The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse


Debbie Mirza - 2017
    When most people think of a narcissist they think of someone who is grandiose, obviously self-absorbed, sees themself as superior to others, and throws fits of rage when they don’t get their way. But what if the narcissist is one of the nicest people you’ve ever met? What if they are a great listener, seem to care about others, and are a pillar of the community? What if they are the mother that volunteers at the school, the husband that your girlfriends wish they had, the boss that your co-workers feel so lucky to work for? A covert narcissist has the same traits as the well-known overt type. The difference is when they control and manipulate, when they demean and devalue you it is done is such a subtle way you don’t notice it. Many people can have a parent who is a covert narcissist and not realize it until well into their adulthood. Most people who are married to this type can be with this person for decades, not even recognizing the tactics that have been used on them for years. Others have experienced a boss or co-worker that have taken years of their life and drained them of their energy and self-worth, bringing them to a place where they question their own sanity. There are no visible scars with this form of abuse and you are usually the only one that experiences their destructive and psychologically debilitating behavior. The most common description a survivor of this type of abuse will use is crazy making. If you have experienced or are in a relationship with a covert narcissist this book will help you see that you are not crazy. The author thoroughly explains and illustrates through real life stories what the traits of a covert narcissist are and look like. Your feelings and hunches will be validated and you will finally be able to see clearly and know how to heal after years of confusion. Living with a covert narcissist drains your spirit and leaves you questioning your own reality. You have been lied to for years and it is time to finally see the truth of what you have been through, who you really are, and how much you deserve love and happiness.

When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along


Joshua Coleman - 2007
    Such rifts can cause unspeakable sorrow that parents too often must bear alone. Psychologist and parent Joshua Coleman, Ph.D., offers insight, empathy, and perspective to those who have lost the opportunity to be the parent they desperately wanted to be and who are mourning the loss of a harmonious relationship with their child. Through case examples and healing exercises, Dr. Coleman helps parents:Reduce anger, guilt, and shameLearn how temperament, the teen years, their own or a partner's mistakes, and divorce can strain the parent-child bondCome to terms with their own and their child's imperfectionsMaintain self-esteem through difficult timesDevelop strategies for rebuilding the relationship or move toward acceptance of what can't be changedUnderstand how society's high expectations of parents contribute to the risk of parental woundsBy helping parents recognize what they can do, and let go of what they cannot, Dr. Coleman helps families develop more positive ways of healing themselves and relating to each other.

The Journey: A Roadmap for Self-healing After Narcissistic Abuse


Meredith Miller - 2017
    Invisible abuse is rarely talked about because of how hard it is to pin-point, even by mental health professionals. Fortunately, there is a growing wealth of information available, particularly around the term narcissistic abuse. After discovering the keywords and digging for answers, the next step is what to do about it now. It’s important to understand that leaving the abusive person and educating yourself about the abuse is not the same as healing. This discovery is the actually start of the journey of self-healing after narcissistic abuse. THE JOURNEY is a roadmap out of the suffering and struggle after narcissistic abuse. It is a comprehensive, holistic outline of the recovery process so you can measure where you are and where you want to go in the journey of self-healing. If you want to change anything in life, you’re going to need to measure it somehow. This structure will help you get to the next level and keep moving forward out of the gravity of the past so you can create a life of peace, joy, meaning and purpose.

The Intimacy Struggle: Revised and Expanded for All Adults


Janet Geringer Woititz - 1993
    It goes on for all of us as long as we live. To be intimate is to be close, to be vulnerable, qualities that are very different from the survival skills we learned. This book will help clarify the issues for you.You can learn to:Identify family myths to make you wonder whether having a healthy, intimate relationship is possible.Know the questions to ask to find out whether you and your partner have a long-term future together.Be aware of misunderstandings that can sabotage your relationship.Express your feelings and fears so as to avoid misunderstandings.Find our what to do when your relationship is not working.Create good relationships.Acquiring intimacy skills can be difficult, but through understanding and effort, they can be learned. This insightful book is a good place to begin.

The Dance of Fear: Rising Above Anxiety, Fear, and Shame to Be Your Best and Bravest Self


Harriet Lerner - 2004
    They are the uninvited guests in our lives. When tragedy or hardship hits, they may become our constant companions.Anxiety can wash over us like a tidal wave or operate as a silent thrum under the surface of our daily lives. With stories that are sometimes hilarious and sometimes heartbreaking, Lerner takes us from "fear lite" to the most difficult lessons the universe sends us. We learn:how a man was "cured in a day" of the fear of rejection -- and what we can learn from his storyhow the author overcame her dread of public speaking when her worst fears were realizedhow to deal with the fear of not being good enough, and with the shame of feeling essentially flawed and inadequatehow to stay calm and clear in an anxious, crazy workplacehow to manage fear and despair when life sends a crash course in illness, vulnerability, and losshow "positive thinking" helps -- and harmshow to be our best and bravest selves, even when we are terrified and have internalized the shaming messages of othersNo one signs up for anxiety, fear, and shame, but we can’t avoid them either. As we learn to respond to these three key emotions in new ways, we can live more fully in the present and move into the future with courage, clarity, humor, and hope. Fear and Other Uninvited Guests shows us how.

Affirmations for the Inner Child


Rokelle Lerner - 1990
    As children, these powerful messages helped us to know that we were worthwhile, that it was all right to want food and to be touched, and that our very existence was a precious gift. The messages that we received from our parents helped us to form decisions that determined the course of our lives. If we were raised with consistent, nurturing parents, we conclude that life is meaningful and that people are to be trusted. If we were raised with parents who were addictively or compulsively ill, we determine that life is threatening and chaotic--that we are not deserving of joy. These are the crucial decisions that impact our lives long after we have forgotten them. Unfortunately, childhood judgments don't disappear. They remain as dynamic forces that contaminate our adulthood. When childhood needs are not taken care of because of abuse or abandonment, we spend our lives viewing the world through the distorted perception of a needy infant or an angry adolescent. The more we push these child parts away, the more control they have over us. This collection of daily meditations is dedicated to those adults who are ready to heal their childhood wounds. It is through this courageous effort that we will move from a life of pain into recovery.

Skin Picking: The Freedom to Finally Stop


Annette Pasternak - 2014
    Step-by-step she leads you through: 1) Exercises to help you to break the habit of the behavior. 2) Techniques to reduce stress and anxiety naturally, thus reducing the body’s need to pick. 3) How to release negative thoughts and emotions holding you back.4) Lifestyle changes to restore physiological balance, including which foods to avoid, which to eat more of, and natural supplements to help you stop. This comprehensive guide is a lifesaver for those suffering from skin picking, and is invaluable also for health professionals interested in learning how to help their patients who pick.

Coping With Grief


Mal McKissock - 1996
    It reassures people that their responses which may seem frightening and painful are an integral part of this difficult time but can become manageable with compassionate support and the right information. This valuable aid helps the grieving understand their emotions and enables friends and family to offer support and comfort where and when it is most needed.

Bipolar Disorder: The Ultimate Guide


Sarah Owen - 2008
    If you, or a friend or family member, is diagnosed with Bipolar, or if you suspect that someone you know may have Bipolar, this book is a fantastic first port of call for advice and support. Written in an extremely helpful question and answer format, this comprehensive and compassionate guide draws on a broad range of expert opinion, the very latest research, and personal experience to explore and explain everything that someone who has bipolar, friend, relative or carer might want to know about Bipolar Disorder. Including numerous real-life case studies and a full list of support organisations and internet resources around the world, this handy blend of advice and insight will answer all your questions, from how to recognise the symptoms to how to explain to a child that their parent has been diagnosed.

Shacking Up: The Smart Girl's Guide to Living in Sin Without Getting Burned


Stacy Whitman - 2003
    While living together can be an exciting way to take your relationship to the next level, it can also present a host of new questions and challenges. With its fresh, girlfriend-to-girlfriend manner, Shacking Up walks you through every step of the cohabitation process, from making the initial decision to breaking up or getting married. Beginning with a readiness quiz to help you decide if you and your honey are prepared to take the plunge, authors Stacy and Wynne Whitman provide a wealth of hands-on advice from lawyers, psychologists and financial planners as well as entertaining, true-life stories from couples with shacking up experience. Topics include: breaking the news to your family; managing and merging your finances; protecting yourself legally; real-estate decisions; and day-to-day dilemmas such as chores, privacy, and keeping the spark alive. Whether you opt for wedding bells or decide he’s not the one for you, Shacking Up is a stylish, empowering handbook for staying smart, savvy, and true to yourself along the road to happily ever after.

Changes That Heal: The Four Shifts That Make Everything Better…And That Anyone Can Do


Henry Cloud - 1992
    This book focuses on four developmental tasks -- bonding to others, separating from others, integrating good and bad in our lives, and taking charge of our lives -- that all of us must accomplish to heal our inner pain and enable us to function and grow emotionally and spiritually.

Adult Children: The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families


John C. Friel - 1988
    But what about the rest of us? What about families that had no alcoholism, but did have perfectionism, workaholism, compulsive overeating, intimacy problems, depression, problems in expressing feelings, plus all the other personality traits that can produce a family system much like an alcoholic one?Countless millions of us struggle with these kinds of dysfunctions every day, and until very recently we struggled alone. Pulling together both theory and clinical practice, John and Linda Friel provide a readable explanation of what happened to us and how we can rectify it.

Unmasking Narcissism: A Guide to Understanding the Narcissist in Your Life


Mark Ettensohn - 2016
     In this groundbreaking guide from clinical psychologist Mark Ettensohn, PsyD., you will gain insight into narcissistic behaviors, symptoms, and relationship dynamics. Dr. Ettensohn provides exercises designed to help you clarify your own values and goals for the relationship, whether that means immediate separation or long-term relationship management. Anyone whose life has been touched by narcissism will find this book helpful - whether you are coming to terms with a loved one's diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality disorder (NPD), or working to move forward after leaving a narcissistic relationship. Unmasking Narcissism provides strategies and coping styles that will guide you toward a deeper understanding of both the narcissist and yourself, with: Easy-to-read sections aligned with the DSM-5 criteria for Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Explanations of both grandiose (overt) and vulnerable (covert) narcissism. Healing tools and techniques, including how to defuse arguments instead of fuel them, mindfulness meditation, and exploring vulnerability. Real-world stories of people coping with narcissists. Throughout, Unmasking Narcissism offers a fully realized, yet compassionate portrait of narcissism that will help you on your path to healing without compromising your own mental health and wellness.

Emotional Abuse: Silent Killer of Marriage - A 30 Year Abuser Speaks Out


Austin F. James - 2013
    Experience the awakening that hurled him through a nightmarish journey to the most inner core of his soul. Burrow inside an emotional abuser's head and find out why: he is so charming one minute and a raging manic the next - he blames you for everything - he belittles your feelings, opinions, or your accomplishments - he never seems to support you - he cuts you down in front of friends and family - he causes you to walk on eggshells - he is so angry so much of the time - he can't admit when he is wrong. Discover what Austin learned during his five years of recovery, along with the horror, that his three decade abusive lifestyle stemmed from events that happened as a young teenager, following the unexpected death of his father. Through great sorrow, came the ability to be transformed from the ashes of defeat to the type of cleansing and healing that not only renewed Austin's spirit, but allowed it to soar to new heights.The book answers the questions: how can a too-close relationship with mom affects him - what type of counseling works and which to avoid - how to tell if your mate is really changing or if it's time to bail on the relationship. There are several chapters dedicated to breaking free from abuse and getting help. The book hopes to encourage people stuck as an abuser or as being abused that it is possible to break free from abuse.

The Little Book of Calm: Tame Your Anxieties, Face Your Fears, and Live Free (The Little Book of Series)


Aaron Balick - 2018
    From exercises to help you put your worries into perspective, to relaxation methods for when anxiety attacks, Dr Aaron Balick shows you how to feel more at ease and sustain a sense of calm