This book is written by a stand-up comedian that takes you through tragedy after tragedy on its path to hilarity. Will it make you laugh? Eventually. Will it make you cry? Probably. But the hope is that it will also make you smile, dream, and reflect, while simultaneously inspiring you to never stop chasing your dreams (even if your very own family is constantly trying to derail them). Brandt tells his life story with candor, detailing the many pit stops, wrong turns, crazy connections, and lucky breaks he experienced along the way to his comedy career, all while trying to balance a toxic relationship with his jailbird dad. Brandt's storytelling will make you laugh (it better because that's his job!) and believe, as he does, that when it comes to defining family, blood isn't always thicker than water.

     Sometimes society is wrong. Meet the best of the absolute worst-the perpetrators of the most wretched demonstrations of moral conduct ever:Super Snorer Terrible Baby Namer Hot Water User-Upper Express Checkout Cheater No-Umbrella Etiquette Lady Eight-Minute Voicemail Leaver Dude Who Takes Board Games Too SeriouslyPeople Who Deserve It exposes everyone and everything whose behavior, life choices, and sometimes odor leave humanity with only one painful option: a punch to the face.

    SABOTAGE. THEFT. PANTO. What's the connection between a scheming Russian oligarch and his bungling henchmen, an ardent eco-protester and a faded Hollywood bombshell? And why are they leaving crime scenes all over Scotland - from Largs to Orkney, Stornoway to the Borders? And what has any of this got to do with Cullen? He just wants to be bloody left alone. It’s a series of bizarre mishaps in a plot full of incident, humour and Scottish salmon. Oh no it isn’t! OH YES IT IS!

    We have the annual tree lighting in the town square, a snowman building competition, ice skating on Grosvenor’s Pond, and horse-drawn sleigh rides. You’re welcome to cut down your own Christmas tree at Gridley Meadows, or join in the caroling on the Common.Dickens offers an abundance of heartfelt wishes, a few much needed miracles, and—quite possibly—a touch of magic! Families reunite, new friends are made, and old flames take a second chance at happiness. All while celebrating this most joyful time of the year.Join us as our best selling and award winning authors fill your holiday stocking with ten brand new novellas ranging from sweet to sassy, including:Millie’s Awesome Holiday Miracle by Top 100 Author Nancy Fraser ~ She’s an overworked single mom struggling to make ends meet. He’s the handsome CEO who’s come to Dickens to save—or close—the toy factory. Can one precocious little girl bring a couple of much-needed miracles to the people she cares about most?Miracle At Holly Hill Inn by Top 100 Author Maddie James ~ Ariana is looking for the perfect Christmas village. Instead, she finds the town Scrooge. Will two days snowbound together at Holly Hill Inn bring them closer together, or send them each on their merry way?Holiday Hearts by Top 100 Author Caroline Clemmons ~ Laura Jordan’s beauty and sense of humor are more apparent than her sharp mind, soft heart, and strict code of right and wrong. Ward Callahan has avoided romantic complications to throw himself into building his ad agency. Once he meets Laura, he falls hard but must convince her that dating her boss is not inappropriate. Can he convince her he doesn’t want her heart only for the holidays, but forever?The Tinsel Tango by Best Selling Author Bonnie Edwards ~ Brenna needs some R&R over Christmas in Dickens. Tango lessons from mysterious Jett…Smith? may bring her everything her heart desires, but his secrets may kill the love they find.Wisdom of the Heart by USA Today Best Selling Author Liz Flaherty ~ They were best friends who fell in love, but that was high school. Life and families and other loves had happened since that dear and distant time. They're friends again, comfortable with each other and having so much fun at Christmas time in Dickens. They're not still in love, but...wait...could it be happening again?Operation Snowball by Best Selling Author Kathryn Hills ~ Returning to small town life is hard for Army veteran John Gridley. The last thing he expects to find is love with the beautiful widow, Heather Murphy. Can the perfect Christmas tree and a missing cat named Snowball bring them together despite meddling townsfolk?Angel Kisses and Holiday Wishes by Best Selling Author Peggy Jaeger ~ When Sage left town 18 years ago, she left Keith's heart in tatters. Now she's back, and he's wondering if they can put the past behind them and rekindle the love they lost.Holly’s Wish by Top 100 Author Kathleen Lawless ~ What if the girl who got away is actually standing right in front of you? Years earlier, Nico and Holly shared one magical Christmas Eve. She never stopped wishing he’d find where she left her number.When he does, is it too late?Holiday Heart Wishes by Award Winning Author Lucinda Race ~ On her way into Dickens to visit family, Vera picks up Tony, a stranded motorist. Rather than part ways when they arrive, they discover their loved ones are intent on getting married. Can they slow down the older couple's rush to the altar? Or, will holiday heart wishes come true for everyone?Santa’s Wish by Best Selling Author Jan Scarbrough ~ Will Christmas magic help them overcome Roz’s career ambitions and Cooper’s grief, and bring them together for a second chance at love?

    It’s a loneliness she nurtures, finds comfort in even, except at Christmas, a time of dread.Then comes an invite, an offer from an old friend, to join him for ‘The Damned Season’ at his house on an island off the coast of Anglesey, for Christmas with a difference. Intrigued as well as desperate, Beth accepts, arriving there a few days before Christmas Eve.She’s not the only one invited, however, there are four others, all strangers to each other, all crossing murky, choppy waters to meet their host, a much changed man that seems not only surprised to see them, but dismayed, and weary too. Who is nothing but a husk.With the boatman gone and the mists closing in, Beth finds herself in a solitary house of ever-changing rooms and never-ending corridors, of people disappearing and then reappearing, of feasts and famine. And then there are the doors, constantly multiplying, and locked…aren’t they?The Damned Season. It’s coming.

    In the midst of the annual Christmas festival, an accident forces her to return and manage her mom’s candy business at the Sugar Shop.Grant hasn’t seen her since she left for college, but remembers spending summers at the lake with the skinny, plain girl he and everyone used to know as Sugar. The contemporary advertising executive he encounters now is anything but plain.Will Grant’s kindness, the charm of Silver Falls, and the caring community open Sugar’s heart to all she’s been missing?The best-selling author of A Season for Hope, the tale readers describe as the perfect Christmas story, delivers a touching sequel with the second in her Christmas in Silver Falls series in this new festive novella that pairs perfectly with a cup of cocoa in front of a blazing fire.

    His Christmas plans include starting a foundation to help kids get out of his old neighborhood. However, quarterback Will Kent throws a wrench in Evan's plans with a bet. A bet for Evan to contact his first love, Anna Jordan, and try to win her back. To his surprise, Anna—now the hottest actress in Hollywood—agrees to help him with his foundation. Anna brings her feisty, ninja-like bodyguard along, and suddenly Evan has a problem. The beautiful and tough, Henley Keaton only wants a drama-free Christmas. When Evan Cook calls Henley's employer, to Milwaukee to help with some foundation, she's overjoyed. She can avoid the yearly family fight and eat deep-fried-cheese-curds and relax for Christmas. But when Anna gets sick and forces Henley to go on a date with Evan Cook in her place, Henley’s plan begins to crumble. When Henley and Evan engage in a spirited duel of Shakespeare quotes, things get...complicated. After tragedy strikes, and it looks like Evan's haunted past is going to catch up with him, he must decide if he's willing to walk away or let Christmas miracles come true.

    And it is Modi-led India that has this high honour. Prime Minister Modi rolls out the red carpet for the aliens. He receives them at the airport, shows them the sights in Delhi and convinces them to invest in the Make in India campaign. The leader of the alien delegation even holds a broom to promote Swachh Bharat. But what is the real reason the aliens have come to India? Are they friends? Or will they turn foes? Read this hilarious, rib-tickling novel from the author of Unreal Elections to find out.

    

    But no one saw past her body and while she was growing up she was taunted with the name “plump plum.” She learned to accept her figure and was happy in her own skin. She considered herself fabulous and curvaceous even if no one else could see her beauty she sure as hell could. Mr. Right would come along when he was good and ready, till then she wouldn’t settle for “you’re pretty but if you weren’t so big…” hell no. Christmas came around and her little flower shop was selling poinsettias and holiday bouquets faster than she could make them. Mr. Hollis Wright came into the store with a rush order for a holiday party and showed more interest in her than her flowers. She accepted his dinner date and from the first kiss sparks flew. One minute he was buying arrangements for a party, the next he was dating the sweetest plum in New York City. Hollis didn’t care about her size or gossip. When he kissed Portia made him feel more alive than he felt in a long time. To him she was the most beautiful woman in the world. That doesn’t mean people didn’t talk when the dashing eligible bachelor showed up with her on his arm. From a size two to sixteen, one headline read and it faze him, it was his life and he lived it on his terms. The only thing that mattered to Hollis was the size of her love. While she thought that a holiday fling, Hollis was going to show her he had something more permanent in mind.

    Like an overstuffed stocking on Christmas morning, NPR Holiday Favorites is full of unexpected pleasures and evergreen delights.• David Sedaris contributes his now classic “Santaland Diaries,” his account of his experiences playing Santa’s little helper at Macy’s in New York.• Susan Stamberg sneaks her mother-in-law’s recipe for cranberry relish onto the air—again.• Storyteller Kevin Kling finds an invitation to participate in a production of The Nutcracker too tempting to resist.• Ghanian-born commentator Meri Danquah shares her thoughts on Kwanzaa.• Cowboy poet Baxter Black describes a Christmas cookie with “the denseness of an anvil and the half-life of a radial tire.”• Robert Siegel goes in search of the correct spelling for December’s Jewish holiday.• The Thanksgiving tables are turned on unsuspecting Bostonians in “When Turkeys Attack.”And more...

    Open at your own risk. Sarah and Tommy have the same kinds of problems as most any ten-year-old girl and six-year-old boy. Homework, bullies, Dad not going in to work since Mom ran off to fuck the postman. That sort of thing. But they're not going to take their problems lying down. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, they think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley. What they discover will make you soil your pants in terror. It will make your skin crawl. It might even give you... Shingles.

    Her lonely boss who hates Christmas. As they rediscover the magic of the holiday, will they also find love?  Christmas hasn't been the same for Allison Voss since losing her husband, but she's determined to make it merry for her daughters' sake. She's between jobs and simply managing day to day is a struggle until she meets Ward Haysgard. His act of kindness and offer of employment just might turn her luck around.Ward is not a fan of Christmas. As a district manager for a large department store, he's seen plenty of greed and selfishness and not much good will toward men. But Allison's plight touches him. As he gets to know her and her girls, they work their way into his heart. A heart he thought had hardened long ago, when he lost the loving grandmother who raised him.As the holiday approaches, an old secret from Ward's past emerges and threatens his closeness to Allison. Will he leave her heartbroken? Or will she and Ward discover together what makes Christmas real? Read all the stories in the Holidays in Applewood series by Christie Logan: A Real Christmas (Holidays in Applewood 1)Dear Acquaintance (Holidays in Applewood 2)A Gentle Heart (Holidays in Applewood 3)

     Meet Wally Moscowitz. His day job is top secret. As ghostwriter for Oral B, the most famous gangsta rapper in the world, Wally is the real mastermind behind Godz-Illa Records' best-selling artist, and the best-kept secret in the Industry. But if word gets out about Wally's true profession, Godz-Illa's kajillion-dollar rap empire will be sunk, and Wally will be dead meat. When Wally comes home one particularly bizarre afternoon to find a ransom note and his best friend and dog, Dr. Barry Schwartzman, missing, Wally goes to great lengths to stop the dognappers while keeping the big secret under wraps. He must, if he wants to walk away with his job, not to mention his life, intact. The hunt for Dr. Schwartzman and the blackmailing thug who is trying to reveal hip-hop's biggest conspiracy becomes a wild-goose chase in which everyone becomes a suspect: Sue Schadenfreude, Wally's girlfriend, who makes a pretty penny massaging Barbra Streisand's papillon, Yenta; Pardeep Vishvatma, Wally's neighbor, who keeps a watchful eye on all the suspicious characters lurking about the hood; Jerry Silver, Wally's slick-rick, self-styled superagent; Abraham "Dandy" Lyons, Wally's boss and Godz-Illa's CEO-badass with Suge Knight's street cred and Tony Soprano's "friends"; Jem, the fiery, achingly familiar vixen who steals Wally's heart; Yo Yo Pa and Teddy Bizzle, Oral B's entourage; and the mysterious mob crew: Five-two Lou, Six-seven Kevin, and Balsamic Vinny, who show up when Wally needs them most. Duck Duck Wally is a hilarious romp through the absurdities of Los Angeles, the bombastic details of hip-hop culture, and a day in the life of what was supposed to be the painfully ordinary existence of Wally Moscowitz.

    Flames of Chaos spread, swallowing up all they can with horrific hunger, bringing pain and madness to all they cross. Across the ocean, the lands have long since begun to die. The Empire of mankind struggles to maintain against the pressing weight of drought, famine, and the long-standing dangers of the Eastern Mountains, where ancient Dwarven [Constructs] and monsters roam. The people whisper of a coming doom, and some say even the Emperor's own Seers claim the end has begun... But none of these things have anything to do with a Tiny Snake. Not in the slightest. ------ From the online web-serial, comes a story of reincarnation, comedy, and the winding path towards existential redemption: All Hail The Tiny Snake God!