Most of us do that. And most of us would like to keep things as they are: humans in the dark, dogs with the upper hand.But we dogs are about to let you in a little secret. Okay, a lot of secrets. We graduated first in our obedience class three times. This should tell you something. Puppies know that they're being cute. They're using you. We don't sound anything like those silly voices you use to imitate us. We hate those ridiculous names you give some of us. Moonbeam is not a dignified name for a mutt. You might want to check your herb garden for fertilizer. We are only wearing this stupid birthday hat so we can get some cake. No self-respecting dog cares about his birthday. We are not spoiled, certainly not in comparison to teenage girls. We are in charge of the house. We let you pretend that you are. We'd be lost without you. We love you.It's all in our new book, Things Your Dog Doesn't Want You To Know, as told to humans Hy Conrad and Jeff Johnson. Even Steve Martin (yes, THAT Steve Martin) raves about us Inside you'll find revelations such as the reason we at the sofa (leather tastes very similar to rawhide), and what we really think of the costumes you dress us up in.I'm not alone. Ten other courageous canines have stepped forward to tell you what your dog won't - every last dirty, hairy bit of it. If you have dogs, love dogs, or have ever been baffled by a dog, this book is a must-have.

    A painting of a corn dog. A clock made out of an old “mostly clean” cheese grater. All this and more await you in the pages of Regretsy, a veritable sideshow of handcrafts gone wrong. Based on the eponymous hit blog and arranged in categories such as Décor, Pet Humiliation, and Christmas, Regretsy showcases the best of the worst, ranging from the hilariously absurd to the purely horrifying. Each page of this jaw-dropping volume features the actual seller’s online listing with a light coat of snarky commentary to give it a good shellacking. So join us as we descend into handmade hell and gawk, gasp, and marvel at the disturbingly odd artifacts that Regretsy has collected for your viewing pleasure, proving that you can never have too much of a bad thing.

    In his spare time, Theron took photos of Maddie doing what she does best: standing on things. From bicycles to giant watermelons to horses to people, there really isn't anything that Maddie won't stand on with grace and patience. The poignant Instagram photos of this beautiful dog and her offbeat poses have captured the imagination of all those who long for a road trip with a good dog for company. Maddie on Things celebrates the strange talent of one special dog and will resonate with any dog lover who appreciates the quirky hearts (and extraordinary balance) of canines.

    Here are some familiar faces from the online series, joined by dozens of dogs never seen before—all whose engaging personalities shine through. Sprinkled throughout the photos are words of wisdom from the Buddha, Gandhi, and other meditative masters, inspiring messages that, with the photos, warm the heart and soothe the spirit.A gorgeous compendium for every dog lover, animal enthusiast, and everyone looking to add some peace and joy to their day, Zen Dogs reminds us of the power dogs have to enrich our lives—to make us happier, healthier, calmer, and more loving.

    Combining humor, wit, poignancy, and affection, these columns provide insight into the intriguing and wonderful world we live in. Whether it be writing about animals (from dogs to elephants to geese!), powerful and moving comments about his own and other families, trenchant comments on life s foibles and farces, or his interviews and interactions with people who are memorable and unusual in their own right, John Grogan makes us laugh-he makes us cry-he makes us think.Visit www.baddogshavemorefun.comA percentage of the profits from the sale of this book will go to THE GOOD DOG FOUNDATION, where dogs help humans heal.To learn more, visit www.thegooddogfoundation.org"

    She took their cookware, their furniture, their photos, their decorations. She left Rafael alone in an empty all-white apartment. The only thing she didn't take was their bull terrier, whom she'd named after her favorite shoe designer: Jimmy Choo.With only Jimmy for company, Rafael found inspiration in his blank walls and his best friend and started snapping photos of Jimmy Choo as he trotted and cavorted around the house in glee. Then, when Jimmy collapsed in happy exhaustion next to the white wall, on a whim Rafael grabbed a marker and drew a new world around his ginger-eared pup. Suddenly, Rafael felt his long-dormant inspiration—for drawing, for art, for life—returning.The result? Hundreds of charming and cheeky images chronicling the owner and dog's relationship and adventures, including poses in a Star Wars stormtrooper helmet, passed out with liquor bottles, and as the shark in Jaws. Mantesso's Instagram feed quickly garnered fans from all over the world and caught the attention of major media outlets like Today, The Huffington Post, USA Today, and the Daily Mail, as well as Jimmy's namesake, the luxury shoe brand Jimmy Choo Ltd.Now, Mantesso presents a definitive selection of new and classic images of Jimmy and includes the backstory of how the two became such great collaborators. As heartwarming as it is hilarious, A Dog Named Jimmy will delight animal lovers everywhere.

    Cats love catnip. Whether it's eating it, playing with it, or rolling around in it, catnip turns our domestic feline friends into hilarious balls of activity. Carefree and unconstrained, they are free to be silly, exceptionally playful, and downright gnarly. Professional pet photographer and self-confessed crazy cat man Andrew Marttila (the photographer behind Shop Cats of New York) captures a range of the cats' silly and expressive personalities as they react to their catnip trip. Delightful, elegant Fluffy transforms into a hell-bent renegade. Shy, reserved Mittens becomes a free-loving acrobat. In the blink of an eye, a cat's expression transforms from bored to inquisitive to playful to curious to bizarre . . . to utterly unhinged. A fun and delightful look at our favorite companions, this gift book is perfect for every cat lover.

    She had no idea how things worked in her new family, but like any good older sibling, Harlow explained how they celebrated holidays, took family vacations, and remembered their sister, Sage who had gone on to doggie heaven before Indiana was born. Over time, Indi started to get the hang of it all, and she found herself growing up. In Harlow & Indiana (and Reese), it’s Indi’s turn to be a big sister when baby Reese arrives. Reese is tinier than Harlow and Indiana could ever have imagined, and they have a lot to get used to with a new sibling in the house. Narrated by the sassy and rabble-rousing Indiana, Harlow & Indiana (and Reese) is as adorable and charming as Harlow & Sage, filled with more jokes, more adventures, and even more sibling love than before. Richly illustrated with entirely new images of the highly photogenic pups, Harlow & Indiana (and Reese) is a new story about the furry friends that have captured hearts across the globe.

    Soon, her signature looks and endearing personality would capture the hearts of not only her new owner, but nearly everyone she encountered. After photos and videos of Marnie started circulating online, Marnie began charming millions over the world. Whether you're a dog or human, Marnie proves it's never too late to start a new chapter of your life and live it to the fullest. Using a sophisticated creative process compromised of unlimited treats and lots of love, Marnie and her human companion have created their first book of never-before-seen photos--and a few classics, too. Praise for "Marnie the Dog: I'm a Book": "Wow, I'm a book haha lol" -- Marnie the Dog

    They had mapped the route, brought three GPSs for backup, refrigerators full of food, and volunteers for help. But traveling in three RVs with twenty-five dogs turned out to be a bigger ordeal than he anticipated. Rosenfelt recounts the adventure with humor and warmth and tells how he and his wife became passionate foster parents for rescue dogs, culminating in the creation of the Tara Foundation.

    So fasten your exit and check for the nearest seatbelt—your FAIL plane departs now.

    Shirtless guys and puppy dog eyes take over with this collection of Hot Guys and Baby Animals by Audrey Khuner and Carolyn Newman.Hot Guys and Baby Animals features photos of gorgeous guys and their fuzzy friends, along with tongue-in-cheek captions detailing the likes and dislikes of each guy and baby animal. Let the "ohs" and "ahs" begin as male models play with puppies, snuggle kittens, nuzzle lambs, and even coo at a few chicks (baby chickens, that is). Perhaps the Sundance Channel says it best in its review of the California calendar that started it all: "Hot guys + baby animals = genius."

    Mittens relentlessly hassles his human all day long, while only taking breaks to watch Judge Judy, hang with his best friend Stumpy, complain about the antics of Drunk Patty the neighbor, ask Grandma for money to buy useless items from QVC, and harass the "filthy beast" dog, Phil.Angie Bailey is an award-winning writer and blogger, humorist, and professional member of the Cat Writers' Association. Her primary blog, Catladyland, has won many awards, and her humor writing is featured nearly daily on Catster.com, one of the most popular cat sites on the Web. She loves to photograph her cats in silly poses and sleeps with one eye open. And yes, she has three cats."Each installment of Texts From Mittens is like a little gift to brighten your day!" —Kate Benjamin, Hauspanther founder and co-author of Catification with Jackson Galaxy"Texts From Mittens makes me wish my cat had thumbs! This is a hilarious book; Angie Bailey has done it again!" —Jeremy Greenberg, Author of Sorry I Barfed on Your Bed"We all knew that cats were hilarious, but Ms. Bailey's sardonic cat quips really take their mannerisms, attitude and occasional apathy to another level." —Susan Michals, Curator of Cat Art Show Los AngelesCome home! There's an emergency! What?? Are you OK? My dish is half empty! I'll be home soon. You wish starvation upon me! Stop being dramatic. Am weeak. Caan hasrdly tyyppe. Are you going to wear those black pants on your bed? Yes. I have a date. They're comfortable. Mittens, get off my pants!

    Over time, the objects became bigger: remote controls, shoes, empty pizza boxes. And then cat owners everywhere were sucked into the Internet phenomenon that is defined by a simple motto: stuff + cats = awesome. From Stuffonmycat.com (the amazingly popular website that redefines hilarious and that was named one of the coolest sites of the year by Yahoo! And GQ magazine) comes Stuff On My Cat: The Book. Culled from the thousands of outrageous photographs submitted by mischievous animal lovers, here are 200 of the most unbelievably entertaining images of cats with all manner of things on them: wigs, Easter eggs, dogs, cheeseburgers, cookware, gummi bears, action figures, tiaras, beer cans, pinecones, a statue of the Buddha, and much more. An introduction by the site's creator explains the Stuff on My Cat philosophy, and playful illustrations and graphics are sprinkled throughout. Just try to keep a straight face.

    Combining all-new material along with fan favorites and behind-the-scenes tidbits on the hardships and hilarity of running a popular blog, 'Cake Wrecks' is sure to please both new and old fans alike. Jen Yates has been a clown, a cash office accountant, a Jungle Cruise skipper, a small business owner, a children's book inventory expeditor, and a house painter. She loves all types of cake and the people who make them, especially if they share. She currently lives in Florida with her husband, John, and their two cats.