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    Instead, they land in French North Africa to fight the German Army for the first time. In the midst of the invasion, an M4 Sherman tank rolls into combat. It is manned by five men: John Austin, the commander; Anthony Russo, the driver; Charles Wade, the gunner; Amos Swanson, the loader; and Eugene Clay, the bow gunner. Cocky and confident in Allied victory, they expect the battle for North Africa to be a cakewalk. Soon, the Germans will teach them the harsh realities of armored warfare. To survive, they’ll have to show grit—and learn to work together.

    His book, You’re Not Helping… is a collection of short comedy articles that guide you through his delightful, inventive, and often nonsensical take on everything from attention-seeking dolphins to home invasions by the The Barenaked Ladies. You’re Not Helping… blends both humor and heart in what literary critics around the world are describing as “technically a book.” Join the 10s of readers worldwide enchanted by Ryan’s unique brand of wit.Ryan Patricks lives in San Francisco via Philadelphia. He is an aspiring comedy writer and once saw John Cusack at a Jamba Juice. You can follow him on Twitter @Ryan_Patricks or you can choose not to, it’s totally up to you.

    

    His love for Kylee grows everyday, thanks to nearly losing her after cheating with his ex, Zena. All is forgiven and Kylee and Karlos are married, with a baby on the way. But as fate will have it, someone resurfaces, with high hopes of ruining their marriage. Kimmora and Kevin are also married, with a beautiful baby boy named Keion. Kimmora has opened new chapters in her life such as becoming a wife, mother and registered nurse. Things are looking up for Kevin too, as he's running his thriving barbershop and working hard at being the best husband and father that he can be. All is well with the couple... That is, until skeletons fall out of the closet, putting their marriage in jeopardy. Twins Keira and Kelly are doing good in every area in their lives. Personal, financial, and career wise they have it all figured out. Their men, Kaylin and Kalvin, treat them like the queens that they are. But limits are tested and lines are crossed. Both couples are forced to fight not just each other but other situations that tries to tear them down as well. Come along for the ride as we see if being married to a Savage is all it’s cracked up to be.

    Combining Adam's inimitable comedic voice and four-color illustrations by his friend Michael Narren, Rich Man Poor Man is a hilariously accurate look at what the people born with silver spoons in their mouths have in common with the people whose only utensils are plastic sporks stolen from a Shakey's.

    It's OK." Over one hundred contributors share their failures, setbacks and most embarrassing moments for this compilation of hilarity with the hopes that their stories would give the embarrassed and struggling souls some comic and inspirational relief. Life is riddled with pain, disappointments, and failures, but given enough time, they're folly. "We're All A Mess. It's OK" captures life's most absurd moments honestly and without a filter. It's filled with funny essays and one-liners that highlight the grainier sides of being human and imperfect. The book covers everything from horrible internet dating experiences, the strangest of co-workers, vacations that went array, to the worst holiday gifts of all time. It's an anthology of real-life disasters. You'll enjoy comedian/actor Kim Banta's tale, "My First Date and a Sluggish Toilet," detailing a first date in the nicest home in town, ending with an overflowing toilet and panicked placement of poo into her purse. And... "You Must Have Me Confused With Someone Else" depicts Dane Levent's severe behavior problems with her golden retriever, Buddy, after picking him up from boarding, only to find out a week later that she had the wrong dog. And... "He's Worth the Wait" by Bes. D describes her mother-in-law's long-term relationship with a convicted felon she had met on Meet-An-Inmate.com. And... "Saying ‘I'm Sorry' Will Not Fix This Situation" by Ashley P. is a hilarious tale of turning her best date into her worst date by leaping onto her partner's lap, causing what is called in medical terminology, a penile fracture. And... Follow along with Traci Jo's daily embarrassment by her mother, picking her up from school wearing different wigs, such as Dorothy Hamill and Marilyn Monroe. And... Read an entire chapter dedicated to strange conditions, such as Shelley Miner Gardler's need to gather her pets before she goes to work to tell them goodbye and to assign one to be in charge while she's away. And... Discover why Christine T sorts M&Ms in ROYGBIV order and eats them first by frequency until they're even, and then one of each color in order, until they're gone. These humorous essays and quips are about the blunders and snafus, and of everyday life that most of us can relate to. It's like "Chicken Soup for the Soul" if you threw in snark and expletives. If you like Jenn Mann, Samantha Irby and Jenny Lawson, you will love "We're All A Mess. It's OK." Get a copy for your funniest friends, or for grouchy people, maybe it will cheer them up. The book is an easy read and offers a real message that we all can survive, even the worst of failures and ultimately, even though we're all a mess, it's OK. Snarky women, quip, short stories, essays, funny, humorous essays, humor essays, gifts for women, funny stories, dating, relationships, failures, work, family, cats, dogs, alpacas.

    Unfortunately they have no real resources, no good plans, and no idea what the hell they're doing. What they do have is an army of foul-mouthed monkeys who want them dead, a beautiful woman who wants some answers, a sex-crazed tribal chief, a caffeine-addicted demigod who wants to be worshipped, and a telepathic skull who just wants a little excitement. Through nonstop comedy and good old-fashioned adventure these guys are facing some long odds but do Ron and Willy give up? No they don't. They get down to business. Monkey Business.

    

    Each book is also offered as a separate book on Amazon.The Few: Book 1Gunnery Sergeant Jacob McCardle is the commander of the Marine Detachment at the US Embassy, New Delhi, when the president of the United States arrives on an official visit, the same man who, as a Congressman, sponsored the bill that had decimated the Corps in a cost-cutting effort. As the president arrives, the embassy is attacked and isolated by a mob of nationalists. With the Indian government seemingly unwilling to take action to restore order and with an ambitious vice-president seizing this as an opportunity to move up to the White House, it is up to Gunny McCardle and his small band of Marines to keep the president alive. Faced with tremendous odds, Gunny has to lead his Marines in an almost impossible task. That is nothing new to the US Marines. Impossible tasks are the Corps' forte. But can his small detachment keep up the tradition of the Corps and succeed despite tremendous odds?The Proud: Book 2After the events at the US Embassy in New Delhi, the Marines are being brought back as a combat unit. Newly commissioned 2dLt Anthony Niimoto, a hero of the embassy takeover, is with the first Marine battalion to get back into the deployment cycle. Assigned to anti-piracy, this is supposed to be a dull deployment. But when a US ship is seized by Somali pirates, it's First Platoon, K 3/6 at the tip of the spear. With SSgt Davidson, an ex-Ranger who returns to his Marines roots, the two of them must lead their platoon into harms way, ever conscious of Black Hawk Down, the Battle of Mogadishu. Was Tony Niimoto a one-shot wonder in New Delhi, or does he really have what it takes to be a leader of Marines?The Marines: Book 3China is growing in power and in need of raw materials. When an aggressive general, with encouragement from an unnamed puppet master in the Politburo, moves to seize the Spratly Islands from The Philippines and Taiwan, the Marines of the 15th MEU are the only unit in position to do anything about it. What makes things more difficult is that the Chinese have made great strides in cyber-warfare that have negated America's technological superiority. What will be the result of years of letting China manufacture electronic components and even parts for the US aircraft, satellites, and communications systems?"Every Marine is a rifleman" has never been more true when the ultimate weapon in the nation's arsenal is the basic infantryman. But can Captain Tony Niimoto, a hero of both the embassy takeover in New Delhi and the hostage rescue in Somalia, lead his company against an overwhelming force of the finest of the People's Liberation Army? Can Sergeant Harrington Steptoe, Sergeant "Jay" McNamara, and First Lieutenant Peter Van Slyke step up into the mantle of leadership when all the odds are against them?

    The author doesn't pull any punches describing the good, the bad, the funny and the just plain ridiculous of the Submarine Service. Besides a wealth of information about what it's like to serve on a submarine, you'll meet real life characters like Tongue, Snake and Button Butt John. Did submarines make them rude, crude, and crazy. Or does the Submarine Service act as a magnet for every nut in the Navy? One thing is sure, after two months underwater, and with their back pay in their back pocket, Sub Sailors are as wild as cowboys after a cattle drive. Bar the doors and hide your daughters. Every reader owes it to themselves to use Amazons "Look In" feature to take a peek inside this unique and entertaining book.

    His successor as US Army Chief of Staff, General Douglas MacArthur, flies halfway around the world to butt heads with Josef Stalin and change history.When MacArthur relieves General Dwight D. Eisenhower from command in Europe, the Anglo-Allied advance devolves into a free-for-all as competing armies race for Berlin, and the changes echo across the globe. Here are just a few of the highlights from MacArthur’s Luck:Captain Jackie Robinson leads an armored task force across the Rhine. ...Major Barry Goldwater fire-bombs Tokyo. ...Commander Robert Heinlein struggles to save his wounded ship from kamikazes off Okinawa. ...Field Marshals Georgi Zhukov and Ivan Konev clash on the road to Berlin. ...SS-Obergruppenfuehrer Karl Wolff dares everything to negotiate a separate surrender to the Americans. ...Populated by a cast of realistic characters who will take you inside the American, German, Soviet, and Japanese military machines, and meticulously researched by a well-known military historian, MacArthur’s Luck opens The Fortunes of War series, exploring a world both tantalizingly like our own, but also dramatically different.Half the fun is figuring out what’s real, and what’s not.

    Apparently it’s fine for Scrimshaw Travel to make last minute amendments to the holiday without incurring any penalties or reducing the price in any way. That’s what the indifferent courier tells him on day one of the tour as she arrives in a clapped-out, old coach being driven by a partially-sighted driver. With the spa hotel replaced by a rundown guest house staffed by a neurotic manager, decrepit waitress and under-sexed, Italian waiter there doesn’t appear to be much of the brochure-described holiday left. Thank goodness for Angela, the rather lovely woman Derek pals up with on the journey down. She might just make the trip bearable. If only the other members of the group would leave them alone long enough to get to know each other, but Derek has always had the ability to attract the eccentric characters to him and he can’t escape them. Still, perhaps they’ll surprise him as he learns about their lives and secrets as they move from one hilarious excursion to another. And maybe Angela will provide one or two surprises herself. Driven to Distraction is a fun romp through the English countryside with characters finding love and friendship while travelling at twenty miles an hour. (Well, it is a clapped-out, old coach).

    With full-color photo essays, the author guides readers past good taste, sense and even logic into the magical, mayhem-ridden world known as his life.

    The book follows individual operations where special forces, aircraft, and the latest surveillance technology are fused together - in order to capture key figures or simply take out an enemy stronghold.The books account is both gritty and graphical as it follows the SAS, battling at times against overwhelming odds in a hostile country. Fighting a war hardened enemy with years of experience fighting occupying forces. Even these elite soldiers with advanced weaponry and immense fire support at their disposal are put to the ultimate test of skill and courage fighting in the 'Stan.'