The Dot and the Line: A Romance in Lower Mathematics


Norton Juster - 1963
    But the dot, though perfect in every way, only had eyes for a wild and unkempt squiggle. All of the line's romantic dreams were in vain, until he discovered...angles! Now, with newfound self-expression, he can be anything he wants to be--a square, a triangle, a parallelogram....And that's just the beginning!First published in 1963 and made into an Academy Award-winning animated short film, here is a supremely witty love story with a twist that reveals profound truths about relationships--both human and mathematical--sure to tickle lovers of all ages.

How to Live with a Neurotic Dog


Stephen Baker - 1960
    Try looking at the world through your dog's big melting brown eyes. If your dog is neurotic (and what dog isn't these days?), consider these helpful pointers:• Don't interrupt your dog's naps—remember, he needs your bed far more than you do.• Don't force your dog to play fetch just because you feel like it—keep in mind his busy schedule too.• Never bark orders at your dog. "Please" and "thank you" work wonders with the neurotic dog.• Give your dog a canine personality quiz—it's the first step before starting him on full-fledged psychoanalysis.• If all else fails, feed him!Stephen Baker's delightful HOW TO LIVE WITH A NEUROTIC DOG is sure to have both you and your canine companion rolling on the floor and begging for more.

300 Best Jokes: One-Liners and Funny Short Stories Collection (Donald's Humor Factory Book 1)


Donald Shaw - 2017
    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories


B.J. Novak - 2014
    Novak's One More Thing: Stories and Other Stories is an endlessly entertaining, surprisingly sensitive, and startlingly original debut collection that signals the arrival of a welcome new voice in American fiction.Across a dazzling range of subjects, themes, tones, and narrative voices, Novak's assured prose and expansive imagination introduce readers to people, places, and premises that are hilarious, insightful, provocative, and moving-often at the same time.In One More Thing, a boy wins a $100,000 prize in a box of Frosted Flakes - only to discover that claiming the winnings may unravel his family. A woman sets out to seduce motivational speaker Tony Robbins - turning for help to the famed motivator himself. A school principal unveils a bold plan to permanently abolish arithmetic. An acclaimed ambulance driver seeks the courage to follow his heart and throw it all away to be a singer-songwriter. Author John Grisham contemplates a monumental typo. A new arrival in heaven, overwhelmed by infinite options, procrastinates over his long-ago promise to visit his grandmother. We meet a vengeance-minded hare, obsessed with scoring a rematch against the tortoise who ruined his life; and post-college friends who debate how to stage an intervention in the era of Facebook. We learn why wearing a red t-shirt every day is the key to finding love; how February got its name; and why the stock market is sometimes just... down.Finding inspiration in questions from the nature of perfection to the icing on carrot cake, from the deeply familiar to the intoxicatingly imaginative, One More Thing finds its heart in the most human of phenomena: love, fear, family, ambition, and the inner stirring for the one elusive element that might make a person complete. The stories in this collection are like nothing else, but they have one thing in common: they share the playful humor, deep heart, inquisitive mind, and altogether electrifying spirit of a writer with a fierce devotion to the entertainment of the reader.

#WeRateDogs: The Most Hilarious and Adorable Pups You've Ever Seen


Matt Nelson - 2017
    It is not only an exceptionally reliable source for dog greatness, it is also a one stop shop for happiness.   This book takes readers on a journey through the strict science of dog rating and the unwavering rules associated with it. Questioning the accuracy of these ratings is ill-advised. They are certainly not arbitrary and this book is absolutely not just about how cute dogs are. It truly is all about precision and ethics in dog rating.   The #WeRateDogs book will produce an audible reaction with every flip of the page—whether a groan from a terrible pupper pun or an “aww” of seeing a super floofer. If #WeRateDogs takes you away from reality and pushes you into this conglomerate of absurdity for even a second, then it has fulfilled its purpose.   “Witty, ironic captions that are cute, hilarious, and relatable all at once . . . WeRateDogs is a cultural force in its own right.” —Salon   “Next-level understanding of internet escapism . . . The real magic is the delightfully surreal captions.” —Esquire   “Such lighthearted humor . . . As WeRateDogs followers are constantly reminded, all dogs are good dogs.” —NPR

More of Dave Barry's Greatest Hits


Dave Barry - 1996
    What Dave Barry did for American history in Dave Barry Slept Here and for getting older in Dave Barry Turns Forty, he does for everything else in America! Tupperware ladies, eighties people and leisure-concept salesmen beware: Dave Barry is on the loose and no one is safe!

Everything I Need to Know I Learned from Dungeons & Dragons - One Woman's Quest to Trade Self-Help for Elf-Help


Shelly Mazzanoble - 2011
    With tongue-in-cheek humor, the creator of the award-winning Confessions of a Part-Time Sorceress takes on the self-help section, proving that the benefits of the Dungeons & Dragons® game goes far beyond simple entertainment.

Paws in the Proceedings


Deric Longden - 2007
    Full of homespun wisdom, gentle wit and charm, Paws in the Proceedings is the second book of Deric’s gentle tales of life in Huddersfield with his wife Aileen and their menagerie of playful cats with big personalities.

Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops


Jen Campbell - 2012
    isn't it?'A John Cleese Twitter question ['What is your pet peeve?'], first sparked the 'Weird Things Customers Say in Bookshops' blog, which grew over three years into one bookseller's collection of ridiculous conversations on the shop floor. From 'Did Beatrix Potter ever write a book about dinosaurs?' to the hunt for a paperback which could forecast the next year's weather; and from 'I've forgotten my glasses, please read me the first chapter' to 'Excuse me... is this book edible?: here is a book for heroic booksellers and booklovers everywhere.This full-length collection illustrated by the Brothers McLeod also includes top 'Weird Things' from bookshops around the world.

Ask a Ninja Presents The Ninja Handbook: This Book Looks Forward to Killing You Soon


Douglas Sarine - 2008
    But whether your journey lasts five seconds or five days or (rather inconceivably) five years, all those who bravely take up this text and follow the tenets and trials laid out within will die knowing they were as ninja as they possibly could’ve been.For the true of heart or the extremely lucky, this powerful and honorable manuscript contains such phenomenal ninja wisdom as:•How to create and name your very own lethal ninja clan•The proper weapon to use when fighting a vampire pumpkin•Why clowns and robots are so dangerous on the Internet•Easy-to-follow charts showing when to slice and when to stab•How to execute such ultradeadly kicks as the Driving Miss Daisy•Why pretty much every ninja movie ever made sucks•How to make a shoggoth explode using well-placed foliage•What the heck a shoggoth is and why you’ll need to make it explode•Death Aide certification•And much more ninjafied enlightenment on every shuriken-sharp page!Remember: People do not take the Path, the Path takes people.

Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats


T.S. Eliot - 1939
    Eliot for his godchildren and friends in the thirties. They have delighted generations of children since, and inspired Andrew Lloyd Webber's brilliant musical Cats.

Poorly Drawn Lines: Good Ideas and Amazing Stories


Reza Farazmand - 2015
    Embrace it.A bear flies through space. A hamster suffers a breakdown. Elsewhere, a garden snake is arrested by animal control and jailed for home invasion, while a child marvels at the wonder of nature as worms emerge from the ground and begin looking for vodka (as they always have). These are common occurrences in the world of Reza Farazmand’s wildly popular webcomic, Poorly Drawn Lines. Traveling from deep space to alternate realities to the bottom of the ocean, this eponymous collection brings together fan favorites with new comics and original essays to share Farazmand’s inimitable take on love, nature, social acceptance, and robots.

Slothilda: Living the Sloth Life


Dante Fabiero - 2018
    Though Slothilda's sluggish ways might occasionally hold her back, it turns out her perceived deficits are actually her greatest attributes.Slothilda gives us permission to feel unashamed about our slothy tendencies and emphasizes the importance of celebrating our authentic selves.From former Simpsons animator Dante Fabiero comes this all-too-real comic series about an adorable little sloth who's driven by her desire for self-improvement. Slothilda explores an inner conflict we can all relate to–the desire to succeed and grow, while paradoxically dealing with the ever-present temptation to sloth.With hilarious themes related to work, fitness, food, shopping, and pets, this book shows that you're not the only sloth at heart.

Nothing's Sacred


Lewis Black - 2005
    You've seen his energetic stand-up performances on HBO, Comedy Central, and in venues across the globe. Now, for the first time, Lewis Black translates his volcanic eruptions into book form in Nothing's Sacred, a collection of rants against stupidity and authority, which oftentimes go hand in hand. With subversive wit and intellectual honesty, Lewis examines the events of his life that shaped his antiauthoritarian point of view and developed his comedic perspective. Growing up in 1950s suburbia when father knew best and there was a sitcom to prove it, he began to regard authority with a jaundiced eye at an early age. And as that sentiment grew stronger with each passing year, so did his ability to hone in on the absurd. True to form, he puts common sense above ideology and distills hilarious, biting commentary on all things politically and culturally relevant. "No one is safe from Lewis Black's comic missiles." (New York Times) You have been warned....

Bachelor Boys: The Young Ones Book


Ben Elton - 1984
    BACHELOR BOYS: The Young Ones Book by Ben Elton, Rik Mayall and Lise Mayer