I Just Want to Pee Alone: A Collection of Humorous Essays by Kick Ass Mom Bloggers


Stacey HattonNicole Leigh Shaw - 2013
    Raising kids is hard work. The pay sucks, your boss is a tyrant, and the working conditions are pitiful – you can't even take a bathroom break without being interrupted with another outrageous demand. Hasn't every mother said it before? “I just want to pee alone!” I Just Want to Pee Alone is a collection of hilarious essays from 37 of the most kick ass mom bloggers on the web. Including: People I Want to Punch in the Throat, Insane in the Mom-Brain, The Divine Secrets of a Domestic Diva, Baby Sideburns, and Rants From Mommyland. Read hysterical essays like: Embarrassment, Thy Name is Motherhood A Pinterest-Perfect Mom, I am Not And Then There was that Time a Priest Called Me a Terrible Mother So She Thought She Could Cut Off My Stroller

Of Mess and Moxie: Wrangling Delight Out of This Wild and Glorious Life


Jen Hatmaker - 2017
    Women have been demonstrating resiliency and resolve since forever. They have incredibly strong shoulders to bear loss, hope, grief, and vision. She laughs at the days to come is how the ancient wisdom writings put it.But somehow women have gotten the message that pain and failure mean they must be doing things wrong, that they messed up the rules or tricks for a seamless life. As it turns out, every last woman faces confusion and loss, missteps and catastrophic malfunctions, no matter how much she is doing "right." Struggle doesn't mean they're weak; it means they're alive.Jen Hatmaker, beloved author, Big Sister Emeritus, and Chief BFF, offers another round of hilarious tales, frank honesty, and hope for the woman who has forgotten her moxie. Whether discussing the grapple with change ("Everyone, be into this thing I'm into! Except when I'm not. Then everyone be cool.") or the time she drove to the wrong city for a fourth-grade field trip ("Why are we in San Antonio?"), Jen parlays her own triumphs and tragedies into a sigh of relief for all normal, fierce women everywhere who, like her, sometimes hide in the car eating crackers but also want to get back up and get back out, to live undaunted "in the moment" no matter what the moments hold.

Any Ordinary Day: Blindsides, Resilience and What Happens After the Worst Day of Your Life


Leigh Sales - 2018
    But one particular string of bad news stories – and a terrifying brush with her own mortality – sent her looking for answers about how vulnerable each of us is to a life-changing event. What are our chances of actually experiencing one? What do we fear most and why? And when the worst does happen, what comes next?In this wise and layered book, Leigh talks intimately with people who’ve faced the unimaginable, from terrorism to natural disaster to simply being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Expecting broken lives, she instead finds strength, hope, even humour. Leigh brilliantly condenses the cutting-edge research on the way the human brain processes fear and grief, and poses the questions we too often ignore out of awkwardness. Along the way, she offers an unguarded account of her own challenges and what she’s learned about coping with life’s unexpected blows.Warm, candid and empathetic, this book is about what happens when ordinary people, on ordinary days, are forced to suddenly find the resilience most of us don’t know we have.

The Idiot Girls' Action-Adventure Club: True Tales from a Magnificent and Clumsy Life


Laurie Notaro - 2002
    Every day she fearlessly rises from bed to defeat the evil machinations of dolts, dimwits, and creepy boyfriends—and that’s before she even puts on a bra.For the past ten years, Notaro has been entertaining Phoenix newspaper readers with her wildly amusing autobiographical exploits and unique life experiences. She writes about a world of hourly-wage jobs that require absolutely no skills, a mother who hands down judgments more forcefully than anyone seated on the Supreme Court, horrific high school reunions, and hangovers that leave her surprised that she woke up in the first place.The misadventures of Laurie and her fellow Idiot Girls (“too cool to be in the Smart Group”) unfold in a world that everyone will recognize but no one has ever described so hilariously. She delivers the goods: life as we all know it.

Confessions of a Reformed Dieter


A.J. Rochester - 2001
    Enough is enough. She vows to lose weight—not because she yearns to become a pretzel, but so she can keep up with her little boy and turn her life around at last. But after years of trying and failing, AJ knows she needs a miracle to drop eight dress sizes, so she agrees to be a human guinea pig and record her weekly progress in front of a camera for a television program on body image. In Confessions AJ shares her incredible journey, from her first close encounters with a nutritionist, personal trainer and psychologist to overcoming an early cataclysmic fall off the wagon—waking up in hospital with a broken leg after downing her first cocktail in weeks on an empty stomach—and the triumph of shedding that first few pounds. The result is a funny, insightful and inspiring account of a woman who lost more than half her body weight without losing her sense of humor—and discovered a whole new life.

Choose Wonder Over Worry: Move Beyond Fear and Doubt to Unlock Your Full Potential


Amber Rae - 2018
    Journey with inspirational speaker and artist AMBER RAE as she connects you with your voice of worry and wonder, teaches you to listen to your emotions rather than silence them, and encourages you to seize your dreams. Through a thoughtful blend of vulnerability, soulfulness, and science, Amber Rae guides you in expressing the fullness of who you are and the gifts you’re here to give.You don’t have to be held back by Worry when Wonder awaits you every moment of every day.Worry or Wonder: which will you choose?

Easy Crafts for the Insane: A Mostly Funny Memoir of Mental Illness and Making Things


Kelly Williams Brown - 2021
    Her marriage collapsed, she broke three limbs in separate and unrelated incidents, her father was diagnosed with cancer, and she fell into a deep depression that ended in what could delicately be referred to as a “rest cure” at an inpatient facility. Before that, she had several very good years: she wrote a bestselling book, spoke at NASA, had a beautiful wedding, and inspired hundreds of thousands of readers to live as grown-ups in an often-screwed-up world, though these accomplishments mostly just made her feel fraudulent. One of the few things that kept her moving forward was, improbably, crafting. Not Martha Stewart–perfect crafting, either—what could be called “simple,” “accessible” or, perhaps, “rustic” creations were the joy and accomplishments she found in her worst days. To craft is to set things right in the littlest of ways; no matter how disconnected you feel, you can still fold a tiny paper star, and that’s not nothing. In Easy Crafts for the Insane, crafting tutorials serve as the backdrop of a life dissolved, then glued back together. Surprising, humane, and utterly unforgettable, this is a poignant and hysterical look at the unexpected, messy coping mechanisms we use to find ourselves again.

The Drop 10 Diet: Add to Your Plate to Lose the Weight


Lucy Danziger - 2012
    But now you can lose weight without deprivation: Lucy Danziger, editor in chief of SELF magazine, and her team of nutrition experts have created the ultimate flexible plan for melting off ten, twenty, or more pounds at any age—you can see results in as little as a week! By eating more of thirty superfoods—everyday favorites like eggs, yogurt, steak, Parmesan, cherries, kiwi fruit, dark chocolate, and coffee (yes, chocolate and coffee!)—you can shed weight while naturally reducing your dependence on less healthful foods, lowering your risk for diabetes, heart disease, cancer, inflammation, and more. The food plan has room for all your can’t-resist treats—you can eat them and still slim down!   This revolutionary diet isn’t about denying yourself; it’s about indulging in delicious, satisfying foods that help trigger weight loss and instill better body health. Guiding you every step of the way, The Drop 10 Diet includes   • 101 quick, tasty breakfasts, lunches, snacks, and dinners. You choose your favorites. Each meal or snack incorporates at least one Drop 10 superfood and leaves your cravings and your stomach satisfied! • 40 delicious family recipes that even a novice cook can fix. Your loved ones will never know they’re eating healthfully! • 1,400 extra “happy calories” each week to enjoy on top of your Drop 10 meals and snacks. Use your happy calories for daily splurges (ice cream!) or save them up to spend for a big night out (Mexican? Bring on the nachos!). • 8 exercises you can do at home or in the gym to boost your metabolism and supercharge your weight loss. • Inspirational stories of weight loss from women just like you!   Don’t waste another bite on bland, strict diets that don’t work. It’s time to grab life by the fork!

Period. It's About Bloody Time


Emma Barnett - 2019
    Period. is an agenda-setting manifesto to remove the stigma and myths continuing to surround the female body. Bold and unapologetic, Emma Barnett is on a crusade to ignite conversation among women--and men--everywhere.

The Hacker's Diet: How to Lose Weight and Hair Through Stress and Poor Nutrition


John Walker - 1991
    Nor am I a nutritionist, psychologist, sports hero, gourmet chef, or any of the other vocations that seem to qualify people to tell you how to lose weight.I'm an engineer by training, a computer programmer by avocation, and an businessman through lack of alternatives. From grade school in the 1950's until 1988 I was fat--anywhere from 30 to 80 pounds overweight. This is a diet book by somebody who spent most of his life fat.The absurdity of my situation finally struck home in 1987. ``Look,'' I said to myself, ``you founded one of the five biggest software companies in the world, Autodesk. You wrote large pieces of AutoCAD, the world standard for computer aided design. You've made in excess of fifty million dollars without dropping dead, going crazy, or winding up in jail. You've succeeded at some pretty difficult things, and you can't control your flippin' weight?''Through all the years of struggling with my weight, the fad diets, the tedious and depressing history most fat people share, I had never, even once, approached controlling my weight the way I'd work on any other problem: a malfunctioning circuit, a buggy program, an ineffective department in my company.As an engineer, I was trained to solve problems. As a software developer, I designed tools to help others solve their problems. As a businessman I survived and succeeded by managing problems. And yet, all that time, I hadn't looked at my own health as something to be investigated, managed, and eventually solved in the same way. I decided to do just that.This book is a compilation of what I learned. Six months after I decided being fat was a problem to be solved, not a burden to be endured, I was no longer overweight. Since then, my weight hasn't varied by more than a few pounds. I'm hungry less often at 145 pounds than I was at 215. I look better, feel great, and have more energy for the things I enjoy. I spend only a few minutes a day maintaining this happy situation. And I know I'll be able to control my weight from now on, because I have the tools I need, the will to use them, and the experience to know they work.The tools are now in your hands.Live long and prosper.

It's Not Me, It's You


Jon Richardson - 2011
    (Women who leave wet teaspoons in sugar bowls need not apply)."I haven't woken up with a cup of tea by the bed for seven years. It seems such a small thing but it's one of a thousand things I miss about having someone around to take care of me. I have spent my entire adult life getting things the way I want them and all I want now is someone to give it all up for." Jon RichardsonIs your filing faultless? Your CDs, apostrophes, cutlery all in the right places? Can you eat a biscuit in the correct way? Then Jon Richardson (single for seven years and counting) could be your ideal man.Living alone in a one bedroom flat in Swindon, 27 year old Jon has had far too much time on his hands to think. In fact to obsess. About almost everything. Jon's obsessive compulsive personality disorder has seen him arrange the coins in his pockets in ascending size and colour code his bookshelves. It takes him less than 90 seconds to locate a receipt for a pair of shoes he bought in 1997. Over to the filing cabinet and R for receipts, S for shoes.But Jon doesn't want to be like this, in fact he would quite like to share his life with someone. But who could that someone be? Someone like himself, a quarrelsome perfectionist only with breasts and less body hair? Absolutely not. But who exactly is Jon looking for and where will he find her? Faced with a loveless future filled with his own peculiar quirks and perfectionism, Jon sets about his search for The One. The question is, will he mind her keeping the knives to the left of the forks in the cutlery drawer or organising the CDs by genre and not alphabetically?

My Mess Is a Bit of a Life: Adventures in Anxiety


Georgia Pritchett - 2021
    Her book is a delightful and perfect reflection of her. Its tenderness sneaks up on you and really packs a punch. What a magnificent read!"--Julia Louis DreyfusJenny Lawson meets Nora Ephron in this joyful memoir-in-vignettes on living--and thriving--with anxiety from a multiple Emmy Award-winning comedy writer whose credits include Succession and Veep.When Georgia Pritchett found herself lost for words--a bit of a predicament for a comedy writer--she turned to a therapist, who suggested she try writing down some of the things that worried her. But instead of a grocery list of concerns, Georgia wrote this book.A natural born worrywart, Georgia's life has been defined by her quirky anxiety. During childhood, she was agitated about the monsters under her bed (Were they comfy enough?). Going into labor, she fretted about making a fuss ("Sorry to interrupt, but the baby is coming out of my body," I said politely). Winning a prestigious award, she agonized over receiving free gifts after the ceremony (It was an excruciating experience. Mortifying).Soul-baring yet lighthearted, poignant yet written with a healthy dose of self-deprecation, My Mess Is a Bit of a Life is a tour through the carnival funhouse of Georgia's life, from her anxiety-ridden early childhood where disaster loomed around every corner (When I was little I used to think that sheep were clouds that had fallen to earth. On cloudy days I used to worry that I would be squashed by a sheep), through the challenges of breaking into an industry dominated by male writers, to the exquisite terror (and incomparable joy) of raising children.Delightfully offbeat, painfully honest, full of surprising wonders, and delivering plenty of hilarious, laugh-out-loud moments, My Mess Is a Bit of a Life reveals a talented, vulnerable, and strong woman in all her wisecracking weirdness, and makes us love it--and her--too.

A Beautiful, Terrible Thing: A Memoir of Marriage and Betrayal


Jen Waite - 2017
    In a raw, first-person account, Waite recounts each heartbreaking discovery, every life-destroying lie, and reveals what happens once the dust finally settles on her demolished marriage.After a disturbing email sparks Waite's suspicion that her husband is having an affair, she tries to uncover the truth and rebuild trust in her marriage. Instead, she finds more lies, infidelity, and betrayal than she could have imagined. Waite obsessively analyzes her relationship, trying to find a single moment from the last five years that isn't part of the long-con of lies and manipulation. With a dual-timeline narrative structure, we see Waite's romance bud, bloom, and wither simultaneously, making the heartbreak and disbelief even more affecting.

Two Turns From Zero: Pushing to Higher Fitness Goals--Converting Them to Life Strength


Stacey Griffith - 2017
    Stacey firmly believes that every one of us can be an athlete. Focusing on four key concepts—Eat, Love, Train, and Repeat—this is her life handbook that provides a blueprint for feeling healthy, happy, and empowered. Stacey offers conditioning advice, nutrition counseling, visualizations for achieving your goals, and moving meditations for staying centered. Most important, she shows you how to locate your greatest sense of purpose that will take you to the highest levels of performance—and sustain you to weather life’s inevitable challenges.Two Turns from Zero is also Stacey's personal story—a chronicle of endurance that is as motivating as her workout routine. At one time, Stacey was directionless and, by her own account, an overall unsuccessful human being. But she finally realized she wanted more from life—she needed to find meaning. Giving up alcohol, drugs, and partying, she dedicated her life to fitness—a journey of discovery she uses in her book to motivate others to make the most of their own lives.This gifted instructor is beloved for her ability to inspire and push her students to achieve their ultimate center. In Two Turns from Zero, she shows how we can all achieve our personal peak.

Let Your Mind Run: A Memoir of Thinking My Way to Victory


Deena Kastor - 2018
    In Let Your Mind Run, the vaunted Olympic medalist and marathon and half-marathon record holder, will reveal how she incorporated the benefits of positive psychology into her already-dedicated running practice, setting her on a course to conquer women's distance running. Blending both narrative running insights and deep-dive brain science, this book will appeal to and motivate steadfast athletes, determined runners, and tough-as-nails coaches, and beyond. This memoir, written by perhaps the most famous American woman active in the competitive world of distance running, will appeal to the pragmatic athletic population, and jointly to fans of engaging sports narratives, inspirational memoirs, and uplifiting biographies.