Yes, she’s thirty-three, single, and has had to work as a waitress and children’s party entertainer since her social worker salary suffered from budget cuts, but she stays positive and manages to pay the mortgage on her flat. Her home is her sanctuary – until Tom moves in downstairs. Lucy and Tom quickly fall in love and into a serious relationship, which is complicated by Tom’s recent separation from his wife, who he has two young sons with. Lucy is heartbroken when Tom breaks up with her, saying that something has to give in his busy life. Encouraged/coerced/badgered by her friends into getting ‘back on that horse’, Lucy finds herself at a tacky Singles Night; dating Danny, a Justin Timberlake impersonator; and attempting a rendezvous with her ‘special friend’. Lucy’s quest to move on from Tom would be a whole lot easier if she didn’t have to hear everything he does. After all, how on earth do you get over someone when you can hear them peeing? Him Downstairs is relatable Chick Lit for readers 18+ who have dipped their toe into the world of modern dating and relationships. It contains adult language and humour, and is written in ‘British English’.

    Toddler - the story of what happens when your little one is transformed from an innocent bundle of joy into a creature that walks, talks... and craps in a plastic bucket in the middle of your living room.Man vs Toddler exposes the lie that, that when it comes to parenting 'it gets easier'. But it is just as honest, foul-mouthed and heart-warming as Matt's first book, and will have you laughing and crying with recognition as he shares his observations and advice on everything from tantrums to the horrors of soft-play.

    She hasn't laid eyes on her great aunt Abigail since she was eight, so she’s stumped when she inherits Abgail's house in the small hamlet of Alpine Grove.Kat's uncomplicated life gets decidedly less so when she discovers the inheritance comes with some hairy conditions: four dogs and five cats that her aunt wanted her to love as her own. Of course, the house smells like a barn--with a touch of antique skunk--and, naturally, has serious roof issues. And that's before the three-legged cat gets stuck in the wall and the shower goes kablooey.When Kat meets Joel, an unemployed techie type with no love lost for his sister, Kat looks past his obvious flaws, given his timely and desirable skill set: a talent for fixing things (and his own tools).Despite out-of-control dogs, cat fights, dust dinosaurs, massive spiders and an old grizzled hippie passed out in the yard, Kat discovers the tranquility of the forests of Alpine Grove starting to seep into her soul.And why she can't she stop thinking about Joel?

    She rejects the outside world and embarks on a contented existence of isolated self-indulgence. But when her nice neighbours Fred and Geraldine introduce her to the roguishly desirable actor Finbar Flynn the walls of the citadel begin to crack . . .

    From the first moment Derek, who was not until then a cat-lover, met a tiny bundle of fur with Jeannie, through to the pet's old age when he would still walk down to the stream to make 'Monty's Leap', this is a touching story of friendship between two people and their cat.

    To me, Mutts is exactly what a comic strip should be." -Charles Schulz, Peanuts creatorMUTTS appears in 700 newspapers in more than 20 countries and receives about 1 million visits each month to its official Web site at www.muttscomics.com.Always striking a delicate balance between lighthearted fun and responsible social commentary, Patrick McDonnell's MUTTS has been recognized by the National Cartoonists Society as Best Strip of the Year for its distinctive style, heartwarming humor, and strong yet gentle stand on important social issues.McDonnell, a New York Times best-selling author, has been awarded the Reuben Award for Best Cartoonist of the Year, as well as the Max and Moritz Award for Best International Comic Strip, the Adamson Statuette from the Swedish Academy of Comic Art for Best International Comic Strip Artist, and multiple Genesis Awards.

    Playful categories including "bowties," "surprise!," and "happy cats" showcase all the charm and delightful quirks of the wide world of cats. This is a gift that will have feline fans smiling in recognition, surprise, and appreciation.--chroniclebooks.com

    

    Could you keep your cool while talking to all levels of stupid? Would you be able to wear a headset all day without wanting to throw it out of the window? All calls are recorded, analysed and timed to the second. Average handling time (AHT) is discussed as if it's the very meaning of life and managers are always coming up with new ways to shave milliseconds from each call. Is it acceptable to only have a total eight minutes a day for visits to the toilet or coffee machine? Imagine not being allowed to hang up on someone who is screaming abuse down the line at you. Welcome to the Call Centre! Izabelle worked in call centres for many years; from insurance to home shopping, from selling advertising to discussing loans. Finally in the early hours one morning, she decided enough was in fact far too much and left her final call centre job the same day, never to return. On her way out of the door for the final time she vowed she would write a book about life in a call centre. Here is that book. Read about call centres in general, memorable customers and staff. How do staff stay sane? What is Big Red? Are cranberries the true meaning of Christmas? Why would you have leather trousers round your ankles in a lift? How not to impress your boss. Izabelle shares these and many other true tales from her years of incarceration in UK call centres.

    She knows how to scratch upright surfaces, cough up hairballs, send messages with her pee, and party all night. To the feline mind, these are the stuff of everyday life--as important as sleeping all day and grooming for several hours using nothing but your tongue.Your clever kitty knows you very well (after all, she sits and stares at you when you're in the bathroom). But how well do you know her? Find out why cats knead against us, the best way to hold a cat, how cats can jump onto your kitchen counters without even a running start, why they chew on your sweaters.Award-winning pet experts Dr. Marty Becker and Gina Spadafori explain the ins and outs of the feline psyche. Because the better you understand cats, the easier it is to love the kitty on your couch. Can you teach an old cat new tricks? You bet! Expecting a baby? It's perfectly okay to keep your cat. What about kittens? You'll find everything you always wanted to know about feline sex but were afraid to ask.Your cat's not crazy, but she can be mysterious. Did you know cats can tell time? They talk with their tails and walk on their toes. And there are even rumors that some cats are descendents of space aliens. It's no wonder the ancient Egyptians were not the only ones who worshipped them.You'll also find the answers to questions that tend to tickle your curiosity: Why do cats' eyes glow in the dark? What's in catnip that makes kitties so silly? Can curiosity really kill a cat?You've got questions? This book's got answers. Do cats always land on their feet? Find out!

    In fact, each setback they experience just seems to immerse them deeper into a life they have totally fallen in love with. 'Seriously Mum, Who's that Chicken?' is the latest installment of their adventures as they continue to seize the day, living off-grid and loving every minute.

    He's been there before, but he never felt like he deserved it until now. Peeing on the carpet is one thing, but now he's killed a man. And it wasn't just any old man--any old man may have been forgiveable. Bogart killed Swifty's father, and Swifty is Bogart's human, so now he deserves his jail sentence. Now he deserves a death sentence. He's truly a bad dog. In an effort to give Swifty back the part of him that he took away, Bogart escapes and embarks on a journey to recover the dead man's Red Sox hat. Joined by his border collie girlfriend, Ginger, and an abandoned kitten named Snowball, the three of them set out to become good again.

    One day you are young, free and single; the next you are bald, fat and washed-up, with weird tendrils of hair growing out of your ears. None of it seems fair. With age should come dignity and respect, but instead everyone makes tired jokes about buying a motorbike. Marcus Berkmann isn't having it. Having marked his fiftieth birthday by hiding under the duvet for six weeks, the author of the cricket classics Rain Men and Zimmer Men is now determined to find some light in the all-consuming darkness. Musing over birth, death and all the messy stuff in between, he concludes that however dreadful you look in the mirror today, it will be much worse in ten years' time. His brutally candid despatch from the frontline is not for the faint-hearted, which is to say anyone under thirty-five.

    When the system begins to misfire under the workload, the ill-equipped representatives of God and the Devil tasked with managing the process are given an ultimatum. Fix The Afternet or go back to your previous afterlives. They begin an odyssey through the hordes of souls awaiting judgement and the oblivious living in search of a solution. Rich in comic detail and populated with characters real and imagined from throughout time, their quest is never going to be straightforward…

    Plus bonus scenes from the Ian Dalton - Victoria Wilde versions along with the erotic series prequel, Desperate Thoughts. Plus a sneak peek bonus chapter of the upcoming fifth book in the series, Friends With Way Too Many Benefits, releasing on 12/17/2013. Book 1 - Friends With Partial Benefits Jillian Grayson is a disillusioned divorcée and best-selling romance novelist who suddenly can't write a chapter without her hunky male heartthrob suffering ED, an STD, or even worse. Brian Nash is a tennis-obsessed college senior who's unlucky in love and the roommate and best friend of Jillian's son, Rob. When Rob brings Brian home for Spring Break, and Brian meets the surprisingly young and tennis passionate Jillian, their shared interest quickly develops into an intense mutual attraction. After nearly giving in to their feelings, they hatch a plan, while under the influence (of something more than just the perfect Miami night), to be Friends With Partial Benefits, complete with rules to define the boundaries. Will the lonely pair continue with this distinctive relationship, actually explore their desires, or discover all of it is a really bad idea? Book 2 - Friends With Full Benefits For best-selling romance novelist Jillian Grayson, writer's block is a thing of the past now that her clandestine relationship with her son's best friend, Brian Nash, has lifted her out of a post-divorce funk. The prospect of breaking the news to her son seems daunting, but it's nothing compared to the nightmare of meeting Brian's superstrict, off-the-wall, disapproving parents. After Jillian, Brian and his younger brother Jim, learn an eye-opening secret about the Nash parents they all go scurrying back to Miami where Jillian's best friend Victoria finds Brian's sexy, but innocent college senior brother to be just what the doctor ordered. But when Jim comes on a little too seriously, will Victoria lose interest and return to her life of casual fun or will things get even more complicated? Book 3 - Friends With More Benefits As Jillian and Brian's destination wedding date nears, Jillian's just released novel's complicated success threatens to destroy their big day. While Rob's new job grows extraordinarily more mysterious Brian's becomes infinitely more unfulfilling and both struggle to find the answers. Victoria finds it more and more difficult to hide her secrets and when they are finally exposed there is no shortage of collateral damage. When thoughts are revealed will the wedding be ruined, will Jillian's career survive and will everyone forgive Victoria? Book 4 - Friends With Extra Benefits Victoria, Jillian, Brian, Jim, Caroline, and Rob are back in book four, the 400-page epic next chapter in the series. Who will prevail in the Brookhart v. Grayson trial? Will Victoria have a boy or a girl, and will she finally find happiness? Will Rob figure out what the hell is going on with his mysterious and unstable boss, and will Brian find a career? Will you be able to get through the steamy chapters without tossing your e-reader to the floor and chasing your partner around the room? Prequel - Desperate Thoughts While struggling to move on with her life, a young widow tumbles into a clandestine sexual encounter with a shy college freshman who reminds her all too much of her late husband. Afterward, she's re-awakened sexually and motivated to pursue her desperately unfulfilled desires.