All of your favorite artists are represented in these pages—from Bon Jovi and Green Day to Miley Cyrus, Beyoncé, and beyond. Already a smash sensation on the Internet—the Tumblr page has 20,000+ followers—Pop Sonnets has been featured by the A.V. Club, BuzzFeed, and Vanity Fair, among many others. More than half of these pop sonnets are exclusive to this collection and have never been published in any form.

    Fast-forward ten years and the funny man has married and become the family man. The Guy’s Guide to Surviving Pregnancy, Childbirth, and the First Year of Fatherhood—Crider’s candid, down-to-earth account of his transformation—proves that even without much sleep, he has kept his sense of humor completely intact.From the moment he hears the unexpected news that the pregnancy test is positive to the end of his son’s first year of life, Michael Crider is awed, anxious, and all-too-human. In between these milestones, he endures the aches and pains of his wife’s pregnancy (which had a clear impact on his own bodily comfort), swallows his pride when bunny wallpaper replaces his beloved Budweiser mirror, has a short and only partially-appreciated stint as her labor coach on the Big Day, and experiences every one of his son’s “firsts” as though they were his own. Honest, informative, hilarious, and heartwarming, The Guy’s Guide to Surviving Pregnancy, Childbirth, and the First Year of Fatherhood is a must-read for all new parents.

    He makes movies, writes comics, owns a store, and now he s built a podcasting empire with his friends and family, including a wife who s way out of his league. So here s some tough shit: Kevin Smith has cracked the code. Or, he s just cracked. "Tough Sh*t" is the dirty business that Kevin has been digesting for 41 years and now, he s ready to put it in "your" hands. Smear this shit all over yourself, because this is your blueprint (or brownprint) for success. Kev takes you through some big moments in his life to help you live "your" days in as Gretzky a fashion as you can: going where the puck is "gonna" be. Read all about how a zero like Smith managed to make ten movies with no discernible talent, and how when he had everything he thought he d ever want, he decided to blow up his own career. Along the way, Kev shares stories about folks who inspired him (like George Carlin), folks who befuddled him (like Bruce Willis), and folks who let him jerk off onto their legs (like his beloved wife, Jen).So make this your daily reader. Hell, read it on the toilet if you want. Just make sure you grab the bowl and push, because you re about to take one "Tough Sh*t."

    Over the years, Miss Piggy has gleaned, glommed, and garnered wisdom about what's wrong with everyone else and what's right with her. And now, in the latest book from the Muppets, Miss Piggy is ready to share all of her best advice on love, fashion, career, attitude, and her secrets of diva-dom! And as an added bonus, it will help release your inner diva, so you can get what you deserve and give others exactly what they deserve! A few of the idiotic things men do...HE'S JUST NOT READY TO COMMIT ? Let's begin with one of men and frogdom's all-time idiotic offenses.You give him the pleasure of your company (plus untold hours of prep time) and in return he's not willing to commit to anything. Mention a romantic getaway, a steady and exclusive dating policy, a long-term relationship, marriage?and he runs for the exits! WHAT VOUS NEED TO DO: The best defense is a good offense, which means that you must never give up trying to make him commit. Remember: Never stop being offensive.HE'S STATUS OBSESSED -- It's all about the label, the fancy car, the platinum-encrusted watch, the vacation place in Gstaad, the showy perks. WHAT VOUS NEED TO DO: Give moi his number.HE'S A NARCISSIST - This guy can usually be found at the gym defining his triceps, biceps, bicuspids, you name it. And when he's not pumping iron, he's primping in front of the mirror-tweezing, conditioning, moisturizing and otherwise invading your personal grooming space. WHAT VOUS NEED TO DO: Ask yourself if he's such a hunk that he's worth it. If so, get more mirrors. If not, dump him?but get more mirrors anyway. After all, narcissism isn't a bad thing if it's about vous.

    They gleefully whip the media into a frenzy over a fake teen drug crisis; they post offensive messages on Facebook memorial pages, traumatizing grief-stricken friends and family; they use unabashedly racist language and images. They take pleasure in ruining a complete stranger's day and find amusement in their victim's anguish. In short, trolling is the obstacle to a kinder, gentler Internet. To quote a famous Internet meme, trolling is why we can't have nice things online.Or at least that's what we have been led to believe. In this provocative book, Whitney Phillips argues that trolling, widely condemned as obscene and deviant, actually fits comfortably within the contemporary media landscape. Trolling may be obscene, but, Phillips argues, it isn't all that deviant. Trolls' actions are born of and fueled by culturally sanctioned impulses -- which are just as damaging as the trolls' most disruptive behaviors.Phillips describes, for example, the relationship between trolling and sensationalist corporate media -- pointing out that for trolls, exploitation is a leisure activity; for media, it's a business strategy. She shows how trolls, "the grimacing poster children for a socially networked world," align with social media. And she documents how trolls, in addition to parroting media tropes, also offer a grotesque pantomime of dominant cultural tropes, including gendered notions of dominance and success and an ideology of entitlement. We don't just have a trolling problem, Phillips argues; we have a culture problem. This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things isn't only about trolls; it's about a culture in which trolls thrive.

    Color illustrations recreate popular features and episodes from the first two years of The Muppet show.

    Are you a witless cretin with no reason to live? Would you like to know more about every piece of knowledge ever? Do you have cash? Then congratulations, because just in time for the death of the print industry as we know it comes the final book ever published, and the only one you will ever need: The Onion's compendium of all things known.Replete with an astonishing assemblage of facts, illustrations, maps, charts, threats, blood, and additional fees to edify even the most simple-minded book-buyer, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE is packed with valuable information-such as the life stages of an Aunt; places to kill one's self in Utica, New York; and the dimensions of a female bucket, or "pail." With hundreds of entries for all 27 letters of the alphabet, THE ONION BOOK OF KNOWN KNOWLEDGE must be purchased immediately to avoid the sting of eternal ignorance.

    Milk and Vine is truly a delight for the sensations, bringing back the riveting quotes we all laughed at together as a united internet community. From Ms. Kiesha to diesel jeans, this book encapsulates the most entertaining, nostalgic vines that are sure to have you laughing again. Keep the fire of authentic comedy ablaze in your home, and purchase a copy of Milk and Vine today.

    Whether you’re deciding which smart phone to purchase or which politician to believe, you think you are a rational being whose every decision is based on cool, detached logic, but here’s the truth: You are not so smart. You’re just as deluded as the rest of us--but that’s okay, because being deluded is part of being human. Growing out of David McRaney’s popular blog, You Are Not So Smart reveals that every decision we make, every thought we contemplate, and every emotion we feel comes with a story we tell ourselves to explain them, but often these stories aren’t true. Each short chapter--covering topics such as Learned Helplessness, Selling Out, and the Illusion of Transparency--is like a psychology course with all the boring parts taken out.Bringing together popular science and psychology with humor and wit, You Are Not So Smart is a celebration of our irrational, thoroughly human behavior.

    The book is alive and teeming with hundreds of photos, original interviews, and hilarious commentary.Young Frankenstein was made with deep respect for the craft and history of cinema--and for the power of a good schwanzstucker joke. This picture-driven book, written by one of the greatest comedy geniuses of all time, takes readers inside the classic film's marvelous creation story via never-before-seen black and white and color photography from the set and contemporary interviews with the cast and crew, most notably, legendary writer-director Mel Brooks.With access to more than 225 behind-the-scenes photos and production stills, and with captions written by Brooks, this book will also rely on interviews with gifted director of photography Gerald Hirschfeld, Academy Award-winning actress Cloris Leachman, and veteran producer Michael Gruskoff.

    Be Very Afraid.From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover:- How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff - How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll - How to Survive an Alien Invasion - How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movieand much, much more. Complete with useful instructions, insane illustrations, and a list of 100 important films to study, How to Survive a Horror Movie is essential reading for prom queens, jocks, teenage babysitters, and anyone employed by a summer camp.

    Featuring 50 common North American birds, such as the White-Breasted Butt Nugget and the Goddamned Canada Goose (or White-Breasted Nuthatch and Canada Goose for the layperson), Matt Kracht identifies all the idiots in your backyard and details exactly why they suck with ink drawings. Each entry is accompanied by facts about a bird's (annoying) call, its (dumb) migratory pattern, its (downright tacky) markings, and more.The essential guide to all things wings with migratory maps, tips for birding, musings on the avian population, and the ethics of birdwatching.

    How Will You Survive? In the apocalyptic world we live in, Mother Nature is angry. Danger waits at every turn, and catastrophes like the Los Angeles sharknados have taught us that we need to be ready for anything. Too many lives have already been lost. But fear not. How to Survive a Sharknado and Other Unnatural Disasters is the first and only comprehensive guide to surviving the very worst that Mother Nature can throw our way. Inside this life-saving reference, you’ll find: • Vital information about dozens of unnatural disasters and ungodly monsters that can injure, maim, or kill you, from arachnoquakes and ice twisters to piranhacondas and mega pythons; • Easy-to-understand survival tips for avoiding a bloody demise; • Inspirational words of wisdom from survivors, including Fin Shepard and April Wexler; • Useful resources, such as the Shepard Survival Assessment Test (S.S.A.T), and much more. With this essential book in hand, you too can be a hero who laughs in the face of calamity while saving friends and family. Or you can just avoid getting savagely ripped apart by a sharktopus. Either way, you’ve been warned. Now be prepared.

    Or April, the Neo-Nazi bringing up her twin daughters Lamb and Lynx (who have just formed a white-power folk group for kids called Prussian Blue), and her youngest daughter, Dresden. For a decade now, Louis Theroux has been making programs about offbeat characters on the fringes of U.S. society. Now he revisits the people who have most intrigued him to try to discover what motivates them, and why they believe the things they believe. From his Las Vegas base (where else?), Theroux calls on these assorted dreamers, schemers, and outlaws--and in the process finds out a little about the workings of his own mind. What does it mean, after all, to be weird, or "to be yourself"? Do we choose our beliefs or do our beliefs choose us? And is there something particularly weird about Americans? America, prepare yourself for a hilarious look in the mirror that has already taken the rest of the English-speaking world by storm: "Paul Theroux's son writes with just as clear an eye for character and place as his father.... And he's funny.... Theroux's final analysis of American weirdness is true and new." -- Literary Review (England)

    The show is so snarky, so smart, and so savvy, that the detective show’s biggest mystery is why more people aren’t watching.This collection of essays on the show’s first two seasons explores the noir roots of Veronica’s blond locks, and the sharp writing and killer plot twists that have catapulted Veronica Mars to the top of smart viewers’ must-watch lists.