She was asked by many to put these short essays into book form, to create, as one reader said, something to "take to the beach, or bed, or on an airplane." Elizabeth and her friend, the book's designer Phyllis Florin, happily complied, and they hope that their offering will be as welcome as flowers in a mailbox.

    We promise to make you laugh and give you that much needed break in the middle of all the crazy.We have partnered with the most talented bunch of moms and dads to bring you the best, the funniest, and the most outrageous stories to get you from girth to birth.Are you having strange cravings? Have you asked yourself what in the hell is happening to my body? Have strangers touched your belly? If you've answered yes to any of these questions then this is the book for you! Prop up your cankles, grab a bowl of your favorite ice cream covered in olives and have a laugh with our crew. Things are about to get real.

    Included are The Very Strange Mr. Fish, The Butcher of Plainfield, From the Pros to the Penitentiary, Nightmare on Elm Drive, The Brown's Chicken Murders, The Kitty Genovese Murder, The Wichita Horror, The Hi Fi Murders, The Poster Boy for Capital Punishment, The Yogurt Shop Murders, The Vampire Rapist, The Murder of James Bulger, Thrill Killers: Leopold and Loeb, The Killing of Anita Cobby, Death in a Bottle: The Tylenol, Excedrin and Sudafed Murders, The Easter Sunday Murders, Murder at McDonald's, The Luby's Massacre, Charles Manson and Helter Skelter. Part Two: Quick Hits holds 13 shorter chapters that include Eric Smith, The Camden Killer, Killed Over a Kiss, The Bed & Breakfast Murders, Who Shot the War Hero?, The Colorado Springs Killings, Joseph Vacher, Jeanne Weber, Michael Hernandez, The Tourniquet Killer, Patricia Johnson and Killed Over Facebook Status. The book ends with I Don't Like Mondays.

    

     Includes Overdue Account, Walter's Cargo Shorts, Simon's Piecharts, Missing Missy, Obviously a Foggot, Formal Complaints, Justin’s Floodlight, Matthew’s Party, Permission Slip and many more.

    If the genesis for a book is to shut your wife up, I guess that’s as good as any.  On top of that, Olivia’s mother had burdened her with one of those Southern middle names kids love to make fun.  To see “deBelle” printed on the front of a book seemed vindication for all the childhood teasing.  With storytelling written in the finest Southern tradition from the soap operas of Chandler Street in the quaint town of Gainesville, Georgia, to a country store on the Alabama state line, Oliviade Belle Byrd delves with wit and amusement into the world of the Deep South with all its unique idiosyncrasies and colloquialisms.  The characters who dance across the pages range from Great-Aunt LottieMae, who is as “old-fashioned and opinionated as the day is long,” to Mrs. Brewton, who calls everyone “dahling” whether they are darling or not, to Isabella with her penchant for mint juleps and drama.  Humorous anecdotes from a Christmas coffee, where one can converse with a lady who has Christmas trees with blinking lights dangling from her ears, to Sunday church,where a mink coat is mistaken for possum, will delight Southerners and baffle many a non-Southerner. There is the proverbial Southern beauty pageant, where even a six-month-old can win a tiara, to a funeral faux pas of the iron clad Southern rule—one never wears white after Labor Day and, dear gussy, most certainly not to a funeral.  Miss Hildreth Wore Brown—Anecdotes of a Southern Belle is guaranteed to provide an afternoon of laugh-out-loud reading and hilarious enjoyment.

    Inside, storytellers from around the world share times when, in the face of seemingly impossible situations, they found moments of beauty, wonder, and clarity that shed light on their lives and helped them find a path forward.From a fifteen-year-old saving a life in Chicago to a mother of triplets trekking to the North Pole to a ninety-year-old Russian man recalling his standoff with the KGB, these storytellers attest to the variety and richness of the human experience, and the shared threads that connect us all. With honesty and humor, they stare down their fear, embrace uncertainty, and encourage us all to be more authentic, vulnerable, and alive.

    Subterranean Press bundles together all of their John Scalzi titles into one easy-to-buy special this November:How I Proposed To My Wife: An Alien Sex StoryAn ElectionJudge Sn Goes GolfingQuestions for a SoldierThe Sagan DiaryThe Tale of the WickedThe God EnginesYou're Not fooling Anyone When You Take Your Laptop to the Coffee Shop

    She lives in Manila with her three cats. Visit her site: www.JessicaRulesTheUniverse.com

    Elsewhere might be revealed in the tract-house adventures of a home-décor reality show, at a discount funeral home in a strip mall, or in the story of an armed man named Honey Bear in the hunt for his beloved but now missing sleeper sofa which he left in a store unit. Off Ramp shows us America through the humorous gaze of Hank Stuever, who finds beauty in the midst of the most unlikely and invisible lives and places.

    Told in eloquent, honest prose, Art’s Cello is a story about coming to terms with the past and letting go of the failures we allow to define us — and, in the process, honoring the lives of those we’ve lost. Jim McKean is an international award-winning violinmaker, author, and corresponding editor of Strings Magazine. He is a graduate of the first violinmaking school in America and the former president of the American Federation of Violin and Bow Makers. His novel, Quattrocento, was published in 2002. Cover design by Evan Twohy.

    Because after you have read this book, you, Good Sir, will know how to be a pro athlete. And pro athletes don't need books. Or strong family bonds. Or any of that stupid crap. Not when they have ready access to millions of dollars and scores of smoking hot chicks with questionable judgment. This book will be all you require to cast aside your boring life as some jackass who cruises around bookstores hoping to score grad-school trim. With Men with Balls, you will learn how to: Showboat using classical pantomime techniques Figure out whether or not a stripper actually fancies you Emotionally cope from the emotional fallout of rookie year hazing games Find out which free locker room amphetamines will give you a shot of energy, and which will cause you to run down terrified schoolchildren with your Escalade (NOTE: Some do both) Avoid media scrutiny by directing beat writers and columnists to the nearest hot buffet So grab your balls, bookboy. You're about to become a home-run hitting, steroid-injecting, angry-orgy-having Turbostud. They're gonna need a whole ocean just to wash your jock.

    Note: These texting fails contain profanity, not for children.When are people going to learn that autocorrect can't be trusted? With FAILS like these, we actually hope that's not for a long time.This book complies 101 of the funniest, most viral and cringeworthy autocorrect screenshots to date.Guaranteed to put you on the floor laughing!

    You’ll be comforted and inspired by these miraculous stories about messages from heaven and love that doesn’t die.When our loved ones leave this world, our connection with them does not end. Their physical presence may be gone, but not their spirit. They send us signs from beyond, come to us in dreams, or deliver messages to us in a variety of surprising and heartwarming ways. You’ll find comfort and inspiration in these miraculous true accounts by ordinary people who have had extraordinary experiences. Read about answered prayers, divine messengers, guardian angels, premonitions, and unexplainable coincidences. This collection will comfort and inspire anyone who has lost a loved one. It will deepen your faith, renew your hope, and open your eyes to the miracles around you.

    In a millisecond, her halo crumbles and she has a moment so crazed it is forever known as the one…The Mother of All Meltdowns. The following anthology was written by women who have had their moments. Together we have experienced the anguish and frustration of the adult-sized tantrum. We have shed the tears, dropped to our knees in agony, and asked the age-old question, “Why me?” From poop-decorated rooms to having our liquid gold scrutinized and confiscated by TSA, we’re not afraid to share our collection of thirty tell-all stories. We are survivalists and know that within every meltdown there is a silver lining.