Red Flags: How to know he's playing games with you. How to spot a guy who's never going to commit. How to force him to show his cards. (The Truth about ... of commitment and sudden loss of interest)


Brian Keephimattracted - 2015
     It’s time to use the secrets of the men who “play” games with women and find out - What the Red Flags are that will give him away sooner - How to find out if he sees a future with you - Why men play games with you (what are their motives?) - Two reasons why men won’t commit - The types of men who play games with you - Strategies to get him - How to force him to show his cards, how to find out the truth sooner than later - When and how to let him go, if needed. - How to test him and see if he’s willing to go the extra mile - My quick strategy to make a man commit. There are different types of men who play games with women. Not all of them are the obvious ‘player’, that’s the only type of player you can see from a mile away. No no, there are other types of men who use under the radar manipulation techniques to keep women interested, even though they see no future with her. It’s hard to date a man or be in a relationship (let alone a marriage) with a man who’s not really honest about his real feelings for you. In this book, you’ll learn what types of men play games, why they play those games, red flags to watch out for, and how to filter the true bad boys out of your life. You’ll learn how you can protect your heart from men who don’t even deserve your attention, let alone your love and devotion. I want you to understand what types of men play these games because this will help you identify them a lot sooner. Then I’ll teach you some strategies to quickly test him and turn things around. If he doesn’t respond well to those tests, at least you can be sure that he’s playing with you and it’s time to move on. I’ve been coaching women for many years now, and it frustrates me when I see how many men simply don’t respect women. They play with their hearts, their feelings, and their future. Since I’m a man myself, I know why men do what they do. I’m here to help great women like you who keep walking into the traps of the same disrespectful men. Men who play games do it with every woman they meet. If you’ve ever encountered one, it wasn’t personal; it’s just the way they are built. They don’t know any better. In my series of books, I try to uncover the truth about the man behind the game, so you’ll know what’s really going on in his mind. In this book, we’ll focus on the type of men who play games with women. These men know how to touch a woman’s hot buttons, how to make her happy, how to attract her into his trap. The problem is, because they’re not genuine, your gut feeling will start to notice the discrepancies, the little white lies, when his words don’t align with his actions. That’s when the emotional rollercoaster ride starts. Men who play games, and as you’ll see it’s not only the player type who does this, know how to hang a carrot on a stick in front of a woman. You might think this only happens to not-so-intelligent women. It doesn’t. Some of my clients have very high positions in international companies, household names, lawyers, surgeons, and so on. Yet they too fall for his games and step into his traps.

Marry Him: The Case for Settling for Mr. Good Enough


Lori Gottlieb - 2010
    So what if you haven't found The One just yet. Surely he'll come along, right? But what if he doesn't? Or even worse, what if he already has, but you just didn't realize it? Suddenly finding herself forty and single, Lori Gottlieb said the unthinkable in her March 2008 article in "The Atlantic" Maybe she and single women everywhere, needed to stop chasing the elusive Prince Charming and instead go for Mr. Good Enough. Looking at her friends' happy marriages to good enough guys who happen to be excellent husbands and fathers, Gottlieb declared it time to reevaluate what we really need in a partner. Her ideas created a firestorm of controversy from outlets like the "Today" show to "The Washington Post," which wrote, "Given the perennial shortage of perfect men, Gottlieb's probably got a point," to "Newsweek" and NPR, which declared, "Lori Gottlieb didn't want to take her mother's advice to be less picky, but now that she's turned forty, she wonders if her mother is right." Women all over the world were talking. But while many people agreed that they should have more realistic expectations, what did that actually mean out in the real world, where Gottlieb and women like her were inexorably drawn to their "type"? That's where "Marry Him" comes in. By looking at everything from culture to biology, in "Marry Him" Gottlieb frankly explores the dilemma that so many women today seem to face--how to reconcile the strong desire for a husband and family with a list of must-haves so long and complicated that many great guys get rejected out of the gate. Here Gottlieb shares her own journey in the quest for romantic fulfillment, and in the process gets wise guidance and surprising insights from marital researchers, matchmakers, dating coaches, behavioral economists, neuropsychologists, sociologists, couples therapists, divorce lawyers, and clergy--as well as single and married men and women, ranging in age from their twenties to their sixties. "Marry Him" is an eye-opening, often funny, sometimes painful, and always truthful in-depth examination of the modern dating landscape, and ultimately, a provocative wake-up call about getting real about Mr. Right.

When Your Lover Is a Liar: Healing the Wounds of Deception and Betrayal


Susan Forward - 1999
    Based on her many years of practice and her extensive knowledge, Forward profiles the wide variety of liars, tells how to deal with the lies—from the benign to the lethal—that these men spin, and gives you practical strategies to stop them before they ruin your relationship and your life.In straightforward language, Forward examines the lies women tell themselves and paints a vivid picture of the effects lying has on women'including loss of self-respect, withdrawal, self-blame, rage, and the desire for revenge—and how to deal with them effectively. Through practical, proven step-by-step methods for healing the wounds caused by his deception and betrayal, Forward provides all the communication and behavioral techniques you need to deal with a lover's lies. Forward tells you exactly what to say, when and how to respond to his reactions, and how to present your requirements for staying in the relationship. With understanding and compassion, she helps you decide whether your relationship can be saved and shows you how to move beyond doubt and regret if it can't.But whether you stay or go, you can learn to love and trust again. Susan Forward shows you the path to rebuilding your confidence and self-respect as well as experiencing the rebirth of trust, both in yourself and in your partner.

It's Not You: 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single


Sara Eckel - 2014
    Even the most self-possessed singleton may come to doubt herself. ?"You're too picky. Just find a good-enough guy and you'll be fine." "You're too desperate. If men think you need them, they'll run scared." "You're too independent. Smart, ambitious women always have a harder time finding mates." "You have low self-esteem. You can't love someone else until you've learned to love yourself.""You're too needy. You can't be happy in a relationship until you've learned to be happy on your own." It's Not You is structured around the many messages that singles, especially single women, get about who they are and who they're supposed to be. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with single women, Eckel creates a strong argument for why you should love yourself as you are--no change necessary. By debunking the myths that have kept single women doubting themselves, Eckel encourages singles to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them, as they begin to understand and accept there's no one reason they're single--they just are.

Maybe He's Just an Asshole: Sharpen Your Bullshit Detector, Rock Your Expectations, and Become Your Strongest Self!


Halle Kaye - 2012
    According to Kaye and Stone, the vicious cycle ends only when a woman begins to approach dating not from a position of weakness and desperation, but from a position of strength and leverage. That fundamental shift takes place organically as a woman gets in touch with her strongest self and begins to channel her most positive, confident and empowered energy not just in her love life, but in every part of her life. Maybe He's Just an Asshole is the insightful, inspirational, and HILARIOUS manual for any woman who wants to sharpen her bullshit detector, rock her expectations, and become her strongest self. In a world where most of the dating rules seem to have been written from the perspective of the penis, it's time for women to take back the power! The reward: a better life and a better man!

Get Inside Her: Dirty Dating Tips & Secrets from a Woman on How to Attract, Seduce and Get Any Female You Want


Marni Kinrys - 2013
    You see, these emails were not the typical online dating messages. They weren't asking me out on dates, or vying for desire or attention. They were sent from great guys, who no matter what they tried, always seemed to find that beautiful women ended up dating jerks and never calling them back.Now, you might be wondering what all these guys are doing emailing me their questions, but as a professional Wing Girl, it's my duty to be the girl who gives it to guys straight of the dating community. I'm always brutally honest and have been told I have a gift for seeing things from both sides of the dating lines, but it took me a few glasses of wine and some seriously deep thinking to try to piece the puzzle together.What was going on?I knew all my gorgeous girlfriends were looking for these types of men. Men who were exciting, fun, good, honest and who had their life together...So as they were they emailing me, detailing their failed attempts, I tried to find the one common factor that was holding these great guys back. I spoke with them at length about their dating history, trying to figure out if they were doing something wrong, and then it struck me.It wasn't them; it was "The Game" they had been told to play.They had the best intentions, but they were going about attracting and dating beautiful women in all the wrong ways. They were dating from the male perspective and in a way that seemed right to other guys; but this wasn't communicated clearly to women!As I started to reply to each email, instead of telling them what I thought they wanted to hear or what I thought male Pick Up Artists might tell them, I started to lay it all out on the line. Later on, when I asked my girlfriends for their opinion, they couldn't believe what I had written.I was revealing all secrets women would never tell men. I was putting it out there in a way that would give guys what my girlfriends called the upper hand, but I defended my actions. These were genuinely great guys! I was tired of hearing how women could never find what they were looking for. Now, when I was gave the men a road map to go out and find them, they freaked out!That's when I knew I had something worth sharing. Something that would turn the dating world on its head; finally, I thought, "It's time to shake things up!"If you have ever wondered why you aren't on the calendars of beautiful women, why they never seem to call back, or always end up with the jerks of the world, then you have to hear what I have to say.You need to accept that it's not your fault and face the facts. Men and women are different. We act, think, and date differently. If you want to find success, you have to see things from a different perspective. You have to gain the world's first (and best) awarded female Pick Up Artists perspective!Now when I go out, meet with clients, call, or email these great guys back, I get something in return. I get to see them finally date the women they have always wanted and deserved. They tell me how easy and simple it has become, and how they cannot believe they didn't think of it first.

What Makes Love Last?: How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal


John M. Gottman - 2012
    A world-renowned relationship expert shares his research about love and what it takes to develop a trustful, intimate, and emotionally fulfilling bond.In this insightful book, celebrated research psychologist and couples counselor John Gottman plumbs the mysteries of love and shares the results of his famous “Love Lab”: Where does love come from? Why does some love last, and why does some fade? And how can we keep it alive? Based on laboratory findings, this book shows readers how to identify signs, behaviors, and attitudes that indicate a fraying relationship and provides strategies for repairing what may seem lost or broken.

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic


Esther Perel - 2006
    She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.In her 20 years of clinical experience, Perel has treated hundreds of couples whose home lives are empty of passion. They describe relationships that are open and loving, yet sexually dull. What is going on?In this explosively original book, Perel explains that our cultural penchant for equality, togetherness, and absolute candor is antithetical to erotic desire for both men and women. Sexual excitement doesn't always play by the rules of good citizenship. It is politically incorrect. It thrives on power plays, unfair advantages, and the space between self and other. More exciting, playful, even poetic sex is possible, but first we must kick egalitarian ideals and emotional housekeeping out of our bedrooms.While Mating in Captivity shows why the domestic realm can feel like a cage, Perel's take on bedroom dynamics promises to liberate, enchant, and provoke. Flinging the doors open on erotic life and domesticity, she invites us to put the "X" back in sex.©2006 Esther Perel (P)2006 HarperCollins Publishers

The Game of Desire: 5 Surprising Secrets to Dating with Dominance - and Getting What You Want


Shannon Boodram - 2019
    Apps like Tinder and Bumble are supposed to foster connection, but instead serve as a reminder of how painfully single we are. Certified sexologist and intimacy coach Shan Boodram—the most sought-after sex educator on the internet—is about to change all that. In this essential how-to guide, she addresses the realities of life today—when the rules of love and attraction are fluid—and teaches a group of young women how to become master daters in just sixty days.It starts with you. Shan makes clear that love and self-discovery go hand in hand—your dating life is just as much about you as it is about other people. She challenges you to look inside yourself for what you want out of a partner, a relationship and, most important, yourself. Once you figure out what you want from dating, she shows you exactly how to get it. The Game of Desire empowers you to take the lead, learn your strengths, and identify and correct your weaknesses, all the while getting inspired watching a group of women learn how to succeed in today’s dating pool.While many books tell women why they can’t get a date, Shan teaches you the skills and techniques necessary to take charge in today’s competitive and often confusing dating scene, providing the tools essential to attract—and retain—the partner(s) you want. From learning love languages to debunking dating myths, she helps women build knowledge and confidence. Featuring conversational case studies, comprehensive facts about the psychology of sex and romance, and expert insight into sex culture, and written with her trademark humor and charm, The Game of Desire is a must for all of Shan’s fans and for every woman struggling to feel loved and desired.

How to Date Men When You Hate Men


Blythe Roberson - 2019
    You'll have a blast reading this and then date...or not date anyone because you are living your best single life with new best friend Roberson by your side." - Phoebe Robinson, New York Times bestselling author of You Can't Touch My Hair

How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love


Logan Ury - 2021
    Great relationships don’t just appear in our lives—they’re the culmination of a series of decisions, including whom to date, how to end it with the wrong person, and when to commit to the right one. But our brains often get in the way. We make poor decisions, which thwart us on our quest to find lasting love. Drawing from years of research, behavioral scientist turned dating coach Logan Ury reveals the hidden forces that cause those mistakes. But awareness on its own doesn’t lead to results. You have to actually change your behavior. Ury shows you how. This “simple-to-use guide” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) focuses on a different decision in each chapter, incorporating insights from behavioral science, original research, and real-life stories. You’ll learn: -What’s holding you back in dating (and how to break the pattern) -What really matters in a long-term partner (and what really doesn’t) -How to overcome the perils of online dating (and make the apps work for you) -How to meet more people in real life (while doing activities you love) -How to make dates fun again (so they stop feeling like job interviews) -Why “the spark” is a myth (but you’ll find love anyway) This “data-driven” (Time), step-by-step guide to relationships, complete with hands-on exercises, is designed to transform your life. How to Not Die Alone will help you find, build, and keep the relationship of your dreams.

The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships


Harriet Lerner - 1989
    Taking a careful look at those relationships where intimacy is most challenged--by distance, intensity, or pain--she teaches us about the specific changes we can make to achieve a more solid sense of self and a more intimate connectedness with others. Combining clear advice with vivid case examples, Dr. Lerner offers us the most solid, helpful book on intimate relationships that both women and men may ever encounter.

Anatomy of Love: A Natural History of Mating, Marriage, and Why We Stray


Helen Fisher - 1992
    Since then, Fisher has conducted pioneering brain research on lust, romantic love, and attachment; gathered data on more than 80,000 people to explain why you love who you love; and collected information on more than 30,000 men and women on sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, and other current trends in courtship and marriage. And she presents a new, scientifically based and optimistic perspective on relationships in our digital age—what she calls “slow love.”This is a cutting-edge tour de force that traces human family life from its origins in Africa over 20 million years ago to the Internet dating sites and bedrooms of today. And it’s got it all: the copulatory gaze and other natural courting ploys; the who, when, where, and why of adultery; love addictions; her discovery of four broad chemically based personality styles and what each seeks in romance; the newest data on worldwide (biologically based) patterns of divorce; how and why men and women think differently; the real story of women, men, and power; the rise—and fall—of the sexual double standard; and what brain science tells us about how to make and keep a happy partnership.

The Social Animal: The Hidden Sources of Love, Character, and Achievement


David Brooks - 2011
    Now, with the intellectual curiosity and emotional wisdom that make his columns among the most read in the nation, Brooks turns to the building blocks of human flourishing in a multilayered, profoundly illuminating work grounded in everyday life.This is the story of how success happens. It is told through the lives of one composite American couple, Harold and Erica—how they grow, push forward, are pulled back, fail, and succeed. Distilling a vast array of information into these two vividly realized characters, Brooks illustrates a fundamental new understanding of human nature. A scientific revolution has occurred—we have learned more about the human brain in the last thirty years than we had in the previous three thousand. The unconscious mind, it turns out, is most of the mind—not a dark, vestigial place but a creative and enchanted one, where most of the brain’s work gets done. This is the realm of emotions, intuitions, biases, longings, genetic predispositions, personality traits, and social norms: the realm where character is formed and where our most important life decisions are made. The natural habitat of The Social Animal. Drawing on a wealth of current research from numerous disciplines, Brooks takes Harold and Erica from infancy to school; from the “odyssey years” that have come to define young adulthood to the high walls of poverty; from the nature of attachment, love, and commitment, to the nature of effective leadership. He reveals the deeply social aspect of our very minds and exposes the bias in modern culture that overemphasizes rationalism, individualism, and IQ. Along the way, he demolishes conventional definitions of success while looking toward a culture based on trust and humility.The Social Animal is a moving and nuanced intellectual adventure, a story of achievement and a defense of progress. Impossible to put down, it is an essential book for our time, one that will have broad social impact and will change the way we see ourselves and the world.

Coping With Difficult People: The Proven-Effective Battle Plan That Has Helped Millions Deal with the Troublemakers in Their Lives at Home and at Work


Robert M. Bramson - 1981
    Robert Bramson's proven-effective techniques are guaranteed to help you right the balance and take charge of your life. Learn how to:Stand up to anyone -- without fighting.Blunt a sniper's attack.Get a clam to talk.Cut off a Sherman tank at the pass.Manage bulldozers.Get stallers off the dime.Move a complainer into a problem-solving mode.Learn the six basic steps that allow you to cope with just about anyone. Reclaim the power the rightfully belongs to you in any relationship!