He chronicles the torture of finding a job before the internet when you had to talk on the phone all the time, and fantasizes, as we all do, about who to tell off when he finally wins an Oscar. As Gary himself says, "These are essays from my childhood and young adulthood about things that still annoy me."Original, brazen, and laugh out loud funny, Do You Mind if I Cancel? is something not to be missed.

    He finds out the three men still alive who were involved and dedicates his life to bringing them to justice. The story takes place in 1880 Texas, a harsh land with an equally harsh code of justice. The outlaws fight back, seriously wound Jubal, and flee into the West thinking their adversary is now dead. But Jubal is not dead. He recovers with help from Maddy Hastings and seeks out each killer and takes care of business. The Texas Rangers were among the toughest lawmen ever in the West, and Jubal Coe proves to be one of the very best.

    Lost in the maze of one patient's shattered mind is a terrible secret, so terrible that even in his shattered state he cannot be allowed to live.The Twins are young, blond, nubile women---and the most deadly team of assassins in the world. Their first attempt at killing the patient succeeds only in killing a double, and they are almost killed by two unlikely bystanders: ex-military special operator Dale Miller (No Other Option) and former CIA operator Charley Payne (Warrior in the Shadows).Miller and Payne are recruited by the CIA to protect the patient. And a clandestine game of cat and mouse between the assassins and the protectors leads to Amsterdam, where the money man behind the Twins' operations has set up base, and to a bloody showdown in Athens, where Dale Miller nearly loses his life.It's left to Charley Payne to discover the secret locked deep in the subconscious of the patient's shattered mind and hunt one deadly man through the streets of Washington, D.C., and stop him before he can unleash an event that could kill millions.Marcus Wynne took you on a thrill ride in his first book, No Other Option, when a special ops team had to hunt down one of its own. In Warrior in the Shadows, Payne pursued a psychopathic killer who drew his strength from cannibalism and black magic. Brothers in Arms unites the heroes from his previous books in a global battle to face down a threat to the United States of America.

    Lord help her… NOTE: This volume contains the first three books of the Jessica Christ series, including ... Book 1: The BeginningBook 2: And It Was GoodBook 3: It's a Miracle!*Plus* the first chapter of Book 4: Nu Alpha Omega The Beginning Jessica McCloud knows first-hand that it’s tough to fit in when you’re God’s only begotten daughter. While she has the power to smite, and she’s privy to most of the juicy gossip in her West Texas town, nobody is knocking on her door with frankincense and myrrh. The Messiah-in-the-making still has to contend with algebra tests, her first crush, and menstrual cramps with the power to spark lightning storms…As if dealing with her overbearing Father and a scheming preacher wasn’t enough, Jessica must face down the demons that lurk around every corner. No matter what she wants from life, everything seems to lead to a final showdown with the devil. The daughter of God has a choice: face the destiny thrust upon her or find some way to forge her own path…And It Was GoodAs she enters the uncharted territory of high school, Jessica McCloud could use a few more friends who believe in her. Of course, that means something entirely different for the daughter of God. After her two-millennia-dead half-brother visits her in a dream and tells her it’s time for her to stop messing around, Jessica begins the hunt to discover what miracles she can perform. And if one of them happens to win the heart of her long-time crush, Greg, then so be it. But when a reporter with a grudge against God catches wind of her first miracle, Jessica stumbles her way through one scandal after another until she wonders if the world wouldn’t be a much happier place with no miracles at all. It's a Miracle! Miracles happen when you least expect them. And if you’re Jessica McCloud, God’s only begotten daughter, they happen when you least want them. Is an uneventful senior year of high school too much for Jessica to hope for?Yes. Yes it is.Instead of focusing on college applications, Jessica must juggle Jimmy’s newest scheme, Eugene’s latest slander, and a gruesome (unpaid) internship at Midland Memorial Hospital. And just when she’s starting to get the hang of it, a serious PR blunder ignites a firestorm of brand new accusations. It would take nothing short of a miracle for Jessica to come out on top this round, and she isn’t holding her breath…

    You may find it for free on the web. Purchase of the Kindle edition includes wireless delivery.

    An elderly woman who sat down in her recliner to take a nap and never woke up. But Sheriff Weber would soon learn there was nothing routine about this case at all.When an autopsy revealed that she had been murdered, things take a bizarre turn. The sheriff discovers that there were many people who had reason to want Edna Knowles dead, among them relatives she had cheated out of an inheritance, two adult stepchildren she had treated cruelly, and a high school sweetheart from long ago upon whom she had committed the ultimate betrayal.As the sheriff and his deputies investigate the case, they find that searching for the old woman’s killer is only one mystery awaiting them in a house filled with secrets. Who was Edna Knowles, and why did she do the bizarre things she did? There is no doubt that she was an oddball, a recluse, and a hoarder. Maybe even a monster?

    Perfect for fans of Val McDermid, Karin Slaughter and Patricia Cornwell.'The Queen of Crime' - Woman & Home on Hard GirlsThe deadly DI Kate Burrows trilogy: the only time Martina's written from the Old Bill's perspective.Kate is the hard-but-fair copper whose investigations - and heart - become dangerously entwined with London's most infamous gangster, Patrick Kelly. But when there's a killer on the loose, Kate Burrows is the only woman for the job. THE LADYKILLER. BROKEN. HARD GIRLS.

    The stories reveal their characters and histories, but the scrabble itself is a mere transient remission from the vagaries and harshness of prison life, which continues unabated around them and through them.We are party to a voyage through calm settled waters of support, camaraderie and story-telling, to storms of violence, abuse and abject despair in a rigid, alien and unforgiving environment. We feel the emotions of the highs and lows of prison life through the victimisation, determination and hope of our players, who ultimately all show resilience in one way or another.It is a fable about humanity, garnered with wit, insight and encouragement, with a little whodunnit? thrown in for good measure.

    This omnibus brings together the first three Reginald Perrin novels containing a lifetime's outrageous and hilarious adventures.When we first meet Reggie, he is sick to death with selling exotic ices at Sunshine Desserts. Driven to desperation by the rat race and the unpunctuality of Britain's trains, Reggie's small eccentricites escalate to the extreme, until finally he leaves the unacceptable face of capitalism behind by driving off in a stolen motorised jelly. In his pursuit of the unconventional, he devotes himself to faking his own death, opening a shop devoted to selling completely useless goods, and setting up a commune strictly for the middle-class and middle-aged.Join Reggie, who didn't get where he is today without some help from some memorable supporting characters, in one man's quest to avoid an everyday existence.

    Rudnick, who writes for The New Yorker and has written the screenplays for the films In and Out, Sister Act, and Addams Family Values, shares his hilarious observations on life in New York City and New Jersey, the perils of show business, and dealing with one’s family, however crazy they may be. As David Sedaris says, “There’s no book wiser or half as funny as I Shudder.”

    With an attitude ... and opinions ... on everything. "The PsychoKitty Speaks Out" is the diary of Max, a put-upon and under-appreciated domestic feline with both a disdain and a fondness for Sticky Little People, an addiction to Kitty Crack, and an appetite for Stinky Goodness. He began his popular blog "The Psychokitty Speaks Out" in October of 2003, and this is an expansion of that journal; all those dates when he didn't blog--they're here, in all his snarky glory.

    When a mysterious phantom enters his life, he sets himself on a quest to discover the true meaning of lummoxness, and what he learns along the way is both shocking and hilarious.Written with honesty and selfeffacing wry humor, Lummox is an exceptional story of manhood at a time of its redefinition, a book that will leave you laughing out loud in recognition and cheering for lummoxes everywhere.

    Too on the nose? Sorry. Let me dial it back.  I’m Mike Birbiglia and I’m a comedian. You may know me from Comedy Central or This American Life or The Bob & Tom Show, but you’ve never seen me like this before. Naked. Wait, that’s the name of another book. Also I’m not naked as there are no pictures in my book. Also, if there were naked pictures of me, you definitely wouldn’t buy it, though you might sneak a copy into the back corner of the bookstore and show it to your friend and laugh. Okay, let’s get off the naked stuff. This is my first book. It’s difficult to describe. It’s a comedic memoir, but I’m only 32 years old so I’d hate for you to think I’m “wrapping it up,” so to speak. But I tell some personal stories. Some REALLY personal stories. Stories that I considered not publishing time and time again, especially when my father said, “Michael, you might want to stay away from the per­sonal stuff.” I said, “Dad, just read the dedication.” (Which I’m telling you to do too.) Some of the stories are about my childhood, some are about girls I made out with when I was thirteen, some are about my parents, and some are, of course, about my bouts with sleepwalking. Bring this book to bed. And sleepwalk with me.

    I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world. —from the IntroductionActual reader feedback: "I find it truly appalling that there are people in the world like you. You are a disgusting, vile, repulsive, repugnant, foul creature. Because of you, I don't believe in God anymore. No just God would allow someone like you to exist." "I'll stay with God as my lord, but you are my savior. I just finished reading your brilliant stories, and I laughed so hard I almost vomited. I want to bring that kind of joy to people. You're an artist of the highest order and a true humanitarian to boot. I'm in both shock and awe at how much I want to be you." Now with 16 Pages of Photos and a New Introduction

    When he emerged he had under his arm a manuscript, a genre-smashing book about comedy, tragedy, love, loss, war, and redemption. When asked if this was the celebrity memoir, Norm replied, "Call it anything you damn like."