Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

    For example, I was once pinned down by a young lad who repeatedly asked me why I was hitting myself, when he knew full well that I had temporarily ceded hegemony over my hands and forearms. I tried to explain it to him, but he didn’t seem to comprehend. In retrospect, I can only conclude that my explanation was not articulate enough.To that end, I and Phil Plait have teamed up to create precisely 128 insults designed to weaken the resolve of aggressors, while educating them in their primary field of interest. Whether the person pummeling you is a student of mathematics or belles-lettres, we have the right words for the occasion.Zach WeinersmithPS: In the highly likely situation that the person pummeling you refuses to cease his aggression until he understands the meaning of the insult, we have also provided an appendix in which the insults are explained.

    . . It is a period steeped in cinematic lore. Rebel filmmaker George Lucas, striking from a base in Northern California, won a tremendous box office victory against all odds with Star Wars, his sci-fi spectacular.During the ensuing craze, MAD's "Usual Gang of Idiots" managed to steal a few laughs at the movie's expense, soon discovering that Star Wars was the ultimate pop culture punching bag.Pursuing each Star Wars film's release with more mockery, the MAD men spent the next three decades making a farce of the Force and spreading mirth across the galaxy.Now, in this special edition volume, you'll chuckle as the Star Wars saga's greatest moments are mocked by such MAD greats as Dick DeBartolo, Mort Drucker, Don Martin, and Sergio Aragones; smirk as the striking similarities between the space battles created by Industrial Light & Magic and by the "Usual Gang of Idiots" are revealed; hum along to the unforgettable Star Wars musical, as penned by MAD's master lyricist, Frank Jacobs; gasp at the startling insights into R2-D2's love life; and marvel at the real reason why Lucas's lawyers never sued MAD.And that's just the beginning. . . .So, pick up this book and see why, when Star Wars gets the MAD treatment . . . Sith happens! It is your destiny.

    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

    1965.  War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...  What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series: ★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."

    In this mock autobiographical collection his mischievous drawings capture life's anxieties and ambitions from the mundane to the surreal. Here, at last, is The Truth about beer, doctors, shadow puppets, lunch, dolphins, boredom, and supernatural forces. Seductively strange and addictively amusing, this edgy little book welcomes the uninitiated and rewards the faithful.

    In another universe, humanity is overrun by monsters so evil that their very presence dims the light of the stars. In yet another universe, humanity is drawn into an endless battle for dominion over the galaxy. This is not one of those universes. In this universe, humanity is in charge of the Galactic Peace Committee. In theory, the Committee is an unmatched force for good, bringing peace and prosperity to countless worlds and ensuring that conflicts between different races are settled with words and not planet-cracking weaponry or super plagues designed to turn everyone into goo. In theory. Jake Smith is a diplomat. He works for the Committee. This is his story – and it goes about as well as you’d expect. In other words, it doesn’t go very well at all. Can Jake survive petty aliens? Sure. He’s a diplomat. It’s all part of the job. What about angry aliens? Probably. He does have a killer robot for a secretary, and he’s not bad with a shock staff. How about a fleet of aliens out for blood? That… that might be a little bit trickier. The Galactic Peace Committee… keeping peace (sort of) throughout the galaxy.

    At the perpetual age of 650, this is really no longer an option. The Full Moon Event Paulie Vergen is a Vampire living the daily grind of life until a fateful day when a newly infected Werewolf landed on his doorstep. All Paulie wanted was peace and quiet, but life didn't often seem to care about his plans. He's now faced with helping the poor Werewolf navigate through the Underworld in order to find the help that he needs. Bob the Zombie Bob is a Zombie who was just going about his business when a band of thieves stole his hand so that they could make a batch of Elfagra in the Upperworld. While it's bad enough that they've stolen Bob's hand for such a purpose, it comes to the Zombie's attention that if the bad guys use the wrong technique it could cause a cosmic rift that will spell the real death of Bob...not just the long, drawn out one that's part of being a Zombie. Gappy's Gadgets Gappy Whirligig is an industrious Gnome who has yet to reach the Age of Tinkering. In a flash, Gappy's life flips upside down, leaving him to make the decision to either strike out on his own or become a 42-year-old foster child. Gappy demonstrates his industrious spirit as he leaves Hubintegler's rules and regulations behind and instead seeks to make his mark in the seedy town of Planoontik.These stories get their influence from Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Robert Asprin's Myth Adventures, Monty Python, and countless other comedic mediums. This omnibus edition includes the first four books in the Tales from the Land of Ononokin series. You'll get wizards, vampires, werewolves, dwarves, elves, gnomes, orcs, ogres, giants, gorgans, humans, trolls, zombies, and more ... and it's all set in a fantastical world that will keep you giggling for weeks.

    Gemma died from acute myeloid leukaemia, just three days after being diagnosed.In Love, Interrupted, Simon is brutally honest about his journey through grief, and opens up about how close he came to ending his own life. Simon didn’t know how to carry on without Gemma; he just knew that, for the sake of his eight-year old son, he had to find a way …Love, Interrupted is a moving story of love, loss, faith, and family.

    I am Brandon Thighmaster. Monk. Hero. Inspiration. I enjoy crunching, squats, looking at myself, looking at other people looking at myself, and long walks on the beach. I also do adventures and stuff, and I guess you can read about them here. But enough about you, let's talk about me. Brandon Thighmaster."

    . . until they fall into the arms of the One who loves them unconditionally. Sierra Madrid’s life has just been turned upside down when she discovers the handcrafted quilt and journal of her ancestor Mary Kathryn McMurray, a young woman who was uprooted from her home only to endure harsh conditions on the Oregon Trail. Though the women are separated by time and circumstance, Sierra discovers that many of the issues they face are remarkably similar. By following Mary Kathryn’s example, Sierra learns to surrender to God’s sovereignty and unconditional love.The Last Sin Eater:A captivating tale of suffering, seeking, and redemption set in Appalachia in the 1850s, The Last Sin Eater is the story of a community committed to its myth of a human “sin eater,” who absolves the dead of their sins, and the ten-year-old child who shows them the Truth. All that matters for young Cadi Forbes is finding the one man who can set her free from the sin that plagues her, the sin that has stolen her mother’s love from her and made her wish she could flee life and its terrible injustice. But Cadi doesn’t know that the “sin eater” is seeking as well. Before their journeys are over, Cadi and the sin eater must face themselves, each other, and the One who will demand everything from them in exchange for the answers they seek.

     And, now that he’s running a fancy West End nightclub, Tony has new-found celebrity status – with a never-ending string of gorgeous women on his arm, he’s become the darling of the tabloids. However, despite his success, he still feels he lacks the respect he deserves and the status he desires. The little boy who lived on the streets is never far away. Desperate for recognition, he’s driven to achieve more and more. Most of all, he craves the acceptance of Ralph Gold and to become a bigger part of his extensive web of organised crime. Fearlessly facing up to enemies, winning battles and becoming the undisputed bosses of the London underworld can be a nasty business, but it’s the only business Tony and Jake know. And they’ll stop at nothing to succeed.

    There was a woman.There was a cross. But in factthey have hung him too high to be touched.—from "A Woman Wipes the Face of Jesus"

    She had a good job teaching school in the small town of Salmon, Oregon, and she finally had good friends she felt she could bare her soul to, but there was still something missing. When her friend Doris proposed sending for a mail order husband for Gretchen, who was seven months pregnant and unwed, she hoped for the best for her friend, but still felt badly for herself. Darryl Miller has always been known as one of the demon horde. He knows that if he stays in Beckham, Massachusetts, he will never rise above the reputation, but he has nowhere to go! When he receives a letter from his twin sister asking him to marry her pregnant friend, he only hesitates for a moment. Two weeks later, he arrived in Salmon to marry a stranger. The only trouble is the stranger refuses to marry him. Within an hour, he finds himself married to another friend of his sister’s. Will he be able to make a go of life with the beautiful straight-laced schoolteacher? Or has he made a huge mistake leaving everything to travel across country? This book was previously published in an anthology!

    Maybe God isn't who we thought He was. Maybe His thoughts aren't what we have been taught. "God's Blogs" contains some insightful, fresh thoughts that help us see more of God's character, His love, and His grace as He reflects on marriage, death, laughter, dads, and questions like "Why are we here?" and, "What about tsunamis and poverty?" A fascinating read that will make you laugh and cry and search your own thoughts about who He is. What Might God Say on His Blogsite? Basically I'm entering into your blogdom because "somehow the rumor got started that I was kind of boring. "For those of you who bought into that craziness, you should know that I'm the one who created all the stuff you love...all the stuff that makes life exciting. I invented funny and laughter. I created adventure and romance... I laugh a lot. "Divinely inspired. This is an awesome book " Jeff Foxworthy Very funny, smart man who loves God "Fresh thoughts on life with God from one of the most creative--and quirky--communicators I know." Louie Giglio Founder of Passion Conferences and author of "I Am Not But I Know I AM" "This book went through me like liquid fire. It is so inspiring, uplifting, and refreshing." Dolly Parton (everybody knows Dolly) "Wonderfully fresh and imaginative." John C. Maxwell Founder of INJOY Stewardship Services & EQUIP "I found myself reading it out loud to anybody who would listen. You are going to love this book." Andy Stanley Pastor, North Point Community Church Story Behind the Book "Blogging is a huge thing on the Web all over the world. Millions of people are logging on to millions of other people's journals just to see what they have to say. Some blogs have a larger audience than the New York Times. With blogging being so trendy right now, it occurred to me, What might people do if they thought God was blogging online about what He was seeing or what He thought was important? That being the hook, I wanted to take biblical principles written in a form similar to Eugene Peterson's The Message and attempt to use what is cultural to say what is timeless. God's truths about His love and grace and fatherhood, written in a contemporary fashion, might just penetrate the hearts of those who need Him during times of trial, or of those who aren't even sure He exists." -- Lanny Donoho