Facing Codependence: What It Is, Where It Comes from, How It Sabotages Our Lives


Pia Mellody - 1989
    Mellody sets forth five primary adult symptoms of this crippling condition, then traces their origin to emotional, spiritual, intellectual, physical and sexual abuses that occur in childhood. Central to Mellody's approach is the concept that the codependent adult's injured inner child needs healing. Recovery from codependence, therefore, involves clearing up the toxic emotions left over from these painful childhood experiences.

The Deepest Well: Healing the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Adversity


Nadine Burke Harris - 2018
    Nadine Burke Harris was already known as a crusading physician delivering targeted care to vulnerable children. But it was Diego — a boy who had stopped growing after a sexual assault — who galvanized her journey to uncover the connections between toxic stress and lifelong illnesses.The news of Burke Harris’s research is just how deeply our bodies can be imprinted by ACEs—adverse childhood experiences like abuse, neglect, parental addiction, mental illness, and divorce. Childhood adversity changes our biological systems, and lasts a lifetime.  For anyone who has faced a difficult childhood, or who cares about the millions of children who do, the scientific insight and innovative, acclaimed health interventions in The Deepest Well represent hope for preventing lifelong illness for those we love and for generations to come​.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families: Creating a Nurturing Family in a Turbulent World


Stephen R. Covey - 1996
    Covey presents a practical and philosophical guide to solving the problems--large and small, mundane and extraordinary―that confront all families and strong communities. By offering revealing anecdotes about ordinary people as well as helpful suggestions about changing everyday behavior, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families shows how and why to have family meetings, the importance of keeping promises, how to balance individual and family needs, and how to move from dependence to interdependence. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families is an invaluable guidebook to the welfare of families everywhere.

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma


Bessel van der Kolk - 2014
    Veterans and their families deal with the painful aftermath of combat; one in five Americans has been molested; one in four grew up with alcoholics; one in three couples have engaged in physical violence. Such experiences inevitably leave traces on minds, emotions, and even on biology. Sadly, trauma sufferers frequently pass on their stress to their partners and children. Renowned trauma expert Bessel van der Kolk has spent over three decades working with survivors. In The Body Keeps the Score, he transforms our understanding of traumatic stress, revealing how it literally rearranges the brain’s wiring—specifically areas dedicated to pleasure, engagement, control, and trust. He shows how these areas can be reactivated through innovative treatments including neurofeedback, mindfulness techniques, play, yoga, and other therapies. Based on Dr. van der Kolk’s own research and that of other leading specialists, The Body Keeps the Score offers proven alternatives to drugs and talk therapy—and a way to reclaim lives.

The Wizard of Oz and Other Narcissists: Coping with the One-Way Relationship in Work, Love, and Family


Eleanor D. Payson - 2002
    Reclaim your life from the one-way street! Disguised as high self-esteem, narcissism is actually a destructive form of self-love or extreme self-absorption."

The Bingo Theory: A revolutionary guide to love, life, and relationships.


Mimi Ikonn - 2016
    Men are not from Mars and Women are not from Venus. We are all from Planet Earth.The traditional view of masculine and feminine energy is very black and white. If you are a woman, you are considered to be feminine, and similarly if you are a man, you are considered to be masculine. This outdated and inadequate mindset has lead to a tremendous imbalance both internally in our lives, as well as externally in our world.The Bingo Theory breaks through this traditional gender-polarized idea of a man and a woman, by providing a new fresh view and understanding of masculine and feminine energies and the important role both of these energies play in our lives.Every single human on this planet has two energies living within them: the masculine and the feminine. The masculine energy helps us to operate in the outer world; it makes us strong, independent, and confident. The feminine energy, on the other hand, helps us love and connect to others. It's what makes us creative and intuitive.In this book you will learn how to balance the masculine and feminine energies within you so that you can be a Bingo. What is a Bingo? A Bingo is a winning combination of both masculine and feminine energies. This inner balance is crucial in order to have a better relationship with yourself, attract your perfect romantic partner, improve your existing relationship, as well as have a fulfilling career.In this book you will:* Discover the groundbreaking medical research that has proven that, biologically, we are all a blend of masculine and feminine strengths.* Take a quiz that helps you to determine if your strength energy is masculine or feminine. This alone is a huge eye opener. It will allow you to see clearly what amazing strengths you posses and will also highlight the areas you need to work on.* Learn simple, actionable tips to help you balance your energies.* Learn how to attract a Bingo relationship if you are single.* Learn how to transform your existing relationships (whether romantic or otherwise) using the principles of masculine and feminine energies.

Gifts Differing: Understanding Personality Type


Isabel Briggs Myers - 1980
    Drawing on concepts originated by Carl Jung, this book distinguishes four categories of personality styles and shows how these qualities determine the way you perceive the world and come to conclusions about what you've seen. It then explains what they mean for your success in school, at a job, in a career and in your personal relationships. For more than 60 years, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) tool has been the most widely used instrument in the world for determining personality type, and for more than 25 years, Gifts Differing has been the preeminent source for understanding it.

Rules of Estrangement: Why Adult Children Cut Ties and How to Heal the Conflict


Joshua Coleman - 2021
    Popular opinion typically tells a one-sided story of parents who got what they deserved or overly entitled adult children who wrongly blame their parents. However, the reasons for estrangement are far more complex and varied. As a result of rising rates of individualism, an increasing cultural emphasis on happiness, growing economic insecurity, and a historically recent perception that parents are obstacles to personal growth, many parents find themselves forever shut out of the lives of their adult children and grandchildren.As a trusted psychologist whose own daughter cut off contact for several years and eventually reconciled, Dr. Joshua Coleman is uniquely qualified to guide parents in navigating these fraught interactions. He helps to alleviate the ongoing feelings of shame, hurt, guilt, and sorrow that commonly attend these dynamics. By placing estrangement into a cultural context, Dr. Coleman helps parents better understand the mindset of their adult children and teaches them how to implement the strategies for reconciliation and healing that he has seen work in his forty years of practice. Rules of Estrangement gives parents the language and the emotional tools to engage in meaningful conversation with their child, the framework to cultivate a healthy relationship moving forward, and the ability to move on if reconciliation is no longer possible.While estrangement is a complex and tender topic, Dr. Coleman's insightful approach is based on empathy and understanding for both the parent and the adult child.

Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse


Shannon Thomas - 2016
    The cryptic nature of psychological abuse involves repetitious mind games played by one individual or a group of people. Psychological abuse leaves no bruises. There are no broken bones. There are no holes in the walls. The bruises, brokenness, and holes are held tightly within the target of the abuse.

Mars and Venus in the Bedroom: A Guide to Lasting Romance and Passion


John Gray - 1995
    Only by fully understanding and accepting these differences can we achieve true, long-lasting intimacy--and great sex. By taking his now famous Mars/Venus themes and applying them to the bedroom, John Gray teaches readers:how men and women can be both satisfied sexually and more aware of their partner's needs and desireshow to rekindle passion and maintain it in a monogamous relationshiphow to communicate sexual needs effectively--and romanticallyhow to apply advanced relationship skills that address the contemporary needs of individuals and couples

You Are Not So Smart: Why You Have Too Many Friends on Facebook, Why Your Memory Is Mostly Fiction, and 46 Other Ways You're Deluding Yourself


David McRaney - 2011
    Whether you’re deciding which smart phone to purchase or which politician to believe, you think you are a rational being whose every decision is based on cool, detached logic, but here’s the truth: You are not so smart. You’re just as deluded as the rest of us--but that’s okay, because being deluded is part of being human. Growing out of David McRaney’s popular blog, You Are Not So Smart reveals that every decision we make, every thought we contemplate, and every emotion we feel comes with a story we tell ourselves to explain them, but often these stories aren’t true. Each short chapter--covering topics such as Learned Helplessness, Selling Out, and the Illusion of Transparency--is like a psychology course with all the boring parts taken out.Bringing together popular science and psychology with humor and wit, You Are Not So Smart is a celebration of our irrational, thoroughly human behavior.

The Awakened Family: A Revolution in Parenting


Shefali Tsabary - 2016
    . . you will be wowed and awed by [Dr. Shefali]." —Oprah WinfreyNew from the New York Times bestselling author of The Conscious Parent comes a radically transformative plan that shows parents how to raise children to be their best, truest selves.What if...?What if I told you that you can put an end to all of your parenting struggles?That you can learn to parent without fear or anxiety?That you can end conflict with your children?That you can create close and connected relationships within your family?…Would you accept this invitation to a revolution in parenting?We all have the capacity to raise children who are highly resilient and emotionally connected. However, many of us are unable to because we are blinded by modern misconceptions of parenting and our own inner limitations. In The Awakened Family, I show you how you can cultivate a relationship with your children so they can thrive; moreover, you can be transformed to a state of greater calm, compassion and wisdom as well.This book will take you on a journey to transcending your fears and illusions around parenting and help you become the parent you always wanted to be: fully present and conscious. It will arm you with practical, hands-on strategies and real-life examples from my experience as a parent and clinical psychologist that show the extraordinary power of being a conscious parent.Everyone in your family is ready to be awakened.Will you take this journey with me?—Shefali

The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward


Daniel H. Pink - 2022
    Pink explains in The Power of Regret. They're a universal and healthy part of being human. And understanding how regret works can help us make smarter decisions, perform better at work and school, and bring greater meaning to our lives.Drawing on research in social psychology, neuroscience, and biology, Pink debunks the myth of the "no regrets" philosophy of life. And using the largest sampling of American attitudes about regret ever conducted as well as his own World Regret Survey--which has collected regrets from more than 15,000 people in 105 countries--he lays out the four core regrets that each of us has. These deep regrets offer compelling insights into how we live and how we can find a better path forward.As he did in his bestsellers Drive, When, and A Whole New Mind, Pink lays out a dynamic new way of thinking about regret and frames his ideas in ways that are clear, accessible, and pragmatic. Packed with true stories of people's regrets as well as practical takeaways for reimagining regret as a positive force, The Power of Regret shows how we can live richer, more engaged lives.

How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving


David RichoDavid Richo - 2002
    Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life:    1.  Attention to the present moment; observing, listening, and noticing all the feelings at play in our relationships.    2.  Acceptance of ourselves and others just as we are.    3.  Appreciation of all our gifts, our limits, our longings, and our poignant human predicament.    4.  Affection shown through holding and touching in respectful ways.    5.  Allowing life and love to be just as they are, with all their ecstasy and ache, without trying to take control. When deeply understood and applied, these five simple concepts—what Richo calls the five A's—form the basis of mature love. They help us to move away from judgment, fear, and blame to a position of openness, compassion, and realism about life and relationships. By giving and receiving these five A's, relationships become deeper and more meaningful, and they become a ground for personal transformation.

The Alter Ego Effect: The Power of Secret Identities to Transform Your Life


Todd Herman - 2019
    There’s also one person who can move you out of the way so you can perform at your peak. That person is already inside you. You just need to unlock them. This other part of you is your Alter Ego. After twenty-one years of working with elite athletes, performers and leaders, Todd Herman has discovered how you can use your alter ego to achieve the seemingly impossible. It all clicked for Todd when he met Bo Jackson. When Herman met Bo Jackson, the professional athlete told him, “Bo Jackson never played a down of football in his entire life.” Bo explained that when he was young, he’d get into trouble because chaos caused by his anger issues. Then, he saw Friday the 13th and became fascinated by the cold, calculating nature of Jason Vorhees. In that moment, he resolved to stop being Bo Jackson, and start being Jason the moment he stepped on the field. In this transformative guide, Herman teaches you how to create and control an Alter Ego like Bo—and the thousands of other athletes, business leaders, entrepreneurs, and entertainers who have used this simple tool to change their lives. Herman also shares his own story: he knew that inside was a confident, self-assured, intelligent person who could help others get better results in their lives. When he started using superman’s classic trick—putting on a pair of glasses—he learned to trigger the specific traits he needed to achieve his goals.The Alter Ego Effect is not about creating a false mask—it’s about finding the hero already inside you. It’s a proven way of overcoming the self-doubt, negativity, and insecurity that hold you back, and empowering you to ultimately become your best self.