J. O'Rourke's savagely funny and national best-seller Parliament of Whores has become a classic in understanding the workings of the American political system. Originally written at the end of the Reagan era, this new edition includes an extensive foreword by the renowned political writer Andrew Ferguson -- showing us that although the names and the players have changed, the game is still the same. Parliament of Whores is an exuberant, broken-field run through the ethical foibles, pork-barrel flimflam, and bureaucratic bullrorfle inside the Beltway that leaves no sacred cow unskewered and no politically correct sensitivities unscorched.

    Soon Manfried becomes the Garfield to Steve’s Jon Arbuckle: lazy, selfish, and sometimes maddening in his weird human behavior. Yet the pair depends on each other to get through life’s troubles. When Manfried runs away, Steve musters his meager resources to find his best man-friend and bring him home safe. Ultimately, both Steve and Manfried realize they’re capable of so much more than they thought.

    From scowling teenager to father of two, this biting, funny collection of personal stories, peppered with moments of surprising poignancy, proves that although this infamous Kid may be all grown up, his singular brand of humor and signature wit remain firmly intact.

    He makes movies, writes comics, owns a store, and now he s built a podcasting empire with his friends and family, including a wife who s way out of his league. So here s some tough shit: Kevin Smith has cracked the code. Or, he s just cracked. "Tough Sh*t" is the dirty business that Kevin has been digesting for 41 years and now, he s ready to put it in "your" hands. Smear this shit all over yourself, because this is your blueprint (or brownprint) for success. Kev takes you through some big moments in his life to help you live "your" days in as Gretzky a fashion as you can: going where the puck is "gonna" be. Read all about how a zero like Smith managed to make ten movies with no discernible talent, and how when he had everything he thought he d ever want, he decided to blow up his own career. Along the way, Kev shares stories about folks who inspired him (like George Carlin), folks who befuddled him (like Bruce Willis), and folks who let him jerk off onto their legs (like his beloved wife, Jen).So make this your daily reader. Hell, read it on the toilet if you want. Just make sure you grab the bowl and push, because you re about to take one "Tough Sh*t."

    Now here's a third delightful volume of memoirs rich with Herriot's own brand of humor, insight, and wisdom.In the midst of World War II, James is training for the Royal Air Force, while going home to Yorkshire whenever possible to see his very pregnant wife, Helen. Musing on past adventures through the dales, visiting with old friends, and introducing scores of new and amusing character--animal and human alike--Herriot enthralls with his uncanny ability to spin a most engaging and heartfelt yarn.Millions of readers have delighted in the wonderful storytelling and everyday miracles of James Herriot in the over thirty years since his delightful animal stories were first introduced to the world.

    Geared specifically for owners of adult cats, be they recently adopted or long time family pets, this book illustrates how it's never too late to correct behavior problems. With her trademark wit and common sense, Pam covers every aspect of a cat's lifestyle, behavior, and environment and gives cat owners specific techniques to help seemingly set-in-their-ways cats change for the better. Authoritative and entertaining, Starting from Scratch is the next best thing to a house call from the world's top feline behaviorist.

    Described by one reviewer as “like getting stabbed in the head,” the $6 million film earned a grand total of $1,800 at the box office and closed after two weeks. Now in its tenth anniversary year, The Room is an international phenomenon to rival The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Thousands of fans wait in line for hours to attend screenings complete with costumes, audience rituals, merchandising, and thousands of plastic spoons.Readers need not have seen The Room to appreciate its costar Greg Sestero’s account of how Tommy Wiseau defied every law of artistry, business, and interpersonal relationships to achieve the dream only he could love. While it does unravel mysteries for fans, The Disaster Artist is more than just an hilarious story about cinematic hubris: It is ultimately a surprisingly inspiring tour de force that reads like a page-turning novel, an open-hearted portrait of a supremely enigmatic man who will capture your heart.

    You’ve had a martini or three, and you mingle through the crowd, wondering how long you need to stay before going out for pizza. Suddenly you’re introduced to someone new, Dr. Nice Tomeetya. You forget the pizza. Now is the perfect time to bring up all those strange questions you’d like to ask during an office visit with your own doctor but haven’t had the guts (or more likely the time) to do so. You’re filled with liquid courage . . . now is your chance! If you’ve ever wanted to ask a doctor . . .•How do people in wheelchairs have sex?•Why do I get a killer headache when I suck down my milkshake too fast?•Can I lose my contact lens inside my head forever?•Why does asparagus make my pee smell?•Why do old people grow hair on their ears?•Is the old adage “beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer . . .” really true? . . . then Why Do Men Have Nipples? is the book for you.Compiled by Billy Goldberg, an emergency medicine physician, and Mark Leyner, bestselling author and well-known satirist, Why Do Men Have Nipples? offers real factual and really funny answers to some of the big questions about the oddities of our bodies.

    This book wouldn't elevate a cow. I cannot conscientiously recommend it for any useful purposes whatever. All I can suggest is that when you get tired of reading 'the best hundred books, ' you may take this up for half an hour. It will be a change." (from the Preface to "Idle Thoughts of an Idle Fellow by Jerome Jerome)

    Chet might have flunked out of police school ("I'd been the best leaper in K-9 class, which had led to all the trouble in a way I couldn't remember exactly, although blood was involved"), but he's a detective through and through.In this, their first adventure, Chet and Bernie investigate the disappearance of Madison, a teenage girl who may or may not have been kidnapped, but who has definitely gotten mixed up with some very unsavory characters. A well-behaved, gifted student, she didn't arrive home after school and her divorced mother is frantic. Bernie is quick to take the case-something about a cash flow problem that Chet's not all that clear about-and he's relieved, if vaguely suspicious, when Madison turns up unharmed with a story that doesn't add up. But when she disappears for a second time in a week, Bernie and Chet aren't taking any chances; they launch a full-blown investigation. Without a ransom demand, they're not convinced it's a kidnapping, but they are sure of one thing: something smells funny.Their search for clues takes them into the desert to biker bars and other exotic locals, with Chet's highly trained nose leading the way. Both Chet and Bernie bring their own special skills to the hunt, one that puts each of them in peril. But even as the bad guys try to turn the tables, this duo is nothing if not resourceful, and the result is an uncommonly satisfying adventure.With his doggy ways and his endearingly hardboiled voice, Chet is full of heart and occasionally prone to mischief. He is intensely loyal to Bernie, who, though distracted by issues that Chet has difficulty understanding-like divorce, child custody, and other peculiar human concerns-is enormously likable himself, in his flawed, all-too-human way.

    Inspired by her own feline's instinct to hunt and supported by her studies abroad, Thomas examines the life actions, as well as the similarities and differences of these majestic creatures. Lions, tigers, pumas and housecats: Her observations shed light on their social lives, thought processes, eating habits, and communication techniques, and reveal how they survive and coexist with each other and with humans.

    But not everyone knows Trixie Koontz. Trixie was the Koontz family's beloved golden retriever and in her lifetime gained quite a following of her own. This book tells her story.

    With easy-to-follow instructions for 16 distinct felines, Knit Your Own Cat is the irresistible guide to knitting the pet you've always wanted. Cats and knitters are perfect companions. What's better together than a kitten curled up in a basket of wool or a frisky feline chasing a skein of yarn down a hallway? Since the instant success of Knit Your Own Dog, cat lovers have been clamoring for a book of their own. That time has come. Knit Your Own Cat is packed with knitting patterns for 16 different fanciful felines, from a pretty Persian to a sleek Siamese, from a cuddly kitten to a traditional tabby. The cats are surprisingly easy to make: With a few evenings of work, you can have a covetable companion for life. Each cat includes clear, step-by-step instructions for both knitting and assembling the parts. The cats can be knit into various positions such as standing, sitting, crouching, and curled up for a nap. You can add details like collars, bells, and bows. Photographs throughout show the finished cat from various angles, and each cat is accompanied by a description of its real-life temperament and physical characteristics. Cats include: Abyssinian, Bengal, Black Cat, Black & White, British Shorthair, Burmese, Devon Rex, Kitten, Maine Coon, Orange, Persian, Ragdoll, Siamese, Tabby, Tortoiseshell, and Turkish Van.

    I wonder how many cats have died because of this confusion.Fact: The most germ-laden place on your toilet isn't the seat or even the bowl--it's the handle.The solution: Don't flush. Let the next guy worry about it.There are "just the facts"--and then there are just the facts that will frighten the bejeezus out of you. And thanks to this little gem of a bathroom book, you'll never look at the world the same way again, without, er, dry heaving a little bit.From the sneaky fish that can swim up our genitals to the E. coli bacteria lurking in the very water we drink, disturbing phenomena are everywhere we turn. Educational, entertaining, and undeniably horrifying, this book isn't guaranteed to help you, um, go to the bathroom, but it's certain to make your time there more...informed.

    His sidekick just stole his girlfriend. The galaxy's most hideous and feared bounty hunter wants to lay eggs in his brain. And the luxury space yacht Cole just hijacked turns out of be filled with interstellar do-gooders, one especially loathsome stowaway, and a cargo of freeze-dried orphans.Reluctantly compelled to deliver these defenseless, fluidless children to safety, Cole gathers a misfit crew for a desperate journey to the far reaches of the galaxy. Their destination: the mysterious world of Yrnameer, the very last of the your-name-heres—planets without corporate sponsors. But little does Cole know that this legendary utopia is home to a murderous band of outlaws bent on destroying the planet's tiny, peaceful community.Follow Cole's adventures through a delightfully absurd science-fiction universe, where the artificial intelligence is stupid, dust motes carry branding messages, and middle-management zombies have overrun a corporate training satellite. In the spirit of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, The Sheriff of Yrnameer is sci-fi comedy at its best—mordant, raucously funny, and a thrilling page-turner.