Can sit naked in front of book without fear of radiation 9. Reader not distracted by Dave's awful haircut 8. Can be readily enjoyed in Amish households 7. If you fall asleep while reading the book you won't wake up to fat weather guy wishing Happy Birthday to one hundred-year-olds 6. Can use your imagination to picture lists being read aloud by handsome actor George Peppard 5. Origami! Origami! Origami! 4. Can be enjoyed by inmates who have lost their TV privileges 3. Carrying book around proudly announces to rest of world, "I can read large print!" 2. Easier to shoplift than 26-inch Trinitron Stereo Sony 1. Any book is better than Dave's TV show

    Until now, those stories have been unpublished and unavailable for others to read but - due to popular demand - he has compiled them in this collection. Included within this collection: Some Drabbles To Get You Started Under The Safe House (novella) Room To Breathe (novella) The First Cuddle (short story) Santa’s Secret (short story) Smoking Kills (short story) Needles (short story) Cold (short story) Sleeping Dogs (short story) Ugly (short story) About the author: Matt Shaw is the published author, and film director, of over 200 stories including his infamous black cover range of extreme horrors. In those titles he is known for pushing boundaries and has been nominated for multiple awards within the "splatterpunk" genre but do not be fooled - Shaw isn't only capable of writing the extremes. His dark psychological horrors are known for getting under the skin of the readers, causing both sleepless nights and restless dreams... PRAISE FOR THE AUTHOR “There is a ferocity about Matt Shaw's writing that is both welcome and also necessary when it comes to horror.” - Shaun Hutson, author of "Slugs" Categories for "UNDER THE SAFE HOUSE & OTHER STORIES" - Horror - Psychological Fiction - Depression - Grief - Bullying - Suspense horror

    But that's only the beginning! Once the riddle is solved, they still have to get past a pride of lions, a humongous herd of rampaging wildebeests, and one very hungry Masai warrior. Polar Bears Past BedtimeThe Magic Tree House transportss Jack and Annie to the freezing Arctic. There, they must solve the final riddle to become master librarians. But it's not going to be easy--especially when they have cracking ice, a seal hunter, and a prodigious polar bear to deal with. Will they be able to solve the riddle before they get iced themselves?

    His quiet, thoughtful exterior hides a complex mind, and a fierce determination to see justice done. Like many of us, sometimes he has to look his demons in the eye, to keep fighting the good fight.This digital box set contains the fifth, sixth, and seventh mysteries in this best-selling series:The Case of the Missing Letter: The priceless Satterthwaite Desk has found its way to the island of Jersey and is on display at the local museum. When a dead body turns up on the museum’s grounds, a turbulent family drama becomes an official police inquiry. Detective Inspector Graham, along with his recently lauded investigative team, must untangle the mystery. But the trail of scandal and deceit soon spills out of the museum, and leads into the darkest corners of the island and beyond.The Case of the Pretty Lady: When a devastating hurricane surges toward the quiet island of Jersey, Detective Inspector Graham quickly finds his life turned upside down. In the wake of the storm, the body of a missing scientist washes ashore. A crime this diabolical takes teamwork to solve, and the Inspector enlists the aid of his three loyal and beloved officers. But are four heads really better than one?The Case of the Forsaken Child: Plagued by devastating memories, Detective Inspector David Graham can’t seem to escape the shadow of anger and guilt clouding his heart. When an undercover cop confides in Graham that her cover is blown, he uncharacteristically underreacts. Soon afterward, when she is killed in a hit-and-run, Graham's feelings of guilt bubble to the surface. If only he had done more…Grab a hot cup of tea and dive into this boxed set quintessentially British mystery series today.

    As the Son of Sam and a scorching heat wave plague New York City, Laila Levin, a Jewish sociologist from Long Island, meets Dr. Eduardo Quintana while giving a speech on the epidemic problem of teenage pregnancies. Laila is relationship-shy after a disastrous marriage, and Eduardo has never completely recovered from his high school sweetheart’s desertion. He is finishing up a residency in New York City and plans to open a family practice near his hometown in New Mexico.The unlikely pair share strong family values and an interest in helping prevent teen pregnancy. Their mutual passion is so intense it stuns them both. After a brief courtship, Eduardo persuades Laila to accompany him to his family ranch near Española, New Mexico, a rural area with one of the highest teenage pregnancy rates in North America.  Once in New Mexico, Laila is blatantly rejected by Sylvia, Eduardo’s controlling mama. Sylvia desperately wants Eduardo to marry Violet, his high school sweetheart. Violet has just returned to New Mexico after a failed flight attendant career, and a walk on the dark side of Hollywood. Her mama and Sylvia cook up a plan to get rid of Laila and reunite their children. The Quintanas hold a large pig roast and invite a menagerie of tattooed cousins, rodeo stars, and mariachis, where the drop-dead gorgeous Violet makes a grand entrance.In the midst of the pandemonium that results, a shocking family secret is revealed, and Laila and Eduardo’s love for each other is severely tested. Can their relationship survive the fierce clash of cultures, the murderous intentions of a Son of Sam copycat who has stalked Laila from New York City, and their own uncertainties about the upheavals that their union will cause in their lives?

    Get a sneak peek inside four of the coolest chapter book series around in this special ebook sampler! Meet the zany characters of My Weird School #1: Miss Daisy Is Crazy by Dan Gutman; travel the world with Flat Stanley's Worldwide Adventures #1: The Mount Rushmore Calamity by Jeff Brown; laugh out loud with Roscoe Riley Rules #1: Never Glue Your Friends to Chairs by Katherine Applegate; and discover the magic with Fairy Blossoms #1: Daisy and the Magic Lesson by Suzanne Williams.

    The author has put together promising stories for every alphabet that are guaranteed to scare you out of your wits and question the presence of the supernatural.Pick up the book as the night crawls by for feeling those chills creeping up your skin and your heart beating out of your chest.

    He's confronted the HOA. He's even taken on Santa himself. He doesn't usually win. These are the tales of the Dumb White Husband and they are all available here in this collected edition.This handsome volume includes:Dumb White Husband vs. the Grocery Store - John would rather sit and watch the game, but his wife needs some things at the store. Can he complete the list and get back in time to see the end of the game?Dumb White Husband vs. Halloween - Every Halloween, Chris has the scariest house on the block and gives out the best candy. But, this year, someone is showing him up and he'll stop at nothing to find out who.Dumb White Husband vs. Santa - Erik has planned the perfect Christmas for his family. The plan is foolproof, bulletproof and flame retardant. Nothing can undo the hours of planning and preparation. Nothing except maybe odd-shaped packages, ill-timed fruitcakes or an errant neighborhood Santa Claus.Dumb White Husband vs. the Tooth Fairy - Erik always has a plan and he's sure he would have figured out the whole Tooth Fairy thing eventually. But, when his three-year-old son takes a frisbee to the mouth, he's forced to speed things up. Between neighborhood kids with big mouths and unhelpful dentists he's going to need to improvise. Will he bend to the pressure of inflation? Will he get caught in the act? And, what do you do with those teeth anyway?Dumb White Husband for President (A novella) - There comes a time in every man's life when he must stand for the things he believes in. John doesn't believe in bagging his grass. So, when a new allergy-prone neighbor gets the HOA to require it, there's only one thing he can do - run for President of The Creeks of Sage Valley Phase II.John, Chris and Erik put aside most of their differences to run a campaign that they hope will see John elected as President and end the meddling of the rule-loving new kid on the block. Will they succeed? It's doubtful.

    Cooper Silwood, precise in attire, composed in appearance, and punctual as usual to the minute, walked into his room on the first floor of 176 New Square, Lincoln's Inn, where were the offices of Eversleigh, Silwood and Eversleigh, the well-known and long-established firm of solicitors of which he was a partner. He was met, as was customary, on his entrance by the head-clerk, John Williamson, who had already opened and sorted out methodically the letters received over-night. An admirable specimen of his class, Williamson generally wore an air of great imperturbability, but this morning his face had a troubled expression. "Anything special, Mr. Williamson?" asked Silwood quietly, putting away his hat and gloves.

    From the painted faces of a child's nightmare to discovering what we really put in our bodies in the name of health. Here are 10 tales to read with the light on.TALE #1 - "Roll up, Roll up"TALE #2 - "Late Shift"TALE #3 - "You call that music?"TALE #4 - "Whose face is this anyway?"TALE #5 - "Pink Bow"TALE #6 - "Careful what you wish for"TALE #7 - "Recycling can be hazardous to your health"TALE #8 - "Mommy's little soldier"TALE #9 - "Trick or Treat"TALE #10 - "You are what you eat"

    After watching it, one of them vanishes...A heart transplant recipient gets much more than he bargained for when he digs into his donor's sinister past...Mourning the death of their son, a young couple is plunged into madness after encountering something otherworldly in the wilderness...DREAMS IN BLACK STATIC is a collection of eight terrifying stories by Ambrose Ibsen, author of The Haunting of Beacon Hill and Asylum. The tales included are:"Me and Mr. Ray" **"Decatur Road" **"Dreams in Black Static" **"Distortional Addict" **"Trim" **"Subterrane Dream" **"Orchard""The Uncanny" **** = Appearing in print for the first time

    Love, laughter, and occasional tears - no need to turn on the Hallmark Channel this winter. Snuggle up with this feel-good anthology instead!Warning: reading this anthology may cause cravings for cider sugar donuts, French toast, pimento cheese, cherry cola, and maple syrup ice-cream, as well as happy ever afters

    The twist in the tale comes with themurder of a well-known man in the Mumbai finance circle. Roy is hired bythe self made tycoon Jayesh Kumar to probe the case. While Roy isexcited at the chance at redemption, he fails to understand why hebecame the chosen one.What looks at first an open and shut case, quite rapidly evolves into a taleof deceit and revenge. Roy must take care not to fall for the suspect, andnot to see things as they appear. As his personal life gets tied to thesuccess of the case, the question becomes, not whether he can havefaith in strangers, but whether he can trust his friends.Inspired from real life cases, The Monsoon Murders is afast-paced detective novel, taking the Indian crime fiction genre tomysterious depths.

    Hephaestus Books represents a new publishing paradigm, allowing disparate content sources to be curated into cohesive, relevant, and informative books. To date, this content has been curated from Wikipedia articles and images under Creative Commons licensing, although as Hephaestus Books continues to increase in scope and dimension, more licensed and public domain content is being added. We believe books such as this represent a new and exciting lexicon in the sharing of human knowledge. This particular book is a collaboration focused on Malazan Book of the Fallen.More info: The Malazan Book of the Fallen is an epic fantasy series written by Canadian author Steven Erikson, published in ten volumes beginning with the novel Gardens of the Moon. As of August 2009, nine novels in the series have been published leaving only the final volume forthcoming. Erikson's series is complex with a wide scope, and presents the narratives of a large cast of characters. In 2005, Esslemont began publishing his own series of five novels set in the same world, beginning with Night of Knives. Although Esslemont's books are published under a different series title - Novels of the Malazan Empire - Esslemont and Erikson collaborated on the storyline for the entire fifteen-book project and Esslemont's novels are considered as canonical and integral to the series as Erikson's own.

    Joiner, Jr. comes a great new action-packed Western adventure. How does a man become one of the fastest guns in the old West? Ride with Jake Jackson as he roots out evil, brings peace to the Old West—and fights for what’s right! This is a man who isn't afraid to fire the six-shooter in his hand! Jake Jackson’s white family were killed when he was a baby by a Comanche war party. Jake’s red family raised him as White Wolf, Comanche warrior. He became a celebrated warrior of the tribe. When the Comanche were forced onto a reservation by the U.S. military and the decimation of the buffalo herd, Jake transitioned to the white world and became known as the fastest gun on the western frontier. Grab your copy today!