This witty and charming collection of ten short fantasies includes a story, set in the Enchanted Forest, about Queen Cimorene's Frying Pan of Doom; a zany yarn about a magical blue chipmunk with a passion for chestnuts; and an eerie tale of a caliph who turns his vizier's daughter into a wolf.

    All are sure to provide thrills and chills but are best read with the lights on.

    Also useful for its exploration of the crossover genre known as "dark fantasy." Noteworthy authors include Peter S. Beagle, Ursula Le Guin, Stephen King, Lucy Taylor, Steve Rasnic Tem, Tanith Lee, A. S. Byatt, David J. Schow, and Joyce Carol Oates.Contents: * Summation 1995: Fantasy by Terri Windling * Summation 1995: Horror by Ellen Datlow * Horror and Fantasy in the Media: 1995 by Edward Bryant * Obituaries by James Frenkel * Home for Christmas by Nina Kiriki Hoffman * Heartfires by Charles de Lint * Screens by Terry Lamsley * King of Crows by Midori Snyder * Professor Gottesman and the Indian Rhinoceros by Peter S. Beagle * The Hunt of the Unicorn by Ellen Kushner * More Tomorrow by Michael Marshall Smith * Penguins for Lunch by Scott Bradfield * Either, OR by Ursula K. Le Guin * Paper Lantern by Stuart Dybek * Lunch at the Gotham Café by Stephen King * Queen of Knives (poem) by Neil Gaiman * Dragon-Rain by Eileen Kernaghan * Llantos de La Llorona: Warnings from the Wailer (poem) by Pat Mora * Too Short a Death by Peter Crowther * The James Dean Garage Band by Rick Moody * Because of Dust by Christopher Kenworthy * Loop by Douglas E. Winter * La Loma, La Luna by Sue Kepros Hartman * Women's Stories (poem) by Jane Yolen * Swan/Princess (poem) by Jane Yolen * Switch by Lucy Taylor * Scaring the Train by Terry Dowling * Blood Knot by Steve Resnic Tem * The Girl Who Married the Reindeer (poem) by Eilean Ni Chuilleanain * The Otter Woman (poem) by Mary O'Malley * Resolve and Resistance by S.N. Dyer * La Dame by Tanith Lee * Circe's Power (poem) by Louise Glück * Dragon's Fin Soup by S.P. Somtow * The Granddaughter by Vivian vande Velde * Daphne and Laura and So Forth (poem) by Margaret Atwood * A Lamia in the Cevennes by A.S. Byatt * The Guilty Party by Susan Moody * She's Not There by Pat Cadigan * The White Road (poem) by Neil Gaiman * Refrigerator Heaven by David J. Schow * After the Elephant Ballet by Gary A. Braunbeck * Henry V, Part 2 by Marcia Guthridge * Mrs. Greasy by Robert Reed * ############## by Joyce Carol Oates * The Printer's Daughter by Delia Sherman * Prayer (poem) by Nancy Willard * Jacob and the Angel (poem) by Jane Yolen * The Lion and the Lark by Patricia A. McKillip * Honorable Mentions: 1995Edited by Terry Windling and Ellen Datlow.

    This is storytelling at its funniest.If laughter is the best medicine, then this book is your prescription. Turn off the news and spend a few days not following current events. Instead, return to the basics—humanity’s ability to laugh at itself. Maybe you should even do a news cleanse for a few days! Hide under the covers and read these stories instead. Or read a chapter a day, or a story a day for 101 days. These pages contain the antidote to whatever is troubling you. They will definitely put you in a good mood. No one is safe from our writers— from spouses to parents to children to colleagues and friends. And of course the funniest of all are the stories they tell about their own mishaps and those “most embarrassing moments.” There’s no holding anything back in these pages, so prepare for lots of good, clean (and not so clean) fun.

    The struggle is real. Anyone who is a cat lover knows that the cat rules the roost, and that certainly doesn’t change at bedtime. You might be ready to sleep, but you can bet that kitty is ready for just about anything but some shut-eye. Release your frustrations with a good laugh as you read along with Rosa and her struggle to get her cat to Stop Meowing and Go the F*ck to Sleep! Stop Meowing and Go the F*ck to Sleep is a funny bedtime book for all the desperate cat parents out there. If you have experienced the nightmare of having a kitty who won’t let you have a good night’s sleep, this is the book for you. It’s the perfect gift for crazy cat lovers who appreciate hilarious insights into the feline nature.

    Now we’re taking it to the next level with an anthology of original short stories from some of the wittiest women writers we know—stories they would only tell their closest friends, most likely from within the haven of a ladies’ room. Inside you’ll find 39 (mostly) true tales by women, for women, about being women—bodily changes, relationships, careers, motherhood, aging, illness, and more—written with the humor and grit that proudly sets In The Powder Room apart.But be forewarned: we’re holding nothing back. We’re revealing our deep dark secrets—because it’s through our most vulnerable and honest moments that we forge the strongest connections and discover we aren’t so alone after all. You have a gimpy boob? Me too. You think glitter is the herpes of the craft world? Me too! You got your fishnet-clad leg stuck to your head on stage in front of thousands of people? Wait…what? OMG. Tell me everything! We are your friends, sisters, mothers, and daughters. Regardless of what life has dished up for you, chances are, we’ve been there and we can relate. We’ll help you laugh it off, or hold your hand until you’re ready to laugh again. And we promise: we’ll always tell you when you have lipstick on your teeth.

    This book collects some of the best funny fantasy fiction published in the past decade. Included are works by Hugo and Nebula Award winners, New York Times and USA Today bestselling authors, as well as up-and-coming talented writers.Includes the following stories:“Dave the Mighty Steel-Thewed Avenger” by Laura Resnick“Crumbs” by Esther Friesner“Fellow Traveler” by Donald J. Bingle“A Fish Story” by Sarah Totton“Another End of the Empire” by Tim Pratt“Giantkiller” by G. Scott Huggins“A Mild Case of Death” by David Gerrold“Fairy Debt” by Gail Carriger“A Very Special Girl” by Mike Resnick“The Blue Corpse Corps” by Jim C. Hines“Librarians in the Branch Library of Babel” by Shaenon K. Garrity“The Queens Reason” by Richard Parks“The Best Little Cleaning Robot in All of Faerie” by Susan Jane Bigelow“Suede This Time” by Jean Rabe

    But I wrote a lot of good poems.”So maintains Anita Liberty, the caustically funny New York City performance artist who was going along happily healing her hurt by hating and humiliating her detestable ex-boyfriend on stage and in print until the unthinkable happened: she had a good date. And one good date deserves another. And another. And another. And, all of the sudden, Anita Liberty finds herself in a predicament. Getting dumped launched Anita’s career–Will falling in love finish it? Who’s more important: her devoted audience or her newly devoted boyfriend? And on top of everything, Hollywood won’t stop calling and Anita can’t figure out if It wants a serious commitment or just a little bit of no-strings-attached fun. From digging mercilessly into the minutiae of her new relationship to dramatically torching every professional bridge she crosses in L.A., Anita refuses to let a big load of bliss get dumped right in the middle of her career path.“He said that my work was amazing and hilarious and smart and that he can’t wait to see me perform.So I had sex with him.”“My boyfriend asked me to change my look.To something other than contemptuous.”{BARGAIN} Whatever Hollywood ends up paying me for the rights to the story of my life.“It’s easier to go back to fantasizing about perfection . . .than to accept that perfection is just a fantasy.”“Boyfriend thinks I’d rather be right than happy.Boyfriend’s right.But I’m not telling him that.”Through blog entries, film scenes, poems, and to-do lists, Anita Liberty documents the perils and pitfalls of dating, sex, relationships, artistic success, and the kind of true love that sucks the creative life out of you to the point where you just end up staring at a blank computer screen and thinking gooey thoughts about your new boyfriend even though you should be writing.

    Included are: Introduction (The Second Cthulhu Mythos Megapack) • essay by Shawn Garrett Dreams of Yith • (1934) • poem by Duane W. Rimel and H. P. Lovecraft Out of the Aeons • short fiction by Hazel Heald and H. P. Lovecraft (variant of Out of the Eons 1935) Fishhead • (1913) • short story by Irvin S. Cobb When Chaugnar Wakes • (1932) • poem by Frank Belknap Long The Mound • (1940) • novella by H. P. Lovecraft and Zealia Bishop The Thing on the Roof • (1932) • short story by Robert E. Howard The Isle of Dark Magic • (1934) • novelette by Hugh B. Cave The Secret in the Tomb • (1935) • short story by Robert Bloch The Horror from the Hills • (1931) • novella by Frank Belknap Long The Terrible Parchment • (1937) • short story by Manly Wade Wellman The Shambler from the Stars • (1935) • short story by Robert Bloch The Diary of Alonzo Typer • (1938) • short story by H. P. Lovecraft and William Lumley Hydra• (1939) • short story by Henry Kuttner The Suicide in the Study • (1935) • short story by Robert Bloch Marmok • (1940) • poem by Emil Petaja The Intruder • (1940) • short story by Emil Petaja Out of the Jar • (1941) • short story by Charles R. Tanner [as by Charles A. Tanner] Skydrift • (1949) • short story by Emil Petaja Anonymous • (1951) • short story by George T. Wetzel Why Abdul Alhazred Went Mad • (1950) • short story by D. R. Smith (variant of Why Abdul Al Hazred Went Mad) Caer Sidhi • (1954) • short story by George T. Wetzel Dead of Night • (1988) • short story by Lin Carter Death of a Damned Good Man • (1991) • short story by Avram Davidson Medusa's Coil • short fiction by Zealia Bishop and H. P. Lovecraft [as by Howard Phillips Lovecraft and Zealia Bishop] Perchance to Dream • (1988) • short story by Lin Carter The Winfield Heritence • short fiction by Lin Carter (variant of The Winfield Heritance 1981) The Challenge from Beyond • (1935) • short story by C. L. Moore and A. Merritt and H. P. Lovecraft and Robert E. Howard and Frank Belknap Long The Last Horror Out of Arkham • (1977) • short story by Darrell Schweitzer If you enjoy this ebook, don't forget to search your favorite ebook store for "Wildside Press Megapack" to see more of the 300+ volumes in this series, covering adventure, historical fiction, mysteries, westerns, ghost stories, science fiction -- and much, much more!

    It’s all right here in these words. Everything you ever need to know. That’s because I use all twenty-six letters, and you can make anything out of those twenty-six letters. So, you see, this book encompasses everything." — PleaseHelpMeRumored to be penned by the brother of the best-selling author of “I Wrote This For You,” this new tour de force in poetry is sure to stab at your heart, or, at least, make you want to.If you loved the international best-selling collection of poetry, “I Wrote This For You,” you’ll probably hate this. But even those admirers of the free-verse artistry of that work will get a laugh from this classic parody. Author and screenwriter Edward Savio put together a spot-on send up of the poetry best-seller with “I Wrote This Crap For You.”It’s a quick, fun read that we hope you enjoy.“It touched my heart and moved me to tears.”“It’s as if he knew my inner thoughts and fears, and—come to think of it my diary is missing.”

    In a myriad of commonplace activities, he finds the presence of the divine, and he elegantly describes these persons, events, and observations, nimbly transporting readers into these realities. With his masterly crafted prose, Buechner edifies, inspires, and offers a timeless model for approaching our human experience.

    With the help of the entire creative collective, Gordon-Levitt culled, edited and curated over 8,500 contributions into this finely tuned collection of original art from 67 contributors. Reminiscent of the 6-Word Memoir series, The Tiny Book of Tiny Stories: Volume 1 brings together art and voices from around the world to unite and tell stories that defy size.

    In his screenplays and short stories, Ethan Coen surprises and delights us with a rich brew of ideas, observations, and perceptions. In his first collection of poems he does much the same. The range of his poems is remarkable–funny, ribald, provocative, sometimes raw, and often touching and profound.In these poems Coen writes of his childhood, his hopes and dreams, his disappointments, his career in Hollywood, his physically demanding love affair with Mamie Eisenhower, and his decade-long battle with amphetamines that produced some of the lengthier poems in the collection. You will chuckle, nodding with recognition as you turn the pages, perhaps even stopping occasionally to read a poem. Handsomely and durably bound between hard covers, this is a book that will stand up to most readers’ attempts to destroy it.

    Here are 25 stories (plus a bonus interview with best-selling author George R.R. Martin) by some of the field's greatest authors. Included are:THE TRUE DARKNESS, by Pamela SargentPERMANENT FATAL ERRORS, by Jay LakeADJUSTMENT TEAM, by Philip K. DickROBOTS DON’T CRY, by Mike ResnickNO GREAT MAGIC, by Fritz LeiberESCAPE HATCH, by Brenda W. CloughBACKLASH, by Winston K. MarksTHE PICK-UP, by Lawrence Watt-EvansPOPULATION IMPLOSION, by Andrew J. OffuttWAY DOWN EAST, by Tim SullivanTHROUGH TIME AND SPACE WITH FERDINAND FEGHOOT: 28, by Grendel BriartonTO INVADE NEW YORK, by Irwin LewisTHEY WERE THE WIND, by C.J. HendersonSTOPOVER, by William GerkenCONSEQUENCES OF STEAM, by Michael HemmingsonOUTSIDE LOOKING IN, by Mark E. BurgessDEAD WORLD, by Jack DouglasNEFERTITI'S TENTH LIFE, by Mary A. TurzilloQUICKSILVER, by Lonni LeesAFTER ALL, by Robert ReginaldTHE BARBARIANS, by Algis BudrysEX MACHINA, by Cynthia WardMONKEY ON HIS BACK, by Charles V. De VetTHE SURVIVORS, by Tom GodwinTHROUGH TIME AND SPACE WITH FERDINAND FEGHOOT: 99, by Grendel BriartonSPEAKING WITH GEORGE R.R. MARTIN: Interview conducted by Darrell SchweitzerAnd don't forget to search this ebook store for "Wildside Megapack" to see more entries in this series, covering classic authors and subjects like mysteries, science fiction, westerns, ghost stories -- and much, much more!

    Rather than enjoy some drinks in front of a warm fire with her friends, contracted Slayer Clementine Johanssen has her horse saddled and weapons packed to head out into the hills and hunt down some deadly scallywags—alone. When her friends catch wind of her intentions, they set out to waylay her long enough to change her way of thinking … in spite of her mule-headedness.Reminiscent of Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, this catawampus tale will add a heartening dose of fun and camaraderie to your holiday!Note: This is book 3.5 of the Deadwood Undertaker Series*(Merriam-Webster Dictionary)