And when Lady Peculiar’s butler – a part-time comedian – is found drowned in his own mango chutney, Detective Inspector Clinton Trump comes blundering onto the scene – ready to shun logic, breach protocol and trust in his own gut instincts. What will South East England’s greatest detective uncover? Is her ladyship a murderess? Was the killer a comedy rival? Or are darker forces at work in this particular corner of Brokenshire? Join our self-proclaimed British detective genius, as he races against time to solve this very funny murder mystery – so he can play golf at the weekend! The first novel in the ‘Clinton Trump Detective Genius’ series This riotous English detective spoof is murderously good fun from first page to last, as Inspector Trump and his unwanted sidekick, Constable Dinkel, encounter a procession of crazy comedy characters in the Great British countryside. Stuffed solid with British humour (or ‘humor’, if you’re one of the many American tourists who visit Upper Goosing), its mix of black comedy, British farce, funny one-liners and downright silliness is guaranteed to generate tremendous titters across the very civilised world.More amateur sleuth than professional investigator, Clinton Trump will bring a smile to your face like no other Trump has before, or probably ever will. So, jump aboard the Trump detection train, blow your Clinton trumpet and join the movement – Make Murder-Mystery Great Again! A Word from Detective Inspector Clinton Trump: “Greetings from Upper Goosing – the murder capital of Europe. You’ll find the scenery, tea rooms and cake shops are well worth the risk of a premature, grisly death. But before purchasing this novel, please note that it only employs British English, as spoken by Her Majesty the Queen. I don’t want anyone griping about me saying ‘per cent’ instead of ‘percent’, ‘metre’ instead of ‘meter’ or ‘tea’ instead of ‘coffee’. If you must grumble, please do as the English do and complain only to yourself. And if you’re planning on enjoying a cup of Earl Grey with this quality e-book, please remember: it’s tea first, milk second. Finally, don’t be afraid to laugh thunderously when reading this novel. Just don’t laugh yourself to death – we have enough fatalities around here as it is. Thank you.”

    Living in his motorhome, Walker is tasked with finding the daughter of the Mafia boss he befriended in Key West. She went missing while digging crystals in the mountains of Arkansas and to aid in his search, Walker reluctantly agrees to take along a mystery woman who supposedly has a psychic gift. She's smart, sexy, and single and the question is, does she have more on her quirky mind than finding the bosses daughter? Ride along as Walker, the mystery woman, and Mango Bob the cat travel cross country in Walker's motorhome, trying to avoid the trouble that seems to show up around every curve in the twisty mountain roads. A fun read!

    Loved it!"★★★ A clever mash of X-files, Tombstone, and Dresden Files! ★★★In 1885, President Grover Cleveland commissioned a special group of agents to investigate paranormal activities plaguing the nation. Unwilling to accept failure, he granted each the authority to operate outside the law. His directive was simple. No rules. No excuses. Just get it done.Remy Kincaid and his cynical steed, Fable, head to the town of Wharton, Texas, to investigate the disappearance of several young children. As clues lead them from a decrepit old house to an abandoned silver mine, they soon learn that an ancient evil is trying to release itself upon the world.★★★ If you enjoyed The Survivalist Series, you'll love The Watchman! ★★★

    My Man Jeeves 1919Right Ho, Jeeves 1922Death At The Excelsior, Others 1914

    After abandoning his new home as a lost cause, he's caught up in the poker craze and moves to Atlantic City with a new dream of "playing poker for a living", but soon finds himself stuck in a dizzying spell of bad luck at the card tables. Or maybe he just sucks at poker, like everybody else. His money all gone, and finding that it's actually difficult to drink oneself to death at 1am, he's suddenly offered a chance to make his money back, and then some, by running an underground poker game in New York City. Once in New York, Tim finds himself on the road to recovery and making real money for the first time—but at what cost? We Run Bad offers an authentic and darkly comic look at underground poker culture, while serving up an indictment of post-recession America. Here, every game is rigged, and the only way to come out ahead is to be the one doing the rigging.

    Until it arrives. From the desk of Honor Raconteur comes the tale of one guild, who believes in the impossible, and fight with everything they have to prevent the war they see coming. ~ Contains all three books in the trilogy "Deepwoods," "Blackstone," and "Fallen Ward," as well as "Origins," the collection of short stories.

    An apocalyptic storm. Whispering voices in the air. She was right to fear the worst-case scenario. Amy Burnett has been buried in her work as a security expert. She likes it that way—her dark past can’t invade her thoughts as long as she stays holed up in her office. So why the heck has she ended up at a gothic mansion’s doorstep in the middle of the night? It’s because Craig Foster summoned her there. Amy’s company built the sealed chamber in his basement, for any worrisome worst-case scenario, but now the safe room has presented a scenario of its own: Craig’s daughter is trapped inside. It should be a quick fix. After all, what’s the worst thing that can happen when a stranger arrives at a remote mansion on a stormy night? An impossible mystery? A haunting? A visit from the lurking strangers in the woods? Surely not all three—that would require extraordinarily bad luck. Unfortunately, Amy’s been short on luck lately. Three Incidents at Foster Manor will keep you guessing until the end with a twist-filled, fast-paced, genre-blending mix of mystery, ghost story, thriller, and cosmic horror that will chill you to the core. This is a standalone story, but also acts as a sequel to P.T. Phronk's previous mystery, The Arborist. "Full of interesting characters, twists and scares, it will keep you off-balance all the way to the end!" —Franny "I'm always down some ghostly fun but then the fun dial twisted and wow." —Amazon Reviewer "If you like reading stories somewhat reminiscent of The Twilight Zone this is for you." —Alanna Patterson

    The estate is in disrepair, but one couple is determined to restore the estate to its former glory. But when strange accidents begin to become more dangerous, putting their crew’s lives at risk, the fixer-upper couple realize they might have bitten off more than they could chew.The Haunting of Calhoun MansionThree murders. One night. No convictions.Nicole Harper, a hospice nurse with a floundering marriage, is assigned a new patient in the remote Northwestern wilderness. But when Nic meets her new patient, she discovers the old woman's family history is as troubling as her medical condition.The Haunting of the Holloway FamilyA job opportunity has brought the Holloway family to a small desert town on the Arizona/California border in the middle of nowhere. But what is thought as a godsend soon devolves into a parent’s worst nightmare.

    The numbness, the disbelief in what had happened and the fear of what would come next ensured that her every thought was tinged with doubt. Hoping for a fresh start, she’s packed up, said her goodbyes and moved to the small town of Snow Ridge, New Hampshire. Settling down in an old, renovated farmhouse, she plans to focus on the simple things in life. And, in time, she is determined to get back to some semblance of normalcy. But, apparently, that is not going to happen any time soon… The young girl at the local bookstore Bonnie frequents has been murdered. She was one of the few with whom Bonnie has become friendly during her short time in town. And whether it’s her mysterious past, her reserved nature or simply the relative ease in pinning the blame on the outsider, the police have Bonnie at the top of their list of suspects. Now, if she wishes to avoid a prison sentence for a crime she didn’t commit, it appears as if Bonnie is going to have to prove her own innocence. In doing so, she’ll uncover a crooked politician, unveil a hidden monster and unearth a web of secrets & lies that certain residents of the town have spent their lives concealing. And, with a little luck, she may just survive long enough to clear her good name. Book 2: Just when Bonnie Mayberry thought her new life in Snow Ridge was getting back to normal after a horrific case involving a deadly, old man bent on revenge, she is pulled into a second case that wraps her in a web of lies, deceit and...murder! At first, the man’s murder seems straightforward enough. That is, until an influential politician arrives in town demanding that the wife of the dead man be turned over to her for prosecution. But Bonnie soon finds out that this powerful woman is not exactly who she seems to be… In fact, she may not only be the killer, but she just may be planning to take over the world! Book 3: When Bonnie agrees to help locate a missing girl, Bonnie leaves her hometown of Snow Ridge, New Hampshire and hits the road on a mission to track her down. But when false leads and countless mishaps have her traveling up & down the East Coast and mingling with a cast of characters ranging from the Amish to the FBI, she begins to doubt her chances at success. That is, until she finds the girl on a dark & stormy night. And that’s when things really start to get messy… Book 4: After traveling up and down the East Coast in search of a missing girl, Bonnie Mayberry couldn’t be happier to return to normal, everyday life. But, as one case closes, another opens… It begins when a bounty hunter arrives in town just as a heavy fog begins to descend upon Snow Ridge. His tale of a murderous clown, a maniacal banker and a promise to a dying woman seems to be as murky as the misty air. But, as always, Bonnie is determined to help solve the mystery and, despite the danger from thickening fog, she soon finds herself on the road once again.

    Standing, and straddling my broken body with a well-muscled leg on either side of me, she looked like an ethereal giant: a beautiful Amazon, impossible tall, and equally invincible. She fired immediately, spun quickly and fired again, then dropped down and crowded me against the antique safe that had become our sanctuary. Improbably, she grinned at me. "Two down, and one to go."A mass shooting, an FBI coverup, and a madman with his own militia and a political hit list. Adam Cain is caught in the middle with only one person to trust; the beautiful and mysterious woman that calls herself the Gypsy. She seems to have all the answers, and a hit list of her own.

    1965.  War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...  What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series: ★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."

    He may look like your regular ginger flabby tabby, but unlike most tabbies, he can actually communicate with his human, reporter for the Hampton Cove Gazette Odelia Poole. Max takes a keen interest in the goings-on in their small town, by snooping around with his best friends Dooley, a not-too-bright ragamuffin, and Harriet, a gorgeous white Persian. Their regular visits to the police station, the barbershop and the doctor’s office provide them with those precious and exclusive scoops that have made Odelia the number one reporter in town. Purrfect Murder When the body of a bestselling writer is discovered buried in the last Long Island outhouse, and a new policeman arrives in town to solve the murder, it looks like things are about to change in Hampton Cove. Detective Chase Kingsley doesn’t take kindly to nosy reporters like Odelia snooping around his crime scene or interviewing his suspects. And to make matters worse, he’s got a cat of his own in Brutus, a buff, black bully, who, just like his owner, likes to lay down the law. Soon Brutus isn’t just restricting access to the police station, but he’s putting the moves on Harriet, breaking up the band.

 Now it’s all Odelia, Max and Dooley can do to try and solve the murder, in spite of Detective Kingsley’s and Brutus’s protestations, and show the overbearing cop and his bullyragging feline how things are done in Hampton Cove. Purrfectly Deadly When famous eighties pop star John Paul George is found floating facedown in his pool, Hampton Cove’s premier sleuthing tabby Max and his feline friends are on the case. Soon they’re chasing leads and following clues, helping their human Odelia Poole, reporter for the Hampton Cove Gazette, solve the murder.

 Meanwhile, new cop in town Chase Kingsley has his own problems to deal with. An old scandal threatens to get him kicked off the force. And even though Odelia and Chase don’t always see eye to eye, she decides to help him clear his name, even if it means keeping Chase’s cat Brutus, Max’s self-declared nemesis, in town.

 Soon Max is up to his whiskers in drug dealers, boy toys, disgruntled ex-wives and even more drug dealers, all while competing with Brutus for the title of Hampton Cove’s one and only ‘true detective.’ Purrfect Revenge Blorange tabby Max and ragamuffin Dooley are on the case again. This time a world-famous reality star has been found murdered in her own bed, and it looks like the crime just might be terror-related. The Kenspeckles, stars of the well-known reality show Keeping Up with the Kenspeckles, are in town to film a new season of their show, so the case soon turns into a complete media circus, with the Kenspeckles insisting the entire investigation is filmed for their show.

 Odelia Poole, Hampton Cove’s premier reporter, teams up with Detective Chase Kingsley to catch the killer, but with cameras filming their every move, and every Kenspeckle a suspect, they’re not making a lot of progress. Good thing Odelia’s cats Max and Dooley can sneak around undetected, tracking leads and hunting clues. But first they have to pacify Shana’s French Bulldog Kane, who just might be in possession of the clue that breaks the case. And they have to outsmart Chase’s black tabby Brutus, who has his own reasons to find the killer.

    Rarely are self-certified wasters called to the battle between good and evil. It’s the job of Jack Connolly, failed television celebrity turned religious messiah to convince Joseph otherwise. As the past, present and future converge, an important question becomes paramount: Is the oncoming apocalypse even real? Add in a new girlfriend who thinks Joseph is someone else entirely and a housemate with an unhealthy Roger Moore obsession and it all starts to get a bit tricky.

    A friend in need. A dangerous investigation. And cake. If this is your kind of cozy mystery series then you'll love this boxed set. This collection features all seven books in the Mysteries of Treasure Cove series: 1. Murder and Chocolate Fudge Cake 2. Murder and Layer Cake 3. Murder and Chocolate Cake 4. Murder and Citrus Cream Cake 5. Murder and Cherry Cake 6. Murder and Vanilla Cake 7. Chocolate Cupcakes with a Side of Murder Special Note: Chocolate Cupcakes with a Side of Murder is exclusively available in this set. Don't miss out on Sabrina Carlson's latest adventure. Buy your copy right now! Mysteries of Treasure Cove Series Blurb: One of Sabrina Carlson's oldest friend's is found murdered. Unfortunately, she doesn't have time to grieve. After all, the killer is out there somewhere. And she isn't about to let them get away. Instead, Sabrina is going to do everything in her power to bring the guilty party to justice. Even if it means risking her life. But is she really prepared to discover the truth? Or will this investigation break her?

     Sam believes she will soon have to adjust from the slow-paced, farm life of East Arkansas to follow her track scholarship to the University of Arkansas. Her life now is laid-back and predictable just the way she wants it. However, that will soon change as she goes for a morning run down a familiar, rural road and stops for a brief rest at an old, abandoned farm. There at that lonely, isolated place, so peaceful, so familiar, Sam has an experience that will change the course of her life. What will she do and where will she turn as she discovers she is not who or what she thought and this world is not the only one? Are they even her choices to make when a strange, dimension portal proves time travel and other worlds are real? Return from the Portal is the sequel to the time travel novel Portal to the Forgotten. In that story Luke, a reclusive Arkansas Constable, while searching for a missing girl, discovers a time travel portal in the Ozark Mountains that opens to another dimension. He and a reporter are pulled into that world and find it is almost impossible to get back. Return from the Portal is a stand alone novel, but would be better enjoyed by first reading Portal to the Forgotten. Visit John Gschwend at Johngschwend.com to see more of his stories.