During kindergarten recess, one accidentally hitches a ride out of town on a boxcar. One winds up trapped in the breadbox outside the deli. One offers to escort a Salvation Army man to his destination - and accidentally bumps him from his horse-drawn wagon.

    Burke for fourth grade. How will he survive the strictest teacher in school? From Bill Harley's award-winning middle grade series."A real-life world in which a likable kid must face the everyday terrors of childhood: enormous bullies, looming teachers and thick gym coaches with huge pointing fingers.... Readers will be waiting to see how Charlie faces his next challenge in a series that marks a lovely change of pace from the sarcasm of Wimpy Kid." ―Kirkus ReviewsShortly before school starts, Charlie Bumpers learns that he will be in Mrs. Burke's class. It doesn't matter that she's been named Teacher of the Year. He's still afraid of her.Last year when he was horsing around in the hall, he accidentally hit her in the head with his sneaker (don't ask). The exasperated teacher declared that if anything like that ever happened again, Charlie would be banned from recess forever. How will he survive a year under a teacher who is just waiting for him to make another stupid mistake? Black and white illustrations throughout. Available in eBook.This laugh-out-loud series from Grammy Award-winning author Bill Harley is perfect for reluctant and transitional readers. Humor and heart combine with relatable problems and themes of family, friends, and school.Awards: Parents' Choice Recommended Award ―Parents' Choice FoundationKansas State Reading Circle Recommended Reading List (Intermediate) ―Kansas National Education AssociationBeverly Cleary Children's Choice Award ―Oregon Association of School LibrariesVirginia Readers' Choice (Master List) ―Virginia State Reading AssociationAlso available from Bill Harley: Charlie Bumpers vs. His Big Blabby MouthCharlie Bumpers vs. the End of the YearCharlie Bumpers vs. the Perfect Little TurkeyCharlie Bumpers vs. the Puny PiratesCharlie Bumpers vs. the Really Nice GnomeCharlie Bumpers vs. the Squeaking Skull

    He’s learning his way around using TOAST, which stands for the Theory of All Small Things. It’s a technique he invented to solve life’s little mysteries such as: where to sit on the on the first day of school, or which Chinese restaurant has the best eggrolls.But when he teaches it to his new friend Margaret, they uncover a mystery that isn’t little. In fact, it’s HUGE, and it involves the National Gallery, the FBI, and a notorious crime syndicate known as EEL.Can Florian decipher the clues and finish his homework in time to help the FBI solve the case?

    And ended with . . . well, if we told you that, it wouldn’t be a mystery! But in between The Scream and The Very Surprising Ending, three friends find themselves on a scavenger hunt set up for a girl they never met, in search of a legendary ring reputed to grant wishes. Are these sleuths in school uniforms modern-day equivalents of Nancy, Harriet, or Scooby? Not really, they’re just three nice girls who decide to help out a weird lady, and end up hiding under tables, tackling word puzzles and geometry equations, and searching rather moldy storage rooms for “the stuff that dreams are made of” (that’s from an old detective movie). Oh, and there’s A Boy, who complicates things. As boys often do.Intrigued? The Red Blazer Girls offers a fun, twisty adventure for those who love mystery, math (c’mon, admit it!), and a modest measure of mayhem.Michael Beil, a New York City high school English teacher, makes his literary debut with this fun and brainy mystery.

    Van Deusen. And not when you grow up. Right here, right now. Shine on! might be the catchphrase of twelve-year-old Piper's hero--astronaut, astronomer, and television host Nellie Dumont Frisse--but Piper knows the truth: some people are born to shine, and she's just not one of them. That fact has never been clearer than now, since her dad's new job has landed them both at Chumley Prep, a posh private school where everyone seems to be the best at something and where Piper definitely doesn't fit in.

    So when she joins the pet club and gets roped into putting on a talent show to raise money for the local animal shelter, Oliver has no choice but to help out. What he doesn't bargain for is that Freckles takes in a foster kitten! Turns out, while Oliver values his independence, he's not so eager to give up being center stage.

    That is, until she meets Austine—and discovers that Austine has the same secret! Soon the girls are best friends who do everything together—attending dance class, horseback riding, and dodging pesky Otis Spofford. But then Ellen does something terrible, and now Austine isn't speaking to her. Will Ellen be able to prove how sorry she truly is?

    Best of all is Jeffrey Tifton, son of Arundel’s owner, the perfect companion for their adventures. Icy-hearted Mrs. Tifton is less pleased with the Penderwicks than Jeffrey, and warns the new friends to stay out of trouble. Is that any fun? For sure the summer will be unforgettable.

    She disappeared after a school field trip to Black Vine Swamp. And, to be honest, the kids in her class are relieved. But when the principal tries to tell the students that Mrs. Starch has been called away on a "family emergency," Nick and Marta just don't buy it. No, they figure the class delinquent, Smoke, has something to do with her disappearance. And he does! But not in the way they think. There's a lot more going on in Black Vine Swamp than any one player in this twisted tale can see. And Nick and Marta will have to reckon with an eccentric eco-avenger, a stuffed rat named Chelsea, a wannabe Texas oilman, a singing substitute teacher, and a ticked-off Florida panther before they really begin to see the big picture. That's life in the swamp, kids.From the Hardcover edition.

    The perfect holiday gift for fans of the world’s favorite feline!MAKE WAY FOR GARFIELD!The tubby tabby is back, and he's livin' larger than ever! So whether he's enveloping Pooky in his Herculean hug, arguing with the talking scale, or munching on his masterpiece, the Leaning Tower of Pizza, Garfield's motto is always the same: Bigger is better!

    This hilarious 233 page full-color book contains over 400 of cartoonist, Chad Carpenter's latest comic creations. Consisting of anything animal, vegetable or mineral, but with a decidedly outdoorsy slant, this award-winning comic strip takes an offbeat view of the woodsy side of life. Find out for yourself why TUNDRA is one of the fastest-growing comic strips on the planet!

    The 100 Best Yo Mama Jokes.

    She will do anything to protect her family, even if that means giving up what she wants the most, a life with Santano“Tan” Morales. Tan knows that something is going on between Kia and his father but is not sure what. Tan has a lot on his plate with trying to keep his ex-wife’s advances at bay and finding out the secrets his wife and father are keeping from him. Will Kia trust Tan enough to confide in him? Sable Mills thought she had escaped her troubled past life in Nashville. Her controlling father was dead, and so was her cheating husband, thanks to being rescued by Kole Morales. Unfortunately, her past finds her and threatens to take away her newfound freedom. Can Kole save the woman he is falling for? Or will his secrets come back to not only haunt him but Sable as well? The D-City Squad comes together for one final ride, to battle new and old enemies. Viper and the crew will have to deal with more lies and drama. But will all of them make it out with their lives?

    Elaine Ambrose boldly writes her latest kiss-my-attitude book as a sassy sequel to Midlife Cabernet. Ambrose shares her festive life experiences and career-crushing anecdotes as she explains how to remain relevant after age 50, why grown children make great travel companions, and how to balance midlife without falling over. Ambrose notes that her feminine mystique sprung a leak after years of competing as a funny female in a serious male job market. Now the hard work is done, and she invites midlife women to join her for Happy Hour.

    Enjoy these hilarious stories about stupid criminals, their hilarious attempts at crime, and bizarre mistakes they made that prevented them from getting away with their crimes.