly funny story and vibrant, retro illustrations are sure to lure dog lovers of all ages — and anyone who has ever met a temptation too good to resist.

Monty Python's Flying Circus: Complete and Annotated - All the Bits


Luke Dempsey - 2012
    Python's influence on comedy has been compared to the Beatles' influence on music. This landmark work collects the complete scripts for every one of the 45 episodes of "Flying Circus" every silly setup, every clever conceit, every snide insult, and ever saucy aside from these classic skits, including "The Ministry of Silly Walks," "The Dead Parrot," "Banter in the Cheese Shop," "Spam, the Funniest Joke in the World," "The Spanish Inquisition," "The Argument Clinic," "The Fish-Slapping Dance," "The Lumberjack Song," and all the rest.Every script is thoroughly annotated with notes that cover the plethora of cultural, historical, and topical references touched upon in each sketch. Sidebars and commentary throughout include profiles of the principles -- Graham Chapman, Eric Idle, Terry Jones, Michael Palin, Terry Gilliam, and John Cleese -- and interviews with the cast and crew; fascinating facts about technical concerns, set design, and shooting locations; insider stores from on and off the set, including arguments, accidents, and practical jokes; goofs and gaffes; and much more. Also included are thousands of stills and artwork from the shows.

Bloom County: The Complete Digital Library, Vol. 2


Berkeley Breathed - 2012
    Berkeley Breathed’s Bloom County burst onto the American comic scene in December 1980 and it soon became one of the most popular comic strips of all time. The endearing and quirky denizens of the strip included Milo Bloom, Steve Dallas, Michael Binkley, Cutter John, Bill the Cat, and Opus the Penguin. Bloom County was a strip that dealt with many issues relevant to the period. Occasional “Context comments” are added throughout this collection, giving the reader a greater understanding of the time. This is the first time Bloom County has been collected in a digital library. IDW will add more volumes, one year per volume. Each newspaper strip is reproduced in chronological order from first to last. Great effort has been made to ensure the highest production values are achieved.

Ungifted


Gordon Korman - 2012
    It's usually more like Don't try this at home. So when the troublemaker pulls a major prank at his middle school, he thinks he's finally gone too far. But thanks to a mix-up by one of the administrators, instead of getting in trouble, Donovan is sent to the Academy of Scholastic Distinction (ASD), a special program for gifted and talented students.It wasn't exactly what Donovan had intended, but there couldn't be a more perfect hideout for someone like him. That is, if he can manage to fool people whose IQs are above genius level. And that becomes harder and harder as the students and teachers of ASD grow to realize that Donovan may not be good at math or science (or just about anything). But after an ongoing experiment with a live human (sister), an unforgettably dramatic middle-school dance, and the most astonishing come-from-behind robot victory ever, Donovan shows that his gifts might be exactly what the ASD students never knew they needed.

Goldilocks and Just One Bear


Leigh Hodgkinson - 2012
    One day, Little Bear wanders out of the woods and finds himself lost in the Big City. Will he find the city too noisy? Too quiet? Or just right? And what are the chances of him bumping in to someone who remembers exactly how he likes his porridge?

Big Nate Fun Blaster: Cheezy Doodles, Crazy Comix, and Loads of Laughs!


Lincoln Peirce - 2012
    Soon to be an animated series from Nickelodeon! Diary of a Wimpy Kid author Jeff Kinney says, "Big Nate is funny, big time!"Big Nate Fun Blaster will rock your socks off! This second Big Nate themed activity book is bursting with awesome all new activities for Nate fans, including trivia quizzes, super sudoku puzzles, crackable codes, create-your-own comics, amazing mazes, poetry slams, ridiculous rhymes, marvelous Mad Libs, and much more.Nate's New York Times bestselling world comes to life with a ton of black-and-white illustrations…some of which YOU get to create!Big Nate Fun Blaster is a great addition to the bestselling collection of Big Nate books, sure to be enjoyed by all fans of Big Nate.

My Husband and Other Animals


Janaki Lenin - 2012
    So he discarded his watch and shoes, and stripped down to a loin cloth. Not the best attire for his first brush with the devil nettle!Whats it like being married to Rom Whitaker herpetologist, wildlife conservationist, and founder of the Madras Snake Park and Madras Crocodile Bank? Janaki Lenin, his wife, tells us, Theres never a dull moment.In this compilation of stories, Janaki also an animal enthusiast gives us a peek into the zany and unpredictable world that Rom and she have built together, deep in southern India. They battle tree frogs that insist on colonising their house, travel to the wilds of the world pursuing venomous snakes and monster crocodiles, devote precious hours to befriending Gila monsters, playing with porcupines, and taming opinionated shrews.Entertaining, playful, and downright amusing, the essays shed light on the kingdoms of beasts and plants. They provide flashes of insight into animal disposition relate human stories about the world and our place in it, and demystify natures secret code. Most of all, they highlight Rom and Janakis wide-eyed wonder at sharing this diverse planet with all creatures, large and small.About the AuthorJanaki Lenin has always had an interest in animals but living with Rom took it to the stratospheric level. They lived in the Madras Crocodile Bank for a few years, surrounded by thousands of crocodiles, snakes, turtles, and lizards. Rom and Janaki made documentaries about wildlife in wild places for a living.When they moved to their farm in rural Tamil Nadu, Janaki thought it would be a perfect retreat after the many arduous months of filming. Instead, a whole new set of challenges popped up from pesky tree frogs and adamant Russells vipers to a dog-eating leopard. She thinks shes made her peace with the many wild creatures who have staked claim to their farm, but who knows what tomorrow may bring. Rom and Janaki live with four dogs, a pair of emus, a flock of geese, and a pig. Its her childhood dream come true.

Swallows & Robins - The Guests In My Garden


Susie Kelly - 2012
    A riotous account of the world’s worst housewife’s efforts at running two holiday homes in remotest France and her love/hate relationship with her guests.

The Joy of Hate: How to Triumph over Whiners in the Age of Phony Outrage


Greg Gutfeld - 2012
    At the root of every single major political conflict is the annoying coddling Americans must endure of these harebrained liberal hypocrisies. In fact, most of the time liberals uses the mantle of tolerance as a guise for their pathetic intolerance. And what we really need is smart intolerance, or as Gutfeld reminds us, what we used to call common sense.The Joy of Hate tackles this conundrum head on--replacing the idiocy of open-mindness with a shrewd judgmentalism that rejects stupid ideas, notions, and people. With countless examples grabbed from the headlines, Gutfeld provides readers with the enormous tally of what pisses us all off. For example:- The double standard: You can make fun of Christians, but God forbid Muslims. It's okay to call a woman any name imaginable, as long as she's a Republican. And no problem if you're a bigot, as long as you're politically correct about it. - The demonizing of the Tea Party and romanticizing of the Occupy Wall Streeters. - The media who are always offended (see MSNBC lineup)- How critics of Obamacare or illegal immigration are somehow immediately labeled racists. - The endless debate over the Ground Zero Mosque (which Gutfeld planned to open a Muslim gay bar next to). - As well as pretentious music criticism, slow-moving ceiling fans, and snotty restaurant hostesses. Funny and sarcastic to the point of being mean (but in a nice way), The Joy of Hate points out the true jerks in this society and tells them all off.

Chicken Soup for the Soul: I Can't Believe My Cat Did That!: 101 Stories about the Crazy Antics of Our Feline Friends


Jack Canfield - 2012
    What a great gift for cat lovers.What has that cat done now? You’ll see your own cat in this entertaining collection of stories about the incredible things that cats do. From cats that save lives to cats with nine lives—from cats that diagnose cancer to cats that care for the sick—from escape artists to cats that find their way home from miles away—you won’t believe what you’re reading. You’ll see your own cat with new eyes after reading these true stories about: cats with an uncanny understanding of spoken language cats with amazing intuition and empathy cats that act like people... or like dogs cats that outsmart their humans cats that care for other animals... and have their own pets cats performing acts of heroism and saving lives cats that play tricks and have a sense of humor

Fools Rush in Where Monkeys Fear to Tread


Carl R. Trueman - 2012
    A compelling, challenging, and sometimes uproarious look at how the world and the church intersect.Like Luther before him, Trueman understands the power of humor because he understands the absurdity of human self-regard in the context of the fallen world. And like Luther, Trueman shows no mercy, either to his enemies or to himself. His writings are an oasis of welcome wit in what can so often seem like a desert of Protestant pomposity.

Garbage Pail Kids


Art Spiegelman - 2012
    The result was an inspired collaboration between avant-garde cartoonists and humorists including Art Spiegelman, Mark Newgarden, John Pound, Tom Bunk, and Jay Lynch. A new generation of fans continues to embrace this pop-culture phenomenon as Garbage Pail Kids stickers are still being published. Now, for the first time, all 206 rare and hard-to-find images from Series 1 through 5 are collected in an innovative package, along with a special set of four limited-edition, previously unreleased bonus stickers. This exciting follow up to Wacky Packages is guaranteed to appeal to die-hard collectors as well as a new generation of fans.

A Blink of the Screen: Collected Shorter Fiction


Terry Pratchett - 2012
    Here for the first time are his short stories and other short form fiction collected into one volume. A Blink of the Screen charts the course of Pratchett's long writing career: from his schooldays through to his first writing job on the Bucks Free Press,; to the origins of his debut novel, The Carpet People; and on again to the dizzy mastery of the phenomenally successful Discworld series.Here are characters both familiar and yet to be discovered; abandoned worlds and others still expanding; adventure, chickens, death, disco and, actually, some quite disturbing ideas about Christmas,all of it shot through with his inimitable brand of humour.With an introduction by Booker Prize-winning author A.S. Byatt, illustrations by the late Josh Kirby and drawings by the author himself, this is a book to treasure.

Switch! The Lost Kingdoms of Karibu


Karen Prince - 2012
    Trouble is brewing in Karibu and Gogo Maya and her leopard are about to make matters worse. Their risky ‘switching’ trick has jettisoned them right out of the secret realm, sucking a teenager from the ordinary world into the mess they left behind them.Ethan Flynn is pretty useless in the African bush but at least he knows how to do CPR . . . and that’s when he finds out you shouldn’t do it on a witch. The one he just rescued from drowning says she switched places with his cousin and now Ethan has sucked up all her magical powers, leaving her too weak to switch back again. It must be true. Joe has vanished into thin air, Ethan’s feeling all unhinged, and the old woman’s leopard is communicating its thoughts straight into his head. . . . alarming thoughts about teaming up with fearsome characters and traveling into dark places; disturbing thoughts about Joe in terrible danger unless Ethan learns to use the magic in time to rescue him.That’s if Ethan himself can survive . . .

Mindjack Trilogy Box Set


Susan Kaye Quinn - 2012
    Sixteen-year-old Kira Moore is a zero, someone who can't read thoughts or be read by others. Zeros are outcasts who can't be trusted, leaving her no chance with Raf, a regular mindreader and the best friend she secretly loves. When she accidentally controls Raf's mind and nearly kills him, Kira tries to hide her frightening new ability from her family and an increasingly suspicious Raf. But lies tangle around her, and she's dragged deep into a hidden underworld of mindjackers, where having to mind control everyone she loves is just the beginning of the deadly choices before her. TOP 5 FINALIST for 2012 Best Indie Book, Young Adult Fiction - The Kindle Book ReviewOpen MindsWhen everyone reads minds, a secret is a dangerous thing to keep.Closed HeartsWhen you control minds, only your heart can be used against you.Free SoulsWhen your mind is a weapon, freedom comes at a price.The Mindjack Trilogy contains the first three novels of the Mindjack Saga, a young adult science fiction series. There are three novels in the original trilogy, five novellas that accompany the series, and plans for another trilogy in the works (see Susan’s latest novella, The Locksmith, for a peek at a new Mindjack character for the coming trilogy – or better yet, subscribe to her newsletter, and get The Locksmith for free!).READING ORDERMindjack Trilogy (novels): Open Minds, Closed Hearts, Free SoulsMindjack Origins (shorts): Mind Games, The Handler, The Scribe, KeeperThe Locksmith is a standalone novella that can be read independently of the trilogy and novellas.

Getting Away from Already Being Pretty Much Away from It All: An Essay


David Foster Wallace - 2012
    In this hilarious essay, originally published in the collection A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again, he ventures to the Illinois State Fair, where he examines butter sculptures, munches on corndogs, and swaps stories with local exhibitors. As he wanders through this endlessly fascinating world, Wallace's one-of-a-kind blend of humor and insight is on full display. "Getting Away from Already Being Pretty Much Away from It All" is an uproarious and ultimately unforgettable foray into a classic part of American life and culture.

Some Things Shouldn't Be a Chore (In Which Tony Stark Builds Himself Some Friends


Scifigrl47 - 2012
    Tony's got people he pays to take care of that kind of thing, and anyway, he's pretty sure that he's going to die of some exotic disease in his workshop, because Dummy's still a little spotty about what is 'clean' enough to put on an open wound. The rest of the Avengers are in this for personal gain, except for Clint, he just enjoys being a dick.And some things shouldn't be a chore.

Jasotron: 2012: A FoxTrot Collection


Bill Amend - 2012
    Peter, Paige, and Jason, along with parents Roger and Andy, comment on the latest Hollywood fads, gaming fixations, and familial fascinations. As the 27th FoxTrot comic collection, Jasontron: 2012 features all full-color Sunday strips published from September 2009 to Spring 2012. Jason continues to craft exploits at Paige’s expense, while Peter suits up for the next big game. Parents Roger and Andy keep up with their children’s antics, as Roger vigilantly monitors his hairline and his burrito intake, along with Andy’s attempts to create Peeps from tofu and saffron. With appearances in the New York Times crossword puzzle and on television’s Jeopardy! and The Sopranos, FoxTrot frequently finds itself an integral part of the popular culture that it so often critiques.

Inside Asperger's Looking Out


Kathy Hoopmann - 2012
    Through engaging text and full-colour photographs, this book shows neurotypicals how Aspies see and experience the world.Each page brings to light traits that many Aspies have in common, from sensitive hearing and an aversion to bright lights and strong smells, to literal thinking and difficulty understanding social rules and reading body language and facial expressions. At the same time, the book highlights and celebrates the unique characteristics that make those with Asperger's Syndrome special.This is the perfect introduction to the world of Aspies, told from their own perspective, for the people in their lives including family, friends, and classmates. Those with Asperger's Syndrome will also appreciate this book for the way it shares their own singular perspectives on life.

Rontel


Sam Pink - 2012
    Follow him as he attempts to go to his last day of work. Follow him through the subway as he considers stealing chips from a dancing baby. Find him being threatened by a homeless man holding board games. Take his hand as he considers building a hydraulic cocoon for his cat out of a complimentary duffel bag. Walk the streets of Uptown as a cop-killer takes hostages to the roof of an apartment building. Meet his friends. Just kidding! Follow him to his neighbor’s apartment where he gets paid in pumpkin pie to watch a baby. Follow him through through the dull pains of never quite becoming an adult. Sit back, laugh, smile, hold your breath, because not even he knows how it ends.“Funny as hell, searingly honest, and urgently real, Sam Pink’s Rontel puts to shame most modern fiction. His writing perfectly captures the bizarre parade that is Chicago, with all its gloriously odd and wonderful people. This book possesses both the nerve of Nelson Algren and the existential comedy of Albert Camus.” – Joe Meno

Furry United Coalition Bundle


Eve Langlais - 2012
    It continued with a geeky swan and her playboy bear. And then we encountered an ornery croc who couldn't help falling for a foxy lady.The three F.U.C. stories you've come to love are now available in one handy bundle. Hours of romantic and humorous entertainment. Contains previously released stories:• Bunny and the Bear• Swan and the Bear• Croc and the FoxIsn't it time you got F.U.C.'d? lol. Find out what has readers giggling and get your Furry United Coalition bundle today.

Big Maria


Johnny Shaw - 2012
    His novel Big Maria is an unfiltered, wild romp in which three men get one chance to find a lost gold mine; the only problem is the Big Maria Mine is right in the middle of a US Army artillery range.There’s gold in them thar hills—or more precisely, in Arizona’s Chocolate Mountains, where one hundred years ago a miner stashed a king’s ransom of the stuff. But times have changed. The world has changed. And now the Chocolate Mountains are the home of the largest military artillery range in the world.Harry’s living on disability and getting liquored up and beaten down. Frank’s a feisty old-timer battling cancer and a domineering daughter. And Ricky’s a good kid in a bad spot, doing everything for family. Together they’re staking what little they have left on a dangerous quest to the Big Maria Mine—and the gold that can offer them a new beginning.Unfortunately a meth-dealing biker wants a piece, a trigger-happy AWOL soldier wants to play chicken in a live minefield, two stubborn burros want to go home, a starving mountain lion wants his dinner, and the US Army wants to rain on our heroes’ parade with real bombs.When you’re all out of crazy ideas, you’ve got to try the stupid ones.

We Hope You Like This Song: An Overly Honest Story about Friendship, Death, and Mix Tapes


Bree Housley - 2012
    Their friendship survived everything from the awkward years of junior high to the transformative upheavals of early adulthood—until, at the young age of 25, Shelly lost her life to complications caused by Preeclampsia.We Hope You Like This Song is a tribute to the ineffable, incomparable bond that we call friendship, and a celebration of living life to the fullest. Housley recounts how she and her sister found a way to keep Shelly’s memory alive—by spending a year doing crazy things that Shelly would have done, like giving Valentines to strangers, singing at a karaoke bar, and letting her boyfriend pick out her outfits for a week. In the process, she paints a vivid, often hilarious, portrait of her fun-loving, social butterfly best friend and the many adventures they had growing up together in '80s and ’90s small-town America. Sweet, poignant, and yet somehow laugh-out-loud funny, We Hope You Like This Song is a touching story of love, loss, and the honoring of a friendship after it’s gone.

My Laughable Life with Garfield: The Jon Arbuckle Chronicles


Jim Davis - 2012
    Through classic comics, blog entries, and a wealth of other wacky new material, experience Jon’s dating disasters, phone call faux pas, wardrobe malfunctions, and mirthful mishaps—and cheer the geek with a heart of gold as he finally finds true love with Liz, the veterinarian. (Who’d have thunk it?) So, rejoice, Jon fans, and enjoy the fun. The moment of goof has arrived!

Seeing Trouble


Ann Charles - 2012
    It was originally titled Dear Diary in Deadwood and was part of a Valentine’s Day anthology with several other authors’ works. In addition to this short story, I’ve included the original character interview I did with Violet prior to writing the first book that introduced us to her wild world. I threw in some Deadwood illustrations by C.S. Kunkle that many of you have probably not seen before. Finally, I included a short story called Candy Lover that I pulled from my short story vault. It has nothing to do with Violet and Deadwood, but it’s a story that I felt might put a smile on your face. - Ann Charles

Weird Al: The Book


Nathan Rabin - 2012
    What do you do when someone's sold more comedy recordings than any other artist in history? How do you commemorate over three decades' worth of live concerts and groundbreaking music videos? And what's a fitting way to celebrate a slew of Grammy-award-winning albums and singles of brilliant satire? You write a book - a big, fat, career retrospective book, that's what!This comprehensive illustrated tribute to the undisputed king of pop-culture parody, "Weird Al" Yankovic, covers his songs, videos, performances, and life story in words and pictures, including phot captions, tweets, lists and an introduction by the man himself.Weird Al: The Book is the fitting companion piece to an extraordinary career.

Dancing with Jesus: Featuring a Host of Miraculous Moves


Sam Stall - 2012
    Salvation is at hand. Singing hymns of praise is standard practice-now it's time to set your feet a-tapping with a collection of original dance moves inspired by Jesus and the likes of Moses and John the Baptist. Dances include: the Water Walk, the Temptation Tango, the Judas Hustle, and The Apostolic Conga. Each dance move is outlined with: how to, inspiration, and an illustration. Slyly irreverent but ultimately festive, Dancing with Jesus is illustrated in full color. Best of all, two of the dances are animated for full effect by a lenticular cover and last-spread finale, making this a truly one-of-a-kind novelty item! As the Bible says in Ecclesiastes, there is, "A time to weep, a time to laugh, a time to mourn, a time to dance."

Big Mean Mike


Michelle Knudsen - 2012
    He has a big, mean car that he likes to drive around the big, mean streets. Everyone knows that Mike is big and mean, and that’s just the way he likes it. But one day a tiny, fuzzy bunny shows up in his car. Mike can’t believe it! Before anyone can see, he puts the bunny down on the sidewalk and drives away. When the tiny, fuzzy bunny shows up again — and this time brings a friend — Mike tells them both to get lost. Big mean dogs do not hang out with tiny, fuzzy bunnies! But gosh, those bunnies sure are cute. . . . From best-selling author Michelle Knudsen and illustrator Scott Magoon comes a comical lesson about how keeping up your image is not nearly as fun as being your own quirky self.

The Protectors: Vigilante Justice


Bernard Lee DeLeo - 2012
    Bradwick snaps when he and James bust in on a kidnapping ring, enslaving children for pornography. He brutally executes the three kidnappers, stunning James. He sets up the scene to pass for self-defense with Ellie James cooperation. Their ruse succeeds, triggering a two cop crackdown on crime the city of Oakland’s leaders scurry to stop. Dedicated to end ‘look the other way’ crime suppression tactics, ending in destruction and death for the common people in Oakland, Bradwick and James decide it’s time to go on offense.Connor explains it this way after they rescue the kidnapped children, “The kids made me start thinking about how I want folks to look at us. I don’t care anymore to visit someone to tell them we found the people who broke into their business or house and robbed them blind. I want them to wave at us from their house or business as we go by because we prevent the gangbangers, drug dealers and thugs from terrorizing them.”The crime war takes on different meaning when they bust an MS-13 El Salvadoran gangster’s illegal alien processing center. Connor and Ellie run headlong into a corrupt politician on the gangster’s payroll, and the terrorists behind him. Soon, everyday crime fighting busts become a fond memory. (Taken from Amazon.com)

Good News, Bad News


Jeff Mack - 2012
    Bad news, it is starting to rain. Good news, Rabbit has an umbrella. Bad news, the stormy winds blow the umbrella (and Mouse!) into a tree.So begins this clever story about two friends with very different dispositions. Using just four words, Jeff Mack has created a text with remarkable flair that is both funny and touching, and pairs perfectly with his energetic, and hilarious, illustrations.Good news, this is a book kids will clamor to read again and again!

Earthling!


Mark Fearing - 2012
    Unfortunately that means everyone thinks he's a pro at anti-gravity Zero-Ball (even though he's really only a pro at watching sports). And with paranoid Principal Lepton threat ening to expel any Earthlings (into outer space) and only Gort's hacked Blip computer to help them determine Earth's co-ordinates, will Bud ever find his way home?

Berkeley Breathed's Outland: The Complete Collection


Berkeley Breathed - 2012
    Debuting just four weeks after the final Bloom County was published, and with many of the same cast members, Outland continues on in the same traditions set forth by its forebears -- ranging from delightful whimsy to raging satire! This volume contains every Outland strip published, some never-before-collected in book form, and nearly all have been scanned from the original art, provided by Breathed from his personal archives. More than 280 Sunday pages, all in fully remastered color, from September 3, 1989 through March 26, 1995. As an added bonus, this volume will have a selection of the extremely rare Academia Waltz, the college strip Breathed did as a precursor to Bloom County!

Pharisectomy: How to Joyfully Remove Your Inner Pharisee and other Religiously Transmitted Diseases


Peter Haas - 2012
    With an entertaining blend of social-scientist-meets-sage, Peter Haas provides a penetrating look at our faith that just might reveal our own "hidden Pharisees." Through a series of autopsies, Haas bypasses the cheap "church-make-over solutions" and cuts straight to our deepest need: a Pharisectomy.

Stella Batts Needs a New Name


Courtney Sheinmel - 2012
    She is eight-years old and she loves to write. She loves to write lists; like her favorite things and kids in her class. And she's writing her autobiography ("That means it's all about me"). Stella's favorite color is yellow and she LOVES fudge. As a matter of fact, there is a special fudge counter at her family's candy store because fudge is one of her favorite things to eat!But Stella has just one problem----her name. A boy from her class keeps calling her "SMELLA" after she trips on their class nature walk ("I don't even want to say what I landed in, it was too gross, so I'm going to leave out that partIn this early chapter book series, the ups and downs of Stella's life are charmingly chronicled.

The Fly


Elise Gravel - 2012
    It covers such topics as the hair on the fly's body (requires a lot of shaving), its ability to walk on the ceiling (it's pretty cool, but it's hard to play soccer up there), and its really disgusting food tastes (garbage juice soup followed by dirty diaper with rotten tomato sauce, for example). Although silly and off-the-wall, The Fly contains real information that will tie in with curriculum.

Chloe and the Lion


Mac Barnett - 2012
    But one fateful day, she gets lost in the woods on her way home, and a large dragon leaps out from-"Wait! It's supposed to be a lion," says Mac Barnett, the author of this book. But Adam Rex, the illustrator, thinks a dragon would be so much cooler (don't you agree?). Mac's power of the pen is at odds with Adam's brush, and Chloe's story hangs in the balance. Can she help them out of this quandary to be the heroine of her own story? Mac Barnett and Adam Rex are a dynamic duo, and two of the strongest contemporary voices in picture books today. In an accessible and funny way, Chloe and the Lion talks about the creative process and the joys and trials of collaboration.

Know Not Why


Hannah Johnson - 2012
    After all, girls love a sensitive guy, and what's more sensitive than dedicating your life to selling yarn and ... stuff? (Okay, so maybe it'd be a good idea to actually learn what one sells at an arts 'n crafts store.) But things don't go exactly according to plan. Coworker #1 is Cora: tiny, much-pierced, and way too fierce to screw with in any sense. Coworker #2 is Kristy: blonde, bubbly, unattainable perfection. And Coworker #3 is, well, Arthur. It goes without saying that he’s not an option. Right?… Right?Yeah, Howie’s life just got straight up confusing.Pun intended.

5 Temptation Killers


Hank Smith - 2012
    Quoting from Dumbledore, Hank Smith reminds us that “it is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” Unfortunately, we don’t always make the best choices. “We are all going to be tempted and sometimes we might give in and fall,” says Brother Smith, “but we don’t have to.” Drawing on stories from the scriptures, real-life examples, and his trademark sense of humor, Brother Smith shares five powerful “temptation killers” that can help youth deal with the “opposition in all things” that is part of our earthly existence. “I want to give you some ways to overcome temptations so you can become the missionary you were meant to be, so you can become the mom you were meant to be, so you can become the example you were meant to be if you can get by these things,” says Brother Smith. Once again, Hank Smith delivers a timely message that will be a great blessing for youth and parents alike.

The Stinking: A Get Fuzzy Treasury


Darby Conley - 2012
    In this microcosm of nerdy vegan Rob Wilco's apartment life abide his sociopathic cat Bucky and his guileless but often perceptive dog Satchel (and, yes, they are named after famed Negro Leagues baseball players). Their interactions and domestic repartee not only appeals to pet lovers but also to any cartoon fan who gets a kick out of the idiosyncrasies of life between any co-dwellers.Be afraid, be very afraid. Bucky B. Katt continues his reign of terror over his Get Fuzzy roommates, Satchel the pooch and Rob the human, in The Stinking. In addition to rants about his anticow crusade, Bucky also berates global warming as global stinking. Always on the defense against a monkey invasion, Bucky is armed with his own self-made arsenal of creative weaponry.It’s one strange and scary little household in the apartment that Rob, Bucky, and the lumpy canine Satchel share. Mild-mannered Rob can barely manage Bucky, who some might say is deranged, and Satchel, who usually ends up being the patsy. In this treasury, which includes all the cartoons from Masters of the Nonsenseverse and Survival of the Filthiest, Darby Conley once again morphs the human–pet relationship into one that humorously reminds us of our own weird human relationships.

Zombie Attack!!!


Robert Bevan - 2012
    They go out for what's meant to be a simple zombie hunt and get in way over their heads.

Skippyjon Jones: Cirque de Olé


Judy Schachner - 2012
    There are many acts to see, but only Skippito the Strong can perform the trickiest stunt of all. Judy Schachner's vivacious art and riotous text make for mucho read-aloud fun.Come one, come all--with Skippyjon Jones as the circus star, the Greatest Show on Earth just got even better!Includes a CD of the author reading!