Enjoy these hilarious stories about stupid criminals, their hilarious attempts at crime, and bizarre mistakes they made that prevented them from getting away with their crimes.

    They cannot skin a fish, dominate a battlefield, or transform majestic creatures of the Southern Hemisphere into piano keyboards.The Heming Way demonstrates how modern eunuchs—brainwashed by PETA and Alcoholics Anonymous—can learn from Papa's unparalleled example: drunken, unshaven, meat-devouring, wife-divorcing, and gloriously self-destructive.Advice includes:How to kill enough animals to render a species endangered—just like Papa!Getting your friends to think drinking a daiquiri is manly . . . just by drinking one nine yourselfAchieving sufficiently high testosterone levels to never have to worry about the chance of having a daughter instead of a sonAnd much more!Profane, insightful, hilarious and loaded with more than 150 photos, facts and insights about Papa, The Heming Way is a difficult path, and not for the weak, but truth is manlier than fiction.

    Description:- The Three-Body Problem 1967: Ye Wenjie witnesses Red Guards beat her father to death during China's Cultural Revolution. This singular event will shape not only the rest of her life but also the future of mankind. Four decades later, Beijing police ask nanotech engineer Wang Miao to infiltrate a secretive cabal of scientists after a spate of inexplicable suicides. Wang's investigation will lead him to a mysterious online game and immerse him in a virtual world ruled by the intractable and unpredicatable interaction of its three suns. The Dark Forest Crossing light years, they will reach Earth in four centuries' time. But the sophons, their extra-dimensional agents and saboteurs, are already here. Only the individual human mind remains immune to their influence. This is the motivation for the Wallfacer Project, a last-ditch defence that grants four individuals almost absolute power to design secret strategies, hidden through deceit and misdirection from human and alien alike. Three of the Wallfacers are influential statesmen and scientists, but the fourth is a total unknown. Death's End Half a century after the Doomsday Battle, the uneasy balance of Dark Forest Deterrence keeps the Trisolaran invaders at bay.Earth enjoys unprecedented prosperity due to the infusion of Trisolaran knowledge and, with human science advancing and the Trisolarans adopting Earth culture, it seems that the two civilizations can co-exist peacefully as equals without the terrible threat of mutually assured annihilation. But peace has made humanity complacent.

    Blondes, brunettes, beach balls and bikinis- now you can cherish the innocence of summer days gone by with this paperback edition collecting the earliest stories from the hard-to-find BETTY & VERONICA SUMMER FUN editions of the ARCHIE GIANT SERIES! Whether chasing after hunky new lifeguards, modeling the latest swimwear or putting up with Archie and Reggie's goofy rivalry for their affections, Betty and Veronica are truly the queens of summer!

    When a new client’s mission goes sideways, Joan finds herself caught in the middle of dueling gambits between the Star Empire and the Trade Federation. Recruited to perform the heist of a lifetime, the fate of the Star Empire rests in her hands. On the opposite side of the galaxy, Regency BioTech manager Dario Anazao sees an unsustainable situation brewing that promises a full-scale revolution. The megacorporations of the Trade Federation have kept the population in horrible working conditions, violating their human rights. With no one else to help, Dario must take it upon himself to rescue the workers of Mars. Can two heroes from warring factions come together to make a difference in the galaxy? Star Realms: Rescue Run is the first novelization of the critically acclaimed Star Realms spaceship combat deckbuilding game. You can check out the game here: http://www.starrealms.com. “I’ve long been a big fan of epic science fiction and space opera. I think Jon’s entry into this realm is an excellent and compelling read. Fans of the Star Realms deckbuilding game will appreciate this look into the Star Realms universe, with its fast-paced story and intriguing characters. From his strong female lead to her amusing AI, I think Star Realms fans and sci-fi fans in general will be eager for Jon to write a sequel.” —Darwin Kastle, Star Realms creator “Jon Del Arroz is a promising new writer with a knack for story and an interesting voice.” —Jody Lynn Nye, author of the Wolfe Pack series “This game-related novel is a lively, action-filled tale that should appeal to those who want a space adventure romp with intrigue and a touch of romance. A disgraced ex-military thief, the thief’s snide former shipmate, a special operative who isn’t that good with guns, and the resentful son of an arrogant corporate executive attempt an impossible mission... and there’s a humorously glitched portable AI in the mix, too, breaking into song at odd moments.” —Elizabeth Moon, author of the Paksenarrion novels

    They use plays that are outdated, they make the same mistakes over and over, and they leave heaps of money on the table. This book was written to help you STOP! making those same mistakes. STOP! making the same mistakes as your opponents. STOP! getting crushed in your game. STOP! leaving stacks of chips on the table.

    Once the dust settles, these four find themselves faced with an impossible choice: pretend to be adventurers undertaking a task of near-certain death or see their town and loved ones destroyed. Armed only with salvaged equipment, second-hand knowledge, and a secret that could get them killed, it will take all manner of miracles if they hope to pull off their charade.And even if they succeed, the deadliest part of their journey may well be what awaits them at its end.

    Farts: A Spotter's Guide will help you pinpoint he (or she) who dealt it every time. This hilarious book identifies the habitat, range, voice, and "field marks" of tencommon wind breakers, from the gentle hiss of the Silent-but-Deadly to the rip-roaring flatulation of the Seismic Blast. The attached battery powered fart machine reproduces each emanation in accurate sound. Grossly hip illustrations by the Fudge Factory'syes, you read that rightTravis Millard depict the offenders and offendees in brilliant detail. Printed on durable card stock, this is pure, unbridled entertainment for the giggling child in all of us. Let 'er rip!

    It's challenging--each hand presents a different set of conditions you must figure out and solve. It's very social--you play with a partner and two opponents. And best of all--it's fun. Bridge For Dummies, 2E gives you a step-by-step explanation of the fundamentals of the game in terms you can understand. It walks you through the different aspects of bridge, featuring real-life examples, so that you can feel comfortable with the basics before you ever start to play. And if you're already experienced at the game, you'll discover a wealth of tips and hints that can make you a better player. You'll learn all about:The basics of nontrump play How to play the hand in a trump contract Bidding for fun and profit Taking advantage of advanced bidding techniques Playing a strong defense and keeping score Playing bridge on your computer Playing in bridge clubs and tournaments Where to find other great bridge resources This newly revised edition features an expanded section on playing bridge online, with updated web addresses and other resources, along with new information on the latest bidding techniques. For anyone from novice to pro wanting to learn bridge or learn techniques to improve their game, Bridge For Dummies, 2E makes an ideal partner!

    

    Seeing an elderly woman crushed to death under a baby grand piano is not the best start to anyone’s day, and Max Dempsey’s is about to get a whole lot worse.When sacked bank manager turned bank robber Max Dempsey (aka Simon Golightly) finds himself deep in debt to dodgy undertaker Danny Bishop, he’s prepared to do almost anything to pay it off and keep all of his fingers.But he’s likely to lose a lot more than his fingers when he agrees to do a “little job” for Danny and unintentionally crosses psychopathic Greek gangster, Nikos Spiropoulos.Meanwhile, Bernard Pemberton and his granddaughter Tess are on a road trip to scatter their beloved Dottie’s ashes on a Scottish hilltop, but is it really her ashes in the cremation urn or something else altogether?Cremains is a crime caper that twists and turns its way towards a conclusion that even Max himself couldn’t have predicted.

    Jackie saw it all, and in The Joke Man: Bow to Stern he shares personal stories as well a look from behind the scenes at one of the highest-rated radio shows of all time. You’ll also get his take on his falling out with Howard and the show, and plenty of the raunchy, laugh-out–loud humor that Jackie “The Joke Man” is famous for. So sit back, relax, and enjoy as “The Joke Man” riffs on his one-of-a-kind career in show business, Howard Stern and the gang, and his very unique life—an American success story like no other.

    Frank Sinatra's mother was a convicted felon. Bugs Bunny was born in Brooklyn. The average American home contains $90 in loose change. It is illegal to use the American flag in advertising.And there's no good reason to also discover...Which game show host previously worked as a garbageman. Which day of week is the most popular to rob a bank. Which millionaire loaned his kidnapped grandson ransom money at 4 percent interest. Which country once had a dog for a king.

    Unlike other solutions, this solution is both easy to follow and is deliberately presented without reference to the colors on the faces of the cube. (Take a closer look, all cubes are not colored alike!) Try it with just a few hints or with the quick and complete, step-by-step solution which follows. Amaze your friends! master that infernal cube once and for all!

    It also displays the saga of continuous failures and lesson learns going forward.The Story takes us way back to 2006. Four college students in the final year had a big dream. Despite the average academic marks and knowledge, they dared to envisage big. Although everybody laughed at them for their big fantasies, they were firm in getting their dreams to come true. In the process of getting their dream fulfilled and opening a startup, they had to face a lot of hiccups. There was a lot of confusion among themselves. The troubles and disasters transpired in the way of getting their startups.The dreams, the vision, the ideas, the blunders, the lesson learned, some quick luck is Story's main gist.After each loss, the intensity from which they come back to start another project is the Story's highlight. The Story also revolves around the personal preferences, the ego, the emotional moments of their life.The Story also conveys the cautions that most of the youngster has forgotten nowadays in the rush of opening a startup.