With then help of 73-year-old Grandma Mazur, ex-hooker Lula, a transvestite musician named Sally Sweet, and the all-too-hospitable, all-too-sexy Joe Morelli, Stephanie might just catch her woman. Then again, with more mishaps than there are exits on the Jersey Turnpike--including murders, firebombs, and Stephanie's arch-rival bounty hunter chasing after the same fugitive--Stephanie better watch her back big-time if she wants to live to crack this case. High Five: Bounty hunter Stephanie Plum sets out to find her missing uncle-- and along the way smacks slam-bang into: a dead body, a nasty bookie, her stun-gun-toting grandmother, two very sexy men, an angry little man who won't leave her apartment, and a Mafia wedding. Jersey's favorite bounty hunter has never been better! With high hair, street smarts and plenty of attitude, Steph's sure to nail this case-- or risk life and spandex-clad limb trying... Hot Six:Bounty hunter Stephanie Plum and Trenton vice cop Joe Morelli join forces to find the madman killer who shot and barbecued the youngest son of international black-market arms dealer Alexander Ramos. Carlos Manoso, street name Ranger, is caught on video just minutes before the crime occurs. He's the number-one suspect. Ranger is Stephanie's mentor--the man who taught her everything she knows about fugitive apprehension. And he's more than her friend

    

    Now with super-cool foil covers! Shiny! Fun!Oh, no! It's not enough that George and Harold have invented Captain Underpants, the greatest superhero of all time, and that they've also saved the world FIVE times! They defeated Dr. Diaper! They punished Professor Poopypants! And they whacked the wicked Wedgie Woman! What task could be worse?!!? This one: As punishment, the boys have to write a 100-page report on "good citizenship," and they have been specifically ordered NOT to write another comic about Captain Underpants. So what do they do? Aha! Meet Super Diaper Baby--the most powerful peewee to pack a punch. With Pilkey's typical over-the-edge humor, Super Diaper Baby will have kids laughing until soda comes out their noses.

    But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years—except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in the divinely hilarious yet heartfelt work "reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams" (Philadelphia Inquirer).Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more—except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdala—and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.

    Get Fuzzy has become a hit cartoon with its bitingly funny portrait of single life with pets.And why not? The laughs come fast and furious. Get Fuzzy features Rob Wilco, a single, mild-mannered advertising executive who's the so-called guardian of Bucky and Satchel, anthropomorphic scamps that still live by their animal instincts. Bucky, a temperamental cat who carries a boom box and goes on spending sprees, definitely calls the shots in this eclectic household, while Satchel is a kindly canine with a sensitive soul who tries to remain neutral, even though he bears the brunt of his feline companion's mischief.Between the three of them, the Wilco household faces a whole host of trials and tribulations that classify them as family. Satchel wants his boundaries respected. Bucky refuses to eat vegetables but insists on snarfing up Rob's plants. Rob tries to meet women, but his pets continually subvert his efforts. In every frame, Get Fuzzy depicts the hilarious war between the species, giving the animals an equal footing in hilarious one-upmanship.Get Fuzzy is the comic strip for everyone who loves their pets with an attitude. That said, Groovitude is Get Fuzzy at its finest.Contains cartoons from The Dog Is Not a Toy and Fuzzy Logic.

    Larry Gonick's celebrated series The Cartoon History of the Universe is a unique fusion of world history and the comics medium, a work of serious scholarship and a masterpiece of popular literature. Praised by historians as a narrative and interpretive tour de force, Gonick's clever illustrations deliver important information with a deceptively light tone, teaching us about the people and events that have shaped our world. This long-awaited new volume covers the Middle Ages around the globe, including the origin and spread of Islam; West Africa and the cross-Saharan trade; Central Asia and the Byzantine Empire; the European Dark Ages and the Crusades; the Mongol conquests; the Black Death; the Ottoman Empire; the Italian Renaissance; and the rise of Spain, leading up to Columbus's departure for the New World. Highlighting key events and retrieving oft-neglected historical connections, Gonick offers an historical survey that is at once multicultural, humanistic, skeptical, and laugh-out-loud funny.

    In reality, Brotweiler is more like camp than prison, but still, Ike's not cut out for life without Mrs. LaRue. Finally, he runs away only to find himself back in Snort City -- just in time to save Mrs. LaRue's life.A classic picture book written and illustrated by How Do Dinosaurs...? artist Mark Teague.

    At the core of much of the strip's wild humor is 10-year-old Jason. He tortures his parents and two teenage siblings Peter and Paige out of their minds with his computer and his pet iguana, Quincy. In this treasury, parents Roger and Andrea again have their hands full. In one strip, Jason boldly bursts into their bedroom in the middle of the night to announce that it's "2 A.M. and the lights still work." In another, Jason surprises his mom with a new beep for her computer known simply as "Defcon One." Jason also holds his own with his older siblings, spelling "My Sister Is Ugly" with the carved faces of 14 pumpkins. FoxTrot continues to demonstrate its timelessness with its always fresh, irreverent, and zany brand of family humor. FoxTrot: Assembled with Care captures the humorous side of the trials and tribulations that come with daily family life like no other strip today.Universal Press Syndicate newspaper feature:*FoxTrotAuthor's web site: www.foxtrot.com/

    Each volume in this series reprints two full years of Sunday strips, or 104 full-page, black-and-white Sunday strips (Herriman did not incorporate color into the strip until 1935). Krazy Kat is a love story, focusing on the relationship of its three main characters. Krazy Kat adored Ignatz Mouse. Ignatz Mouse hated Krazy Kat, the expression of which was in throwing bricks at Krazy's head. Offisa Pup loved Krazy and sought to protect "her" (Herriman always maintained that Krazy was genderless), mostly by throwing Ignatz in jail. Each of the characters was ignorant of the other's true motivations. This simple structure allowed Herriman to build entire worlds of meaning into the actions, building thematic depth that led critics like Gilbert Seldes and E. E. Cummings to recognize Herriman's genius almost immediately. Each of Fantagraphics' Krazy Ignatz volumes is designed by Chris Ware, creator of the wildly successful ACME Novelty Library series. This beautiful volume includes material never collected before.

    A first collection of the website cartoonist's observations on the war on terrorism and other contemporary issues critiques such subjects as the anthrax mailings, Enron, the Office for Homeland Security, and the Palestinian-Israeli conflict.

    In Little Myth Marker, Skeeve bluffs his way into a high-stakes poker game, but when he wins, he's saddled with Markie, a pint-sized IOU with a talent for trouble.

    The humorous style and witty wordplay that has enthralled readers over the last two decades makes these titles a perfect addition to your eBook library. For a limited time only, take advantage of this exciting opportunity: buy The Source of Magic and get A Spell for Chameleon for free!A Spell for ChameleonXanth was the enchanted land where magic ruled--where every citizen had a special spell only he could cast. That is, except for Bink of North Village. He was sure he possessed no magic, and knew that if he didn't find some soon, he would be exiled. According to the Good Magician Humpfrey, the charts said that Bink was as powerful as the King or even the Evil Magician Trent. Unfortunately, no one could determine its form. Meanwhile, Bink was in despair. If he didn't find his magic soon, he would be forced to leave....The Source of MagicOrdered by King Trent to determine the source of Xanth's magic, Bink and his companions were harried by an unseen enemy determined to thwart them. When even their protector turned against them, Blink still managed to reach his goal and carry out the King's orders...but the king did not expect Blink's next act--to destroy utterly the magic of Xanth!Castle RoognaMillie, a ghost for 800 years, wants only one man--Jonathan, and he's a zombie. To prove himself, Magician Dor volunteers to get the potion that can restore Jonathan to full life. But he has to go back through time to do it, to a peril-haunted, ancient Xanth, where danger lurks at every turn....Centaur AisleDor agreed to act as King of Xanth while Trent was gone for a week. But the weeks passed and Trent did not return. Dor knew he had to rescue his king but with no magic powers, how could it be done...?

    . . every last damn word that appeared between October 2000 and October 2001.The Onion Ad Nauseam: Complete News Archives features loads of material no longer available online or anywhere else. Look for a new volume every year.

    Of course, every once in a while, we got on one another's nerves. Poseidon was always trying to organize swimming meets. Hestia was always tidying up the place. Hera was the bossy one, always telling the rest of us what to do. But Demeter was definitely the weirdest. She was always going on and on about wanting to plant a little vegetable garden.But, hey, we were family.We all grew up in Dad's belly together.When Hades and his siblings were born, their father, Cronus, Ruler of the Universe, swallowed them whole -- just because of a prophecy that said one of his children would be mightier than he was. Can Hades and his brothers and sisters overthrow their big, bad dad and take over the universe? It's sure to be a hot time, Hades!

    It tells the story of a discussion between Death and a philosopher, in which the philosopher attempts to use the many-worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics to argue death is not a certainty.

    But Saturday Night Live, launched in 1975 and still thriving today, would change the face of television. It introduced brash new stars with names like Belushi, Radner, Chase, and Murray; trashed taboos that had inhibited TV for decades; and had such an impact on American life, laughter, and politics that even presidents of the United States had to take notice. Now, Pulitzer Prize-winner Tom Shales and bestselling author James Andrew Miller bring together stars, writers, guest hosts, contributors, and craftsmen for the first-ever oral history of Saturday Night Live, from 1974, when it was just an idea, through 2002, when it has long since become an institution. In their own words, dozens of personalities recall the backstage stories, behind-the-scenes gossip, feuds, foibles, drugs, sex, struggles, and calamities, including personal details never before revealed. Shales and Miller have interviewed a galaxy of stars, including Mike Myers, Chris Rock, Bill Murray, Tom Hanks, Adam Sandler, Chevy Chase, Will Ferrell, Dan Aykroyd, Steve Martin, Jon Lovitz, Jane Curtin, Billy Crystal, Martin Short, Dana Carvey, Tina Fey, Jimmy Fallon, Chris Kattan, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Garrett Morris, Molly Shannon, Damon Wayans, Chris Elliott, Julia Sweeney, Norm Macdonald, and Paul Simon-plus writers like Al Franken, Conan O'Brien, Larry David, Rosie Shuster, Jack Handey, Robert Smigel, Don Novello, and others who got their big breaks as part of the SNL team. The Coneheads, the Blues Brothers, Buck-wheat, Wayne and Garth, Hans and Franz, the Cheerleaders, Todd DiLaMuca and Lisa Loopner, "Cheeseburger cheeseburger," Mango, the Church Lady, Ed Grimley-they're all here. And for every fabulous character on-screen there was an outrageous maverick, misfit, or rebel behind the scenes. Live from New York does what no other book about the show has ever done: It lets the people who were there tell the story in their own words, blunt and loving and uncensored.

    From obscure history to classic wordplay to dumb crooks to inspiring quotations, you never know what you’re going to read next! Since 1987, the Bathroom Readers’ Institute has led the movement to stand up for those who sit down and read in the bathroom (and everywhere else for that matter). With more than 11 million books in print, the Uncle John’s Bathroom Reader series is the longest-running, most popular series of its kind in the world.Where else could you learn how the banana peel changed history, how to predict the future by rolling the dice, how the Jivaro tribes shrunk heads, and the science behind love at first sight? Uncle John rules the world of information and humor, so get ready to be thoroughly entertained. Read all about…Homer the Greek versus Homer the SimpsonThe history of the bicycleWhen humans become hailstonesAlternate definitions for common wordsHelen Keller’s wisdomThe Silly Putty sagaAnd much more!

    "Piled Higher and Deeper" the comic strip is currently read by grad students from over 300 universities and from around the world.

    This one-of-a-kind encounter with the absurdities, complexities, and nuances of race relations is brought to you by five writers of color whose groundbreaking independent magazine, ego trip, has been called "the world's rawest, stinkiest, funniest magazine" by Spin.Filled with enough testifying and truth to satisfy even the good Reverend Sharpton, ego trip's Big Book of Racism is a riotous and revolutionary look at race and popular culture that's sure to spark controversy and ignite debate.

    This hardcover edition in the Uncle John's Bathroom Reader series will bowl readers over. This biggest ever volume has combined two previous Bathroom Readers in their entirety, Uncle John's Great Big Bathroom Reader and Uncle John's Ultimate Bathroom Reader. It has more entertainment, humor, trivia, science, history, and pop culture than ever before. Among lots of other topics, readers will learn about why the White House is white; strange medical conditions; the history of the bra; the origin of the Miss America pageant; weird tales of the Ouija board; the hair museum; why Thanksgiving is in November; why popcorn pops; and the origin of Pop-Tarts "RM" . It's all there in Uncle John's Biggest Ever Bathroom Reader.

    Are you ready to soak up some jokes? Dive into SpongeBob JokePants and join the nautical nonsense!What does SpongeBob sleep in?"His undersquare."How did Squidward do in the hundred-yard dash?"He won by a nose."What has two big claws and is very messy?"A slobster?"

    Skeeve must deal with myth guided desires, fairy godfathers, and an offer he can't refuse in two of Robert Asprin's most delightful myth adventures.

    In M.Y.T.H. Inc. Link, former magician's apprentice Skeeve tumbles up the corporate ladder, but that doesn't keep him from sleuthing around some dangerous dimensions. And in Myth-Nomers and Im-Pervections, Skeeve's demon cohort, Ahaz, leaves in a huff, and Skeeve finds him in the worst neighborhood in the galaxy.

    Thats the tragedy. So the Brentmeister General is now prepared to share with us the scenes of his daily life. The scenarios that really illustrate the principles of great team management. His morale-boosting comedy (remember when he got Dawn to actually believe she was sacked?), his fund of earthy wisdom (there should be no ego when youre pulling together to do something good) along with glimpses of the fervent soul beyond the work-related arena, the impassioned singer-songwriter of the potentially highly successful band Foregone Conclusion (a.k.a. supported by Texas). These scripts will show how anyone can be a great boss and a funny person, how to use humour to boost morale, how to have a laugh at work, with women, at us. Investment in people. Thats what its all about really. The staff. Letting them know that they are our most important commodity. Its like, if youre cleaning a floor, and youre up against it, then come to me, and Ill help us clean our floor togethernot literally. Including 500 screengrabs from the series and unseen email correspondence between David Brent and his BBC Producer, The Office: The Scripts is the definitive comedy script book, providing fans with an invaluable opportunity to relive their favourite moments over and over again.

    Stuck in an East Texas old folks home, they must face off against a redneck mummy.Skyhorse Publishing, under our Night Shade and Talos imprints, is proud to publish a broad range of titles for readers interested in science fiction (space opera, time travel, hard SF, alien invasion, near-future dystopia), fantasy (grimdark, sword and sorcery, contemporary urban fantasy, steampunk, alternative history), and horror (zombies, vampires, and the occult and supernatural), and much more. While not every title we publish becomes a New York Times bestseller, a national bestseller, or a Hugo or Nebula award-winner, we are committed to publishing quality books from a diverse group of authors.

    Big deal. You should try the lunches they serve out of Newark. Compared with the chicken napalm I ate on my last flight, the men in Con Air are about as dangerous as balloons.”Anthony Lane on The Bridges of Madison County—“I got my copy at the airport, behind a guy who was buying Playboy’s Book of Lingerie, and I think he had the better deal. He certainly looked happy with his purchase, whereas I had to ask for a paper bag.” Anthony Lane on Martha Stewart—“Super-skilled, free of fear, the last word in human efficiency, Martha Stewart is the woman who convinced a million Americans that they have the time, the means, the right, and—damn it—the duty to pipe a little squirt of soft cheese into the middle of a snow pea, and to continue piping until there are ‘fifty to sixty’ stuffed peas raring to go.”For ten years, Anthony Lane has delighted New Yorker readers with his film reviews, book reviews, and profiles that range from Buster Keaton to Vladimir Nabokov to Ernest Shackleton. Nobody’s Perfect is an unforgettable collection of Lane’s trademark wit, satire, and insight that will satisfy both the long addicted and the not so familiar.

    It explains all this and much more. It discloses the best time to have a sex change, how to have a virgin birth, when to seduce your sisters or eat your lover. Quirky and brilliant, it takes as its starting point all creatures great and small worried about their bizarre sex lives, and the letters they write to the wise Dr Tatiana, the only agony aunt in all creation with a prodigious knowledge of both natural history and evolutionary biology.

    McManus's newest collection ponders the strange allure of the RV, the existential implications of being lost, the baffling tendency of animals to outsmart those who wish to hunt them, and the singular pleasure of doubling the size of every fish one doesn't actually catch.Combining the curmudgeonly voice of Dave Barry and the innocent tone of Garrison Keillor, McManus brilliantly captures the everyday absurdities that comprise our existence. Alongside his humor, McManus's inimitable vision consistently evokes a childlike wonder at the natural world. Even if we are running low on food, the compass is broken, and we are fairly certain we have just spotted a family of Sasquatches frolicking in the treetops, The Bear in the Attic makes the outdoors seem wildly irresistible.

    The Trail stretches along the East Coast of the United States, from Georgia to Maine, through some of the most arresting and celebrated landscapes in America - the Smoky Mountains, Shenandoah National Park, the Berkshire Hills of Massachusetts and the Great North Woods of Maine.

    The novel has been filmed with Pauline Collins as Mrs Caldicot and John Alderton as the nursing home owner. This is the first Mrs Caldicot novel. (The second, which continues the story, is Mrs Caldicot's Knickerbocker Glory.) Both book and film have been widely praised. The Times described it as `Funny and poignant'. The Daily Express called it a `fairytale comedy'. The Daily Telegraph called it `Funny and poignant and socially relevant'. Cinema audiences stood and cheered at the end when the film was shown. The first of the books and films to see life through the eyes of the older citizen. `Mrs Caldicot's Cabbage War made me laugh out loud. Dr Coleman's lightness of touch and direct prose are all that one could wish for.' - Maxwell Craven in the Derby Evening Telegraph `Vernon Coleman really captures the personality of Mrs Caldicot. You'll be hooked and won't be able to put it down.' - Newton Abbott & Mid Devon `Understated British classic.' - Express and Echo `Funny and thought provoking novel.' - Western Morning News 'Funny and poignant...about a woman who decides to fight back, transforming the lives of those around her.' - The Times '...typically understated British classic.' - Express & Echo 'Humour, pathos and sympathy.' -Evening standard 'Witty, poignant and beautifully written' - Western Mail '...a little British comedy with a big heart.' Financial Times The author, Vernon Coleman, is a qualified doctor who has written over 100 books - many of which have appeared on bestseller lists. His books have sold over two million hardback and paperback copies in the UK and been translated into 24 languages. There is a list of his other novels on his Amazon author site. Bestselling non-fiction books include Bodypower. He is also the author of How to Stop Your Doctor Killing You. What the papers say about Vernon Coleman: Coleman is a very funny writer - This England Vernon Coleman writes brilliant books - The Good Book Guide No thinking person can ignore him - The Ecologist A godsend - Daily Telegraph Superstar - Independent on Sunday Compulsive reading - The Guardian His message is important - The Economist His advice is optimistic and enthusiastic - British Medical Journal The man is a national treasure - What doctors don't tell you Its impossible not to be impressed - Western Daily Press Outspoken and alert - Sunday Express Marvellously succinct, refreshingly sensible - The Spectator Probably one of the most brilliant men alive today - Irish Times King of the media docs - The Independent Britain's leading medical author - The Star Britain's leading health care campaigner - The Sun The patients' champion - Birmingham Post The doctor who dares to speak his mind - Oxford Mail He writes lucidly and wittily - Good Housekeeping etc etc

    Show began developing a cult-like following, which has only grown since the series end. This lavishly-illustrated book features original, never-before-seen material--plus a complete episode guide--making it a rich, unique retrospective.

    Here are 13 reasons to read this book:Triskaidekaphobia, the fear of ten plus threeMilitary surplus: The story of carrot cakeThe real-life inspiration behind DraculaGoing Ape: The history of TarzanPeople who married themselvesPolitically incorrect toothpasteLegendary business blundersHollywood’s biggest bombsWide world of weird sportsDog food for thoughtThe birth of the CDDumb criminalsZappa’s LawAnd much, much more!

    These free-verse poems, which first appeared in Marquis's New York newspaper columns, revolve around the escapades of Archy, the philosophical cockroach who was once a poet, and Mehitabel, a streetwise alley cat who was once Cleopatra. Reincarnated as the lowest creatures on the social scale, they prowl the rowdy streets of New York City in between the world wars. The antics of these two immortal characters are now made available for the first time in their original order of publication in this unique, comprehensive collection, which features many poems never before reprinted.First time in Penguin ClassicsArchy and Mehitabel is considered the inspiration for E.B. White's Charlotte's WebFeatures many new poems never reprinted since they were first published early in the twentieth centuryIntroduction places Marquis in the context of American humor and the history of satire

    I know, I know, it's a big planet with a lot of wonderful things, but golden retrievers are the absolute best. Mine is named Tara . . . The only problem she has ever caused is that I spend so much time with her in the mornings that I am almost invariably late for work." Whether dueling with new forensics or the local old boys' network, irreverent defense attorney Andy Carpenter always leaves them awed with his biting wit and winning fourth-quarter game plan. But Andy prefers the company of his best friend, Tara, to the people he encounters in the courtroom. Tara, a golden retriever, is clearly smarter than half the lawyers who clog the courts of Passaic County. However, just as it seems Andy has everything figured out, his dad, New Jersey's legendary ex-D.A., drops dead in front of him at a game in Yankee Stadium. The shocks pile on as he discovers his dad left him with two unexpected legacies: a fortune of $22 million that Andy never knew existed . . . and a murder case with enough racial tinder to burn down City Hall. Struggling to serve justice and bring honor to his father, Andy must dig up some explosive political skeletons - and an astonishing family secret that can close his case (and his mouth) for good.

    Laugh your knickers off with the hilarious #1 national bestselling confessions of Georgia Nicolson!Includes paperback copies of:Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal SnoggingOn the Bright Side, I'm Now the Girlfriend of a Sex GodKnocked Out By My Nunga-Nungas

    His unique gifts and the way he led the transformation of British comedy (from music hall to perverse absurdity) and his clear comic influence on Monty Python's Flying Circus and every show since, has been much written about. But never before has there been a collection of Cook's own writings. "Tragically, I Was an Only Twin" gathers the treasures of Cook's comic career, from school and university via Beyond the Fringe alongside Alan Bennett, Jonathan Miller, and Dudley Moore, to his sureal, satirical journalism for" Private Eye." It includes his monologues, the cream of his irreverent essays, and highlights from his much celebrated partnerships with Dudley Moore as Pete & Dud and Derek & Clive. Illustrated with his own drawings, this is the first, the only, and certainly the definitive collection of the transformative genius of comedy that was Peter Cook.

    These "daily afflictions" offer readers inspiration, practical advice, and food for thought, as they navigate the jungle of existential terror that begins anew each day. We follow the fictional Brother Void on a spiritual journey, both profound and hilarious, into self, family, love, career, death—and, ultimately, Enlightenment. We learn to "listen to our inner critic," appreciate "the nurturing power of dysfunctional families," "love the wrong person," "succeed at failure," "embrace our inner corpse," and, finally, withstand the "agony of being connected to everything in the Universe." Part spiritual autobiography, part ironic meditation, this tragicomic guide to life's sublime predicaments will elevate and educate the spirit. The truth will set you free, Brother Void reminds us, but first it will hurt like hell.

    Love and war go hand in hand when Skeeve "the Great" asks two bumbling bodyguards to join the army of Possiltum-and then finds himself overrun by nubile suitors.

    Join Mike Nelson on an angst-filled visit to a health spa; shopping sessions at Home Depot and Radio Shack; adventures in the very amateur musical theater; a gut-busting discourse on the history of television; ruminations on his roles as husband, father, and citizen; and much, much more.

    Jim Davis’s grandfather, James A. Garfield Davis, was a big, cantankerous, outspoken man. Garfield is a big, cantankerous, outspoken cat. Coincidence? Of course not. The cartoon affectionately modeled on his grandfather has propelled creator Jim Davis–and Garfield–into the realm of comic superstardom. In this book, you’ll get a unique look back at the humble beginnings and enormous success of America’s favorite feline.In Dog Years I’d Be Dead takes a comprehensive look at everything Garfield– the comics, the television shows, the zillions of products (who on the planet hasn’t seen the grinning plush doll suction-cupped to a car window?), and, of course, the fans. You’ll get the inside scoop about the pioneering comic-strip books that set the standard for the industry with a shape now called the “Garfield format.” You’ll venture into the studio where the voice talent recorded TV shows, and hear about the antics of special guest stars like Jonathan Winters and Buddy Hackett. Loaded with never-before-seen archival gems from Jim Davis’s personal collection and tribute cartoons from legends like Beetle Bailey’s Mort Walker, Blondie’s Dean Young, and The Family Circus’s Bill Keane, this is a book to treasure.

    A few standouts from these 460 pages:The first computer programmersWeird medical conditionsBrits Vs. Americans: a word quizStrange tourist attractionsThe origin of the White HouseThe world’s second-dumbest outlawThe Tonight Show storyThe forgotten hero of flagpole sitting Why popcorn popsAnd much, much more!

    Who hasn't searched for the right word to describe a colleague's maschalephidrosis (runaway armpit perspiration) or a boss's pleonexia (insane greed)? And what better way is there to insult the scombroid landlord (resembling a mackerel) or that tumbrel of a brother-in-law (a person who is drunk to the point of vomiting) than by calling him by his rightful name? A compact compendium of ingenious words for anyone who's been tongue-tied, flabbergasted, or dumbfounded, Depraved and Insulting English supplies the appropriate vocabulary for any occasion. Word lovers, chronic insulters, berayers, bescumbers, and bespewers need fear no more—finding the correct word to wow your friends or silence your enemies just got a whole lot easier.

    Sing carols with Charlie Brown and company around Schroeder’s piano. See Snoopy’s festively decorated doghouse. Find out if Lucy’s been naughty or nice. Discover if snow has any effect on Pig Pen’s “aura.” And learn about the true meaning of Christmas with Linus.Just in time for the holiday season, A Peanuts Christmas is the complete collection of Christmas strips from 1950 to 1999. For the first time ever this delightful book brings together nearly fifty years of comfort and joy with Charlie Brown, Snoopy, and the rest of the gang.

    Those seminal books in feline aesthetics are now offered in new pocket-size editions filled with the best from each volume, making purrfect gifts for cat lovers and art lovers alike.Reviews"A collection of the world'¬?s most fabulously decorated felines."-National Examiner

    Koalas look cuddly, but they're actually irritable, solitary beasts who do not want belly rubs. What kind of mocking god created creatures with poofy ears and big black noses that don't want belly rubs? BOpossums: North America gets one lousy marsupial, and let's just say it's not going to win any beauty contests. Or even not-ugly contests. C−Wombats: "Wombat" is a great name. It's got a "wom" and a "bat," and an "omba." They're kind of nondescript animals, cute in a generic pudgy mammal way, but their name spelled backward is "tabmow," and that makes all the difference. AThe Book of Ratings is hysterically arbitrary and undeniably infectious.

    Each essay focuses on how the strip presents an aspect of writing life - getting started, getting rejected, searching for new ideas - that they have experienced.

    From Jim Davis's Garfield to Patrick McDonnell's Mooch, cartoon cats make us laugh. Now in the form of Solange the Siamese, Brooke McEldowney has successfully captured the endearing qualities that makea cat, well, a cat: the way they cannot resist dark fabric, their unflinching indifference to squalid humanity (unless, of course, said humanity comes bearing treats), and their advanced heat-seeking technology that leads them to the warmest laps and the coziest corners. Readers will grin with recognition at each of these humorously illustrated hallmarks. The result is a delightful field guide to a cat's moods, motivations, and behaviors. Ever since it appeared as a recurring theme in the comic strip 9 Chickweed Lane, Hallmarks Of Felinity has attracted a large and devoted readership of its own. Longtime fans and newcomers alike will enjoy this charming gift book.

    Also it rhymes. This lovely volume is a terrific gifty object (hey, have you ever tried to write book jacket copy?) as varied and delightful as a fine box of chocolates, yet with the decided advantage that there aren¹t any of those icky little pineapple jelly things.

    Now with DOG FOOD, the duo turns its talents to the canine realm, wittily reworking familiar doggy phrases for a whole new level of humor and meaning. These pepper pooches and mango mutts are guaranteed to charm dog owners, dog lovers, and even -- dare we say it -- cat fans. Chow down!

    A hilarious reconfiguration of important paintings, comedian Ursus Wehrli deconstructs the works of famous artists and reconstructs them to fit his more orderly view of the world.

    Boogers. Stinky boys. These are the things of childhood, and they're all here in this outrageous collection of poems that look at the world through a child's eyes. Featuring everything from the Giant Children of the title-who flip pages with amazing speed-to a turtle named Jaws, the poetry included here is rambunctious, irreverent, funny, and sometimes even gross. Tedd Arnold, creator of the beloved Parts and More Parts, and Brod Bagert are good friends who have happily teamed up-with hilarious results.

    From a 16-page newspaper about punk bands and violence to stores, a clothing line, VICE Films, VICE TV, VICE Records, viceland.com, etc., VICE has become much more than a way for three guys to get laid. It's become a lifestyle, a degrading and disgusting lifestyle of sex and drugs and rock and roll and death. This book is a collection of the irreverent, hilarious and downright scary gonzo journalism that brought three losers from the crack houses of Le Plateau to the deluxe apartments of Manhattan.

    If you want the inside scoop, the real deal, the lowdown on each sun sign, then look no further. It's time to forget those traditional astrology books where Sagittarians are gregarious, Capricorns are ambitious, and Pisceans are dreamers. Instead, enter a world where Archers are loud-mouthed bores, Goats are pompous social climbers, and Fish are chronically helpless. Dixon-Cooper debunks the myths, reveals the flaws, and examines the dubious virtues of each sun sign. Discover how to use your own inner brat to outwit bullies, outmaneuver manipulators, and win those endless games that lovers play. Learn how to deal with those dysfunctional people you encounter every day, including how to:contain a Ram's oversized egocalm a raging Bullkeep a fickle Twin faithfulIrreverent, biting, and laugh-out-loud funny, Born on a Rotten Day exaggerates the bad, exorcises the good, and puts a new spin on the age-old question -- what's your sign?

    Now, here surfaces Greetings From Sherman's Lagoon, the answer to the long-time pleas of loyal followers of Sherman the shark and his sea urchin pals. Those who regularly read the silly yet sophisticated strip will enjoy seeing how its art, humor, and characters have evolved. Cartoonist Jim Toomey has mastered the look and personality of the creatures that his readers have come to love: Sherman and his significant-shark-other Megan, Fillmore the turtle, Hawthorne the cranky hermit crab, and other coral critters. Just as early Snoopy drawings more closely resembled a beagle, says Toomey, the characters more closely resemble fish. Toomey adds that his early strips adhered less to story lines and were more focused on delivering a gag-a-day. Longtime fans and newer readers alike are sure to enjoy noting similarities and differences for themselves in this hilarious turn-back-the-clock collection.

    High-Spirited Rose is Rose is the fifth collection featuring the high-spirited high jinks of the Gumbo family-Rose, her husband, Jimbo, and her cherished son, Pasquale. We can count on the imaginative Rose, who lightens her household load by occasionally assuming an alter ego, Vicki, a black-leather-clad biker babe. This collection features original artwork sure to please fans. More than any strip today, Rose is Rose challenges its readers to relive their childhood feelings of wonder and awe. Brady began his beloved Rose is Rose strip in 1984.

    In dazzling language and startling images, Touré invents a place called Soul City, America’s most miraculous metropolis. In an astonishing array of voices and styles, The Portable Promised Land celebrates the most soulful corners of America while questioning the very nature of Blackness.Among Touré’s unforgettable characters are the Right Revren Daddy Love, Brooklyn’s favorite sexually wayward preacher (“A Hot Time at the Church of Kentucky Fried Souls and the Spectacular Final Sunday Sermon of the Right Revren Daddy Love”), a boy with magic Air Jordans that let him fly above the ball court (“Falcon Malone Can Fly No Mo”), a child who can disappear into Romare Bearden paintings (“Solomon’s Big Day: A Children’s Story”), mystified parents who discover their beloved little boy has somehow turned into a little Black Sambo (“The Sambomorphosis”), and Huggy Bear Jackson, whose 1983 Cadillac Cutlass Supreme custom convertible’s supernatural stereo plays only Stevie Wonder songs (“The Steviewondermobile”).With a fearlessness and style that recall the work of Langston Hughes and Ralph Ellison, Touré captures, through lyrical rhythms and relentless inventiveness, an America where magic can happen and Black is beautiful. The Portable Promised Land marks the entrance of a new and wildly compelling voice to American fiction.

    Always looking for a way to increase the church's profit margins, Hinshaw brainstorms a progressive nativity scene that will involve the whole town, complete with a map like those for the Hollywood stars. Neither Pastor Sam Gardner nor the other members of the Harmony Friends meeting express any enthusiasm for this idea, but Dale is unstoppable. Meanwhile, Pastor Sam has his own concerns: he's having his annual argument with his wife, and he's worried that the four-slotted toaster he bought for her may be too lavish a gift.Amidst the bustle of the season, the citizens of Harmony experience the simple joys and sometime loneliness that often go unseen. Sam comes to the realization that Dale, in his own misguided way, is only trying to draw meaning from the eternal story of Christmas. "In this unsettled world, it is good to have this steadiness -- the Christmas Eve service, the peal of the bell. . . .There is a holiness to memory, a sense of God's presence in these mangers of the mind. Which might explain why it is that the occasions that change the least are often the very occasions that change us the most."

    This handsome gift package boasts many extraordinary and unique features, including: Fully Turnable Pages Genuine Repackaging Remastered Binding Easy-to-Read Black Type Thousands of Commas A One-of-a-Kind ISBN Number Front-Wheel Drive, Dual Airbags and Rich Leather Interior Own the three Onion classics plus this beautiful box -- three books for the price of three!

    Little does she know, when she sets off toward the sea, that the first crew she joins will be composed of cats. Or that she herself will be hailed by a shipload of pirate steers as their captain's dairy queen. It's amoozing where a dream can take a girl -- a truth which Lisa Wheelerand Ponder Goembel relish here in rollicking words and witty, windblown pictures.

    But, then, I never wanted to be in AARP, either!"Barbara Johnson laughingly lifted millions of readers out of the depths of despair with her book Stick a Geranium in Your Hat and Be Happy. In that classic volume of humor and encouragement, she shared how God's gift of joy helped her survive the deaths of two sons and the eleven-year estrangement of another son who was lost in the homosexual lifestyle.Now that same laughter-lined attitude has sustained Barbara during a life-threatening battle with cancer?a battle in which she never lost her bubble of joy. Plant a Geranium in Your Cranium is the inspiring yet funny story of Barbara's journey through a year of illness, frustration?and abundant humor. It's a joyful chronicle of her own experiences combined with dozens of hilarious anecdotes and cartoons sent to her by others who share her belief in the healing power of laughter.

    Elmo's on Halloween night sporting Groucho Marx-style nose glasses. "This is the one night a year where Judd Nelson feels normal," says Tony. In this scene, Rob's sax-synching is so powerhouse that Demi, who's newly crimped hair makes her look like an albino Pointer Sister, is compelled to dry hump the jukebox. "I'm obsessed with this moment coming up," says Marcus, "where Rob starts clapping and says,'Let's rock!' I think he looks so awkward." Just then, his wife traipses in looking like Pat Benatar from the "Love Is a Battlefield" video. When Rob notices she's with another man, all hell breaks loose. "Get your hands off of my wife!" threatens Rob. "With narcissists," explains Dr. Beaverman, "everything belongs to them. They see everything as an extension of themselves. They are not independent objects." Dr. B takes a swig of Snapple and adds, ". . . .unlike whatever Demi's got stuffed into her bra which seems to have a mind of its own." "And check out that metallic lip gloss," says Tony. "It looks like she just went down on C3PO in the bathroom."-- Screening Party on "St. Elmo's Fire"It started as a series of articles for the British version of "Premiere", and "Instinct Magazine", but soon took on a life of it's own. Dennis Hensley, author of the bestseller Misadventures in the (213), has been getting together with 5 friends to watch and debate, rant, criticize, and reminisce about films that are both recognized classics and guilty pleasures. Partway through this deconstruction of memorable cinema, you will encounter this musing on Armageddon: "What girl would make out with her boyfriend in front of her dad?" wonders Tony, as Liv straddles Ben and sucks his face off while Willis and company look on. "She mounted him in a sundress in front of her dad."If you're tired of plodding through earnest studies of film's impact on society, these words alone should convince you that this book is anything but.

    With his manic mind and motor mouth in high gear, he rants against anyone who tells him to "have a nice day" and skewers the euphemism epidemic ("To be honest, some of this language makes me want to vomit. Well, perhaps 'vomit' is too strong a word. It makes me want to engage in a involuntary personal protein spill"). When Carlin's in a more reflective mood, he reveals, "I couldn't commit suicide if my life depended on it," and ponders the really big questions, like "Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?" and "Griddle cakes, pancakes, hotcakes, flapjacks: why are there four names for grilled batter and only one word for love? "What his candid take on "life's little moments" lacks in political correctness, it more than makes up for in gut-busting laughs. He's the guy who dares say what the rest of us hesitate even to think. And he does so in ways that are often raunchy and always riotous.

    "The Blitzed Brits" describes what life was like for the people who stayed at home in World War Two, including foul food facts about rotten rationing and awful evacuation tales. Both books are crammed full of curious quizzes, rotten recipes, gruesome games and terrible tests ...for teachers!

    In Mary Kay Andrews’s delectable New York Times bestseller, Savannah Blues, readers will feel the sultry Georgia breezes and taste sea salt in the air, as they lose themselves in a wonderful, witty tale brimming with sass and peopled by a richly endearing cast of delightfully eccentric characters. Revenge is sweeter than sweet in Mary Kay’s capable hands, and readers of Fannie Flagg, Adriana Trigiani, Emily Giffin, Rebecca Wells, and Jill Conner Browne will definitely want to spend some quality time in Savannah.

    Attention, citizens! Lock your doors and windows! Run for your lives! The Simpsons are busting out the bindings of their biggest and best book yet, and no one is safe from their maniacal comic madness! See Grampa Simpson embark on a new career as El Grampo, a modern day Zorro for the senior set, whose anarchistic shenanigans start to cramp the similarly–inspired protests of his grandson, Bart Simpson (a.k.a. El Barto). Behold the destructive power of censorship as Homer Simpson and the Comic Book Guy fight for their right to free speech and their very lives. Envison a local celebrity, Krusty the Clown, who comes to dinner and refuses to leave. Witness Mr. Burns' power mad scheme to undermine the economy of Springfield by paying his employees in jelly donuts. Observe a town caught in the thrall of an international media sensation, unable to separate themselves from the television chronicle of the life of one man䇯mer Simpson. These stories and many more can barely be contained in the new comic collection...Simpsons Comics Unchained!

    A collection of five novels: Immortality, Inc.; Minotaur Maze, Journey Beyond Tomorrow, Mindswap, and Dimension of Miracles.

    Uncle John and his loony lab partners will take you back to the Big Bang and forward to the distant future. You’ll see the science in everything around (and inside) you, and learn the truth about the most egregious science myths (such as—you can’t “sweat like a pig” because pigs don’t sweat). How many amazing facts await your visual cortex in these 494 pages made up of atoms (print version) or bits and bytes (e-book)? As Carl Sagan would have said, “Billions and Billions!” So put on your thinking cap and check out…Pluto deniedKitchen chemistryFootball gets physics-alPlanet Earth’s sudden hot flashesFood’s incredible journey…through youThe science of surfing, skating, and snowboardingHow they plugged the hole in the ozone layerHow “defenseless” animals stay aliveSci-fi that’s more fi than sciAncient astronomersKnow your cloudsAnd much, much more!

    Knights of the Dinner Table is the longest running comic on the subject of games ever! Though B.A., Brian, Bob, Dave and Sara may play different characters in different games, their personalities always shine through. KoDT also features articles for gamers from a gamer's perspective. A hilarious and hysterical slice of (fantasy) life in strips and a wonderful celebration of the gaming culture.

    Each boxed set also comes with a set of exclusive Simpsons postcards From the very first cartoon short to the 12th season, "The Simpsons" has gone from overnight success to cultural phenomenon to television's longest-running prime-time, animated show. Featuring highlights from more than 250 episodes, plot synopses, quotes, character profiles, couch gags, guest stars, and much more, "The Ultimate Simpsons in a Big Ol' Box" supplies twelve years of giggles and gurgles, chuckles and chortles, snickers and snorts, and hoots and howls that will delight everyone in one, BIG boxed set."The Simpsons: A Complete Guide to Our Family" (Seasons 1-8) This meticulously researched, colorfully rendered, exhaustively indexed, and lovingly fashioned episode guide provides memorable moments and little known facts that will make you an authority on the first eight seasons of "The Simpsons.""The Simpsons Forever " (Seasons 9 & 10) Continuing on from "The Simpsons: A Complete Guide to Our Favorite Family, The Simpsons Forever " provides more of everything you came to expect from the first volume. Focusing on Seasons 9 & 10, "The Simpsons Forever " features musical moments from "The Simpsons," including the Bart Simpson music videos along with a special tribute to the career of Troy McClure."The Simpsons Beyond Forever " (Seasons 11 & 12) Picking up where "The Simpsons Forever " left off, this newguide tells you everything thing you want to know and more than you think you already know about "The Simpsons." In this volume each episode gets a full two-page, full-color treatment that provides more art and more moments from your favorite episodes from the 11th & 12th Seasons.

    In this quirky and seductive new volume, 15-year-old Angelica stumbles on an annotated photo album belonging to her long-dead sister, Euphemia. The revelations within tell of fairy enchantments, wanton romance, and bawdy trysts. Angelica responds to the album in true character, and her fits of fairy pressings and squashings instigate terrible (if weirdly entertaining) consequences.Along with its mysterious tale of Cottington family deviance, this extraordinary artefact offers near-indisputable evidence of the existence of fairies in the form of letters and never-before-published Victorian photographs of actual fairies, authenticated by Brian Froud, the Cottington Archive, and the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Fairies. Fairies defiant, fairies au naturel, and, of course, fairies squashed: they're all here. Without doubt, Lady Cottington's Fairy Album will radically alter the study of the fairies' hereto-fore-secret world.

    G. Wodehouse, all featuring Jeeves and Bertie Wooster. It was first published in the United States on 20 June 1930 by Doubleday, Doran, New York, and in the United Kingdom on 4 July 1930 by Herbert Jenkins, London. The stories had all previously appeared in Strand Magazine in the UK and in Liberty or Cosmopolitan magazines in the US between 1926 and 1930.As well as Jeeves and his master Bertie Wooster, the stories also feature many regular characters, including Tuppy Glossop, Bingo Little, Bobbie Wickham, Aunt Dahlia, Aunt Agatha and Sir Roderick Glossop.Thank You, Jeeves is a Jeeves novel by P.G. Wodehouse, first published in the United Kingdom on March 16, 1934 by Herbert Jenkins, London, and in the United States on April 23, 1934 by Little, Brown and Company, New York.The story had previously been serialised, in the Strand Magazine in the UK from August 1933 to February 1934, and in the U.S. in Cosmopolitan from January to June 1934; it would later appear in the American Family Herald & Evening Star, between March 24 and August 11, 1937.

    A hilarious, irreverent, and gross behind-the-scenes look at Johnny Knoxville and his JACKASS crew as they challenge the unsuspecting with humour, gags and stunts that are out of this world

    I have written forty letters, but you've never read a line. Set to the tune of the song "Clementine," Alison Jackson tells the sweet tale of Valentine and her beau. Valentine goes about her day, doing chores around her mountain cabin, while her secret admirer is hard at work trying to ask her an important question. He tries many ways to contact her, including Morse code and smoke signals, but he can never complete his message. Will he ever be able to reach his beloved Valentine?

    Together in one volume:Still Pumped from Using the Mouse (1996)Casual Day Has Gone Too Far (1997)I'm not Anti-Business, I'm Anti-Idiot (1998)

    More than a collection of Liberty Meadow strips dating back to 1997, this book also boasts completely retouched art and colored Sunday strips, as well as illustrations not available anywhere else.

    Containing over 150 cartoons that stretch across the length of Wilson's ouevre, Gravediggers' Party is a pumpkin-stuffing collection of the weird and the wild, the strange and the supernatural, appreciated by only the most discerning ghoul. (You know who you are.)

    For the troubled, it is a place to find those who will help them in beating back the darkness. For those lucky enough to find it, their lives will never again be the same. The name of the place is Bulfinche's Pub. These are their stories. This is Murphy's Lore. In the 3rd book in this critically acclaimed fantasy humor series, a hitman attempts to cheat the devil; a knight tries to save a dragon in the sewers under NYC; Death witnesses a murder so foul that even he cannot allow the killer to go free; Uncle Sam is found to be running a not so secret government agency; Coyote answers a prayer; Guardian Angels try to capture the renegade seraph Mathew & his succubus wife Ryth; the Devil tries to take his revenge on Paddy Moran & friends; & Paddy finds the ultimate billboard-the Moon. Includes stories published in FANTASIC STORIES, PADWOLF PRESENTS, THE DNA HELIX ed. by Warine Lapine & THE 2nd COMING anthology. Praise for Murphy's Lore "HUMOR, OUTRAGEOUS ADVENTURES, & SOME CLEVER PLOT TWISTS."-Don D'Ammassa, SCIENCE FICTION CHRONICLE "Don't miss the latest installment of this wonderful series."-Ed McFadden, FANTASTIC STORIES "SLICK... ENTERTAINING."-Paul Di Filippo, ASIMOV'S Don't miss MURPHY'S LORE: TALES FROM BULFINCHE'S PUB & FOOLS' DAY

    

    Don't Tell Me! is NPR’s weekly hour-long quiz program. Each week on the radio listeners test their knowledge against a panel of the best and brightest in the news and entertainment world: Adam Felber; Roy Blount, Jr.; Paula Poundstone; Mo Rocca; Roxanne Roberts; Charlie Pierce; and others. This two-disk set features highlights from the popular “Not My Job” segment of the show, during which celebrity guest contestants answer questions on topics unrelated to their particular area of expertise and compete for the ultimate prize: NPR veteran announcer Carl Kasell’s voice on a lucky listener’s answering machine.

    The collection encompasses essays, short stories, plays, and novels, with Queenan's insightful biographies of each featured writer. Selections include engaging, readable works by early wits ranging from Oscar Wilde to Mark Twain, and excerpts from The Prince by Machiavelli; "A Modest Proposal" by Jonathan Swift; "Justine" by the Marquis de Sade; as well as works by Rabelais, Moliere, Ben Johnson, Aristophanes, George Bernard Shaw, Jane Austen, and other wits.

    "This, the first posthumous anthology of his work, compiled with the co-operation of his closest circle, provides a comprehensive guide to Milligan's work" -- Book jacket.

    A Few More Pretty Good Jokes features all the jokes from the most recent shows which aired in April 2000 and 2002 (both were done in New York). These recordings are a welcome supplement to the highly successful previous Joke Book, Tape, and CD.

    Because of the war effort, most of the mothers, big sisters, and aunts were working in the factories while most of the fathers, big brothers, and uncles were off at war. Nonna always knew just what to say. Gifted with a native ability to tell stories, her solution for every one of Vincent's questions or problems was another elaborate story, accompanied by cups of coffee. And such stories they are! Angels and saints take on peasant charm, God paints peacocks' tails, and the humble good Joe always finishes first. Pull up a chair. You can almost smell the coffee. A Servant Book.

    How ridiculous. How sublime. How biting, ironic and funny. And here are the first seven episodes, of the series that does to World War Two -- and the twentieth century -- what they need done.

    Golden Kimball was known as the Swearing Apostle. Raised as a cowboy, he peppered his sermons with frontier wit and wisdom. James Kimball has collected hundreds of his famous great-uncle's stories in these two warmly affection volumes.

    These people do not have children. They have nice things. They collect fragile pottery. They have candlelit dinners in fancy restaurants. They go to the movies. They have white carpets. People with small children haven't been to a restaurant without plastic silverware in years. The last movie they saw in a theater is now on American Movie Classics. Their house looks like it was decorated by Pee-Wee Herman. Baby's First Tattoo is for them.For years parents have been buying baby books to document all the precious moments in their new baby's life--Baby's First Tooth, Baby's First Haircut, Baby's First Step. What have been ignored for too long are those "alternative" precious moments that really should be written down, celebrated, and remembered--Baby's First Projectile Vomit, Baby's First Tantrum in a Crowded Grocery Store, Baby's 10,000th Dirty Diaper. Otherwise you might forget them and think of becoming parents once again.

    

    . . If you are not yet aware of The Darwin Awards, you should probably be pitched out of the breeding population . . . A delicious sermon in support of common sense. The Baltimore Sun

    From stupefying stunts to wacky world’s records, all of Ripley’s riveting findings are here, in an easy-to-browse, impossible-to-put-down color volume. Where else could you learn that: • It’s estimated that 10,000,000,000,000,000,000, 000,000,000,000,000 snowflakes have fallen to the Earth since the Earth was formed! • Queen Isabeau of Bavaria used a mixture of boar’s brains, crocodile glands, and wolf blood as skin lotion! • Anna Bread married John Butter in Leeds, England, April 22, 1926! • Phil Turco of Madison, Wisconsin, swallowed 339 goldfish in two hours! Bizarre and amazing categories include Accidents and Disasters, Animals and Insects, Archaeology, Feats and Stunts, Prophecies, Records, the Unexplained, and more. It’s fascinating fun for the whole family.

    Betty is so close to Jesus, He's given her His loaves and fish recipe. And only Betty knows how many shopping days there are until the Apocalypse. As she is fond of saying: "If God created me in His image, I have more than returned the compliment!" In Prada and in prayer, Betty has devoted her life to bringing people the Good News: They are going straight to Hell. Thousands have aspired to emulate her joie d'apres vivre by logging on to her popular website, bettybowers.com. But only now, with What Would Betty Do? does she finally reveal her spiritual survival secrets. You'll discover how, come Judgment Day, to be whisked through the 10 Sins or Less express line. But first, you will have to learn how to vote (for God's Own Party, the Republicans), whom to hate (Lie-berals and other non-Baptists), and what to throw (a soirée -- and then a few stones!). "After all," warns Betty, "if Heaven is just going to involve running into all the people you avoided on Earth, what would be the point?" Unchic? Unsaved? Wavering faith? Wandering hands? A pair of $650 Manolo Blahnik pumps that won't go with anything? No problem! Just ask yourself -- What would Betty do?

    Cartoons and jokes.

    

    There are high moos and low moos; there are moos that are jiggly and moos that are wriggly. Moos that sound funny through a funnel and even odder in a tunnel. Deborah Fajerman is a gifted new, young author/artist whose lively text and spirited illustrations mark her out as a picture book creator of ingenuity and wit.

    G. Wodehouse-brings together the best of his much admired commentary on the great man's words to form the perfect companion to the nearly one hundred novels of "the most consistently funny writer the English language has yet produced" ("The Times"). "Plum Sauce" also contains snippets of Wodehouse's most outrageously hilarious prose, organized in categories from Animals ("Beach's bullfinch continued to chirp reflectively to itself, like a man trying to remember a tune in his bath") to menservants ("Jeeves lugged my purple socks out of the drawer as if he were a vegetarian fishing a caterpillar out of a salad"). Usborne introduces in depth all the beloved major characters-Jeeves and Wooster, Psmith, Ukridge, Uncle Fred, Lord Emsworth, and the Blandings circle-and sketches the rest of the Wodehouse cast-from Gussie Fink-Nottle to the chorus of Aunts and Drones. Lavishly illustrated with original dust jacket artwork and sketches from the "Strand Magazine, Plum Sauce" is the ultimate source for both aficionados and novices just beginning to "scratch the old lemon."

    Miller's irreverent, satiric wit, combined with his superbly crafted illustrations, confirms once and for all that the universe is one big joke at humanity's expense.

    There’s never been anyone like Gooney Bird Greene at Watertower Elementary School. What other new kid comes to school wearing pajamas and cowboy boots one day and a polka-dot t-shirt and tutu on another? Gooney Bird has to sit right smack in the middle of the class because she likes to be in the middle of everything. She is the star of story time and keeps her teacher and classmates on the edge of their seats with her “absolutely true” stories. But what about her classmates? Do they have stories good enough to share?

    Its been known to make men turn championship wrestling off, large women in double knit polyester slacks dance, and derelict children smile. That's why Ruby Ann has taken the time to write down her favorite recipes in an easy to read cookbook (The Down Home Trailer Park Cookbook; A Twister Of Tasty Treats).This cookbook gives the reader a titillating guide to handed down recipes and an insider's look at Ruby Ann's fellow residents at the 20 lot "High Chaparral Trailer Park" in Pangburn, Arkansas. Along with good food and gossip, the reader will come face to face with sex, murder, topless dancing, Baptist ministers, adultery, and political secrets. The fact that Ruby Ann Boxcar has lived her entire life in a trailer, and her updo hairstyle, cat eyed glasses, and blue eye shadow insures the reader she knows what she's talking about when it comes to trailer park living. Her 300-pound figure speaks for itself on the question of her cooking credentials.

    On sultry summer nights, hapless mortals are prey to the deceptions of undines, ravishing mermaids and dangerous nixies. Languid summer makes way for the infernal dance of the evil spirits of autumn, a witches'' Sabbath attended by kobolds, succubi and nightmare spirits. From Earth's lower depths come the rumblings of armies of dwarves and gnomes preparing to burst out to the surface. Winter follows, the season when the Nordic gods sweep through on their doomed hunt for Asgard, harbingers of Christmas visitors attended by the nisses and tomtes of the Great North. Still farther north, Earth trembles beneath the footsteps of giant trolls.A spellbinding book, superbly illustrated by enchanting and sometimes terrifying images, that must surely rank as a passport to the Enchanted Kingdom.

    These are the routines that made him nationally famous.

    Tom and Ray have gathered the most outrageous and humorous segments from their weekly call-in radio show, including "Eggs Prestone," "Bad Hair Days," "Clinton Sends Vowels to Bosnia," "Gail, the Tollgate Fugitive," and the Tappet Brothers personal favorite, the tale of Max and his little Schnauzer.