Games People Play
Eric Berne - 1964
More than five million copies later, Dr. Eric Berne’s classic is as astonishing–and revealing–as it was on the day it was first published. This anniversary edition features a new introduction by Dr. James R. Allen, president of the International Transactional Analysis Association, and Kurt Vonnegut’s brilliant Life magazine review from 1965.We play games all the time–sexual games, marital games, power games with our bosses, and competitive games with our friends. Detailing status contests like “Martini” (I know a better way), to lethal couples combat like “If It Weren’t For You” and “Uproar,” to flirtation favorites like “The Stocking Game” and “Let’s You and Him Fight,” Dr. Berne exposes the secret ploys and unconscious maneuvers that rule our intimate lives.Explosive when it first appeared, Games People Play is now widely recognized as the most original and influential popular psychology book of our time. It’s as powerful and eye-opening as ever.
The Lost Art of Listening: How Learning to Listen Can Improve Relationships
Michael P. Nichols - 1996
Nichols answers these questions and more in this thoughtful, witty, and helpful look at the reasons people don't hear one another. His book, a guide to the secrets of listening and being listened to, is filled with vivid examples that clearly demonstrate easy-to-learn techniques for becoming a better listener. He also illustrates how empathic listening enables us to break through misunderstandings and conflict and to transform our personal and professional relationships.
You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation
Deborah Tannen - 1990
This is the book that brought gender differences in ways of speaking to the forefront of public awareness. With a rare combination of scientific insight and delightful, humorous writing, Tannen shows why women and men can walk away from the same conversation with completely different impressions of what was said.Studded with lively and entertaining examples of real conversations, this book gives you the tools to understand what went wrong -- and to find a common language in which to strengthen relationships at work and at home. A classic in the field of interpersonal relations, this book will change forever the way you approach conversations.
It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy
Greg Behrendt - 2005
Greg and his wife, Amiira, share their hilarious and helpful roadmap for getting past the heartache and back into the game. From Greg Behrendt, the co-author of the smash two-million copy bestseller He's Just Not That Into You, comes It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken.There's no doubt about it--breakups suck. But in the first few hours or days or weeks that follow, there's one important truth you need to recognize: Some things can't and shouldn't be fixed, especially that loser who dumped you or forced you to dump him. Starting right here, right now, it's time to dry your tears, and open this book to Chapter One-and start turning your breakup into a breakover.The ultimate survival guide to getting over Mr. Wrong and reclaiming your inner Superfox. From how to put yourself through "he-tox," to how to throw yourself a kick-ass pity party, and reframing reality-- seeing the relationship for what it was. Complete with an essential workbook to help you put your emotions down on paper and heal.
Lying
Sam Harris - 2011
Most forms of private vice and public evil are kindled and sustained by lies. Acts of adultery and other personal betrayals, financial fraud, government corruption—even murder and genocide—generally require an additional moral defect: a willingness to lie.
Radical Honesty : How to Transform Your Life by Telling the Truth
Brad Blanton - 1994
It was a shocker! In it, Dr. Brad Blanton, a psychotherapist and expert on stress management, explored the myths, superstitions and lies by which we all live. And this newly revised edition is even worse! Blanton shows us how stress comes not from the environment, but from the self-built jail of the mind. What keeps us in our self-built jails is lying."We all lie like hell," Dr. Blanton says. "It wears us out...it is the major source of all human stress. It kills us." Not telling our friends, lovers, spouses, or bosses about what we do, feel, or think keeps us locked in that mind jail. The way out is to get good at telling the truth, and Dr. Blanton provides the tools we can use to escape from that jail of the mind. This book is the cake with the file in it.In Radical Honesty, Dr. Blanton coaches us on how to have lives that work, how to have relationships that are alive and passionate, and how to create intimacy where none exists. As we have been taught by the philosophical and spiritual sources of our culture for thousands of years, from Plato to Nietzsche, from the Bible to Emerson, the truth shall set you free.
How to Start a Conversation and Make Friends: Revised and Updated
Don Gabor - 1983
This revised and updated edition offers easy time-tested ways to improve anybody's ability to communicate in business and social situations, either in person or in cyberspace.
How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
David RichoDavid Richo - 2002
Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life: 1. Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships. 2. Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are. 3. Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament. 4. Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways. 5. Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control. When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.
Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It
Kamal Ravikant - 2012
Afterwards, people came up individually and told me how much what I'd shared meant to them. This book is based on the truth I spoke about.It's something I learned from within myself, something I believed saved me. And more than that, the way I set about to do it. This is a collection of thoughts on what I learned, what worked, what didn't. Where I succeed and importantly, where I fail daily.The truth is to love yourself with the same intensity you would use to pull yourself up if you were hanging off a cliff with your fingers. As if your life depended upon it. Once you get going, it's not hard to do. Just takes commitment and I'll share how I did it. It's been transformative for me. I know it will be transformative for you as well.
Love and Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs
Emerson Eggerichs - 2004
Emerson Eggerichs and his wife, Sarah, have already taken the Love & Respect message across America and are changing the way couples talk to, think about, and treat each other. What do you want for your marriage? Want some peace? Want to feel close? Want to feel valued? Want to experience marriage the way God intended? Then why not try some Love and Respect.A wife has one driving need?to feel loved. When that need is met, she is happy. A husband has one driving need?to feel respected. When that need is met, he is happy. When either of these needs isn’t met, things get crazy. Love & Respect reveals why spouses react negatively to each other, and how they can deal with such conflict quickly, easily, and biblically.What readers say about Love & Respect“I’ve been married 35 years and have not heard this taught.”“This is the key that I have been missing.”“You connected all the dots for me.”“As a counselor, I have never been so excited about any material.”“You’re on to something huge here.”Partner Love & Respect with the Love & Respect Workbook for Couples, Individuals, and Groups for an added experience. Love & Respect is also available in Spanish, Amor y Respeto.
Get Inside Her: Dirty Dating Tips & Secrets from a Woman on How to Attract, Seduce and Get Any Female You Want
Marni Kinrys - 2013
You see, these emails were not the typical online dating messages. They weren't asking me out on dates, or vying for desire or attention. They were sent from great guys, who no matter what they tried, always seemed to find that beautiful women ended up dating jerks and never calling them back.Now, you might be wondering what all these guys are doing emailing me their questions, but as a professional Wing Girl, it's my duty to be the girl who gives it to guys straight of the dating community. I'm always brutally honest and have been told I have a gift for seeing things from both sides of the dating lines, but it took me a few glasses of wine and some seriously deep thinking to try to piece the puzzle together.What was going on?I knew all my gorgeous girlfriends were looking for these types of men. Men who were exciting, fun, good, honest and who had their life together...So as they were they emailing me, detailing their failed attempts, I tried to find the one common factor that was holding these great guys back. I spoke with them at length about their dating history, trying to figure out if they were doing something wrong, and then it struck me.It wasn't them; it was "The Game" they had been told to play.They had the best intentions, but they were going about attracting and dating beautiful women in all the wrong ways. They were dating from the male perspective and in a way that seemed right to other guys; but this wasn't communicated clearly to women!As I started to reply to each email, instead of telling them what I thought they wanted to hear or what I thought male Pick Up Artists might tell them, I started to lay it all out on the line. Later on, when I asked my girlfriends for their opinion, they couldn't believe what I had written.I was revealing all secrets women would never tell men. I was putting it out there in a way that would give guys what my girlfriends called the upper hand, but I defended my actions. These were genuinely great guys! I was tired of hearing how women could never find what they were looking for. Now, when I was gave the men a road map to go out and find them, they freaked out!That's when I knew I had something worth sharing. Something that would turn the dating world on its head; finally, I thought, "It's time to shake things up!"If you have ever wondered why you aren't on the calendars of beautiful women, why they never seem to call back, or always end up with the jerks of the world, then you have to hear what I have to say.You need to accept that it's not your fault and face the facts. Men and women are different. We act, think, and date differently. If you want to find success, you have to see things from a different perspective. You have to gain the world's first (and best) awarded female Pick Up Artists perspective!Now when I go out, meet with clients, call, or email these great guys back, I get something in return. I get to see them finally date the women they have always wanted and deserved. They tell me how easy and simple it has become, and how they cannot believe they didn't think of it first.
Mindwise: How We Understand What Others Think, Believe, Feel, and Want
Nicholas Epley - 2014
It’s a sixth sense you use every day, in every personal and professional relationship you have. At its best, this ability allows you to achieve the most important goal in almost any life: connecting, deeply and intimately and honestly, to other human beings. At its worst, it is a source of misunderstanding and unnecessary conflict, leading to damaged relationships and broken dreams. How good are you at knowing the minds of others? How well can you guess what others think of you, know who really likes you, or tell when someone is lying? How well do you really understand the minds of those closest to you, from your spouse to your kids to your best friends? Do you really know what your coworkers, employees, competitors, or clients want?In this illuminating exploration of one of the great mysteries of the human mind, University of Chicago psychologist Nicholas Epley introduces us to what scientists have learned about our ability to understand the most complicated puzzle on the planet—other people—and the surprising mistakes we so routinely make. Why are we sometimes blind to the minds of others, treating them like objects or animals? Why do we sometimes talk to our cars, or the stars, as if there is a mind that can hear us? Why do we so routinely believe that others think, feel, and want what we do when, in fact, they do not? And why do we believe we understand our spouses, family, and friends so much better than we actually do? Mindwise will not turn other people into open books, but it will give you the wisdom to revolutionize how you think about them—and yourself.
Make Every Man Want You: How to Be So Irresistible You'll Barely Keep from Dating Yourself!
Marie Forleo - 2006
There are no rules, no list of things to do to land a husband in thirty days, and no reason to blame yourself if “he's just not that into you.” Please. Throw those books away.Instead, let's focus on you--and how you can make yourself more appealing to others in almost every situation--whether you have a man or not. Think of it as a crash course in desirability, a life-changing lesson in loving yourself inside and out. Once you embrace your unique qualities and dissolve your bad relationship habits, you'll be amazed to find how irresistible you are to others! This girl-friendly guide reveals: * Five Truths Every Irresistible Woman Needs to Know * Seven Habits of Highly Unattractive Women * Eight Secrets of Attracting the Right Man for You
How to Have Impossible Conversations: A Very Practical Guide
Peter Boghossian - 2019
Whether you're online, in a classroom, an office, a town hall—or just hoping to get through a family dinner with a stubborn relative—dialogue shuts down when perspectives clash. Heated debates often lead to insults and shaming, blocking any possibility of productive discourse. Everyone seems to be on a hair trigger.In How to Have Impossible Conversations, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay guide you through the straightforward, practical, conversational techniques necessary for every successful conversation—whether the issue is climate change, religious faith, gender identity, race, poverty, immigration, or gun control. Boghossian and Lindsay teach the subtle art of instilling doubts and opening minds. They cover everything from learning the fundamentals for good conversations to achieving expert-level techniques to deal with hardliners and extremists. This book is the manual everyone needs to foster a climate of civility, connection, and empathy."This is a self-help book on how to argue effectively, conciliate, and gently persuade. The authors admit to getting it wrong in their own past conversations. One by one, I recognize the same mistakes in me. The world would be a better place if everyone read this book." —Richard Dawkins, author of Science in the Soul and Outgrowing God
Calling in "The One": 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life
Katherine Woodward Thomas - 2004
Calling in “The One” shows you how.Based on the Law of Attraction, which is the concept that we can only attract what we’re ready to receive, the provocative yet simple seven-week program in Calling in “The One” prepares you to bring forth the love you seek. For each of the 49 days of Thomas’s thoughtful and life-affirming plan, there is a daily lesson, a corresponding practice, and instruction for putting that lesson into action in your life. Meditation, visualization, and journaling exercises will gently lead you to recognize the obstacles on your path to love and provide ways to steer around them. At the end of those 49 days, you will be in the ideal emotional state to go out into the world and find “The One.”An inspirational approach that offers a radical new philosophy on relationships, Calling in “The One” is your guide to finding the love you seek.