For example, I was once pinned down by a young lad who repeatedly asked me why I was hitting myself, when he knew full well that I had temporarily ceded hegemony over my hands and forearms. I tried to explain it to him, but he didn’t seem to comprehend. In retrospect, I can only conclude that my explanation was not articulate enough.To that end, I and Phil Plait have teamed up to create precisely 128 insults designed to weaken the resolve of aggressors, while educating them in their primary field of interest. Whether the person pummeling you is a student of mathematics or belles-lettres, we have the right words for the occasion.Zach WeinersmithPS: In the highly likely situation that the person pummeling you refuses to cease his aggression until he understands the meaning of the insult, we have also provided an appendix in which the insults are explained.

    In her trademark bossy, witty, and authoritative way, Miss Manners gives advice that will make the big day more pleasant for one and all, including the bride. 15 line drawings.

    This hilarious book could save your career and get you the keys to the executive washroom! It is the ultimate guide to going to the toilet at work, and is filled with practical advice for dealing with all sorts of poop-related problems.

    This Rosary tool has also been consistently in the Amazon top ten best selling books of Prayer since every month since its release; this includes paperback and kindle prayer books. Buy with confidence and may it enhance your opportunity to pray to Our Lady.This is a tool to allow you to use your Kindle to pray the rosary. This version of the rosary is intended to allow for praying the rosary with the turn of each page acting as a rosary bead. It contains all four rosary mysteries Joyful, Sorrowful, Glorious, and Luminous. The table of contents will allow you to jump to any of the four mysteries. Given that the Kindle, Nook, and other eBook devices allow thousands of books to be carried within them, it makes sense that the most powerful prayer in the world should also be included. Turning one page for each bead of the rosary makes the device feel and respond like a rosary necklace. Praying the rosary is an art which includes a certain rhythm of changing beads and prayers while in contemplation. Other rosary books either teach the prayers or outline the process but don’t account for the rhythm an art of contemplation that the process itself supports. This version allows that process to be integrated into the book itself; no beads required. While I personally love rosary beads, I don’t always have them available. I also like having the precise bible scriptures associated with each Mystery integrated into the process itself; it allows a more detailed focus by reading the actual living word of God without losing rhythm. While I personally know what the mysteries are about and what each decade story is, it adds a bit of opportunity to read in detail the bible passages of each mystery while not breaking stride with the prayer process. And, if there is ever a moment of distraction by events around me, I never lose my exact spot in praying the rosary.I pray that this book enhances opportunity for you to pray the rosary on many occasions when otherwise you may not have, and I hope it enhances your prayers on a regular basis through deeper connection with the scriptures which are the living word of God. The following updates were made based on user recommendations:VERSION UPDATED JULY 22, 2012 - Changed the table of contents to show the correct day for Luminous Mysteries to be prayed 'Thursday', updated the Glory Be prayer to be included after the first 3 Hail Mary's at the opening of each Mystery, Updated the Glory Be to be worded more technically correct.VERSION UPDATED DECEMBER 11, 2011 - Changed language of Apostle's Creed to match Catholic Church New Translation, fixed misspelled word "beech" to read "beseech", fixed missing bible verse for Mysteries "crowning with thorns" and "coronation of mary".

     Sometimes society is wrong. Meet the best of the absolute worst-the perpetrators of the most wretched demonstrations of moral conduct ever:Super Snorer Terrible Baby Namer Hot Water User-Upper Express Checkout Cheater No-Umbrella Etiquette Lady Eight-Minute Voicemail Leaver Dude Who Takes Board Games Too SeriouslyPeople Who Deserve It exposes everyone and everything whose behavior, life choices, and sometimes odor leave humanity with only one painful option: a punch to the face.

    Updated atlas contains maps of every U.S. state that are 35% larger than the standard atlas version plus over 350 detailed city inset and national park maps and a comprehensive, unabridged index. Road construction projects and updates highlighted for every state and conveniently located above the maps. Contains mileage chart showing distances between 77 North American cities and national parks with driving times map. Tough spiral binding allows the book to lay open easily. Other Features Best of the Road - Our editor's favorite road trips from our Best of the Road collection follows scenic routes along stretches of coastline, both east and west, to forests mountains, and prairies; and through small towns and big cities. For a weekend or a week there's something for everyone. Tell Rand! As much as we work to keep our atlases up to date, conditions change quickly and new construction projects begin frequently. If you know of something we haven't captured in our atlas, let us know at randmcnally.com/tellrand. Tourism websites and phone numbers for every U.S. state and Canadian province on map pages

    The 4 quilts in this pattern use 1 big block to make quilts that are about 45 inches square finished. The units for these quilts include four patches, nine patches, half square triangles and tri square triangles.

    

    Based on his column in the acclaimed magazine "mental_floss," this collection of conversations is incredibly funny, but each interview is also based on serious research, so in addition to laughing, readers actually learn real history. "The Dead Guy Interviews" includes discussions with: Alexander the Great Beethoven Napol?on Bonaparte Buddha Julius Caesar Caligula George Washington Carver Catherine the Great Winston Churchill Cleopatra Confucius Crazy Horse Salvador Dal? Charles Darwin Emily Dickinson Albert Einstein Benjamin Franklin Sigmund Freud Genghis Khan Vincent van Gogh Henry VIII J. Edgar Hoover Harry Houdini Thomas Jefferson Joan of Arc Robert Johnson Frida Kahlo Leonardo da Vinci Abraham Lincoln Mao Tse-tung Karl Marx Michelangelo Montezuma Mozart Nostradamus Edgar Allan Poe William Shakespeare Sun Tzu Mae West Oscar Wilde

    He calls for boycotting Canada, says Adolf Hitler would have been a card-carrying member of the ACLU, and thinks Hurricane Katrina victims seen carrying televisions should be shot on sight. Amann and Breuer – the creators of the hugely popular website www.sweetjesusihatebilloreilly.com — take a close look at O'Reilly's own assertions and arguments — taken from his TV and radio shows, books and columns — to expose him for what he is: a self-righteous boob and a sham newsman. The ongoing themes explored in Sweet Jesus, I Hate Bill O'Reilly are that O'Reilly is a bit crazy, not all that sharp and, as the authors put it, about "as self-aware as a legume." The result is a hilariously funny book, a great read for anyone who enjoys seeing a puffed-up blowhard taken down a notch or two — whether they're an O'Reilly hater, fan, or something in between.

    His plan may have worked all too well. Now, to save us from creeping socialism, death panels and everything progressive, he has written the antidote, Tea Party Fairy Tales. In Tea Party Fairy Tales, Red Riding Hood stands up for her Second Amendment rights, the Little Match Girl defends the magic of the free market to her grave, and Jack of “Beanstalk” fame shows the moral decay of a life on the dole. For those who find these too long-winded, more than a dozen Aesop’s Fables have been reworked to illustrate the eternal truths of American conservatism in handy, shouting-points form. Tea Party Fairy Tales deserves a place on every young American’s nightstand, right next to the Rush Limbaugh plush doll and a Smith & Wesson automatic, to help prevent the destruction of everything good and true in American culture. “Wake up, Storybookland! Before it’s too late!”

    Koalas look cuddly, but they're actually irritable, solitary beasts who do not want belly rubs. What kind of mocking god created creatures with poofy ears and big black noses that don't want belly rubs? BOpossums: North America gets one lousy marsupial, and let's just say it's not going to win any beauty contests. Or even not-ugly contests. C−Wombats: "Wombat" is a great name. It's got a "wom" and a "bat," and an "omba." They're kind of nondescript animals, cute in a generic pudgy mammal way, but their name spelled backward is "tabmow," and that makes all the difference. AThe Book of Ratings is hysterically arbitrary and undeniably infectious.

    Some of the facts are funny. Some are surprising. And some are just plain weird. But all of them are true—and irresistibly fascinating!You'll find information on virtually every subject under the sun, including: Philosophy: On February 8, 2000, the meaning of life was auctioned on eBay. The winning bid was $3.26. Popular Culture: Charlie Chaplin once lost a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest. Science: Dolly the sheep—the first cloned mammal—was named after country singer Dolly Parton. Sex: The largest human cell is the female ovum. The smallest is the male sperm. Sports: The average lifespan of an NHL hockey puck is 7 minutes. Statistics: On average, women utter 7,000 words a day while men manage just over 2,000.

    National television.

     Why so many people keep watching Duck Dynasty is because of something unique in the contemporary smorgasbord of contemporary television - the actual presence of real values. These people are salt of the earth folks who simply love each other and receive all of life as a gift. They also love God in a naturally supernatural way which is communicated without the necessity of words. There are real, human, redemptive values on display in each episode as the family faces the raising of children, remaining faithful to their marriages and supporting one another in the rough and tumble of real life. In addition, in almost every episode, they end with the extended family sharing a meal which begins with a heartfelt and sincere prayer of thanksgiving to the Lord. In this day and age where 'God' is a bad word to say, they embrace their faith and share it with the world. No wonder Duck Dynasty is one of the top shows on television today.