The Ducks In The Bathroom Are Not Mine: A decade of procrastination 2007 - 2017


David Thorne - 2017
     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

Toddlers Are A**holes: It's Not Your Fault


Sopha King Tyerd - 2014
    Delve deep into the mind of these creatures and learn what makes them tick.

The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life


Geoff Tibballs - 2011
    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

Confessions of a Call Centre Worker


Izabelle Winter - 2017
    Could you keep your cool while talking to all levels of stupid? Would you be able to wear a headset all day without wanting to throw it out of the window? All calls are recorded, analysed and timed to the second. Average handling time (AHT) is discussed as if it's the very meaning of life and managers are always coming up with new ways to shave milliseconds from each call. Is it acceptable to only have a total eight minutes a day for visits to the toilet or coffee machine? Imagine not being allowed to hang up on someone who is screaming abuse down the line at you. Welcome to the Call Centre! Izabelle worked in call centres for many years; from insurance to home shopping, from selling advertising to discussing loans. Finally in the early hours one morning, she decided enough was in fact far too much and left her final call centre job the same day, never to return. On her way out of the door for the final time she vowed she would write a book about life in a call centre. Here is that book. Read about call centres in general, memorable customers and staff. How do staff stay sane? What is Big Red? Are cranberries the true meaning of Christmas? Why would you have leather trousers round your ankles in a lift? How not to impress your boss. Izabelle shares these and many other true tales from her years of incarceration in UK call centres.

We Have a Good Time, Don't We?


Maeve Higgins - 2012
    She then promises to stop making terrible food analogies about everything.From terrifying hen nights, malevolent dolphins and angry bakers, to runaway cats, a stalker who won't commit and the curse of over-politeness, Maeve writes with warmth and wit about what it's like to be a regular human girl. And, crucially, she finally reveals the truth about her relationship with Michael Fassbender.We Have a Good Time...Don't We? introduces a strikingly original voice that celebrates the truth of what we really feel about ourselves through these hilarious and perceptive snapshots of a life considered.

Making It Up As I Go Along


Marian Keyes - 2016
    There's the pure and bounteous joy of the nail varnish museum. Not to mention the very best lies to tell if you find yourself on an Arctic cruise. She has words of advice for those fast approaching fifty. And she's here to tell you the secret secret truth about writers - well, this one anyway.You'll be wincing in recognition and scratching your head in incredulity, but like Marian herself you won't be able to stop laughing at the sheer delightful absurdity that is modern life - because each and every one of us is clearly making it up as we go along.

How to (Almost) Make Friends on the Internet


Michael Cunningham - 2020
    And one very annoyed world.Based on the ingenious Sir Michael Twitter account, How to (Almost) Make Friends on the Internet is the funniest book you'll read this year.Whether it's offering his services as a Karate Lawyer or Funeral DJ, devising the world's worst plan to get a free haircut, or trying to buy a blue bucket that may or may not be for sale, Michael just wants to connect with people.The only problem is that people are slightly less enthusiastic about connecting with him, and the results are utterly hilarious.Warning: you'll never think about adding someone called Michael to a group chat the same way ever again.

Ross O'carroll Kelly's Guide To South Dublin: How To Get By On, Like, 10,000 Euro A Day


Ross O'Carroll-Kelly - 2007
    The Ross Guide to South Dublin contains all you need to know about this extraordinary region, where it'll be soon be too expensive for anyone to live.

Dear Air 2000


Terry Ravenscroft - 2011
    Meet the 38 stones man who has never flown before and stands fat chance of ever doing so. The man who thinks his distinct Turkish looks won't go down very with the locals in the Greek half of Cyprus. The passenger who wants to enjoy the flight with his inflatable rubber woman sat on his knee. The man who suspects his false teeth may have been stolen by one of the cabin crew. Meet these delightful people plus many, many more, and enjoy the funniest read you'll have had for ages. If you enjoyed the Henry Root Letters you'll love Dear Air 2000..

The Secret World Of The Irish Male


Joseph O'Connor - 1994
    The result is a headlong, love-struck, end-of-millenium, coast-to-coast tour of the frustrations, contraditions and giddying glories of being Irish in the 1990s.

The Life and Loves of a He Devil


Graham Norton - 2014
    He is loved for his delight in the peculiar and for his ability to find humor and a common ground in all that life brings. Here is Graham's funny and honest memoir on the theme of love. As he shows, it's really the things you love that make you who you are and so Graham tells his story from his Irish childhood to the present day, describing just what and who he loved—and sometimes lost—as a young boy, and his new loves and obsessions—big and small—as he's grown older. It's been 10 years since his last book and being a decade older Graham has come to realize that what makes a life interesting is less what happens to you and more what inspires and drives you, what you love. From Dolly Parton and dogs to wine and Ireland, Graham tells of his life and loves with characteristic humor and outrageous candor.

The Gospel According to Blindboy


Blindboy Boatclub - 2017
    Covering themes ranging from love and death to sex and politics, there's a story about a girl from Tipp being kicked out of ISIS, a van powered by Cork people's accents and a man who drags a fridge on his back through Limerick.

Fat Chance: My Life in Ups, Downs and Crisp Sandwiches


Louise McSharry - 2016
    a ballsy paean to self-determination and body confidence ... McSharry's style is a pleasure: precise, colloquial, tightly paced. She's nailed the elusive directness central to the work of essayists like Lena Dunham. If you read one heart-breaking yet bouncy true-life memoir this summer, make sure it's this one.' Sunday Times 'An absolutely stunning piece of work ... just a fantastic book' Roisin Ingle'Hello there @louisemcsharry. Well, I LOVED your book and now I LOVE YOU TOO!!!!! You are INSPIRATIONAL!' Marian Keyes on Twitter'Louise is heartbreakingly honest. A sharp, well-observed, and ultimately inspirational read. Every woman of every age should read this book.' Louise O'Neill'Searingly honest ... at times makes for heart-breaking reading but Louise is at her most inspiring talking about her journey towards fat acceptance' Irish Daily Star'Louise's life reads like a thriller - I had goose-bumps throughout! Brave, funny, emotional and totally relatable for women.' Roz Purcell'Hugely enjoyable. So honest and insightful. I loved the positivity and the REALNESS! Will be amazing for young women to read.' Una Mullaly'Both heart-warming and heart-breaking. Vividly raw and surprisingly visceral, Louise makes you feel every single bit.' Angela Scanlon'Should be compulsory reading for all young people, male and female. Older readers will also be inspired by McSharry's no-nonsense approach ... Whether writing about sex, feminism, family or body acceptance, McSharry is compassionate, funny and wise' Irish Times'A mighty woman, with cojones the size of Mexico and coolness in the face of adversity not seen since John Wayne's heyday' Irish Independent'She's a straight shooter, honest and to the point' The HeraldLouise McSharry's passion is to talk to young women (and the men who love them), about being a woman in the modern world. Drawing on her own 33 years of life, she writes about everything from surviving a messed up childhood, to crashing out of education and still making it, to figuring out sex, weight, feminism, make-up, friendship, workplace politics and a whole lot more.Though she has the raw material (the early death of her father and being taken into care at seven because of her mother's alcoholism) the last thing Louise wanted do was to write a misery memoir. She wasn't keen on writing a cancer survival story either (she went through treatment while planning her wedding ... trying on white dresses while sweating and hairless - not a good look).So, though it has its sad moments, Fat Chance is honest, upbeat, irreverent and inspirational - just like a long chat with a best friend. A fabulous, funny and wise best friend!

Autocorrect FAILS! Text Messaging Autocorrect Gone Horribly Wrong


THE CLOWN FACTORY - 2013
    This book was brought to you by the one and only - THE CLOWN FACTORY.

Otis Lee Crenshaw: I Blame Society


Rich Hall - 2005
    A man not above faking his own death to sell more records, this is his not quite true story of romance, recidivism, country music, and an unshakeable belief in Marriage at First Sight.