But how do you cope when, to top it all, you discover you are old enough to be the mother of everyone else in your NCT group? The story of one woman, one new baby, a slipped disc and rather too many wrinkles, The Secret Diary of a New Mum (Aged 43 1/4) follows the tale of a midlife mum as she tries to make the transition from experienced TV producer to utterly inexperienced parent. One in five babies is born to a mum over 35, and the number of over 40s giving birth has doubled. The first humorous narrative account of what it's really like to be a midlife mum - whether it's deftly side-stepping any questions about age and baby number two or weeping as younger counterparts ping back into their size ten jeans within thirty seconds of giving birth - this is the thoroughly entertaining, insightful and often hilarious account of what happens as you face up to menopause and new motherhood at the same time.

    Because Lara left her family and boyfriend Flynn eighteen years ago without a word to anyone. Why has no one heard from her since? Her childhood best friend Evie is thrilled Lara's back and able to share her happiness. Evie's about to walk down the aisle with her dream man, Joel. Or so she thinks... Then there's Flynn Erskine, even more attractive now and stunned to see Lara again. The spark between them is as strong as ever, but how's Flynn going to react when he discovers the secret she's been keeping from him? Oh yes, there's a lot of catching up to be done...

    « Funny Jokes » is one of the best compilations of jokes in English that will surely hold your attention. In this book you can find all sorts of jokes that will amuse you and will create a good mood for you. Have fun reading these hilarious jokes!

    Addictively hilarious, the results show a world persuasively transformed. Please Don't Fuck the Pigeons, indeed. What happens if one triggers the Automatic Sprinkler Fuck Off Valve? And is it any wonder The Fuck Depot is so popular? All photographs are unretouchedthe result of countless hours on the hunt for the almost perfect sign, in need of just the slightest improvement. This is not social commentary. There is no message. It's not meant to offend, exploit, or embarrass anyone. All real stickers. All real signs. All in fun.

    This edition contains substantial excerpts from the original four-act version which was never produed, as well as the full test of the final three-act version, selections from Wilde's correspondence, and commentary by George Bernard Shaw, Max Beerbohm, St. John Hankin, and James Agate.

    Though he'd rather be at home drinking his liver to death, his spiteful editor delivers an ultimatum: take the assignment or lose the steady paycheck. Since Cobb can't afford to turn down the job, he heads to Atlanta and dives head first into the realm of Griffin*Con, renowned the world over as the Mardis Gras of geek conventions. There, he finds all of the science fiction, fantasy, and cosplay he would expect, but he also finds something more sinister: a seedy underbelly of geeky debauchery, slash fiction, booze, sex, and drugs. Can he make it through this assignment without snapping and winding up on the front page himself? Or will the entire experience change him in ways he never imagined possible? It's been called "A masterful blend of fictional Gonzo journalism and geek culture that is sure to please audiences inside and outside the geek community."

    In this parody of the famous children's book We're Going on a Bear Hunt, two parents set off for a night on the tiles, and encounter a series of watering holes and bars before an alarming encounter with a 'bear' sends them running home to their children.Gillian Johnson is the author and illustrator of the successful Monster Hospital and Thora series for children. Her illustrations bring this story to life, gently parodying the original but adding an anarchic edge as the evening progresses.We're not going on a bar hunt again!

    Mark Thomas' fourth book is a funny account of a challenge that had national repercussions. The challenge was to perform 100 acts of dissent within the year or donate £1000 to UKIP. (Nothing like a little incentive.) The targets were multiple; from corporate greed and public service inanities to infringements of rights. This is his account of the adventure and is sure to inspire. This book contains many photos and graphics, and so has been produced as a fixed-format colour ebook. It is only recommended for the newer, colour ebook readers.

    But is her husband’scrazy scheme a bit too exciting?Sarah’s mind-numbing housewife existence is turning her brain to mush. With herthird bun in the oven, this British mum is drowning under a mountain of playdates,bills, and head lice checks. But her man’s get-rich-quick idea of writing steamynovels isn’t her ideal way to dial up life’s passion.Drew desperately wants a break from Sarah’s whinging. And if that meansresearching how to write racy books all by himself, then he’ll make the sacrifice. Butas he finally warms Sarah up to the sultry side hustle, their R-rated private projectgets publicly exposed…With an office scandal brewing, it’s only a matter of time before gawking workersand a perfectly nosy PTA president turn them into social pariahs.Can Sarah and Drew earn some extra income from sizzling lit without falling prey tostiff gossip?Erotic Fiction is a charming comedy for fans of humorous fiction. If you like sweetlove stories, endearing characters, and dry British humor, then you’ll adore KindleStoryteller Award Winner Hannah Lynn’s delightful tale.Buy Erotic Fiction to slip into something a little more lovable today!

    The only catch is that she has to look after a pet dog in exchange for board.She soon finds herself trying to juggle auditions, the demise of a long-term relationship and a blossoming fling, all whist hiding a sinister secret concealed within her suitcase.

    A former repo chick, she'd hung up her lock picks for a new career as a private eye. But when her old boss calls up with an offer to repossess a Rolls Royce, the thrill-seeker in Leah can't refuse.Things get crazy and dangerous when Leah's trip to Chicago turns out to be more than just a simple boost. As the dead bodies start piling up, she runs afoul with a homicide cop named Lt. Jack Daniels, and her uncouth ex-partner, Harry McGlade.JACKED UP! teams up Tracy Sharp's unorthodox heroine (REPO CHICK BLUES, FINDING CHLOE, DIRTY BUSINESS) with J.A. Konrath's stalwart cop (WHISKEY SOUR, SHAKEN, STIRRED) in an action-packed, hilarious mystery-thriller.This short novel is 20,000 words long (about 75 pages), and is a great introduction to the worlds of Leah Ryan and Jack Daniels, while also being a treat for longtime fans of both series. Warning: Contains what may be the funniest sex scene ever written. And a ninja.

    M. Homes has been among the boldest and most original voices of her generation, acclaimed for the psychological accuracy and unnerving emotional intensity of her storytelling. Her keen ability to explore how extraordinary the ordinary can be is at the heart of her touching and funny new novel, her first in six years. Richard Novak is a modern-day Everyman, a middle-aged divorcé trading stocks out of his home. He has done such a good job getting his life under control that he needs no one- except his trainer, nutritionist, and housekeeper. He is functionally dead and doesn't even notice until two incidents-an attack of intense pain that lands him in the emergency room, and the discovery of an expanding sinkhole outside his house-conspire to hurl him back into the world. On his way home from the hospital, Richard forms the first of many new relationships: He meets Anhil, the doughnut shop owner, an immigrant who dreams big. He finds a weeping housewife in the produce section of the supermarket, helps save a horse that has fallen into the sinkhole, daringly rescues a woman from the trunk of her kidnapper's car, and, after the sinkhole claims his house and he has to relocate to a Malibu rental, he befriends a reluctant counterculture icon. In the end, Richard is also brought back in closer touch with his family-his aging parents, his brilliant brother, the beloved ex-wife whom he still desires, and finally, before the story's breathtaking finale, with his estranged son Ben. The promised land of Los Angeles-a surreal city of earthquakes, wildfires, mudslides, and feral Chihuahuas-is also very much a character in This Book Will Save Your Life. A vivid, revealing novel about compassion, transformation, and what can happen if you are willing to lose yourself and open up to the world around you, it should significantly broaden Homes's already substantial audience.

    A city robbing and killing people since 50BC.The Vizz: an industry in crisis. Baxter Stone, a film maker and television veteran, a lifelong Londoner (who thinks he sees better than others) is having problems in the postbrain, crumbling capital. Swindled by an insurance company, he's in in debt; a Lamborghini is blocking his drive and MI6 is blocking his mobile reception. He hopes to turn it round and get the documentary series that will get him the Big Money. But what do you do if history is your sworn enemy and the whole world conspires against you? Is there any way, you could, for a moment, rule the world justly?Darkly comic, How to Rule The World follows Baxter's battle for truth, justice and classy colour grading as it takes him from the pass of Thermopylae, to the peacocking serial killers of Medieval France, and the war in Syria. A trip from the Garden of Eden to Armageddon, plus reggae.Demonstrating Fischer's inimitable talent for eviscerating social satire, How to the Rule the World is a magnificently funny read to stand alongside his best loved works, the Man Booker shortlisted Under the Frog, The Thought Gang and Don't Read This Book If You're Stupid, all of which Corsair will publish in e-book next year.

    I’m so famous now that The New York Times plugged my autobiography. “Uggie will bark all in a memoir,” it announced. Well, I’ve certainly had a lot to bark about lately. Even before The Artist stunned us all by hitting the big time and winning five Oscars, inside I knew (as did my wonderful acting coach Omar) that I was an artist. I may have been merely a pound-bound hound when I joined Omar’s troupe, and certain species-ist quarters have contended that I mindlessly do tricks for treats, but it’s not true. I was milking a crowd as a young street performer when my canine companions and I were doing gigs for biscuit money. Yes, I’ve always been a bit of an attention-seeker, but aren’t all great actors? Expect some real treats. Perhaps not quite as tasty as pizza, but still lip-smackingly good. Not just the stories of how I got into showbiz or why I fell nose over paws in love with my divine Miss W (that’s Reese Witherspoon to the rest of you), but also the dirty doggie truth about Cat-Gate. And, well, a few more youthful misdemeanors . . .such as Zebra-Gate and Cockatoo-Gate and the truly shameful Binge-Gate. I’m fond of a good romp, and this candid canine tell-all zips along with revealing tales of celebrity encounters and how I cope with fame. Of course there’s some sad stuff too, including the health problems that forced me into early retirement. I’ve given my all in this honest-to-dog Hollywood memoir, because that’s what I always do. I hope you’ll gobble up every word, just like I wolf down sausages. Love and licks, Uggie

    He has kept a blog of his daily working life since 2003 and his award-winning writing is, by turn, moving, cynical, funny, heart-rending, and compassionate. From the tragic to the hilarious, the stories Tom tells give a fascinatingand at times alarming picture of life in inner-city Britain, and the people who are paid to mop up after it.