How to Be Alone: If You Want To, and Even If You Don't


Lane Moore - 2018
    But her story has had its obstacles, including being her own parent, living in her car as a teenager, and moving to New York City to pursue her dreams. Through it all, she looked to movies, TV, and music as the family and support systems she never had.From spending the holidays alone to having better “stranger luck” than with those closest to her to feeling like the last hopeless romantic on earth, Lane reveals her powerful and entertaining journey in all its candor, anxiety, and ultimate acceptance—with humor always her bolstering force and greatest gift.How to Be Alone is a must-read for anyone whose childhood still feels unresolved, who spends more time pretending to have friends online than feeling close to anyone in real life, who tries to have genuine, deep conversations in a roomful of people who would rather you not. Above all, it’s a book for anyone who desperately wants to feel less alone and a little more connected through reading her words.

The Boy Crisis: Why Our Boys Are Struggling and What We Can Do about It


Warren Farrell - 2019
    For the first time in American history, our sons will have less education than their dads. It's a crisis of mental health. As boys become young men, their suicide rates go from equal to girls to six times that of young women. It's a crisis of sexuality. Sex is a minefield for our sons. They're bombarded with mixed messages, afraid of being either too sensitive or not sensitive enough. It's a crisis of fathering. Boys with less-involved fathers are more likely to drop out of school, drink, do drugs, become delinquent, and end up in prison. It's a crisis of purpose. Boys' old senses of purposes, being a warrior, a leader, or a sole breadwinner, are fading. Many bright boys are experiencing a "purpose void," feeling alienated, withdrawn and addicted to immediate gratification. Compounding this issue are addicting video games that lead to distraction and ADHD.So, what is The Boy Crisis? A comprehensive blueprint for what parents, teachers, and policy-makers can do to renew our sons' sense of purpose to help them become men, fathers, and leaders worthy of our respect.

Living with limerence: A guide for the smitten


Dr. L. - 2020
    

What My Mother and I Don't Talk About: Fifteen Writers Break the Silence


Michele Filgate - 2019
    It took her more than a decade to realize what she was actually trying to write: how this affected her relationship with her mother. When it was finally published, the essay went viral, shared on social media by Anne Lamott, Rebecca Solnit, and many others. The outpouring of responses gave Filgate an idea, and the resulting anthology offers a candid look at our relationships with our mothers. While some of the writers in this book are estranged from their mothers, others are extremely close. Leslie Jamison writes about trying to discover who her seemingly perfect mother was before ever becoming a mom. In Cathi Hanauer’s hilarious piece, she finally gets a chance to have a conversation with her mother that isn’t interrupted by her domineering (but lovable) father. André Aciman writes about what it was like to have a deaf mother. Melissa Febos uses mythology as a lens to look at her close-knit relationship with her psychotherapist mother. And Julianna Baggott talks about having a mom who tells her everything. As Filgate writes, “Our mothers are our first homes, and that’s why we’re always trying to return to them.” There’s relief in breaking the silence. Acknowledging what we couldn’t say for so long is one way to heal our relationships with others and, perhaps most important, with ourselves. Contributors include Cathi Hanauer, Melissa Febos, Alexander Chee, Dylan Landis, Bernice L. McFadden, Julianna Baggott, Lynn Steger Strong, Kiese Laymon, Carmen Maria Machado, André Aciman, Sari Botton, Nayomi Munaweera, Brandon Taylor, and Leslie Jamison.

Nobody Passes: Rejecting the Rules of Gender and Conformity


Mattilda Bernstein Sycamore - 2006
    By examining the perilous intersections of identity, categorization, and community, contributors challenge societal mores and countercultural norms. Nobody Passes explores and critiques the various systems of power seen (or not seen) in the act of “passing.” In a pass-fail situation, standards for acceptance may vary, but somebody always gets trampled on. This anthology seeks to eliminate the pressure to pass and thereby unearth the delicious and devastating opportunities for transformation that might create.Mattilda, aka Matt Bernstein Sycamore, has a history of editing anthologies based on brazen nonconformity and gender defiance. Mattilda sets out to ask the question, “What lies are people forced to tell in order to gain acceptance as 'real'.” The answers are as varied as the life experiences of the writers who tackle this urgent and essential topic.

Getting Grief Right: Finding Your Story of Love in the Sorrow of Loss


Patrick O'Malley - 2017
    What he shared was a truth that many have felt but rarely acknowledged by the professionals they turn to: that our grief is not a mental illness to be cured, but part of the abiding connection with the one we’ve lost. Illuminated by O’Malley’s own story and those of many clients that he’s supported, readers learn how the familiar "stages of grief" too often mislabel our sorrow as a disorder, press us to "get over it," and amplify our suffering with shame and guilt when we do not achieve "closure" in due course. "Sadness, regret, confusion, yearning—all the experiences of grief—are a part of the narrative of love," reflects O’Malley. Here, with uncommon sensitivity and support, he invites us to explore grief not as a process of recovery, but as the ongoing narrative of our relationship with the one we’ve lost—to be fully felt, told, and woven into our lives. For those in bereavement and anyone supporting those who are, Getting Grief Right offers an uncommonly empathetic guide to opening to our sorrow as the full expression of our love.

Thriving in Sex Work: Heartfelt Advice for Staying Sane in the Sex Industry


Lola Davina - 2017
    The adult industry is riddled with pitfalls and dangers. Erotic labor is often emotionally demanding, draining, and complex. It can be hard to know who to turn to for advice on keeping yourself safe and sane. Lola Davina, former stripper, dominatrix, porn actress and escort, provides the life skills you need to prosper: · Shattering myths, such as thinking you need the “perfect” body· Creating financial freedom so you only work when you want to· Avoiding bad behavior, bad decisions, and burnout· Cultivating boundaries in an often insane industry· Learning to love your work!Thriving in sex work means having a healthy body, mind, heart, and bank account. No matter your job title or gender, whether you’re independent or work for someone else, if you want to succeed in sex work, this book is for you.“I LOVE THIS BOOK SO MUCH! Lola Davina brings the insight, advice and compassion that only a centered, wise, experienced sex work veteran can cultivate and gather: her insider knowledge makes this book a powerful ally to any sex worker who wants a better life. Fierce, smart, pragmatic and loving — I can’t recommend it highly enough.”—Carol Queen, PhD Author, founding director of the Center for Sex & Culture

The Easy Peasy Way to Quit Porn


Hackauthor² - 2020
    It won’t place any judgement, embarrassment, or pressure to undergo painful measures.In fact, there’s absolutely no need to cut down or reduce your usage whilst reading; doing so is actually detrimental.Perhaps this goes against everything you’ve been told, but ask yourself if what you’ve been told has worked? If it had, you wouldn’t be reading this hackbook.Pornography addiction manifests in various ways with far-reaching societal effects. Many people use pornography because the internet allows instantaneous access to supernormal stimuli. Consider if the following questions apply to you.- Do you spend far more time viewing porn than you originally intended?- Are you unsuccessful in efforts to stop or limit your consumption of pornography?- Has time spent viewing pornography interfered with, or taken precedence over personal or professional commitments, hobbies, or relationships in your life?- Do you go out of your way to keep your pornography consumption secret (e.g. deleting browser history, lying about viewing porn)?- Has viewing pornography caused significant problems in intimate relationship(s)?- Do you experience a cycle of arousal and enjoyment before and during pornography consumption, followed by feelings of shame, guilt, and remorse after?- Do you spend significant amounts of time thinking about pornography, even when not watching it?- Has viewing pornography caused any other negative consequences in your personal or professional life (e.g. missed work, poor performance, neglected relationships, financial problems)?If you’re a porn user that depends on it for masturbation or sex, all you need to do is read on. If you’re here for a loved one, all you need to do is persuade them to read this book. If unable to persuade them, read the book yourself. Understanding the method assists getting the message across and preventing your children from starting. Don’t be fooled by the fact that they don’t have access to it now – all do before getting hooked.

Sexual Personae: Art and Decadence from Nefertiti to Emily Dickinson


Camille Paglia - 1990
    It ultimately challenges the cultural assumptions of both conservatives and traditional liberals. 47 photographs.

Skin Picking: The Freedom to Finally Stop


Annette Pasternak - 2014
    Step-by-step she leads you through: 1) Exercises to help you to break the habit of the behavior. 2) Techniques to reduce stress and anxiety naturally, thus reducing the body’s need to pick. 3) How to release negative thoughts and emotions holding you back.4) Lifestyle changes to restore physiological balance, including which foods to avoid, which to eat more of, and natural supplements to help you stop. This comprehensive guide is a lifesaver for those suffering from skin picking, and is invaluable also for health professionals interested in learning how to help their patients who pick.

Simians, Cyborgs, and Women: The Reinvention of Nature


Donna J. Haraway - 1990
    Although on the surface, simians, cyborgs and women may seem an odd threesome, Haraway describes their profound link as creatures which have had a great destabilizing place in Western evolutionary technology and biology. Throughout this book, Haraway analyzes accounts, narratives, and stories of the creation of nature, living organisms, and cyborgs. At once a social reality and a science fiction, the cyborg--a hybrid of organism and machine--represents transgressed boundaries and intense fusions of the nature/culture split. By providing an escape from rigid dualisms, the cyborg exists in a post-gender world, and as such holds immense possibilities for modern feminists. Haraway's recent book, Primate Visions, has been called outstanding, original, and brilliant, by leading scholars in the field. (First published in 1991.)

Revolution at Point Zero: Housework, Reproduction, and Feminist Struggle


Silvia Federici - 2012
    Originally inspired by Federici's organizational work in the Wages for Housework movement, the topics discussed include the international restructuring of reproductive work and its effects on the sexual division of labor, the globalization of care work and sex work, the crisis of elder care, and the development of affective labor. Both a brief history of the international feminist movement and a contemporary critique of capitalism, these writings continue the investigation of the economic roots of violence against women.

Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good


Adrienne Maree Brown - 2019
    Drawing on the black feminist tradition, including Audre Lourde’s invitation to use the erotic as power and Toni Cade Bambara’s exhortation that we make the revolution irresistible, the contributors to this volume take up the challenge to rethink the ground rules of activism. Writers including Cara Page of the Astraea Lesbian Foundation For Justice, Sonya Renee Taylor, founder of This Body Is Not an Apology, and author Alexis Pauline Gumbs cover a wide array of subjects— from sex work to climate change, from race and gender to sex and drugs—creating new narratives about how politics can feel good and how what feels good always has a complex politics of its own.Building on the success of her popular Emergent Strategy, brown launches a new series of the same name with this volume, bringing readers books that explore experimental, expansive, and innovative ways to meet the challenges that face our world today. Books that find the opportunity in every crisis!

It's All Politics: Winning in a World Where Hard Work and Talent Aren't Enough


Kathleen Kelley Reardon - 2005
    You cannot afford to be apolitical at work if you have any aspirations for advancement. The only way to avoid politics is to avoid people—by finding an out-of-the-way corner where you can do your job. Of course, it’s the same job you’ll likely be doing for the rest of your career.In any job, when you reach a certain level of technical competence, politics is what makes all the difference with regard to success. At that point, it is indeed all politics. Everyday brilliant people take a backseat to their politically adept colleagues by failing to win crucial support for their ideas. Sometimes politics involves going around or bending rules, but more typically it’s about positioning your ideas in a favorable light, and knowing what to say, and how and when to say it.…Keep in mind that people benefit from perpetuating the image of politics as something you either know or you don’t. Ignore them. Political acumen is largely learned from observation. And then it’s a matter of practice, practice, practice. When a journalist suggested that golfing great Gary Player was very lucky, he replied: “It’s funny, but the more I practice, the luckier I get.” The same is true of politics.An indispensable guide to mastering the ins and outs of office politics—the single most important factor in getting ahead in your careerAs management professor and consultant Kathleen Reardon explains in her new book, It's All Politics, talent and hard work alone will not get you to the top. What separates the winners from the losers in corporate life is politics.As Reardon explains, the most talented and accomplished employees often take a backseat to their politically adept coworkers, losing ground in the race to get ahead—sometimes even losing their jobs. Why? Because they’ve failed to manage the important relationships with the people who can best reward their creativity and intelligence. To determine whether you need a crash course in Office Politics 101, ask yourself the following questions:Do I get credit for my ideas?Do I know how to deal with a difficult colleague?Do I get the plum assignments?Do I have a mentor?Do I say no gracefully and pick my battles wisely?Am I in the loop?Reardon has interviewed hundreds of employees, from successful veterans to aspiring hopefuls, examining why some people who work hard and effectively at their jobs fall behind, while those who are adept at “reading the office tea leaves” forge ahead. Being politically savvy doesn’t mean being unethical or devious. At heart, it’s about listening to and relating to others, and making choices that advance everyone’s goals. Like it or not, when it comes to work, it’s all politics. And politics is all about knowing what to say, when to say it, and who to say it to.

Love Bombing: Reset Your Child's Emotional Thermostat


Oliver James - 2012
    It is simple to do, easily explained and works for both severe and mild problems from aged three to early teenage. Many, if not most, parents feel that their children may have missed out in some way during the early years. Offering a simple, relatively trouble-free self-help method for putting that right is what parents are waiting for. "This book is written in highly accessible language", assures Oliver James. "The method is explained as simply as possible, illustrated with cases". "Love Bombing is a very simple technique which helps most children from aged three to early teenage. Because so many parents are, or have had, periods of living very busy or miserable or complicated lives, most of us need to reconnect with our children from time to time. Love Bombing does the job," explains James.