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Joke Book by David Lewman
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Autocorrect FAILS! Text Messaging Autocorrect Gone Horribly Wrong
THE CLOWN FACTORY - 2013
This book was brought to you by the one and only - THE CLOWN FACTORY.
Boogers for Lunch: A Sight Word Book (Billy Bad)
Billy Bad - 2014
It may be gross, but kids love this stuff, and that's the point! I originally wrote this book for my son, a first grader, who was struggling with sight words and reading speed. The sight word books, decodable word books, early reader books, and flash cards they offered him at school were boring, which made it a challenge to get him excited about reading. So I decided to write a series of children's books using sight words but with stories about the things I heard him and his friends laughing about. It worked! My son was able to read my Billy Bad sight word stories with speed and confidence. And because he was laughing I knew his reading comprehension was improving. This book is written using mostly Dolch sight words and a few other words that are easily decodable. Unlike most sight word books and decodable word books, Billy Bad's sight word books have stories that will capture the attention of early readers and make them laugh. When kids enjoy the stories they read they fall in love with reading. I hope your child enjoys these silly (and gross) sight word books as much as my son does.
The Ultimate Bathroom Reader: Interesting Stories, Fun Facts and Just Crazy Weird Stuff to Keep You Entertained on the Crapper! (Perfect Gag Gift)
Bill O'Neill - 2021
Game on Boys 2: Minecraft Madness: A hilarious action adventure for children 9-12 with cartoons. (Game on Boys Series)
Kate Cullen - 2015
Rino James is the thinking boy’s Greg Heffley (aka wimpy kid). He’s fanatical with all things computer. He’s mad about Minecraft, he’s crazy over Xbox, and he’s obsessed with the PlayStation. There’s only one thing in this whole world that could make his life better (apart from sending his annoying sister back to the baby making farm), and it has nothing to do with computer games. As usual, his parents do their best to prevent it from happening. According to Rino, their idea of fun, doesn't quite match his idea of fun. In fact, he believes his Mom has a built in Siri message centre to alert her when he is having a good time, so she can detonate disaster for him. In the second of the series, what starts off as an awesome week with plenty of gaming promise, soon turns sour when a new teacher, obsessed with running, replaces Mr Higginbottom, and an All-night Gaming Marathon at Matthew’s, is replaced with a family trip that makes the Wimpy kids ‘long haul’ look like a limo ride to Disneyland. What happens at the end is nothing short of devastating and miraculous all in one. The main question is ‘does Rino live to tell the tale?’ Girls will love this book just as much as boys, despite its name. Be prepared for lots of side splitting laughter, but don’t be surprised if you shed the odd tear as well. Don’t forget, the first in the series, ‘Game on Boys: The PlayStation Playoffs’ is still free with 93%- 5 star reviews. Get it here http://amzn.com/B00K3W0KNM
Ultimate: The Greatest Sport Ever Invented by Man
Pasquale Anthony Leonardo - 2007
Most people think it’s Frisbee football played barefoot and without boundaries. Those people are wrong. Ultimate is a sport played by 824,000 people a year in North America—more than korfball, lawn darts, lacrosse, and curling combined. Ultimate is so popular that it even has rules that are sometimes followed.This book will provide you with complete and total knowledge of the Ultimate game.THIS BOOK INCLUDES:-- The Eight Ultimate Player Types-- The 42 Most Common Nicknames-- 28 Near-Useless Throws on the Field-- How to Name Your Ultimate Team-- Where to Play Ultimate Without Being Mocked-- How to Score at an Ultimate Party-- Useful Playing Tips from Experts of the Game PLUS: HOW TO PLAY ULTIMATE IN EIGHT EASY STEPS – AN ILLUSTRATED GUIDE -- Can I play Ultimate with a mustache?-- Where do Ultimate babies come from?-- How can I become an Ultimate champion without practicing?-- What is “throwing Fire”?-- How can I survive a shark attack? About the author:Pasquale Anthony Leonardo IV has covered numerous championship Ultimate tournaments since 1997 and was the Media Director for the 2006 World Junior Ultimate Championships. In 2005 he co-wrote Ultimate: The First Four Decades, which was reviewed in Sports Illustrated and featured on ESPN’s live talk show "Cold Pizza." He also writes screenplays. He lives in Brooklyn, New York and/or somewhere out West.
Rich Man Poor Man
Adam Carolla - 2012
Combining Adam's inimitable comedic voice and four-color illustrations by his friend Michael Narren, Rich Man Poor Man is a hilariously accurate look at what the people born with silver spoons in their mouths have in common with the people whose only utensils are plastic sporks stolen from a Shakey's.
101+ Knock Knock Jokes for Kids)
Arnie Lightning - 2014
Kids love jokes! Jokes can aid in story-telling, create laughs, and help with conversation and social skills. Your child will love this hilarious joke book full of clean knock knock jokes for children. Kindle Unlimited and Amazon Prime Members can read this book for FREE! Kids and children can practice their reading and joke telling skills with these funny knock knock jokes. With silly jokes and hilarious laughs, beginning and early readers can enjoy hours of fun and entertainment.
This book is especially great for traveling, waiting rooms, and reading aloud at home.
101+ funny knock knock jokes
Excellent for early and beginning readers
Hours of fun and entertainment for your child
Great for long trips, waiting rooms, and reading aloud
Funny jokes from this book... Knock knock!Who’s there?Icy!Icy who?Icy you! Open this door!
HAHA!
Knock knock!Who’s there?Alfred!Alfred who?Alfred the dark! Open the door!
LOL!
Knock knock!Who’s there?Juno!Juno who?Juno how long I’ve been waiting out here?
HAHA!
Knock knock!Who’s there?Athena!Athena who?Athena funny movie the other day!
LOL!
Funny Knock Knock Jokes for Kids! (Clean Jokes for Children) This funny joke book is full of hilarious knock knock jokes that will have you laughing for hours! This is one of the best joke collections in the world. These jokes about food will give you a case of the giggles. These funny jokes are excellent for kids, children, teens, and adults. Early and beginner readers can practice reading aloud and learning. Best-Selling Children's Book Author, Arnie Lightning Arnie Lightning is a best-selling children's book author with a straightforward goal. He wants his work to create a positive impact in the lives of others through children's books. Learning morals, lessons, and good character can start at a young age. Arnie's books reflect this. By providing a comfortable and entertaining environment, learning can be a fun activity! Scroll up and click 'buy' to get these funny jokes!
100% Money Back Guarantee
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Kick the Bucket
Alex A. King - 2020
In the space of a single horrendous day, Merry’s boss kicks her out to pasture, her husband ditches her for a barely legal floozy, and she decides to end it all. (But she doesn’t have cancer, no matter what her doctor says, so at least she’s got that going for her.)Determined to hurl herself into an early grave, Merry flies home to Greece for one last hurrah. But Greece has other plans for Merry, and before long she enthusiastically decides to give living one more shot.Too bad she no longer has any say in the matter.
BIG HAIR AND FLYING COWS
Dolores Wilson - 2014
To say the least. She calls Sweet Meadow, Georgia, home, where she works for her father doing auto repairs. She also drives the tow-truck, although Sweet Meadow's rather colorful denizens tend to treat Bertie more like the local, free taxi service. You know, someone has to get to a doctor's appointment or pick something up at the dry cleaners. Bertie's favorite day of the week is Friday, when she leaves the wrecker with her father for the whole weekend and joins her friends at the Dew Drop Inn for a night of dancing. Her best friend, Mary Lou, sometimes fixes her up with dubious dates, although Bertie has to remind her friend not to tease her hair too high for those occasions. Like the time when they went to Carrie Sue's open house, and a ceramic cow with angel wings hanging from a ceiling fan locked its hooves into Bertie's big hair and refused to let go. She had to wear it all night, dangling chain and all. Bertie's nearly perfect life is about to take a downhill turn, however. It starts when her landlord, Pete, currently a resident in a nearby nursing home, starts showing up at her house. In his birthday suit. A very badly wrinkled birthday suit. And then she goes to her mailbox, a rubber large mouth bass, and finds a notice from the zoning commission saying she can no longer park the wrecker in her driveway. The notice is signed by George Bigham. But when she goes to the courthouse to take care of her little problem, it is only to discover George Bigham is deceased. And Mary Lou's pregnancy test just came up positive. Can it get any worse? In a word... yes.
Who I Am and What I Want
David Shrigley - 2003
In this mock autobiographical collection his mischievous drawings capture life's anxieties and ambitions from the mundane to the surreal. Here, at last, is The Truth about beer, doctors, shadow puppets, lunch, dolphins, boredom, and supernatural forces. Seductively strange and addictively amusing, this edgy little book welcomes the uninitiated and rewards the faithful.
Driven to Distraction
Stuart Bone - 2016
Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).
The Ducks In The Bathroom Are Not Mine: A decade of procrastination 2007 - 2017
David Thorne - 2017
Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.
Diary of Indignities
Patrick Hughes - 2007
With full-color photo essays, the author guides readers past good taste, sense and even logic into the magical, mayhem-ridden world known as his life.
Epic Text Fails! The Funniest Autocorrects, Wrong Numbers, and Smartphone Mishaps
Marcus Rainey - 2013
Smart phones can make us look really dumb! Get this e-book and laugh your #@% off at what happens when you don't double-check before you hit send! Please Note: Some profanity, not for children!
Works by David Sedaris: Naked, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim
Books LLC - 2010
Purchase includes a free trial membership in the publisher's book club where you can select from more than a million books without charge. Chapters: Naked, When You Are Engulfed in Flames, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, Holidays on Ice, Santaland Diaries, Barrel Fever. Source: Wikipedia. Free updates online. Not illustrated. Excerpt: Naked, published in 1997, is a collection of essays by American humorist David Sedaris. The book details Sedaris life, from his unusual upbringing in the suburbs of Raleigh, North Carolina, to his booze-and-drug-ridden college years, to his Kerouacian wandering as a young adult. The book became a best-seller and was acclaimed for its wit, dark humor and irreverent tackling of tragic events, including the death of Sedaris mother. Prior to publication, several of the essays were read by the author on the NPR program This American Life. About the early life of the Sedaris family, and David's hopes to one day be rich and famous. It is revealed that the family is actually middle class. A description of Sedaris' obsessive-compulsive and Tourettic tendencies as a child. His behavior quirks include licking light switches and kissing newspapers, and they frequently land him in trouble at school. These tendencies are abandoned when he begins smoking at college. An account of Sedaris' elderly (and slightly senile) grandmother, known as Ya-Ya. After suffering an injury she is forced to live with his family, resulting in tension for all. Eventually, at the urging of Sedaris' mom (who was against Ya-Ya moving in with the family in the first place), she is put into a low-grade nursing home. When she dies, only his father seems to mourn. A description of events regarding a pornographic book that Sedaris finds when he is a child. The book is passed between his siblings, and eventually confiscated by his mother, who in turn reads it. A description of...More: http: //booksllc.net/?id=89168