Here, featuring gloriously pseudo-scientific diagrams and the inimitable writing style that made footballcliches.com a smash hit, they are covered in all their glory.

    has received more than 50 million views on YouTube alone for his witty Internet videos ("Hastily Made Tourism Video," "Cleveland Browns: Factory of Sadness," and others). Now he delivers the same wicked sense of humor in a book.This hilarious rustbelt satire lampoons Cleveland's quirks, including our boundless obsession with crappy sports teams, the nonstop quest to reinvent our civic image, and a grab-bag collection of odd local celebrities.Polk tackles such timely topics as: Great Places to Take a Dump Downtown . . . Riding the RTA: A Fascinating Cultural Experience . . . A Cleveland Enemies Hall of Fame . . . A Comparison of Three Area Gentlemen's Clubs . . . A Fabulous Remake of Cleveland's Own Flag . . . and much more.Full color photos throughout.

    "By reading my book, you can become happier without ever having to leave the comfort and security of your own private hell," she writes. In How to Be Hap-Hap-Happy Like Me, Merrill Markoe has undertaken the arduous task of actually carrying out the best "how to be happy" suggestions from the wisest of all possible sources of advice, the "365 Days to a Happier Life" Desk Calendar. So abandon the pursuit of happiness, sit back, and "extend a social invitation to someone you've always been afraid to approach," and share Merrill's unforgettable dinner with Fabio; "take the time to improve your knowledge of another period of history," while dining with Merrill at the Medieval Times Dinner and Tournament Restaurant franchise ("where the year is 1093 A.D. and you are the guests of the royal castle"); "plan a party and invite the people you care about," in which you watch Merrill answer the door in her pajamas and pretend the party was yesterday; "enroll in a class or lecture that interests you," accompanying Merrill to a session of Dominatrix 101 at the Learning Annex. Where else can you discover the beauty secrets of someone who is not so genetically perfect that her advice is completely useless, or "How to Please a Man Every Time and Have Him Okay Maybe Not Beg for More but at Least Not Demand a Whole Lot Less"? Markoe is that rare soul who will unselfishly share with you these and many other secrets of how to live a not-totally-nightmarish life. And even if you don't learn anything, this book will make you laugh, which is more happiness than you can get from most desk calendars.

    Armed with the information from Cathryn's Wild Sexual Animal Kingdom research and her "Love is Important but Chocolate is Essential" Chocolate Fun Facts, her posse of Grrl Geniuses struggle with singlehood, married life, sexual preferences, widowhood, and friendship. Cathryn's journey veers from a "nails-on-chalkboard-scratchingly-awful" divorce and the botched kidnapping of her own dog, to pretending to be a lesbian, seeing her old lingerie sold on her old front lawn by her ex-husband's girlfriend, losing her job, and a tragic industrial accident-level bikini wax. And through everything, Cathryn searches for the answer to the most important relationship question of all: why are all the best men gay?If you've ever been tempted to have sex with another person, this is an essential read. If you've ever felt inadequate to a task or a failure at love or in any way anything less than a genius and you've sunk so low that even a new pair of cute shoes won't help, Cathryn Michon can show you the way to relationship happiness-all you have to do is learn from her very funny mistakes. However badly you think you've done anything, Cathryn has done it even worse, and reveals lessons learned in the wryly witty and devastatingly honest style that has made her the favorite of aspiring geniuses everywhere!

    Chock full of easy to understand instructions and full color pictures for the 24 recipes included, you are sure to succeed with this book, regardless of your skill level. With a few simple ingredients, and a little bit of time, you’ll be making bath bombs in an afternoon. You’re in good hands with this quick and easy guide to showing you not only the basics, but also more fun and challenging recipes like the Fizzy Pops, designed to look like tasty cake pop treats. Taking it a step further she has also included cupcake bath bombs with a sugar scrub topping. Who wouldn't love to make these? This book can be a project for yourself, a gift for a friend, or an enhancement to your knowledge in the world of bath and body crafts. Whatever the purpose, the reader will enjoy!

    Molly gives us his unforgettable encounters with The Beatles, Elton John, David Bowie, The Rolling Stones, Madonna, John Farnham, Bruce Springsteen, the Bee Gees, Rod Stewart, Russell Crowe, Oasis, Beyonce and Prince. As well as the tales that surround his other loves: the Australian cricket team, the St Kilda footy club and the Melbourne Storm."I have a lot of love for the great Ian 'Molly' Meldrum" - Shane WarneNo one has lived a life like Ian 'Molly' Meldrum. And no one can tell a story like Molly.

    Join award-winning podcaster Oliver Gee on this laugh-out-loud journey through the streets of Paris.He tells of how five years in France have taught him how to order cheese, make a Parisian person smile, and convince anyone you can fake French (even if, like Oliver, you speak the language like an Australian cow).A fresh voice on the Paris scene, he shares the soaring highs and crushing lows that come with following your dreams to the French capital.He also befriends the city's too-cool-for-school basketballers, chases runaway crocodiles, and goes on a mammoth honeymoon trip around France on his little red scooter.

    She was asked by many to put these short essays into book form, to create, as one reader said, something to "take to the beach, or bed, or on an airplane." Elizabeth and her friend, the book's designer Phyllis Florin, happily complied, and they hope that their offering will be as welcome as flowers in a mailbox.

    In Savage's funniest, most biting book yet, the nation's fiercest independent thinker invites you to take a riotous tour through The Political Zoo--an outrageous look at today's most prominent politicos and pundits as the reptiles, rats, and birds of prey they most resemble.Animal by animal and cage by cage, Savage brandishes his irreverent wit to keep these beasts in check. Serving as resident biologist and zookeeper, Dr. Savage asks that you watch your step when approaching the widemouth copperhead Ted Turner (also known as Mouthus desouthus), do not feed the ego of stuffed turkey Alec Baldwin (Notalentus anti-americanus), and please keep your children with you at all times around wolf boy Bill Clinton (Fondlem undgropeum)."The world of politics is filled with uncivilized, snarling, rapacious beasts that, like untrained mutts, raise their legs and urinate on everything we hold dear," says Savage. And this sensational book is your guide for navigating the jungle of today's animal-political kingdom.

    It's a picture of an ideal relationship for a new generation of married couples: alternately grotesque, sexy, silly, and sexually permissive, but above all, built on mutual respect and honesty: •I promise: to never comment on your bad breath, as long as you don't come near me with bad breath. •We're going to make a lot of parenting mistakes: Let's not make putting leashes on our children when we go to the mall one of them.•Your job: I know I'm the 'free spirited one', but you're not allowed to be doing something that makes you miserable. Sorry. We'll f**'in live in a box, it's fine.

    Yeah, right--there is no sense in both us dying"), discipline ("If you've got to get whupped, your father is the man. Mothers don't stop until you're bleeding to death"), money ("Before computers, checks were great...local ones took fourteen days to clear"), men and women ("If there were no women in the world, men would be naked, driving trucks, living in dirt"), underwear ("Women, do not buy your men bikini underpants"), love ("If you can get a car with no money down, you can get a boyfriend or girlfriend"), marriage ("There is no compromise, you either go to the basketball game or you go to a movie you hate"), divorce ("there are no Betty Ford clinics for strung-out lovers. You have to go cold turkey"), dieting ("I would be hanging out at McDonald's, tapping on the window: 'Don't throw out those fries!'"), parenting ("When they caught Jeffrey Dahmer, his mom was protective: 'He always had a healthy appetite...'"), technology, and much more.

    These botanical heirlooms, such as flowering almond, blackberry lily, and night-blooming cereus, usually can't be found in neighborhood garden centers; about the only way to obtain a passalong plant is to beg a cutting from the fortunate gardener who has one. In this lively and sometimes irreverent book (don't miss the chapter on yard art), Steve Bender and Felder Rushing describe 117 such plants, giving particulars on hardiness, size, uses in the garden, and horticultural requirements. They present this information in the informal, chatty, and sometimes humorous manner that your next-door neighbor might use when giving you a cutting of her treasured Confederate rose. And, of course, because they are discussing passalong plants, they note the best method of sharing each plant with other gardeners. Because you might not spy a banana shrub or sweet pea in your neighborhood, the authors list mail-order sources for the heirloom plants described. They also give tips on how to organize your own plant swap. Although the authors live in and write about the South, many of the plants they discuss will grow elsewhere. from the book Amid the clamor of press releases touting the newest, improved versions of this bulb or that perennial, what keeps people interested in old-fashioned plants? Nostalgia, for one thing. It's hard not to feel a special fondness for that Confederate rose, night-blooming cereus, or alstroemeria lovingly tended by your grandmother when you were a child. Such heirloom plants evoke memories of your first garden, of relatives and neighbors that have since passed on, of prized bushes you accidentally annihilated with your bicycle. Recall the time you first received a particular plant, and you'll recall the person who gave it to you.

    Kamath, Ajay Piramal, Amit Chandra, Ganesh Natrajan, Renuka Ramnath, P.P. Chhabria, Pradeep Bhargava, Deep Anand, Capt. Gopinath, Mallika Sarabhai, Shaheen Mistri, Sanjeev Kapoor, Jatin Das, and Prakash Padukone They say a daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart. In Legacy, noted journalist and author Sudha Menon brings forth a rare collection of personal and evocative letters from parents to their daughters. Through their fearless approach to life, love, and overcoming obstacles, these icons from the world of business, arts, films, food, and sports share with us their experience and wisdom as they pass them on to their daughters. Deeply moving and thought provoking, Legacy is a remarkable collection of life lessons that will delight and inspire at the same time

    Also included are stories of ghost animals, haunted houses, vengeful spirits, guardian angels and much, much more. Many of the stories you are about to read will warm your heart, while others will leave you in a cold sweat. Sit back and relax. Make sure you are locked in safe and sound as you settle in for a scary read. Oh, and if you hear a strange noise in the hallway, don't worry, it's probably just the house settling. Well, maybe not.

    She is certain she and Jason have a strong and loving relationship that can weather any storm. Hooked by the beauty of Torringham with its quaint harbour and stunning coastline, they purchase Flotsam Guesthouse which needs more than a lick of paint to keep it afloat. Soon, Katie finds that renovating and running a guesthouse is taking its toll, especially when dealing with challenging guests and madcap neighbours, Shona and Kim. Katie comes to learn that trouble is afoot whenever Shona begs a favour. However, when her adored daughter moves back to their old hometown, she wonders if they’ve made a huge mistake, especially when cracks begin to show in her marriage. Her seaside idyll is crumbling along with her relationship. Should she let Flotsam Guesthouse founder while she salvages her marriage? Katie needs to decide where her priorities lie. The only issue is, she doesn’t know.