Marvel at the thief who steals electrical wires without shutting off the current. Gape at the lawnchair jockey who floats to a height of 16,000 feet suspended by helium balloons. Learn from the man who peers into a gasoline can using a cigarette lighter. All three -- and many more -- contend for Darwin Awards when their choices culminate in magnificent misadventures. These tales of trial and awe-inspiring error--verified by the author and endorsed by website readers--illustrate the ongoing saga of survival of the fittest in all its selective glory.

    CNN has described him as "having the world's most interesting job." Read about Lansky's experiences: fending off hippos with a canoe paddle on the Zambezi Rivertest driving Ferraris in Italysurviving the world's largest tomato fight in Spainswimming with dolphins off the coast of New Zealandblowgun hunting with the Jaguar Indians in the Amazonriding an ostrich in South Africalassoing reindeer above the Arctic Circlewrestling an alligator in Floridaplaying ice golf in Finland

    There's the pure and bounteous joy of the nail varnish museum. Not to mention the very best lies to tell if you find yourself on an Arctic cruise. She has words of advice for those fast approaching fifty. And she's here to tell you the secret secret truth about writers - well, this one anyway.You'll be wincing in recognition and scratching your head in incredulity, but like Marian herself you won't be able to stop laughing at the sheer delightful absurdity that is modern life - because each and every one of us is clearly making it up as we go along.

    Jackie saw it all, and in The Joke Man: Bow to Stern he shares personal stories as well a look from behind the scenes at one of the highest-rated radio shows of all time. You’ll also get his take on his falling out with Howard and the show, and plenty of the raunchy, laugh-out–loud humor that Jackie “The Joke Man” is famous for. So sit back, relax, and enjoy as “The Joke Man” riffs on his one-of-a-kind career in show business, Howard Stern and the gang, and his very unique life—an American success story like no other.

    Armed with a sharp eye for the absurd and an overwhelming sense of doom, Rich explores the ridiculousness of our everyday lives. The world, he concludes, is a hopelessly terrifying place–with endless comic potential.–If your girlfriend gives you some “love coupons” and then breaks up with you, are the coupons still valid?–What kind of performance pressure does an endangered male panda feel when his captors bring the last remaining female panda to his cage?–If murderers can get into heaven by accepting Jesus, just how awkward is it when they run into their victims?Join Simon Rich as he explores the extraordinary and hilarious desperation that resides in ordinary life, from cradle to grave."Hilarious." -John Stewart

    More witty and stylish poetic therapy for the Venus and Mars generation.

    Some of the stories are inspired by true events. Find out which ones inside this scary collection. "The Girl I Married" Jonathan noticed that after marrying Jeanette, she starts acting strange. As if she is not the same girl he dated. Why is she so different and what secrets is she hiding? "I`m Sorry Daddy" After an accident at work, Mr. Williams starts developing unusual symptoms. He is turning into a monster and there is nothing to stop this. "The House Next Door part 2" Jessica decides to find out what happened to her friend Sarah. What new discoveries will she make and will the same fate befall her?

    Looks like something for everyone...There's even an alien puppy.Contents: * Introduction (The Newcomer) (2016) • essay by Alasdair Shaw * Tithe (2016) / short story by Griffin Carmichael * Exodus (2016) / short story by Alec Hutson * First Bonding (2016) / short story by Tom Germann * Ice Dreamer (2015) / short story by J. J. Green * The Nanny (2016) / short story by Cindy Carroll * Right Hand (2016) / short story by Jonathan C. Gillespie * What Make Is Your Cat? (2016) / short story by Richard Crawford * Kaxian Duty (2014) / short story by Cherise Kelley * Lessons Learned (2016) / short story by J. Naomi Ay * The Humra (2016) / short story by Laura Greenwood * The Hawk of Destiny's Fist (2016) / short story by James S. Aaron * Repulse [Two Democracies: Revolution] (2016) / short story by Alasdair Shaw .

    Two wonderfully funny books in one edition.

    Gregg Olsen (If Loving You Is Wrong, Starvation Heights) and Rebecca Morris (Ted and Ann – The Mystery of a Missing Child and Her Neighbor Ted Bundy), are also the authors of If I Can’t Have You – Susan Powell, Her Mysterious Disappearance, and the Murder of Her Children (St. Martin’s, 2014) and Bodies of Evidence. About the Authors GREGG OLSEN IS THE NEW YORK TIMES, Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestselling author of twenty books, both true crime and fiction, including If I Can’t Have You, Abandoned Prayers, Closer than Blood, A Twisted Faith, Starvation Heights, If Loving You Is Wrong. He appears frequently on Dateline NBC, NPR, Good Morning America, The Early Show, FOX News; CNN, Anderson Cooper 360, Entertainment Tonight, Inside Edition, Extra, Access Hollywood, Snapped, Deadly Women, and A&E's Biography. REBECCA MORRIS IS A VETERAN JOURNALIST and the New York Times bestselling author (with Gregg Olsen) of Bodies of Evidence, and If I Can’t Have You – Susan Powell, Her Mysterious Disappearance, and the Murder of Her Children. She is also the author of Ted and Ann – The Mystery of a Missing Child and Her Neighbor Ted Bundy. She has appeared on Investigation Discovery, HLN, and in many other media. Stephanie Cook, contributor.

    In 1-2-3 Magic Teen, internationally renowned parenting expert Thomas W. Phelan explains how to better understand your teenager, which problems are not worth fighting over, and why your child's behavior likely matches the definition of a normal adolescent. With helpful, straightforward advice backed up by research and parent-tested strategies, 1-2-3 Magic Teen will help you establish a calmer, more respectful home and family life and show you how to guide your teenager into healthy, functional young adulthood. In this book, you'll find tools and advice tailored for the challenges of a teen lifestyle, including: Forgetting to do chores Absence in family outings Drop in grades Missed curfews Parties and drinking Work responsibilities

    In the beginning there was the Holy Bible2 Which was a very good book indeed, but so many things happened since the beginning,3 That Maybe it was time for another bible,4 So a punk from Philadelphia wrote a new one,5 And so it is called The Boomer Bible,6 So there.7 And Its Past Testament tells the history of the world, including the Book of Greeks, Book of Brits, Book of Yanks, Book of Russkies, and all the other self-proclaimed Chosen Nations,8 And people sticking each other with pointed sticks, and acting up, which is called civilization,9 And also about religion and art and movies and literature, and TV, and so forth, which is why there are also the Books of Pnowlege,10 Including Psongs, Psayings, and Psomethings,11 Written just like the other Bible but without any big unpronounceable words,12 So that you and I might truly understand it,13 For a change.14 And Its Present Testament tells about the coming of Harry, and The Way of Harry,15 Who may be the messiah everybody has been waiting for,16 Unless he really isn't,17 Which is hard to say,18 So there.19 And there is also The Book of Harrier Brayer together with the Harrier Hymnal,20 And another Testament too,21 And Concordance, and a lenticular hand on the cover.22 And It is not for the faint of heart,23 Or the easily offended,24 Or the priggish or the prudish,25 But who cares,26 Because neither was Candide, or Swift's A Modest Proposal, or Rabelais, or Lenny Bruce28 Or all the other satires and satirists who felt the need to warn us when we have gone astray,29 Which we have,29 Which you'll know all about,31 If you read your Boomer Bible,32 Or there.Over 87,000 copies in print.

    The #1 "New York Times" Bestselling Author of "A Man Called Ove" shares an irresistible and moving collection of heartfelt, humorous essays about fatherhood, providing his newborn son with the perspective and tools he'll need to make his way in the world.

    Civil War pits countrymen against one another and tears a nation asunder. Life and death are held in the balance where everyone is a slave to something. In a time when war brings the South to its knees, two women will forge a friendship in the fires of redemption and thrust Ironwood into a new future – where the battle for freedom has merely begun. Book Two: Heir of HopeA hidden diary. Dreams of the past. And a hope for a new future. Emily Burns grew up an orphan, so she never expected to inherit a southern plantation. When she discovers an old diary hidden in the attic, her life becomes strangely entwined with her Civil War ancestor and she soon begins to wonder how a woman long dead can keep showing up in her dreams.Book Three: Missing MercyThe venture ahead could leave their friendship behind.Made a safe-haven after the Civil War, Ironwood Plantation is a refuge of equality for former slaves. But twenty years and a new generation later, they have become an isolated community with little contact with the rest of the world.In a time where prejudices try to define them, Mercy Carpenter and Faith Harper must push the boundaries of their beliefs and trust in the God who holds the keys to freedom.

     One woman’s courageous story. Tricia Barker was a depressed, agnostic college student at The University of Texas in Austin...until a profound near-death experience (NDE) during surgery revolutionizes her entire world. As she learns to walk again, Tricia lets go of painful wounds from childhood and integrates some of the aftereffects of her spiritual journey into her daily life. She returns to college with renewed vigor, intending to embark on a new path by becoming an English teacher. But after a year of teaching in the US, Tricia travels to South Korea, where she is the victim of a sexual assault. Now, she must use the wisdom she gained on the Other Side to heal herself; and later, guide countless junior high, high school, and college students to greater peace. Through teaching and mentoring others—many of whom are struggling with traumas of their own—Tricia decides to devote her life to bringing the “light” she experienced during her NDE to individuals who are seeking solace, inspiration, and overall well-being.