Live well, laugh often, love much and share God's blessings. We all know that laughter is the best medicine, and this is true, Laughter is a powerful antidote to stress, pain, and conflict. Nothing works faster or more dependably to bring your mind and body back into balance than a good laugh. Humor lightens your burdens, inspires hopes, connects you to others, and keeps you grounded, focused, and alert. Read our collection of jokes and funny short stories. These jokes and funny stories are collected from different sources in the Internet. Download our book now, and laugh out those stress away. Please note that this book is categorized under Jokes for Adults and may contain some offensive jokes and stories, and it is your discretion as a customer whether to share the jokes and stories with others.

    You'll also receive updates when significant changes are made, as well as the final ebook version. Embedded Android is for Developers wanting to create embedded systems based on Android and for those wanting to port Android to new hardware, or creating a custom development environment. Hackers and moders will also find this an indispensible guide to how Android works.

    It's aimed at developers who might not be quite comfortable with the idea of pointers and static typing.http://openmymind.net/The-Little-Go-B...

     The first ebook in the series, Microsoft Azure Essentials: Fundamentals of Azure, introduces developers and IT professionals to the wide range of capabilities in Azure. The authors - both Microsoft MVPs in Azure - present both conceptual and how-to content for key areas, including: Azure Websites and Azure Cloud Services Azure Virtual Machines Azure Storage Azure Virtual Networks Databases Azure Active Directory Management tools Business scenarios Watch Microsoft Press’s blog and Twitter (@MicrosoftPress) to learn about other free ebooks in the “Microsoft Azure Essentials” series.

    Criminals succeed by exercising enormous creativity, and those defending against them must do the same.Beautiful Security explores this challenging subject with insightful essays and analysis on topics that include:The underground economy for personal information: how it works, the relationships among criminals, and some of the new ways they pounce on their prey How social networking, cloud computing, and other popular trends help or hurt our online security How metrics, requirements gathering, design, and law can take security to a higher level The real, little-publicized history of PGP This book includes contributions from:Peiter "Mudge" Zatko Jim Stickley Elizabeth Nichols Chenxi Wang Ed Bellis Ben Edelman Phil Zimmermann and Jon Callas Kathy Wang Mark Curphey John McManus James Routh Randy V. Sabett Anton Chuvakin Grant Geyer and Brian Dunphy Peter Wayner Michael Wood and Fernando Francisco All royalties will be donated to the Internet Engineering Task Force (IETF).

    This update to the bestselling first edition dives in to cover the exciting new features of the latest release of the Android mobile platform.Providing in-depth coverage of how to build mobile applications using the next major release of the Android SDK, this invaluable resource takes a hands-on approach to discussing Android with a series of projects, each of which introduces a new feature and highlights techniques and best practices to get the most out of Android.The Android SDK is a powerful, flexible, open source platform for mobile devices Shares helpful techniques and best practices to maximize the capabilities of Android Explains the possibilities of Android through the use of a series of detailed projects Demonstrates how to create real-world mobile applications for Android phones Includes coverage of the latest version of Android Providing concise and compelling examples, Professional Android Application Development is an updated guide aimed at helping you create mobile applications for mobile devices running the latest version of Android.

    Demonstrates the programming language's strength as a Web development tool, covering syntax, data types, built-ins, the Python standard module library, and real world examples

    Editors are the subject of adoration and worship, or of scorn and ridicule, depending upon whether the topic of discussion is your editor or someone else's.vi has been the standard editor for close to 30 years. Popular on Unix and Linux, it has a growing following on Windows systems, too. Most experienced system administrators cite vi as their tool of choice. And since 1986, this book has been the guide for vi. However, Unix systems are not what they were 30 years ago, and neither is this book. While retaining all the valuable features of previous editions, the 7th edition of Learning the vi and vim Editors has been expanded to include detailed information on vim, the leading vi clone. vim is the default version of vi on most Linux systems and on Mac OS X, and is available for many other operating systems too. With this guide, you learn text editing basics and advanced tools for both editors, such as multi-window editing, how to write both interactive macros and scripts to extend the editor, and power tools for programmers -- all in the easy-to-follow style that has made this book a classic.Learning the vi and vim Editors includes:A complete introduction to text editing with vi:How to move around vi in a hurry Beyond the basics, such as using buffers vi's global search and replacement Advanced editing, including customizing vi and executing Unix commandsHow to make full use of vim: Extended text objects and more powerful regular expressions Multi-window editing and powerful vim scripts How to make full use of the GUI version of vim, called gvim vim's enhancements for programmers, such as syntax highlighting, folding and extended tags Coverage of three other popular vi clones -- nvi, elvis, and vile -- is also included. You'll find several valuable appendixes, including an alphabetical quick reference to both vi and ex mode commands for regular vi and for vim, plus an updated appendix on vi and the Internet. Learning either vi or vim is required knowledge if you use Linux or Unix, and in either case, reading this book is essential. After reading this book, the choice of editor will be obvious for you too.

    Our world is truly strange that so many good and helpful people find themselves preyed upon by the criminal elements. In case of an emergency or a catastrophe those odds may become even worst. My name is Roy Shepard and I’m a former IDF (Israeli Defense Forces) Special Forces Operator. During my military service, I took part in countless missions behind enemy lines and later trained young cadets as a Master Sergeant. I specialize in weapons training, stealth and camouflage, and Krav-Maga. I’ve been in active reserve duty for the past 20 years and spent much of that time formulating and implementing defense strategies and drills in military bases all over Israel. Highly trained in martial arts, I specialize in Judo, Jiu-Jitsu, Aikido, and Russian Systema—with both hand-to-hand combat and melee weapon handling. I am also an expert marksman with both close-quarters and long-range weapons. The IDF is one of the most effective militaries in the world with proven strategies and tactics that have kept Israel safe for the last 70 years. The harsh reality is that Israel is a small country surrounded by hostile nations that have been intent on destroying it since it was formed in 1948. The IDF has defended Israel in eight full-out wars and fended off many incursions and terrorist attacks. The skills that I’m about to share with you are the same ones used by the IDF Special Forces Operators to stay safe in hostile situations and will allow you to do so as well. Be it fending off a mugger in a dark parking lot or surviving a post-catastrophe scenario. The reality is that we are always only moments away from danger and knowing the exact step-by-step response can be the difference between life, injury, or even death. Using the knowledge in this book you will learn how to avoid, escape, or survive numerous dangerous situations using minimal effort. The number one thing you must remember is that being efficient can save your life. If you don’t take steps to conserve your energy, you will get tired very quickly and may lose the battle. Professional fighters can hold a full combat event for a few seconds and after that they rely solely on technique to survive and accomplish the mission. This book will teach you eight of the most effective techniques to stay safe: 1. Situational awareness 2. Tactical relocation 3. Planning for emergencies 4. Survival self-defense 5. Team roles 6. Communications 7. Fitness 8. Survival tools I look forward to seeing you as part of our community at Prepper Legend and hope you enjoy this book at least as much as I enjoyed writing it. And above all else stay safe! Your friend always, Roy Shepard

    Three epic thru-hikes totalling 5840 miles. Will one Englishman dare to face his fears?Three books in one - Over 800 pages of adventure! Book #1 - The Journey in Between A man at a crossroads. A thousand-mile hike. A life forever changed. Keith Foskett was the definition of restless. Drifting aimlessly, he knew a piece was missing from his life. But when a stranger in a Greek bar tells him about a world-famous pilgrim’s trail, the chance encounter sets Foskett’s life in a new 1,000-mile direction. On El Camino de Santiago, the wanderer copes with extreme temperatures, fake faith healers, and insatiable kleptomaniacs. Threatened with arrest for ‘not sleeping’ and suffering with excruciating blisters, he pushes himself to new limits.Keith Foskett’s travelogues have been shortlisted for Outdoor Book of the Year multiple times by The Great Outdoors magazine. Awash with vivid descriptions and a cast of engaging real-life characters, the author delivers a humorous and mesmerizing tale of adventure and metamorphosis. The Journey in Between is a daring travel memoir. If you like indulging your inner adventurer, taking the less popular fork in the road, and visiting foreign locations, then you’ll love Keith Foskett’s transformative tale.  Book #2 - The Last Englishman A real-life adventurer. A gruelling pan-American trek. Will one Englishman dare to face his fears?Born traveller Keith Foskett had thousands of miles of thru-hiking experience when he prepared for his toughest challenge yet: a gruelling 2,640-mile hike from Mexico to Canada. In a six-month journey along America’s Pacific Crest Trail, he crossed the arid expanses of California’s deserts, the towering peaks of Oregon’s volcanic landscape, and the dense forests of Washington.Battling phobias of bears, snakes, critters and camping in the woods after dark, can Foskett find new ways to achieve his ultimate goal when the worst winter in years bears down on the trail?Veteran storyteller Keith Foskett lets you join him for a trek across the greatest long-distance hiking trail on Earth. With witty humour, astute observations, and a delightful cast of characters, you’ll discover a compelling narrative that turns the travelogue formula on its head. The Last Englishman is an extraordinary travel memoir by an experienced long-distance hiker. If you believe there’s more to life than work, yearn for new horizons and challenges, and believe in overcoming adversity, then you’ll love Keith Foskett’s tale of exploration.  Book #3 - Balancing on Blue One man’s remarkable challenge. 2,000+ miles of unforgiving wilderness. Can he escape the mundane to become a thru-hiker?When this long-distance hiker chose to backpack all 2,180 miles of the Appalachian Trail, he left ordinary life behind for five months. Enduring an incredible test of physical and psychological strength, Foskett was pushed to his limits…Accompanied by an array of eclectic characters – including a drug dealer, a world-champion juggler and a sex-starved Minnesotan – he weaves a route through some of America's wildest landscapes and history, and writes with insight, humour and reflection. Attempting to keep his English sense of humour alive amidst the bumps and bruises, can he survive his journey of self-discovery to emerge victorious?Balancing on Blue is a superb standalone travel memoir. If you like living outside the box, escaping into the wild, and journeying deep into the unknown, then you’ll love this courageous trek.

    It provides all of JavaScript's functionality wrapped in a cleaner, more succinct syntax. In the first book on this exciting new language, CoffeeScript guru Trevor Burnham shows you how to hold onto all the power and flexibility of JavaScript while writing clearer, cleaner, and safer code.CoffeeScript: Accelerated JavaScript Development offers a thorough introduction to this new language, starting from the basics. You'll learn to use time-saving features like list comprehensions and splats, organize your code into modules with extensible classes, and deploy your work to multiple environments. Each chapter is example-driven and includes challenging exercises to push your CoffeeScript know-how further. Through the course of the book, you'll build a fast-paced multiplayer word game-writing both the client (with jQuery) and server (with Node.js) in CoffeeScript. And because the two languages are so deeply intertwined, you'll deepen your understanding of JavaScript along the way. CoffeeScript makes it easier than ever to write powerful, standards-compliant JavaScript code. CoffeeScript: Accelerated JavaScript Development lets you start doing it today.

    My easy to use, simple ideas and techniques have become my trademark. I write easy to use books so people will read them and use the information they contain. The ideas in This Is Your Life, Not A Dress Rehearsal are not theory. They have been used by me and countless others to change our lives.

    Encourage restoration of Joy in the kitchen with these easy recipes.

    Yes, it is really that good." "This is going to be my 'go to book' when I've had a bad day!" Please Note: Some profanity, not for children!

    I realize that sounds more like a line out of an existential movie — maybe Waiting for Godot or a screenplay by Sartre — than a statement about HTML5. But it’s really the truth: most of the people using HTML5 are treating it as HTML4+, or even worse, HTML4 (and some stuff they don’t use). The result? A real delay in the paradigm shift that HTML5 is almost certain to bring. It’s certainly not time to look away, because by the time you look back, you may have missed something really important: a subtle but important transition centered around HTML5.