When a mysterious phantom enters his life, he sets himself on a quest to discover the true meaning of lummoxness, and what he learns along the way is both shocking and hilarious.Written with honesty and selfeffacing wry humor, Lummox is an exceptional story of manhood at a time of its redefinition, a book that will leave you laughing out loud in recognition and cheering for lummoxes everywhere.

    The Forrest Gump of the funeral industry, Abbott was everywhere celebrities died, from helping to prepare Marilyn Monroe’s body for burial to standing next to Christopher Walken at Natalie Wood’s funeral. Now in his memoir “Pardon My Hearse,” Abbott tells the rags-to-shroud story of how we went from a young man with a hearse to the funeral driver to the stars—a rollicking, unexpectedly hilarious story of glamorous funerals, mishaps with corpses, and true-life glimpses of celebrities at their most revealing moments. ”Pardon My Hearse” is an eye-opening look at secret Hollywood from the man who literally knows where the bodies are buried.

    Flip-flops are optional. All of your favorite hilarious Fun Stories gathered together in one place! Plus, extended versions of many of your laugh out loud favorites. PRAISE FOR FUN STORIES: “The offbeat & heartwarming humor kept me turning pages due to its rollicking adventures in every chapter. Your friends, loved ones, and co-workers will enjoy it too." "It's very funny and on point observational humor” “Has me laughing from beginning to end” "Similar to Dave Barry, Eric Idle, and Stephen Colbert's humor" “This guy's funny and charmingly off the wall” "Always thought coffee could get me through the midweek blues, but this blows it out of the water" "I love Fun Stories. Fantastic!" "Awesome stuff, really enjoyed the horse names. Great read." "Excellent and hilarious material here" INCLUDES ALL OF THESE AND MANY MORE: "Chick-fil-A Makes Me Feel Like Leonardo DiCaprio" "The Least Amount of Fame Possible (Old MacDonald)" "Cub Scout Dropout" "Not the Next Carrie Underwood" "Bigfoot Popcorn" "Gatorade For Your Soul" "Shamelessly Suggestive City Names" "I'm the Freakin' Michael Phelps of Googling" "Alright, Alright, Alright!" "Mind Game of Thrones" "Happy Friday (Mr. Pee Man)" "Clown Commuter Award" "How NASA Thins The Herd" "Crunchy Roads, Take Me Home" "Good Folks, Bad Coaching" "Ultimate Waitress Revenge" "Battle of the Bands" You'll be smiling for hours as the pages turn themselves. Three Fun Stories books have hit #1 on Amazon Humor. Five audio tracks from this book have hit the top 10 on the iTunes comedy chart. Click to download the book and start the fun! Need more info? If you enjoy the humor of these folks, you'll love reading Fun Stories Greatest Hits: Dave Barry, Dilbert, David Sedaris, Stephen Colbert, Carl Hiaasen, Christopher Moore, Jim Gaffigan, Tina Fey, Amy Poehler, Jerry Seinfeld, Eric Idle, Erma Bombeck, Sebastian Maniscalco, Mindy Kaling, Jen Lancaster, Amy Lyle, The Far Side, Kevin Allison, Rainn Wilson, B.J. Novak, Sloane Crosley, Jimmy Fallon, Steve Martin, Judd Apatow, Adam Mansbach, Justin Halpern, Reader’s Digest, Dad Jokes, Garfield, Saturday Night Live, Friends, and The Office. Download Fun Stories Greatest Hits to start your next comedy adventure! Enjoy Fun Stories video posts at www.facebook.com/FunStoriesSeries. Get a free Fun Pack at www.mentalkickball.com. HUMOR, HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT, PARENTING & FAMILIES, PARODIES, SATIRE, ESSAYS, SHORT STORIES, CELEBRITY & POPULAR CULTURE, COMEDY, CULTURAL, ETHNIC & REGIONAL, CARTOONS, JOKES & RIDDLES, MEN, WOMEN & RELATIONSHIPS, TRAVEL, POP CULTURE, RADIO, TELEVISION, PERFORMING ARTS, FUNNY BOOKS, HUMOR ESSAYS, FUNNY SHORT STORIES, FUNNY MEMOIR, HUMOR MEMOIR, FUNNY BOOK CLUB BOOKS, FUNNY ESSAYS, HUMOR BOOKS, HUMOROUS BOOKS, GIFTS FOR DAD, FUNNY GIFTS, LAUGH, LAUGH OUT LOUD, FUN, FUN, FUN, MORE COWBELL COWBELL

    Having longed for children since before she can remember, she was suddenly faced with an array of unfamiliar, unexpected and sometimes downright embarrassing emotional and physical reactions. And when Poppy (and a year later Daisy) was born she had to learn a whole new set of skills.From trying to conceive and a first positive pregnancy test to Poppy's first birthday, Minus Nine To One takes you through the worries, surprises, excitement, miracles and sheer bloody hard work that Jools - and all new mums in their own different ways - have to cope with along the way. As Jools writes, 'This certainly isn't meant to be read as a guidebook, or a medical reference book - it is simply my story and I hope that you can relate to it in some way (and maybe even relax with it in the bath!).'Down to earth, personal and very, very funny, this is the book no aspiring mother will want to be without.

    Pills’ Pharmacy Hub comes a book about some of the wildest customers that pharmacists have dealt with in retail pharmacy. Journey into the world of retail pharmacy with 80 hilarious short stories: a world where people are not that bright but always think they are right, and where the word patience doesn’t exist. A world with druggies coming up with some not-so-clever schemes to get their fix. A world where people think throwing ice cream in your face is an acceptable way to get your attention. A world with a new twist at every turn--just when you think you’ve seen everything, someone always finds a way to surprise you.

    She knew instantly that her decision to work in general practice was the ‘biggest and worst mistake of her life’. Fortunately, however, this did not deter her from continuing in general practice, and this fascinating memoir (spanning half a century) is testament to her resilience and professionalism, as well as her pragmatic and charismatic personality. She shares real stories about real people in this intriguing book. Some stories are truly heart-breaking and will have you reaching for the tissues (such as the times when she has lost patients, and encountered and supported abused children and rape victims). But it isn’t all serious. There are lots of light-hearted and heart-warming moments too, such as the stories about Jessie-dog – her bodyguard when she made home visits, and the time when she helped a large (and desperately in need) family to get rehoused, and her time as a country GP. She also recalls with honesty and candidness, the prejudice and unimaginable pressure she had to contend with, as a young female GP in the 1960s. As well as a plethora of fascinating stories, experiences and case studies, this book also gives us, as 21st Century readers, a glimpse into the rapid changes in general practice and the NHS in general. Whether you’re in general practice, or you’re a medical professional, or you have a penchant for all kinds of autobiographies/memoirs, you will find this a thought-provoking and captivating book that’s impossible to put down. Take a peek at the ‘Look Inside’ feature now and be prepared to be instantly intrigued.

    There are treatments available that can halt, and in some cases, even reverse the aging process.But how do you know what treatments are best for you? Which of the hippest, hottest, and newest are fabulously effective and which are nothing more than new-age snake oil? Let us be your guides. Dr. and Mrs. Guinea Pig Present The Only Guide You'll Ever Need to the Best Anti-Aging Treatments will outline all the best techniques and treatments, from the so-new-you-haven t-heard-of-them-yet to the tried-and-true; from the perfectly legal to the are-you-trying-to-get-me-arrested; from the simple to the outrageous; and from the cheapest drugstore creams to the most complicated surgeries. We will provide you with the information and research you need to create your own, unique anti-aging plan to look and feel your best forever!"

    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

    Laughing and jokes have been proven to have positive mental and physical effects on the body! KINDLE UNLIMITED & AMAZON PRIME can read this book for FREE! This books is especially great for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home. 100+ knock knock funny jokes Excellent for early and beginner readers Hours of fun and entertainment for kids and children Great for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloud Funny and hilarious knock knock jokes for children of all ages, teens, and adults BONUS INCLUDED --> FREE Joke Book Download 101 Funny Jokes (see link inside) Download a free joke book with purchase of this book! From this Funny Joke Book... Knock knock!Who’s there?Bless!Bless who?I didn’t sneeze! LOL! Knock knock!Who’s there?Auntie!Auntie who?Auntie glad to see me again! HAHA! Knock knock!Who’s there?Zeke!Zeke who?Zeke and ye shall find! LOL! Knock knock!Who’s there?Arnie!Arnie who!Arnie having fun? HAHA! Knock knock!Who’s there?Carl!Carl who?Carl get you there faster than walking will! Best-Selling Author ~ Johnny B. Laughing The Joke King is back with another hilarious joke book full of funny, laugh-out-loud, crazy comedy and MASSIVE assortment of knock knock jokes for children of all ages, teens, and adults. This awesome joke book for kids is easy to read and full of laughs!WARNING: This funny joke book will cause you to laugh hysterically! Scroll up and click 'buy' to start laughing today! 100% Money Back Guarantee Tags: funny knock knock jokes for kids, funny joke, funny jokes, lol, jokes, food, joke book, knock knock book, ebook, books, funny, knock knock jokes, ebooks, funny jokes, kids, haha, hilarious, children, joke, kid, funny jokes for children, kids books, childrens books, childrens book, kids book, kids books, funny knock knock jokes, joke book, food book, joke books, hilarious, lol, laughing, laughter, knock knock, funny jokes, funny joke book, book for kids, kindle book, kindle ebook, joke, jokes, jokes for kids, jokes for children, knock knock jokes, knock knock jokes for kids, funny jokes, jokes online, comedy, humor, early reader, beginning reader, laugh, laughter, funniest jokes, ages5-12, ages 6-8, ages 9-12, comedy, humor, preteen, young adult laughing, kids comedy

    is an American Board of Emergency Medicine certified ED doctor. His journey began in the mid-1970s, when he chose to pursue a career in medicine. In his youthful perspective, he came to regard doctors as the good guys, the ones who healed people and saved lives. He knew he’d be one of those good guys one day. Now, with a career spanning more than thirty years, he works as an emergency-room physician in North Carolina. In A License to Heal: Random Memories of an ER Doctor, Bentley describes the real world of emergency medicine from the viewpoint of a practicing physician. This memoir is filled with real-life stories of the ER, including life and death, triumph and tragedy. Meet a man named Solomon Darby, who spoke to long-dead relatives during his own near-death experience. Bentley also recalls the heartbreaking story of a young widow who desperately needed to understand and cope with the death of her husband. Amid the grief, there are also episodes of great humor and human comedy. In the dynamic world of emergency medicine, there is a great deal of pain, blood, and tragedy, but there is also hope, compassion, and excitement—for both the patients and the staff."

    Over the past few years, we ve seen facial hair sprouting up on faces everywhere. Men want to experiment with their facial gardens, but it s not always just as easy as putting the razor to rest Any man will surely go back to shaving when his beard starts to itch. When a goatee or mustache looks bad, he ll shave it off, discouraged and unaware of his options. Marginalized facial hair stereotypes prevent every day, normal guys from making facial hair part of their personal style. Men have forgotten about their beards, let alone how to wear and care for them. Until now. The Facial Hair Handbook is a hilarious and informative guide to all aspects of facial hair, for men of all ages and all faces. From making the decision to wear facial hair, to the best way to take it off, all men can finally be stylish and care for their appearance while staying true to who they are: Men.

    From realizing she should have paid more attention when the hula hoops were passed out in gym class, to near death by spray tanning, to realizing her daughters have given her more gifts than she could ever give them in return, A Second Helping is sure to make you laugh out loud and realize that being a parent is hilarious-- when it's happening to someone else.

    The author doesn't pull any punches describing the good, the bad, the funny and the just plain ridiculous of the Submarine Service. Besides a wealth of information about what it's like to serve on a submarine, you'll meet real life characters like Tongue, Snake and Button Butt John. Did submarines make them rude, crude, and crazy. Or does the Submarine Service act as a magnet for every nut in the Navy? One thing is sure, after two months underwater, and with their back pay in their back pocket, Sub Sailors are as wild as cowboys after a cattle drive. Bar the doors and hide your daughters. Every reader owes it to themselves to use Amazons "Look In" feature to take a peek inside this unique and entertaining book.

    At the time of my arrest, I was a thirty-seven year old Harvard graduate with medical and post-doctoral degrees. I attended one of the finest residency and fellowship training programs in the world at the University of California, San Francisco. I played two sports in college, earned awards at every level of education and training, had wonderful friends and a beautiful three-year-old daughter. Having grown up the son of a restaurant manager and a housewife, I had transcended the humble beginnings of a small Midwestern town to become the quintessential American Dream.Or so I thought. But with my arrest on felony importation charges, everything I had worked so hard for was swept away and the entire trajectory of my life was indelibly altered. I would embark on a three year battle not only for my medical license, but also for my freedom. This journey would lead to intense personal introspection, and in that process, I would discover with ugliness, there was also beauty, and with punishment, mercy.There are many reasons I have written this manuscript, with one of the most important being that I hoped my story would resonate with others who have gone through difficult circumstances as a consequence of a dark side of their personality. With this book, I hope to inspire others to accept and embrace the good and bad, while continually striving for improved self-understanding and acceptance.I have changed names primarily for legal purposes, but the facts are unchanged. Although the events described in the book occurred more than ten years ago, I think about them nearly every day. The shame and humiliation are ever-present. Any simple Google search of my name reveals the truth, and that truth has affected me over and over, despite the years, as it probably should. As the judge told me that day in a federal courtroom, "You have betrayed the public's trust." This is my confessional.

    Patricia and her husband Patrick are spending the summer in their holiday home in the Languedoc village of Morbignan la Crèbe. One hot Friday afternoon Patrick walks in with the little dog, thinking she is a stray. They have no intention of keeping her. ‘Just for tonight,’ says Patrick. ‘We will take her to the animal shelter tomorrow.’ It never happens. They spend the weekend getting to know and love the little creature, who looks at them appealingly with big brown eyes, and wags her absurd stump of a tail every time they speak to her. On the Monday her owner turns up, alerted by the Mairie. They could have handed her over. Instead Patricia finds herself saying: ‘We like your dog, Monsieur. May we keep her?’ It is the start of what will be four years as Morbignanglais, as they settle into life as permanent residents of the village. “At Home in the Pays d’Oc” is about their lives in Morbignan, the neighbours who soon become friends, the parties and the vendanges and the battles with French bureaucracy. It is the story of some of their bizarre and sometimes hilarious encounters: the Velcro bird, the builder in carpet slippers, the neighbour who cuts the phone wires, the clock that clacks, the elusive carpenter who really did have to go to a funeral.