In this "terminally irreverent" ( "Richmond News-Leader" ) novel, he finds himself taking on everyone from his editor and his girlfriend to the fundamentalists and vegetarians covered on his beat - and along the way, learns some surprising (and hilarious) lessons about life, love, and the press. • Welter's "I Want to Buy a Vowel," also a Berkley Signature Edition, was named one of "Booklist's" Best Books of 1996. • Great reviews in the Berkley Signature Edition tradition. • The author has been compared to everyone from John Irving to Jonathan Swift, Frank Capra to Carl Hiaasen, John Kennedy Toole to Dave Barry.

    But while the selected poems in this volume may focus upon loss and grief, they also reflect solace, respite, and joy.  A goodbye is an opportunity for kindness, for forgiveness, for intimacy, and ultimately for love and a deepening acceptance of life as it is rather than what it was. Goodbyes can be poignant, sorrowful, sometimes a relief, and—now and then—even an occasion for joy.  They are always transitions that, when embraced, can be the door to a new life both for ourselves and for others. In this inspiring and consoling volume, Housden encourages readers to embrace poetry as a way of enabling us to better see and appreciate the beauty of the world around and within us.

    It premiered 37 years ago, in 1973, and, after 31 series it finally came to an end last year – even though all its original protagonists – Compo, Foggy, even Nora Batty – are now dead. Remarkably, for a series of such longevity and international appeal, it is all about elderly people, has little action or plot, and is set and filmed in and around the small Yorkshire town of Holmfirth. Now, Andrew Vine, the deputy editor of Yorkshire’s daily newspaper, has written the definitive history of this television phenomenon. It covers the show’s inauspicious beginnings, with low ratings, its endless reinvention as participants like Bill Owen, Michael Bates, Brian Wilde and Kathy Staff retired or died, the appearance of a string of guest stars from John Cleese and Norman Wisdom to Thora Hird and Russ Abbott (both of whom soon found themselves fixtures in the cast), and the ingenious plot contrivances as the protagonists became too old and frail to attempt any of the slapstick stunts with runaway prams – indeed any outdoor action. Holmfirth is now a year-round tourist attraction, and endless repeats and new DVD box sets will ensure a readership for this book for years to come.

    Now, with over 10,000 entries, this edition features the latest in expletives, sexual obscenities and lavatorial euphemisms.

    Karl Kruszelnicki has heard a galaxy full of questions related to modern science.Do lemmings actually jump off cliffs? (They don't.) Did we really go to the moon? (Of course.) Does chocolate give you zits? (Never has. Never will.) Did Einstein fail school? (Nope.)Dr. Karl has labeled this endless stream of questionable queries "Great Mythconceptions." Now, in his book of the same name, the good doctor seeks to set inquisitive minds straight on the most intriguing questions he's been asked.Does the soul weigh 21 grams?Can you apply a mathematical code to the Bible to predict future events?Do we really use only 10 percent of our brain?Does a duck's quack echo?Can mosquitoes really infect you with the AIDS virus?The funny facts and dizzying discoveries in "Great Mythconceptions" answer countless questions that have been asked for years. The book also features humorous black-and-white illustrations that reinforce each revelation. Each section concludes with bonus tidbits that delve deeper into related aspects of each question.

    Because let’s face it! We hoomans are obviously stupid and trust me unicorns are never wrong. Did you know? The horn of the unicorn symbolizes ultimate truth and it has the power to pierce the chest of anyone who tries to lie. Damn!‘Uuuuuuuunicornnnnnnnnnnnnn,’ I yawned, waking up, after being thrown back to our crap-shit called Earth.‘So fellow hoomans, let’s begin.’About the book:This book is a sarcastic and humorous take on various themes like love, life, humanity, healing, and heartbreak - expressed through 51 beautiful chapters of relatable quotes, musings and poems. It basically deals with what we humans go through on a day-to-day basis. Moreover, every chapter is accompanied by a unique and perfectly orchestrated author's rant or opinion focused on one single person; You.

    Can a computer think? Why is your consciousness like Bitcoin? Will there be an artificial intelligence apocalypse?

    It is a dive deep into the circles of emotion, empathy, acceptance, healing and insights into a different perspective towards life. In the voice of a budding adolescent, the book cascades into day-to day-shortcomings, carved into poetry and at the same time, embraces you in silence and stillness of thought. The book is an attempt to connect with the reader, to reflect upon them, unbiased and together and embrace a new beginning. With simplified use of grammar and vocabulary, this book seeks nothing but the companionship of all. With this debut book, the author aims to connect to one and to all in the message and purpose of existence, the aid of spirituality and an ode to a beautiful journey called life.

    Yet they lived by the green in the village of Stanford in the Vale, where everything you needed was within walking distance and the sound of motorcars was rarely heard. Then reaching her teens, Pam realised how few opportunities she had. At fifteen she started working for the civil service. Pam knew she had to reach out for more, and sought it first in the WRAF. But it was some time before she discovered the unique talent that would make her one of Britain's best-loved comics. Containing Pam's much-loved combination of humour and poignancy, The Necessary Aptitude is a beautifully written memoir of growing up in the country in post-war Berkshire.

    These poems are allusive and tough. While they celebrate the pleasures of the natural world--mutability, desire, and the flowering of things--they are compounded by a critical awareness of contemporary culture. As we traverse their associative leaps, we discover a linguistic landscape that is part garden, part wilderness, where a poem can perform its own natural history. Divided into four cantos interrupted by lyrics and errata, Meteoric Flowers mirrors the form of Erasmus Darwin's 18th-century scientific pastorals. In attending to poetry's investigative potential, Willis shifts our attention from product to process, from commodity to exchange, from inherited convention to improvisational use.

    

    What Michael doesn’t expect, is to be put in charge of a group of offenders and sent to a remote location in the Sierra Nevada Mountains in Spain to teach them survival skills as part of their rehabilitation programme. But Michael knows nothing at all about survival skills. He was sort of in the SAS, yes, but his shining record on the “Escape and Evasion” courses was more a testament to his computer skills than his ability to catch wildlife and barbecue it over an impromptu fire. Basically, he was the SAS’s techy nerd and only achieved that position as a result of a bet with a fellow hacker. Facing a stark choice between starvation or returning home to serve out their sentences, the group of offenders under Michael’s supervision soon realise that the only way to survive is to use their own unique set of skills – the kind of skills that got them arrested in the first place.

    At the perpetual age of 650, this is really no longer an option. The Full Moon Event Paulie Vergen is a Vampire living the daily grind of life until a fateful day when a newly infected Werewolf landed on his doorstep. All Paulie wanted was peace and quiet, but life didn't often seem to care about his plans. He's now faced with helping the poor Werewolf navigate through the Underworld in order to find the help that he needs. Bob the Zombie Bob is a Zombie who was just going about his business when a band of thieves stole his hand so that they could make a batch of Elfagra in the Upperworld. While it's bad enough that they've stolen Bob's hand for such a purpose, it comes to the Zombie's attention that if the bad guys use the wrong technique it could cause a cosmic rift that will spell the real death of Bob...not just the long, drawn out one that's part of being a Zombie. Gappy's Gadgets Gappy Whirligig is an industrious Gnome who has yet to reach the Age of Tinkering. In a flash, Gappy's life flips upside down, leaving him to make the decision to either strike out on his own or become a 42-year-old foster child. Gappy demonstrates his industrious spirit as he leaves Hubintegler's rules and regulations behind and instead seeks to make his mark in the seedy town of Planoontik.These stories get their influence from Terry Pratchett's Discworld, Robert Asprin's Myth Adventures, Monty Python, and countless other comedic mediums. This omnibus edition includes the first four books in the Tales from the Land of Ononokin series. You'll get wizards, vampires, werewolves, dwarves, elves, gnomes, orcs, ogres, giants, gorgans, humans, trolls, zombies, and more ... and it's all set in a fantastical world that will keep you giggling for weeks.

    

    But Bill, a Technical Fertilizer Operator from a planet of farmers, wasn't interested in honor-he was only interested in two things: his chosen career, and the shapely curves of Inga-Maria Calyphigia. Then a recruiting robot shanghaied him with knockout drops, and he came to in deep space, aboard the Empire warship Christine Keeler. And from there, things got even worse.