Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter
Scott Adams - 2017
Scott Adams--a trained hypnotist and a lifelong student of persuasion--was one of the earliest public figures to predict Trump's win, doing so a week after Nate Silver put Trump's odds at 2 percent in his FiveThirtyEight.com blog. The mainstream media regarded Trump as a novelty and a sideshow. But Adams recognized in Trump a level of persuasion you only see once in a generation.Trump triggered massive cognitive dissonance and confirmation bias on both the left and the right. We're hardwired to respond to emotion, not reason. We might listen to 10 percent of a speech--a hand gesture here, a phrase there--and if the right buttons are pushed, we irrationally agree with the speaker and invent reasons to justify that decision after the fact.The point isn't whether Trump was right or wrong, good or bad. Win Bigly goes beyond politics to look at persuasion tools that can work in any setting--the same ones Adams saw in Steve Jobs when he invested in Apple decades ago. For instance:- If you need to convince people that something is important, make a claim that's directionally accurate but has a big exaggeration in it. Everyone will spend endless hours talking about how wrong it is while accidentally persuading themselves the issue is a high priority. - Stop wasting time on elaborate presentations. Inside, you'll learn which components of your messaging matter, and where you can wing it. - Creating "linguistic kill shots" with persuasion engineering (such as "Low-energy Jeb") can be more powerful than facts and policies.Adams offers nothing less than "access to the admin passwords to human beings." This is a must-read if you care about persuading others in any field--or if you just want to resist persuasion from others.
Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In
Roger Fisher - 1981
One of the primary business texts of the modern era, it is based on the work of the Harvard Negotiation Project, a group that deals with all levels of negotiation and conflict resolution. Getting to Yes offers a proven, step-by-step strategy for coming to mutually acceptable agreements in every sort of conflict. Thoroughly updated and revised, it offers readers a straight- forward, universally applicable method for negotiating personal and professional disputes without getting angry-or getting taken.This is by far the best thing I`ve ever read about negotiation. It is equally relevant for the individual who would like to keep his friends, property, and income and the statesman who would like to keep the peace." --John Kenneth Galbraith"
Yes!: 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive
Noah J. Goldstein - 2008
But what makes people say yes to our requests? Persuasion is not only an art, it is also a science, and researchers who study it have uncovered a series of hidden rules for moving people in your direction. Based on more than sixty years of research into the psychology of persuasion, Yes! reveals fifty simple but remarkably effective strategies that will make you much more persuasive at work and in your personal life, too.Cowritten by the world's most quoted expert on influence, Professor Robert Cialdini, Yes! presents dozens of surprising discoveries from the science of persuasion in short, enjoyable, and insightful chapters that you can apply immediately to become a more effective persuader. Why did a sign pointing out the problem of vandalism in the Petrified Forest National Park actually increase the theft of pieces of petrified wood? Why did sales of jam multiply tenfold when consumers were offered many fewer flavors? Why did people prefer a Mercedes immediately after giving reasons why they prefer a BMW? What simple message on cards left in hotel rooms greatly increased the number of people who behaved in environmentally friendly ways?Often counterintuitive, the findings presented in Yes! will steer you away from common pitfalls while empowering you with little-known but proven wisdom.Whether you are in advertising, marketing, management, or sales, or just curious about how to be more influential in everyday life, Yes! shows how making small, scientifically proven changes to your approach can have a dramatic effect on your persuasive powers.
The Catalyst: How to Change Anyone's Mind
Jonah Berger - 2020
Marketers want to change their customers’ minds and leaders want to change organizations. Start-ups want to change industries and nonprofits want to change the world. But change is hard. Often, we persuade and pressure and push, but nothing moves. Could there be a better way?This book takes a different approach. Successful change agents know it’s not about pushing harder, or providing more information, it’s about being a catalyst. Catalysts remove roadblocks and reduce the barriers to change. Instead of asking, “How could I change someone’s mind?” they ask a different question: “Why haven’t they changed already? What’s stopping them?”The Catalyst identifies the key barriers to change and how to mitigate them. You’ll learn how catalysts change minds in the toughest of situations: how hostage negotiators get people to come out with their hands up and how marketers get new products to catch on, how leaders transform organizational culture and how activists ignite social movements, how substance abuse counselors get addicts to realize they have a problem, and how political canvassers change deeply rooted political beliefs.This book is designed for anyone who wants to catalyze change. It provides a powerful way of thinking and a range of techniques that can lead to extraordinary results. Whether you’re trying to change one person, transform an organization, or shift the way an entire industry does business, this book will teach you how to become a catalyst.
The Quick and Easy Way to Effective Speaking
Dale Carnegie - 1962
Now streamlined and updated, the book that has literally put millions on the highway to greater accomplishment and success can show you how to have maximum impact as a speaker--every day, and in every situation that demands winning others over to your point of view.
The Influential Mind: What the Brain Reveals About Our Power to Change Others
Tali Sharot - 2017
We all have a duty to affect others—from the classroom to the boardroom to social media. But how skilled are we at this role, and can we become better? It turns out that many of our instincts—from relying on facts and figures to shape opinions, to insisting others are wrong or attempting to exert control—are ineffective, because they are incompatible with how people’s minds operate. Sharot shows us how to avoid these pitfalls, and how an attempt to change beliefs and actions is successful when it is well-matched with the core elements that govern the human brain. Sharot reveals the critical role of emotion in influence, the weakness of data and the power of curiosity. Relying on the latest research in neuroscience, behavioral economics and psychology, the book provides fascinating insight into the complex power of influence, good and bad.
No More Mr. Nice Guy
Robert A. Glover - 2000
Nice Guy! landed its author, a certified marriage and family therapist, on The O'Reilly Factor and the Rush Limbaugh radio show. Dr. Robert Glover has dubbed the "Nice Guy Syndrome" trying too hard to please others while neglecting one's own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness. It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.
The Art of Conversation: Change Your Life with Confident Communication
Judy Apps - 2014
Why is it some of us are stuck for words, but others blabber or can't stop? What is it that some people have naturally which enables them to converse comfortably and easily, to engage people and build better relationships?"The Art of Conversation "will show you step by step how to converse skillfully and enjoyably with other people, at home, at work, on the phone and in the street- even if you're daunted now, discover the difference good conversation can make in every aspect of your life. Learn to:-Overcome the most common block to good conversation- fear; find out how to break the silence and keep the conversation going- Understand the different types of conversation and how they work- which topics and language are suitable for the occasion- Learn simple methods for being heard and understood, including speaking clearly and audibly, listening well and using non-verbal communication- Find out how to hold a conversation in tricky situations, including how to disagree, how to speak to those in authority and people you find difficult-Use conversation to form relationships, improve friendships, make the sale, chat people up, to learn, influence and persuade.TABLE OF CONTENTSINTRO 1. INTRODUCING CONVERSATION1. Normal and everyday2. The key to many doors3. What this book is and isn't1. THE DANCE OF CONVERSATION1. The dance of conversation2. A subtle human art3. The traditional 'conversationalist'4. What's conversation for?2. CONNECTING IS WHAT MATTERS MOST1. Conversational DrainsEnthuso-boreRobo-choreEcho-boreThe Ego-boreQueen of GossipMoaning Micky and Minnie2. Finding common groundFavourite objects of attention3. Non-verbal connectionBody languageVoice tone4. Energetic connection5. FlexibilityDealing with 'drains'3. GETTING IN THE RIGHT STATE1. Looking at lack of ease2. Managing your state3. Breathe4. Move5. Collecting positive states6. Staying present and aware7. Focusing outside yourself8. Dealing with silence9. Curiosity10. Trusting yourself and others4. GETTING A CONVERSATION GOING - THE BASICS1. Breaking the silence2. Make a comment3. Float in a simple question4. Try a comment followed by a question5. Introduce yourself positively6. Keeping the Conversation Going7. Adding a little extra8. Taking it gently9. Open questions10. Stories11. Dropping conversational clues - and picking them up5. LISTENING1. How well do you listen1. What can happen instead of listening2. Rehearsing your own piece3. Daydreaming4. Pretending to listen5. Non-listening6. Filtering the communication7. Judgement8. Playing the psychiatrist9. Reassuring or diverting2. How to listen well3. Show that you're listening4. Freeing yourself to listen5. Deep listening PART 2: THE POWER OF CONVERSATION6. INFLUENCING A CONVERSATION1. Know your intention2. Leading through connection3. Creating movement4. Influence can be as gentle as a story7. DIFFERENT KINDS OF CONVERSATION1. Thing Talk2. Action talkThe art of small talk3. Head TalkExchange of ideasExchange of opinionsWit4. Heart TalkEmotional supportIntimate conversationRisk taking5. Transparent/Inward/Intimate TalkPresence in Aikido6. Generative Talk/Soul Talk7. Progressing through talk-types8. EXPRESSING YOURSELF1. Expressing you - voiceBe understood Speak with flow Getting rid of useless fillers Expressing interest and sounding interesting2. Expressing you - body language3. Expressing you - your emotionsInfluencing with your emotions4. Expressing the real you5. Dancing with languageFinding a common language Playtime with language Negative language Language Habits Big effect of small words Language of Influence? PART 3: CONVERSATION IN PRACTICE9. SAILING THROUGH TRICKY WATERS1. What to do if you're stuckStop faking it Slowing down Be careful what you ask Know which "rules" you're playing Being flexibile2. Oiling the wheelsComment on what you've already heard Offer a prompt Encouraging nods and grunts3. Spotting the Games People PlayThe status game The manipulation game Role playing Naming the game4. Enjoying disagreement5. ConfrontationsHandling feelings with skill Checking your assumptions Assertive method/Taking the initiative/What to say10. CONVERSATIONS IN A PROFESSIONAL CONTEXT1. Conversations in the workplaceRole playing Small talk at work Negative small talk Meetings, Jousts and Debates Facilitating Group Conversations skilfully/Meaningful conversationsConversational style - Coaching style rather than control/command2. NetworkingBeing the best of you - as written at beg. Of chapter. - Clear/honest Giving and taking Probing questions Abundance Error! Bookmark notdefined.Avoiding the networking nerd - and avoiding being one! Seizing the day Moving on3. Job InterviewsCreating a conversation Busting the men/women myths4. Conversations in the mediaStage-crafted conversations /Most media interviews pre-plannedDesire for black/white Confrontations Media chat If you want something fresh and new, you need time Time factors - no time for conversation to grow Fine media interviews that are conversations Genuine interactions Conversational style solos5. Conversations to create personal changeKey Points Coaching and counselling conversations Building advanced questioning skills Using deep listening skills Bus-stop break-throughs PART 4: CONVERSATIONS CHANGING THE WORLD/ BIG CONVERSATIONS1. Conversations to Change the WorldNegotiation High level conversations2. &am
In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People
George K. Simon Jr. - 1996
"This book clearly illustrates the true nature of disturbed characters, exposes the tactics the most manipulative characters use to pull the wool over the eyes of others, and outlines powerful, practical ways to deal more effectively with manipulative people."
Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion
George J. Thompson - 1993
Listen and speak more effectively, engage people through empathy (the most powerful word in the English language), avoid the most common conversational disasters, and use proven strategies that allow you to successfully communicate your point of view and take the upper hand in most disputes.
Finding Flow: The Psychology of Engagement with Everyday Life
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi - 1995
What makes a good life? Is it money? An important job? Leisure time? Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi believes our obsessive focus on such measures has led us astray. Work fills our days with anxiety and pressure, so that during our free time, we tend to live in boredom, watching TV or absorbed by our phones.What are we missing? To answer this question, Csikszentmihalyi studied thousands of people, and he found the key. People are happiest when they challenge themselves with tasks that demand a high degree of skill and commitment, and which are undertaken for their own sake. Instead of watching television, play the piano. Take a routine chore and figure out how to do it better, faster, more efficiently. In short, learn the hidden power of complete engagement, a psychological state the author calls flow. Though they appear simple, the lessons in Finding Flow are life-changing.
Give and Take: A Revolutionary Approach to Success
Adam M. Grant - 2013
But today, success is increasingly dependent on how we interact with others. It turns out that at work, most people operate as either takers, matchers, or givers. Whereas takers strive to get as much as possible from others and matchers aim to trade evenly, givers are the rare breed of people who contribute to others without expecting anything in return. Using his own pioneering research as Wharton's youngest tenured professor, Grant shows that these styles have a surprising impact on success. Although some givers get exploited and burn out, the rest achieve extraordinary results across a wide range of industries. Combining cutting-edge evidence with captivating stories, this landmark book shows how one of America's best networkers developed his connections, why the creative genius behind one of the most popular shows in television history toiled for years in anonymity, how a basketball executive responsible for multiple draft busts transformed his franchise into a winner, and how we could have anticipated Enron's demise four years before the company collapsed - without ever looking at a single number. Praised by bestselling authors such as Dan Pink, Tony Hsieh, Dan Ariely, Susan Cain, Dan Gilbert, Gretchen Rubin, Bob Sutton, David Allen, Robert Cialdini, and Seth Godin-as well as senior leaders from Google, McKinsey, Merck, Estee Lauder, Nike, and NASA - Give and Take highlights what effective networking, collaboration, influence, negotiation, and leadership skills have in common. This landmark book opens up an approach to success that has the power to transform not just individuals and groups, but entire organizations and communities.
Goals!: How to Get Everything You Want Faster Than You Ever Thought Possible
Brian Tracy - 1989
Author Brian Tracy explains the seven key elements of goal setting and the 12 steps necessary to set and accomplish goals of any size. Using simple language and real-life examples, Tracy shows how to do the crucial work of determining one's strengths, values, and true goals. He explains how to build the self-esteem and confidence necessary for achievement; how to overpower every problem or obstacle; how to overcome difficulties; how to respond to challenges; and how to continue moving forward no matter what happens. The book's "Mental Fitness" program of character development shows readers how to become the kind of person on the inside who can achieve any goal on the outside.
Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World
Cal Newport - 2016
If you master this skill, you'll achieve extraordinary results.Deep work is the ability to focus without distraction on a cognitively demanding task. It's a skill that allows you to quickly master complicated information and produce better results in less time. Deep work will make you better at what you do and provide the sense of true fulfillment that comes from craftsmanship. In short, deep work is like a super power in our increasingly competitive twenty-first century economy. And yet, most people have lost the ability to go deep-spending their days instead in a frantic blur of e-mail and social media, not even realizing there's a better way.In Deep Work, author and professor Cal Newport flips the narrative on impact in a connected age. Instead of arguing distraction is bad, he instead celebrates the power of its opposite. Dividing this book into two parts, he first makes the case that in almost any profession, cultivating a deep work ethic will produce massive benefits. He then presents a rigorous training regimen, presented as a series of four "rules," for transforming your mind and habits to support this skill.A mix of cultural criticism and actionable advice, Deep Work takes the reader on a journey through memorable stories-from Carl Jung building a stone tower in the woods to focus his mind, to a social media pioneer buying a round-trip business class ticket to Tokyo to write a book free from distraction in the air-and no-nonsense advice, such as the claim that most serious professionals should quit social media and that you should practice being bored. Deep Work is an indispensable guide to anyone seeking focused success in a distracted world.
The Power of Vulnerability: Teachings of Authenticity, Connections and Courage
Brené Brown - 2013
Brené Brown, “we associate vulnerability with emotions we want to avoid such as fear, shame, and uncertainty. Yet we too often lose sight of the fact that vulnerability is also the birthplace of joy, belonging, creativity, authenticity, and love.” On The Power of Vulnerability, Dr. Brown offers an invitation and a promise - that when we dare to drop the armor that protects us from feeling vulnerable, we open ourselves to the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives. Here she dispels the cultural myth that vulnerability is weakness and reveals that it is, in truth, our most accurate measure of courage.“The Power of Vulnerability is a very personal project for me,” Brené explains. “This is the first place that all of my work comes together. This audio course draws from all three of my books - it’s the culmination of everything I’ve learned over the past twelve years. I'm very excited to weave it all into a truly comprehensive form that shows what these findings and insights can mean in our lives.”Guidance and Insights for Wholehearted LivingOver the past twelve years, Dr. Brené Brown has interviewed hundreds of people as part of an ongoing study of vulnerability. “The research shows that we try to ward disappointment with a shield of cynicism, disarm shame by numbing ourselves against joy, and circumvent grief by shutting off our willingness to love,” explains Dr. Brown. When we become aware of these patterns, she teaches, we begin to become conscious of how much we sacrifice in the name of self-defense -and how much richer our lives become when we open ourselves to vulnerability.“In my research,” Dr. Brown says, “the word I use to describe people who can live from a place of vulnerability is wholehearted.” Being wholehearted is a practice—one that we can choose to cultivate through empathy, gratitude, and awareness of our vulnerability armor. Join this engaging and heartfelt teacher on The Power of Vulnerability as she offers profound insights on leaning into the full spectrum of emotions—so we can show up, let ourselves be seen, and truly be all in.HIGHLIGHTSCultivating shame resilience—the key to developing a sense of worth and belonging.Vulnerability as the origin point for innovation, adaptability, accountability, and visionary leadership.Our emotional armory - how we use perfectionism, numbing, and other tactics to avoid feeling vulnerable.The myths of vulnerability - common misconceptions about weakness, trust, and self-sufficiency.Discovering your vulnerability armor - recognizing what makes us shut down, and how we can change.The 10 guideposts of wholehearted living - essential skills for becoming fully engaged in life.Six hours of stories, warm humor, and transformative insights for living a life of courage, authenticity, and compassion from Dr. Brené Brown.