His first mission: save a gazillion lives. When young Kevin has a chance encounter with a dying alien, he discovers not only that humans aren't alone in the universe, but that this encounter propels him into the middle of an intergalactic war. Now at the frontlines of a massive, far far away war, he’s sent to the last remaining ship of the losing side. The crew of the ship? All dead. His mission is simple: he must save the good guys from certain doom. From College reject to War Master, Kevin learns he must adapt quickly or billions will die.

    

     So waste no more time, scroll up this page and order the the ebook right now.

    Whether this is because they haven't yet mastered the 21st century phone or because they live to embarrass you throughout all forms of communication, Text Fails from Mum, is a hilarious collection of our all time favourite texts from Mum.Please stop changing the google logo so much, I like the original one.Mum I don't change the logo. Google changes it.On my computer, you don't run the Google?If I did I wouldn't be driving a 2004 Ford.Andy, I can't find my phone. Can you call it so I can try and track it down?I don't have time to be quippy, mum. It's in your hand.What? No it's not. I've got a bag of groceries in my hand. Are you saying it's in the grocery bag? How do you know these things!?WHAT ARE YOU TEXTING ME WITH!?Never mind! I found it! Thanks!This humour gift book is the laugh out loud answer to the annual conundrum what should I get Mum for Christmas, Mother's Day and her Birthday? Text Fails From Mum is the perfect stocking filler, and a gift all the family can relate to and enjoy.

    But, as his ship decimates planet after planet, he finds his sympathies swinging toward their defeated enemies. Sergeant Anki Paro, a Luthian Marine, has been anxiously awaiting the call to deploy. As the last line of defense against the crushing Greshian forces, she hopes the time has finally come for her world to stand against tyranny. However, as her society prepares for imminent destruction, questions of misplaced loyalties lead Anki to wonder if the world she is trying to save has any real intentions of surviving. As Brendle's and Anki's worlds collide, they find themselves in an unlikely alliance to try to stop the full might of the Greshian Empire before there's nothing left to fight for. A stolen ship, a mission on the line, enemies at every turn... After four months in hiding, Brendle Quin can't delay his mission any longer. His ship, the Replicade, is held together with failing patches, and he needs to make repairs in a port. Unfortunately, the nearest world with proper facilities is situated deep in Greshian-owned enemy territory. The Greshian colony of Farax is a safe hold for piracy in the region, and none is more vile than Crase Tuin, a man known for trafficking people and weapons across the Alorian Galaxy. He has a reputation as the only pirate never to lose a ship--with the exception of the Replicade. When Crase finds the Replicade, he vows to claim the lives of those who stole her. But Brendle won't go down without a fight. Nothing has stopped the Greshian Empire's expanse, but all hope isn't lost... The illusion of peace shrouds a hidden darkness. Just as the crew of the Replicade are getting settled on a seemingly tranquil world, they encounter a young girl with special abilities--and she's being hunted by a secret, powerful organization that will stop at nothing to have her. When Anki and Brendle intervene to help the girl, they are caught in the organization's crosshairs. The crew must make a decision: give into the looming threat of the organization, or die fighting to protect her. Meanwhile, Lieutenant Commander Ilium Gyl has taken command of a Greshian scout ship. A breach in protocol raises questions of his loyalty to the Greshian Empire, leading to a power struggle as a rebellion sparks in a distant sector of the Alorian Galaxy. His ambitions may cripple the Greshian Fleet, or he might just be the empire's savior. The Alorian Wars is a space opera series, filled with political intrigue and shrouded in mystery, is sure to please fans of "The Expanse", "Dark Matter", "Firefly", and "Killjoys". Join the war today!

    

    The indigenous creatures of Faust have never accepted any invaders--but today, new arrivals haunt their skies. The Black Ship is a predatory vessel. Built for stealth, she glides undetected among the stars, seeking colonies along the Faustian Chain that are ripe for raiding--or outright conquest. These three forces: the colonists, the alien life forms, and the cyborg crew of the Black Ship, are on a collision course in this thrilling military SF adventure. THE BLACK SHIP is a Novella of classic military science fiction by B. V. Larson. The stories in this series can be read in any order.

    This book was brought to you by the one and only - THE CLOWN FACTORY.

    Somebody has to support all the new galactic tech and Jack Buckston, President, CEO and sole employee of Xenotech Support Corporation, does his best to keep his clients happy, find true love and prevent interstellar war. Galactic technology has cured cancer, solved the energy crisis, and eliminated global warming--but what do the aliens want from us? They can't get enough Congressional subcommittee broadcasts--they consider them reality comedies! Xenotech Rising is a light-hearted romp and the first book in the Xenotech Support / Galactic Free Trade Association series.

    The 100 Best Yo Mama Jokes.

    Enjoy these hilarious stories about stupid criminals, their hilarious attempts at crime, and bizarre mistakes they made that prevented them from getting away with their crimes.

    Over a thousand pages of heart-pounding sci-fi action. One great price. With over a hundred thousand books sold and borrowed, the Argonauts series has been one of the best-selling sagas published on Amazon over the past year. For fans of military science fiction and space opera alike, this bundle contains the first three novels: Bug Hunt, You Are Prey, and Alien Empress. In this compelling set, Rade Galaal and his elite team of mercenaries enter the fray to deal with an alien infestation, infiltrate a stone-age civilization, and defend an extraterrestrial homeworld. Download this unique bundle today, because there's never been a better time to hunt some bugs.

    Rapid expansion into habitable worlds brings immense prosperity and a new age of exploration unlike any humanity has seen. WAR Conflicts over control of the colonial worlds spawn a massive, generation-long war among humans. Under a shaky armistice, humanity has just begun to crawl out of the shadows of destruction, but suspicion and bitter hostility run deep. INVASION On a rocky, desolate planet, a small band of gold prospectors find themselves making a discovery they never expected—valuable and powerful relics of the galaxy's deep past. The prospectors also discover a hostile alien species, ruthless beings who do not tolerate humans and wipe them out on sight. Humanity's first contact with intelligent aliens becomes a war for survival. The invasion has begun...but the beginning of the invasion is also the beginning of the resistance. "Resistance is a terrific space opera adventure. It combines mystery, heart-pounding action, and a good dose of humor. It's Aliens meets Tremors. I can't wait to read the sequel." -Daniel Arenson, USA Today bestselling author of the Earthrise series

    Unfortunately, that was before two dudes wielding high-tech gadgets made off with both his kegs and his brother. Now Clyde has to hunt down his sibling with only his most trusted lackey along to help. Will he manage to recover both his beer and Dougie? Will they survive the night as they unveil the mysterious secret of the kidnappers? Will the Earth be destroyed thanks to their bumbling incompetence? Probably that last one, but you’ll have to read it to find out.

    Along the way, readers join the author in discovering: • The scary side of fishing; • Why it’s wrong when board games become blood sports; • The unexpected connection between cooking classes and true romance; • How the author's cat convinced him to take up yoga (and why that was a terrible idea); • Golfing for the ball challenged; • The thrill of jumping out of an airplane without risking your life; • The eternal appeal of Elly May Clampett; and, • How to do nothing without feeling guilty about it.