Except maybe her posh long-lost grandmother Matilda...But life isn't going well for Matilda either. The acclaimed etiquette books she wrote in her youth are no longer selling, her mortgage repayments are enormous and now her disheveled granddaughter has turned up out of the blue and she is not at all what Matilda hoped she'd be...In an attempt to get a new book deal and make some much needed money, Jess and Matilda decide to use Matilda's old etiquette guides and teach messy, modern Jess how to become the ultimate demure lady. The true test of their project will be to capture the heart of the sexy, notorious playboy Leo Frost and prove that Matilda's guides still work.Transforming Jess from trashy to tasteful will be no easy feat, and when Leo starts falling for Jess's newfound charms, what started out as a way to make some cash suddenly becomes a whole lot more complicated ...**THIS BOOK WAS PREVIOUSLY PUBLISHED UNDER THE TITLE THE VINTAGE GUIDE TO LOVE AND ROMANCE/LESSONS IN LOVE AND ROMANCE**Laugh your socks off with this hilarious feel-good chick lit read! It's packed with laugh out loud feel good moments, swoony, sexy romance, and truly unforgettable characters ! If you like funny romance books by Sophie Kinsella, Christina Lauren or Sophie Ranald, then you'll LOVE this hilarious laugh-out-loud romantic comedy from bestselling romance author Kirsty Greenwood.

    

    

    Older, slightly more wayward and most definitely not wiser, Takis has spent his years taking Spiros under his wing, whilst taking advantage of his younger friends naivety.When the duo, who often scrape by in life to make a living, discover they are heirs to an estate, they mistakenly believe that their ship has come in!As they discover their inheritance is not all as it seems, Takis begins to plot their way out, dragging poor Spiros with him. As one escapade spirals in to another, Takis is easily lured by the money signs while Spiros finds his eyes are being opened to a wider world. Amidst the ouzo and the scheming, this charming and comical tale will leave you eagerly awaiting the next instalment!

    White Cat, Black Cat: NEW DOG * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * It was a terrible day for the perky black cat His owner adopted a dog – just like that! A poodle too small to even harm a mouse Who acted as if he could rule the whole house.

    Loco of the influential blog "Loco in Yokohama) vividly illustrates with unflinching introspection and candor, the birth and evolution of a racist, and in doing so makes the persuasive argument that the only way to cure this social virus is by first acknowledging and engaging one’s own racism. Loco takes us on a scintillating journey from the streets of Brooklyn, where a child’s first playground was the frontlines of the Black Nationalist Movement of the seventies, to a period of black militancy, military service, interracial romance and corporate bigotry in the eighties and nineties. Following the traumatic events of 9/11/2001, Loco relocates to Japan where he learns that old adage -— you can’t hide from yourself -— the hard way. He finds the woman he was made to love; only she’s a member of a race he has come to loathe. In the name of this love, Loco confronts this dark stowaway with deep roots even as the world is literally falling apart around him, in the form of the Tohoku disaster of 3/11/2011. A book that is both a memoir and an impassioned call to arms, Hi! My Name is Loco and I am a Racist tells us in no uncertain terms that while racism continues to be demonized as a dark aberration that only “evil people,” ignorant fools, or people lacking compassion and common decency are subject to, then it will remain at large – hiding in plain sight, in our schools, offices, carpools, living rooms...and sometimes even in the mirror.

    Now blonde L.A. sophisticate Buffy Arden arrives in Nowhere Junction, Texas, to introduce her cute little girl to the infant’s unprepared father, no-nonsense auto mechanic Carter Murchison.Carter has only a vague memory of his experiences while attending a conference in the City of Angels. Thanks to the effects of spiked punch, he thought he was making a donation to benefit his favorite charity. A very strange donation…He’s not sure how to deal with this smart-mouthed lady who happens to have the same name as his cat and who quickly turns his life upside-down, opening a boutique in his garage and matchmaking for his reclusive widowed father. And what about this sweet baby daughter who lays claim to his heart? Worst of all, her mother appears to be doing the same.

    They love us unconditionally, shower us with attention, and because of them, we actually live longer. So, what can possibly be awkward about our animal BFFs? Well . . . nothing. In fact, we’re the awkward ones. We adore our pets, but let’s face it—sometimes L-O-V-E makes us go a little overboard. Like giving them middle names, throwing them elaborate birthday parties, and making them a Christmas sweater to match with the rest of the family. Truth is, what they cherish most is our companionship. And maybe that’s the reason we care about them so much—because for such simple pleasures, they allow us to be as awkward as we want.

    Sheba is an elderly one-eared cat. When the Blitz begins, how will they survive? It's the start of the Second World War and Bark and Howl are lost in the dark maze of tunnels under London. With Sheba's help, they learn how to survive. But when the bombs begin to fall, the puppies become separated. As the attacks continue, Bark and Howl are frightened, but they know the tunnels so well - they're the only ones who can lead hundreds of trapped people out of danger. Will Bark and Howl find each other - and be victorious in leading Londoners to safety?

    Will Dipper and Mabel's summer be ruined? Find out in this fan novel as well as Mystery #1, The Axolotl, a demon who wants to revive Bill Cipher!

    One year that changes everything. They seem to have it all. They’re in good health and are financially secure. They live in a pleasant and comfortable town. But as their lives intertwine, cracks emerge and restlessness grows. For Clive, is retirement the beginning of the end? Can fun-loving Saskia break free from her adulterous husband? Will Andy marry his childhood sweetheart? Is Jamie prepared to change his dishonest ways? Might Ellie’s happy marriage be shattered by temptation?Heart-warming and heart-breaking collide in this novel about aspirations, expectations and the realities of everyday life.

    Surrounded by seasonal joy - and way too many stuffed Yuletide beavers - at the island house her family has owned for generations, she's all set for the perfect holiday.But when a young friend asks for help with figuring out a financial snafu, her perfect day is in jeopardy. Can Irma - a woman with a yen for strong tea, cardio, and a well-oiled gun - find a thief before the festive season kicks off, or will Christmas be ruined?Peace on Earth is a 30,000 word holiday novella, and is the first book in the forthcoming Beaver Island Mystery series.

    Even as his price drops with each passing day, no one spares him a glance unless it's to call him names. Having practically given up on life, the kitty himself is most shocked of all when an older gentleman comes into the store and wants to take him home! Will the man and the cat find what they're looking for..in each other?

    After her brother Jack adopts Albert, a Jack Russell terrier, Jenny’s calm life becomes terrier-ized. The story details the friendship that eventually develops between Jenny and Albert as he widens her world to include a variety of new people and experiences. How (NOT) to Kiss Your Dog contains humor, youthful romance and dog spit. Combine those elements with an eccentric grandmother, the second witch from Macbeth and a wild tongued terrier. Shake well. The result is an award winning science fair experiment that finally answers the age old dog vs. human oral hygiene question: “Are dogs’ mouths really cleaner than humans’?”

    The bookstore or library is half full of that kind of crap. What you're holding here is a collection of quips and observations with a refreshingly gloomy, sometimes twisted, always funny take on life. Or lack thereof.With illustrations by renowned artist Brian Andreas, this book is a glimpse inside the humorously askew mind of a writer whose witticisms have been featured on NPR, printed onto t-shirts, performed on stage in Germany, and posted online at the Washington Post, Wall Street Journal, and New York Times. He's been named one of the top funniest people on Twitter by the likes of Maxim, MSNBC and Mashable.