Crucial Confrontations: Tools for Resolving Broken Promises, Violated Expectations, and Bad Behavior
Kerry Patterson - 2004
Others have broken rules, missed deadlines, failed to live up to commitments, or just plain behaved badly—and nobody steps up to the issue. Or they do, but do a lousy job and create a whole new set of problems. Accountability suffers and new problems spring up. New research demonstrates that these disappointments aren't just irritating, they're costly—sapping organizational performance by twenty to fifty percent and accounting for up to ninety percent of divorces.Crucial Confrontations teaches skills drawn from 10,000 hours of real-life observations to increase confidence in facing issues like:- An employee speaks to you in an insulting tone that crosses the line between sarcasm and insubordination. Now what?- Your boss just committed you to a deadline you know you can't meet—and not-so-subtly hinted he doesn't want to hear complaints about it.- Your son walks through the door sporting colorful new body art that raises your blood pressure by forty points. Speak now, pay later.- An accountant wonders how to step up to a client who is violating the law. Can you spell unemployment?- Family members fret over how to tell granddad that he should no longer drive his car. This is going to get ugly.- A nurse worries about what to say to an abusive physician. She quickly remembers "how things work around here" and decides not to say anything.Everyone knows how to run for cover, or if adequately provoked, step up to these confrontations in a way that causes a real ruckus. That we have down pat. Crucial Confrontations teaches you how to deal with violated expectations in a way that solves the problem at hand, and doesn't harm the relationship—and in fact, even strengthens it.Crucial Confrontations borrows from twenty years of research involving two groups. More than 25,000 people helped the authors identify those who were most influential during crucial confrontations. They spent 10,000 hours watching these people, documented what they saw, and then trained and tested with more than 300,000 people. Second, they measured the impact of crucial confrontations improvements on organizational and team performance—the results were immediate and sustainable: twenty to fifty percent improvements in measurable performance.
Relational Intelligence: The People Skills You Need for the Life of Purpose You Want
Dharius Daniels - 2020
Using Jesus's relational framework for choosing the twelve disciples, this book gives you the tools you need to define, discern, align, assess, and activate your relationships to unlock your greatest potential. Years of ministry leadership experience have taught Dr. Dharius Daniels that there's no such thing as a casual relationship. All of our relationships either push us forward into our God-given purposes or hold us back from who we're meant to be. If you're serious about taking your life to the next level, you should be serious about taking your relationships to the next level, too.Scripture gives us a blueprint for the way relationships should be managed, and this blueprint helps us construct and grow relationships that are fruitful. It tells us that our spiritual, physical, financial, emotional, and professional progress is greatly impacted by who we allow to be a part of our lives and what part we allow them to play. Relational Intelligence reminds us that with our destiny on the line, relationships are too consequential to nonchalantly roll the dice in managing them.Daniels shows us that relationships were part of God's design, and when we understand and apply what God has to say about them, we can finally learn to:Reflect on the people that God has placed in our livesAvoid unnecessary relational turmoilBe intentional in each of our relationshipsAccomplish our God-given purposeWhen your purpose is on the line, the cost of relational unintelligence is too great to pay. Join Daniels as you uncover the secret to gaining the relational intelligence you need to build the purposeful life that you want.
You Say More Than You Think: Use the New Body Language to Get What You Want!, The 7-Day Plan
Janine Driver - 2010
Unfortunately, most of what you’ve heard from other body language experts is wrong, and, as a result, your actions may be hurting, not helping, you. With sass and a keen eye, media favorite Janine Driver teaches you the skills she used every day to stay alive during her fifteen years as a body-language expert at the ATF. Janine’s 7-day plan and her 7-second solutions teach you dozens of body language fixes to turn any interpersonal situation to your advantage. She reveals methods here that other experts refuse to share with the public, and she debunks major myths other experts swear are fact: Giving more eye contact is key when you’re trying to impress someone. Not necessarily true. It’s actually more important where you point your belly button. This small body shift communicates true interest more powerfully than constant eye contact.The “steeple” hand gesture will give you the upper hand during negotiations and business meetings. Wrong. Driver has seen this overbearing gesture backfire more often than not. Instead, she suggests two new steeples that give you power without making you seem overly aggressive: the Basketball Steeple and the A-OK Two-Fingered Steeple. Happy people command power and attention by smiling just before they meet new people. Studies have shown that people who do this are viewed as Beta Leaders. Alpha leaders smile once they shake your hand and hear your name. At a time when every advantage counts—and first impressions matter more than ever—this is the book to help you really get your message across.
What Every Body is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's Guide to Speed-Reading People
Joe Navarro - 2008
Is it?She says she agrees. Does she?The interview went great - or did it?He said he'd never do it again. But he did.Read this book and send your nonverbal intelligence soaring. Joe Navarro, a former FBI counterintelligence officer and a recognized expert on nonverbal behavior, explains how to "speed-read" people: decode sentiments and behaviors, avoid hidden pitfalls, and look for deceptive behaviors. You'll also learn how your body language can influence what your boss, family, friends, and strangers think of you. You will discover:The ancient survival instincts that drive body languageWhy the face is the least likely place to gauge a person's true feelingsWhat thumbs, feet, and eyelids reveal about moods and motivesThe most powerful behaviors that reveal our confidence and true sentimentsSimple nonverbals that instantly establish trustSimple nonverbals that instantly communicate authorityFilled with examples from Navarro's professional experience, this definitive book offers a powerful new way to navigate your world.
How to Work Without Losing Your Mind
Cate Sevilla - 2021
Cate Sevilla is insightful, inventive and so supportive' Viv Groskop 'Entertaining and practical; moving and funny and, most importantly, a helping hand from someone who's been through it' Emma Gannon, Sunday Times bestselling author 'A timely and provocative book that is at once empathetic about the challenges work presents and empowering on how to overcome them' Bruce Daisley, author of The Joy of Work Bosses are maddening. Colleagues are profoundly irritating. And balancing family and work is daunting. So how do we balance success with sanity? How do we progress without burning out? Whether you're drowning in a toxic working environment, battling burnout, recovering from redundancy, or just struggling to figure out what you actually want from your career, Cate Sevilla is here to help coach you through the shittiness of your work day, and help you shift your relationship with your career.Having worked at giant corporations like Google (where her days consisted of aggressive bosses, complimentary pastries and lots of tears) and scrappy start-ups like The Pool (where she was Editor-in-Chief when it all went pear-shaped), Cate Sevilla has laboured through a lot of stressful and downright ridiculous work situations so that you don't have to. Drawing from lessons learned in her career and interviews with other women, How to Work Without Losing Your Mind is a relatable and reassuring guide to the messy, stressful and sometimes bizarre side of work that everyone experiences but no one talks about. It'll be your tonic after a long, hard working week, where you've ugly cried with your colleagues and are exhausted from endless video calls - and are wondering what the hell to do next.
Do Fly: Find Your Way. Make a Living. Be Your Best Self
Gavin Strange - 2016
Sounds simple, doesn't it? But the reality can be quite different. Whether you're just starting out or simply ready to head in a new direction, you're going to need some help turning your natural skills into success-seeking missiles of radness.On hand is Gavin Strange, a creative working by night under the name of JamFactory and, by day, at Aardman Animations – the Academy Award-winning studio behind Wallace & Gromit and Shaun the Sheep.With advice, encouragement and a reminder that life's too short to not pursue your passion, whatever your age or position – from school leaver or graduate just starting out to CEO ready to head in a new direction, Do Fly will inspire you to:Change your perspective and revamp your mindsetDevelop creative side projectsStay optimistic and resilientDiscover skills and passions you never knew you had!Do Fly is your all-in-one guide, ticket and passport to a new destination. Are you ready for take off?
Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself
Aziz Gazipura - 2017
In this controversial book, world-renowned confidence expert, Dr. Aziz Gazipura, takes an incisive look at the concept of nice. Through his typical style, Dr. Aziz uses engaging stories, humor, and disarming vulnerability to cut through the nice conditioning and liberate the most bold, expressive, authentic version of you. You'll discover how to: => Easily say "no" when you want to and need to. => Confidently and effectively ask for what you want. => Speak up more freely in all your relationships. => Eliminate feelings of guilt, anxiety, and worry about what others will think.
Rebounders: How Winners Pivot from Setback to Success
Rick Newman - 2012
But here’s the good news: Amazing success has been achieved by people who once fell flat on their faces. The secret lies in how we respond to life’s bumps and pot holes and unwelcome detours—from getting fired or losing a business to enduring a professional rejection or pursuing a passion that fails to pan out. Misfortune, it turns out, can be a springboard to success. In Rebounders, U.S. News & World Report journalist Rick Newman examines the rise and fall—and rise again—of some of our most prolific and productive figures in order to demystify the anatomy of resilience. He identifies nine key traits found in people who bounce back that can transform a setback into the first step toward great accomplishment. Newman turns many well-worn axioms on their head as he shows how virtually anybody can improve their resilience and get better at turning adversity into personal and professional achievement. • Setbacks can be a secret weapon: They often teach vital things you’ll never learn in school, on the job, or from others.• There are smart ways to fail: Once familiar with them, you’ll be more comfortable taking risks and less discouraged if they don’t pan out.• “Defensive pessimism” trumps optimism: Planning for what could go wrong is often the best way to ensure that it doesn’t.• Know when to quit: Walking away at the right time can free the resources you need to exploit better opportunities.• “Own the suck”: When faced with true hardship, taking command of the pain and sorrow—rather than letting it command you—lays the groundwork for ultimately rising above it. Each lesson is highlighted by candid and inspiring stories from notable people, including musician Lucinda Williams, tennis champ James Blake, inventor Thomas Edison, army veteran and double-amputee Tammy Duckworth, and Joe Torre, former manager of the New York Yankees. In this uncertain and unstable time, Rebounders lays out the new rules for success and equips you with the tools you need to get ahead and thrive.
The Art of Seduction
Robert Greene - 2001
Now Greene has once again mined history and literature to distill the essence of seduction, the most highly refined mode of influence, the ultimate power trip. The Art of Seduction is a masterful synthesis of the work of thinkers such as Freud, Ovid, Kierkegaard, and Einstein, as well as the achievements of the greatest seducers throughout history. From Cleopatra to John F. Kennedy, from Andy Warhol to Josephine Bonaparte, The Art of Seduction gets to the heart of the character of the seducer and his or her tactics, triumphs and failures. The seducer's many faces include: the Siren, the Rake, the Ideal Lover, the Dandy, the Natural, the Coquette, the Charmer, and the Charismatic. Twenty-four maneuvers will guide readers through the seduction process, providing cunning, amoral instructions for and analysis of this fascinating, all-pervasive form of power. Just as beautifully packaged and every bit as essential as The 48 Laws of Power, The Art of Seduction is an indispensable primer of persuasion and offers the best lessons on how to take what you want from whomever you want or how to prevent yourself from being taken.
Verbal Judo: The Gentle Art of Persuasion
George J. Thompson - 1993
Listen and speak more effectively, engage people through empathy (the most powerful word in the English language), avoid the most common conversational disasters, and use proven strategies that allow you to successfully communicate your point of view and take the upper hand in most disputes.
Conversationally Speaking: Tested New Ways to Increase Your Personal and Social Effectiveness
Alan Garner - 1980
More than a million people have learned the secrets of effective conversation using Conversationally Speaking. This revised edition provides more ways to improve conversational skills by asking questions that promote conversation, learning how to listen so that others will be encouraged to talk, reducing anxiety in social situations and more.Alan Garner, MA, is a nationally known communications consultant and a longtime teacher. He has taught hundreds of "Conversationally Speaking" workshops and over 5 million copies of his books have been sold worldwide. This book teaches simple skills for doing well socially in everyday language, which is why it has been popular in its various editions for 37 years and has sold almost 1 million copies.Toastmaster Magazine writes: "'Conversationally Speaking' is the classic how-to book in social communication."Carolyn Hax, a columnist for the "Washington Post" whose work appears in 200 newpapers, wrote: "Alan Garner is brilliant at teaching social skills to those who need or want to start at the beginning- who feel they somehow missed out on life classes that everyone else got to attend.""Conversationally Speaking" is recommended by hundreds of therapists for people who want better relationships. These include Dr. Albert Ellis, the founder of the Rational Emotive School of Psychology, who called this book: "An exceptionally clear, highly effective book on conversational skills that uniquely includes a very sensible and useful section on rational thinking."Aaron Beck, MD, University Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Pennsylvania wrote: "'Conversationally Speaking' is of great value for people who want to sharpen their skills in interpersonal relations. I routinely recommend it."
Before Happiness: How Creating a Positive Reality First Amplifies Your Levels of Happiness and Success
Shawn Achor - 2013
This book is about what comes before both. Because before we can be happy or successful, we need to first develop the ability to see that positive change is possible. Only once we learn to see the world through a more positive lens can we summon all our motivation, emotion, and intelligence to achieve our personal and professional goals.In Before Happiness, Achor reveals five actionable, proven strategies for changing our lens to positive:· The Most Valuable Reality: See a broader range of ideas and solutions by changing the details on which your brain chooses to focus · Success Mapping: Set goals oriented around the things in life that matter to you most, whether career advancement or family or making a difference in the world· The X-spot: Use success accelerants to propel you more quickly towards those goals, whether finishing a marathon, reaching a sales target, learning a language, or losing 10 pounds· Noise-Canceling: Boost the signal pointing you to opportunities and possibilities that others miss · Positive Inception: Transfer these skills to your team, your employees, and everyone around you By mastering these strategies, you’ll create an renewable source of positivity, motivation, and engagement that will allow you to reach your fullest potential in everything you do.
Factfulness: Ten Reasons We're Wrong About the World – and Why Things Are Better Than You Think
Hans Rosling - 2018
So wrong that a chimpanzee choosing answers at random will consistently outguess teachers, journalists, Nobel laureates, and investment bankers.In Factfulness, Professor of International Health and global TED phenomenon Hans Rosling, together with his two long-time collaborators, Anna and Ola, offers a radical new explanation of why this happens. They reveal the ten instincts that distort our perspective—from our tendency to divide the world into two camps (usually some version of us and them) to the way we consume media (where fear rules) to how we perceive progress (believing that most things are getting worse).Our problem is that we don’t know what we don’t know, and even our guesses are informed by unconscious and predictable biases.It turns out that the world, for all its imperfections, is in a much better state than we might think. That doesn’t mean there aren’t real concerns. But when we worry about everything all the time instead of embracing a worldview based on facts, we can lose our ability to focus on the things that threaten us most.Inspiring and revelatory, filled with lively anecdotes and moving stories, Factfulness is an urgent and essential book that will change the way you see the world and empower you to respond to the crises and opportunities of the future.
In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People
George K. Simon Jr. - 1996
"This book clearly illustrates the true nature of disturbed characters, exposes the tactics the most manipulative characters use to pull the wool over the eyes of others, and outlines powerful, practical ways to deal more effectively with manipulative people."
How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends: Revised and Updated
Don Gabor - 1983
This revised and updated edition offers easy time-tested ways to improve anybody's ability to communicate in business and social situations, either in person or in cyberspace.