Wake his kid brother Andy up, get tormented on the school bus by the cool kids, try to avoid them while in school. Except it's Field Trip Day to the Science Museum, and now he's stuck with the meanest kids in seventh grade all day! But then the bus breaks down, so he doesn't even get to do anything cool at the science museum. It's okay, because an industrial accident brings science to Todd and his friends in the form of a zombie apocalypse. When the bus driver abandons them in the middle of a zombie outbreak, Todd, his brother Andy, his best friend Tarik, and their tomboy friend Mikayla take shelter in the first place they can find - an adult novelty store. What can you find in an adult toy store to fight zombies? Well…let's just say that the field trip was pretty educational, even if the kids never made it to the museum! Shingles is the comedy horror series from the gang that brings you the Authors & Dragons podcast. Like the podcast, these books are rated Not Safe For Anything.

    Brownstone books 13-18 (including Vax Humana, One Epic Ring, Spontaneous Justice, Shadow of the Ring, The Horsemen Gather, War of the Four Worlds)Vax Humana: James was raised by some good men. What would have happened if twisted cultists like the Brotherhood had found him instead of Fathers McCartney and Thomas? It's time to find out more about the Unbelievable Mr. Brownstone.James isn't from Earth or Oriceran. Where he is from has been a question for years.Will we find out now, or will those who seek to kill what James can become win in the end? One Epic Ring: “But you haven’t taken brain damage. I don’t want to have to take the time to get to know you again. The first time was exhausting enough...” Brownstone accepts a simple job and pisses off the most dangerous criminal in LA.Shay is approached by a powerful billionaire, one who knows her past.Now, Brownstone is ready to provide a beat down, but Shay is asking him for help. Does he stay in LA or fly (something he doesn't like to do) to Cambodia? Spontaneous Justice There is nothing to fear but the Vax Forerunner himself. Or is that something only aliens fear? Brownstone is at to a fever pitch to understand Shay and create something epic, so he makes a decision to ask someone hundreds of years old.The fight of his life and for his life is about to occur. Will he have a future when all is said and done? Shadow of the Ring James achieved something epic with his proposal. Now it is Shay’s turn. In planning the wedding, the tomb raider soon finds she sympathizes with what James had to go through. How does someone top something so special?The world’s mightiest class-six bounty hunter believes he’s conquered his amulet. The symbiont’s dark whispers no longer push him out of control, but a new enemy has decided LA should be his stomping grounds and threatens to break through James’ hard-earned discipline. The Horsemen Gather Barbecue is life.  Everything else is just details.With his life settling into a comfortable routine and the criminals of Los Angeles finally accepting his power, James ponders a future of family and food rather than kicking bounties through walls.  Can a bounty hunter be happy as a pitmaster? James’ idle thoughts of retirement are put on hold when a rogue group of government agents decides to go after the man they feel is the greatest threat to the country.  War of the Four Worlds The government and the underworld have finally learned their lesson about not taking on James Brownstone, but some enemies will never learn.  Some enemies can only be destroyed. James and Shay’s wedding is fast approaching, as is the bounty hunter’s semi-retirement. He’s ready to replace butt-kicking with barbecue, convinced he can have a life filled with something other than constant violence.

    He’s in love with his work colleague Melanie and his only friend Gary is a conspiracy theory nut. His life is going nowhere until he has a Near Death Experience - though Death thinks of it as a Near Dave Experience. He discovers gifts he never knew he possessed and a world he never dreamed existed. A world where the Grim Reaper is a hard drinking, grumpy Billy Joel fan and the undead are bored, lonely and dangerous. This box set contains the first 3 stories in the How To Be Dead series: How To Be Dead Paper Cuts Old Haunts They tell the story of Death and his office staff protecting humanity from ghosts, zombies, vampires and medium-sized apocalypses. After a nice cup of tea and a biscuit. “Dave Turner is a funny man and ‘How To Be Dead’ is a brilliant read.” “If Neil Gaiman and Simon Pegg sat down to write a story together they might come up with something like this.” “Hilarious and unexpectedly moving.” “Laugh out loud funny… It’s been a while since an author has made me laugh more than Pratchett does.”

    Five years ago, dateless dork Bill Ryder somehow saved the world, banishing magic and monsters to the shadows. He thought it was over, that he was finished with that life. Too bad for him, shit’s about to get surreal again. Now the impossible has happened. His goddaughter is conjuring fireballs from thin air and two vampires have shown up at his doorstep looking to kick his ass. A crazed group of ex-wizards are hell-bent on forcing the door between worlds open, intent on letting the nightmares back in, and only Bill and his friends stand in their way. Join him in this hilarious tale of a world teetering on the brink of anarchy and the unlikely hero who’s not afraid to look the madness in the eye and flip it both fingers.----------Bill the vampire is back in Strange Days – Bill of the Dead 1 –the eagerly awaited sequel to the bestselling Tome of Bill horror comedy series. Click BUY NOW to start enjoying this bloody good time. If you haven’t already, be sure to check out Bill’s adventures in the complete Tome of Bill series: Bill the Vampire (book 1) Night Stalker (series adventure) Scary Dead Things (book 2) The Mourning Woods (book 3) Holier Than Thou (book 4) Sunset Strip (series adventure) Goddamned Freaky Monsters (book 5) Half A Prayer (book 6) The Wicked Dead (book 7) Shining Fury (series adventure) The Last Coven (book 8)

     A short story in the Oddjobs universe that tries to answer the age-old question: what Christmas present do you get for the demon who has everything?

    Instead, the wizard transforms them into various accursed forms and locks them away in his castle. His halls are filled with his collection of fallen heroes and defeated villains.It’s Nessy’s duty to tend this castle. It’s a lot of work, but she takes pride in housekeeping talents that keep the castle from collapsing into chaos. But when Margle suddenly dies, everything begins to unravel. Nessy finds herself surrounded by monsters, curses, a door that should never be opened, and one very deadly dark wizardess.Nessy doesn’t have might or magic on her side; she’s just a kobold: short, furry, and sensible. It would be smarter to walk away, but taking care of the castle is Nessy’s job, and that’s just what she intends to do.If only she could find time to polish the silver while beating back the forces of darkness.

    

    Supervillains, heroes, and monsters are a common part of the world he inhabits. Yet, after the death of his hometown's resident superhero, he gains the amazing gift of the late champion's magical cloak. Deciding he prefers to be rich rather than good, Gary embarks on a career as Merciless: The Supervillain Without Mercy. But is he evil enough to be a villain in America's most crime-ridden city? Gary soon finds himself surrounded by a host of the worst of Falconcrest City's toughest criminals. Supported by his long-suffering wife, his ex-girlfriend turned professional henchwoman, and a has-been evil mastermind, Gary may end up being not the hero they want but the villain they need.

    He made his decision and has been seeking redemption ever since. Is it possible for a vampire, who has done unspeakable deeds, to change his inherent nature enough to go to Heaven once he takes the big sleep?As if by divine intervention, our witty anti-hero stumbles across his potential salvation in the form of Father Thomes Philseep. Only problem is the holy man has been battling evil entities, like John, his entire life. Can a preternatural being convince a warrior of the Light to help him cleanse his soiled soul — or does an eternity in the abyss of Hell await the abomination? Most importantly, did he leave the oven on?

    Each story is unique in its horror but all should be read with the lights on and the shadows kept at bay, because some stories tend to stay with you even after the book is closed.From established authors, to people putting pen to paper for the first time.Books of Horror presents its inaugural Community Anthology.

    Other than that things are just peachy.Someone has stolen the Grim Reaper's head and Blunt has been told to find it. In a new city where the rules of the living don't apply Blunt's up to his neck in the brown stuff and he's never been much of a swimmer. With the aid of a woman who keeps turning involuntarily invisible, a journalist who hasn't written an article since she died, and a bureaucrat who can't say no to anyone, Blunt's got to stop whoever is stealing the heads of the city's elite.As he begins his investigations he finds things aren't all they seem. Who are the Gloomwood Youth Order? What do you call the murder of someone already dead? Why are people having their heads chopped off? And what is in the hot dogs? With time slipping away he needs to learn what makes the city tick before there's no city left.

    Entering a world of mysterious powers and nightmarish consequences, Chris realizes the secret belief of every teenage boy- that his wang has the power to change the world. The Monkey's Penis is the third installment in the terrifying Shingles series, and once again readers with weak hearts or bladders are advised to read on at their own risk...

    They're an iconic part of history's most celebrated birth. But what do we really know about the Three Kings of the Nativity, besides the fact that they followed a star to Bethlehem bearing strange gifts? The Bible has little to say about this enigmatic trio. But leave it to Seth Grahame-Smith, the brilliant and twisted mind behind Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Pride and Prejudice and Zombies to take a little mystery, bend a little history, and weave an epic tale. In Grahame-Smith's telling, the so-called "Three Wise Men" are infamous thieves, led by the dark, murderous Balthazar. After a daring escape from Herod's prison, they stumble upon the famous manger and its newborn king. The last thing Balthazar needs is to be slowed down by young Joseph, Mary and their infant. But when Herod's men begin to slaughter the first born in Judea, he has no choice but to help them escape to Egypt. It's the beginning of an adventure that will see them fight the last magical creatures of the Old Testament; cross paths with biblical figures like Pontius Pilate and John the Baptist; and finally deliver them to Egypt. It may just be the greatest story never told.

    But her Most Wanted List is going to take a little extra effort. She’ll have to embrace her powers and up her game to take down new threats, Not to mention deal with the troll that’s adopted her. All signs point to a serious threat lurking just beyond sight, pulling the strings to put the forces of good in harm’s way. Magic or mundane, you break the law, and Diana’s gonna find you, tag you and bring you in. Watch out magical baddies, this agent can level the playing field. It’s all in a day’s work for the newest Federal Agent of Magic. Agents of Mayhem: New city, new troubles. It’s going to take all the magic Special Agent Diana Sheen can gather to keep the peace. But will it be enough?Diana runs a secret Federal agency that combats magic mixed with wicked. Her team cleans up the worst streets, disguised as bounty hunters. Challenge #1 is a small troll and his ongoing obsession with action films. Good thing he’s a helluva fighter too. Still, is it enough? Dark magic has a new twist born from an ancient cult and they’re playing for keeps.Good thing Agent Sheen knows how to play rough. It’s all in a day’s work at the secret bureau of the Federal Agents of Magic. Counter Ops: Special Agent Diana Sheen runs a secret agency… …locked squarely in the crosshairs of a magical conspiracy far greater than she’d imagined.The bad guys are seeking artifacts to increase their power, and it feels like they’re leading up to something big. Can she stop them in time? The attacks are getting personal. Other bureaus have taken heavy losses, and only her team’s magical abilities have kept them from the same fate.That includes a troll uncovering magical do-gooders or an acerbic Drow learning to use her magic.Everything is getting better, including their gear thanks to Kayleigh.But is better good enough? No way to tell, except by putting boot to tail.Magic or mundane, you hurt people in their town, and FAM is gonna bring you down. It’s all in a day’s work at the newest bureau of the Federal Agents of Magic. Agents of Chaos: Special Agent Diana Sheen has been targeted… …by magical villains determined to bring her and her agency down.The bad guys have something big planned, and like a storm over the horizon, she can feel it coming but doesn’t know how bad it will turn out to be. The answer? Really, really bad. Diana and her team will need to be at the top of their game to survive. The heat is rising, but Diana won’t abandon her responsibilities. No way, no how.

    Dave. So, we're pretty much doomed.The Chronicles of Dave collects two great Dave Hooper adventures in one volume. In A PROTOCOL FOR MONSTERS we get the real story of Super Dave's embiggening, not the drunken, drug addled lies he told us in EMERGENCE. And in A SOUL FULL OF GUNS we learn the origin story of the only human being capable of kicking Dave's ass – the super-powered Colonel Karin Varatchevksy. Sent by the Russian military to spy on the US, she might he only thing that saves it from the worst superhero ever.If you love your fantasy action ludicrously violent, and your heroes hilariously flawed, this collection is for you.