War: A Four Horsemen Short Story


Dave Turner - 2019
    1965.  War's found himself deep in the glamorous yet lethal world of international espionage. Unhappy with both the treachery and restrictive dress-code, when a name from the past reappears in his life War realises he must risk everything to keep the world safe once again. This short story follows on from the How To Be Dead series and continues the tale of everybody's favourite grumpy Horseman of the Apocalypse...  What Amazon readers are saying about the How To Be Dead Comedy Fantasy Series: ★★★★★ “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.”★★★★★ “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.”★★★★★ “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.”★★★★★ "Laughs and excitement combined!"★★★★★ “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”★★★★★ "If you like Tom Holt, Douglas Adams or Terry Pratchett, Dave Turner's books will fit perfectly into your collection."

Ridiculous Customer Complaints (and other statements)


David Loman - 2014
    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

Articles on Novels By George R. R. Martin


Hephaestus Books - 2011
    This book contains articles available free on Wikipedia and other free sources.

Peter and the Frankenstein


Darren Pillsbury - 2011
    Rowling (the HARRY POTTER series), Darren Shan (CIRQUE DU FREAK), R.L. Stine (the GOOSEBUMPS series), and Stephen King (IT)! Volume Three in the PETER AND THE MONSTERS series! Follow the adventures started in PETER AND THE VAMPIRES (Volume One) and PETER AND THE WEREWOLVES (Volume Two)!Tragedy has struck Peter’s best friend Dill. In his effort to help, Grandfather might have actually made things worse. But help is on the way in the form of a new ally, and important information surfaces that might explain the Curse now haunting Peter and his family. In this volume, Peter battles more supernatural mayhem, including:A scientist who pieces together a family of monstrous creations…A pack of small creatures that kill the local baker, and plan to make Peter their next victim…Peter’s own dark side, which rears its ugly head in a violent rampage…A mysterious ‘snow demon’ out of Native American legend that menaces Peter on a ski trip…And a couple of ‘walking dead’ who try to put Peter in the morgue during a visit to the hospital. The PETER AND THE VAMPIRES series is for teens and adults who, when they were kids, were looking for stories that kicked butt. The protagonist might be young, but the stories are dark, funny, and edge-of-your-seat suspenseful.PETER AND THE FRANKENSTEIN is the third in an ongoing series that includes PETER AND THE VAMPIRES (Volume 1) and PETER AND THE WEREWOLVES (Volume 2). This book is 150,000 words (450+ pages) and contains some mild language, violence, and scary situations.

The Ladybird Book Of Boxing Day


Jason A. Hazeley - 2016
    This delightful book is the latest in the series of Ladybird books which have been specially planned to help grown-ups with the world about them. The large clear script, the careful choice of words, the frequent repetition and the thoughtful matching of text with pictures all enable grown-ups to think they have taught themselves to cope. Featuring original Ladybird artwork alongside brilliantly funny, brand new text. Other new titles from the Ladybirds for Grown Ups Series: How it Works: The Student How it Works: The Cat How it Works: The Dog How it Works: The Grandparent The Ladybird Book of Red Tape The Ladybird Book of the People Next Door The Ladybird Book of the Sickie The Ladybird Book of the Zombie Apocalypse The Ladybird Book of the Meeting Previous titles in the Ladybirds for Grown Ups series: How it Works: The Husband How it Works: The Wife How it Works: The Mum How it Works: The Dad The Ladybird Book of the Mid-Life Crisis The Ladybird Book of the Hangover The Ladybird Book of Mindfulness The Ladybird Book of the Shed The Ladybird Book of Dating The Ladybird Book of the Hipster

300 Best Jokes: One-Liners and Funny Short Stories Collection (Donald's Humor Factory Book 1)


Donald Shaw - 2017
    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

The Headless Bust: A Melancholy Meditation on the False Millennium


Edward Gorey - 1999
    The story, told in verse, takes up just after Edmund's riotous party. He and the Bug are whisked off to a faraway village for another round of strange and vaguely eerie encounters. Fans of Gorey's distinctive ink drawings, tending toward the well -dressed and slightly mad, will not be disappointed - they make for an engrossing book with or without the accompanying deliciously odd text. ("Reversing at a tango tea/In Snogg's Casino-not-on-Sea/L-- tripped and cried,'I am afraid/They tampered with the marmalade.'") There is also plenty to be had for aficionados of the mysterious little rituals, mentioned nonchalantly, that seem so logical to the inhabitants of Gorey's bizarre world - the Bandage Folder's Ball being a head-cocking highlight. "The Headless Bust" is perfect for a winter's read by the fireplace, just before drifting off into fruitcake-induced dreams. Ali DavisNB The sub-title has the word 'on' on the cover and the word 'for' on the title page, both in Gorey's script.

The Twelve Terrors of Christmas


John Updike - 1994
    This long out-of-print classic is the perfect stocking-stuffer for any bah humbug.

Death: A Life


George Pendle - 2008
    Chronicling his abusive childhood, his near-fatal addiction to Life, his excruciating time in rehab, and the ultimate triumph of his true nature, this long-awaited autobiography finally reveals the inner story of one of the most troubling, and troubled, figures in history. For the first time, Death reveals his affairs with the living, his maltreatment at the hands of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, the ungodly truth behind the infamous “Jesus Incident,” and the loneliness of being the End of All Things. Intense, unpredictable, and instantly engaging, Death: A Life is not only a story of triumph against all odds, but also a tender, moving tale of unconditional love in a universe that, despite its profound flaws, gave Death the fiery determination to carve out a successful existence on his own terms. DEATH was born in Hell, the only son of Satan and Sin. He was educated in the Palace of Pandemonium and the Garden of Eden. Since before the Dawn of Time, he has ushered souls into the darkness of eternity. This is his first book.

Seriously Mum, Who's that Chicken?


Alan Parks - 2017
    In fact, each setback they experience just seems to immerse them deeper into a life they have totally fallen in love with. 'Seriously Mum, Who's that Chicken?' is the latest installment of their adventures as they continue to seize the day, living off-grid and loving every minute.

Possession: A Jack Nightingale Short Story


Stephen Leather - 2017
    But he can't do the exorcism alone - for that he needs the help of a priest. A very special priest. But Father O'Grady is all too well aware of the dangers of tangling with demons and he's going to need some persuading. Possession is a fast-paced supernatural story of almost 11,000 words. Jack Nightingale appears in the full-length novels Nightfall, Midnight, Nightmare, Nightshade, Lastnight, San Francisco Night and New York Night. He also appears in several short stories including Blood Bath, Cursed, Still Bleeding, Tracks, My Name Is Lydia, The Creeper, The Undead, The Asylum, The Mansion, Wrong Turn and The Cards. The Jack Nightingale time line is complex, this story is set sometime after Lastnight. Jack Nightingale has his own website at www.jacknightingale.com

All the Hits So Far But Don't Expect Too Much: Poetry, Prose & Other Sundry Items [With 14-Track CD]


Bradley Hathaway - 2005
    The commentary will contain background on the poems or more deeply delve into themes or topics discussed in the poems themselves. The spiritual seeker as well as the mature in faith will both benefit from the poems.

666 (31 Horrifying Tales From The Dead Book 4)


Drac Von Stoller - 2013
    It was Halloween and Samantha`s contractions were unbearable so her husband rushed his pregnant wife to the hospital to deliver their new bundle of joy. Mike told the doctor and nurse to take great care of his wife. The doctor and nurse reassured Mike they would take very good care of her and not to worry. Mike waited patiently in the waiting room as the doctor and nurse delivered their beautiful baby. After a few hours the baby finally arrived and the doctor entered the waiting room and told Mike to come in the room and see his new baby. Mike entered and his wife was all smiles and said "Honey, it`s a boy!" "I think he looks like a Johnny. What do you think?" asked his wife. "Johnny sounds fine to me," replied Mike. Mike was so excited and held his baby boy in his arms as tears rolled down his cheeks and said "Darling, I think he likes me." Mike stayed the night in his wife's room with their new baby, but as they were both sleeping, an unforeseen force came in their room that was about to change their lives forever, when they both woke in the morning. Morning came, and Samantha was discharged from the hospital, and time for their new baby to be raised in their new home. It wasn't until after little Johnny turned 6 years of age that things around the Delany Estate turned deadly. The first sign that Johnny had the mark of the beast was June 6. It was the 6th month, 6th day, and Johnny was 6. All the numbers represented 666.

Gosnell's Babies: Inside the Mind of America's Most Notorious Abortion Doctor


Steve Volk - 2013
    That distinction belongs to Gosnell's Babies." — Alexander Nazaryan, The Atlantic Wire"Very well written ... A must-read for anybody who followed this case." — Jake Tapper, CNNIn this chilling tale set against the backdrop of one of the most controversial issues of our times, award-winning journalist Steve Volk tells the decades-long saga of Kermit Gosnell — the abortion doctor whose clinic in a poor section of Philadelphia was revealed to be a house of horrors.Volk — the only journalist to speak to Gosnell since his conviction and imprisonment — brings the eccentric doctor to life, detailing his past in the early days of the abortion-rights movement and getting him to reveal, for the first time ever, why he did what he did. Was Gosnell a monster, or something else?Volk's powerful storytelling gives us a definitive understanding of a complex character, a horrific case, and a divisive issue.

The Subgenius Psychlopaedia of Slack: The Bobliographon


J.R. "Bob" Dobbs - 2006
    Scientific Shaman. Big Brother Au-Go-Go. He sits comfortably at the apex of the pyramid of worldly knowledge, twiddling his thumbs. His word, according to followers, is The Word, and that word is Slack. Beyond science, reason — and orgasm — find in Bobliography instant instructions for those who follow no master. The third installment of the holy SubGenius books, Bobliography is an uproarious send-up of all things cult. In addition to providing a guide for Eternal Salvation (or triple your money back), Bobliography is the encapsulated history of the SubGenius "movement" — from its beginnings in the 1980s to the growing Internet empire it has lately become — and also the essential, comprehensive collection of SubGenius lore. A Whole Earth catalog for the Deeply Weird, a Farmer's Almanac for the Truly Strange — Bobliography is the revelation of the millennium.