Here is the plan. The plan is illustrated. The plan is quite complicated. But not too complicated. I think you will be thrilled by it. I am certain you will be thrilled by it.No need to read massive volumes or use the internetJUST READ THISONLY THIS

    Looking for Something New and Really Funny? Imagine you can get it with JUST ONE CLICK! Yes, this is a JOKE BOOK of your dreams. Vol.1 of the Donald's Humor Factory series. This super funny adult joke book is free of swear words. Donald Shaw is a popular comic and an award-winning humor books author (his wife gave him a French kiss award)! His jokes are loved by thousands of people from Alaska to Zimbabwe, and possibly outside of Earth. Joking is always fun! Jokes bring smiles to people’s faces. Jokes make us laugh. People fall in love when they smile at each other. We love joking in the company of our best friends and families. Jokes help us to relax and overcome any difficulties. Joking is an awesome social skill and a great way to make new friends and to communicate nearly in any surrounding. Many people also love just to read some good jokes for amusement. However, it is not that easy to find real good jokes today. Some of them are simply out-of-date. Some of them are not clean enough. You may also find many joke books that are not really funny and contain too much fluff and advertising. This jokes book is different! Buying this humor book you will get: A great collection of 300 FUNNY JOKES One-liners, real-life awkward situations, and hilarious short stories Great book to read on a long trip Clean and dirty jokes WITHOUT nasty words Jokes for adults and teenagers Jokes about relationship, marriage, bar, professions, hobbies, etc. LIMITED TIME BONUS: the link to download my FREE HUMOR LIBRARY that includes hundreds of great jokes for kids, adults, and teenagers. So the whole family may have fun! This is no-brainer, really! This book is free of racism. I support LGBT community, because love is love. I love all people in the world and I want to make you laugh and smile! This is my ultimate goal and I did not mean to insult anyone. So relax, take it easy and enjoy this humor book! Buy this funny book NOW and roll on the floor laughing! Pick up your copy today by clicking the BUY NOW button at the top of this page!

    In this book I have set out prove that statement is completely untrue and in fact with customers like these then maybe the opposite could be said. So sit back, grab your self a drink perhaps an alcoholic one if you feel that way inclined and enjoy some of the strangest, ridiculous and most outrageous complaints and statements from all walks of life. The second volume is out now and is much longer and in my opinion even better than the first, though i would say that.

    On a cruise ship - Please do not lean on the widow. In a hotel - A sports jacket may be worn to dinner, but not trousers. In a London department store - Bargain basement upstairs.

    Simon's self-sufficient rural life is an inspiration to us all' - Ben Fogle Following a drunken misunderstanding Simon Dawson gave up his job in the city, moved to the wilds of Exmoor and became an accidental self-sufficient smallholder with an array of animals. But that was years ago now. Following up on his first book, PIGS IN CLOVER, this is the story of what happens when he suddenly realises that his life is changing all over again. He's not quite the spring chicken that he used to be: he is, horror of horrors, getting older.With a cast of best friends (some more helpful than others) including Ziggy, a panicked soon-to-be father desperate to grow up, Garth, an annoying teenager, and a rather handsome pig called The General, a plan is hatched to help each other mature (or immature). Heartfelt discoveries and hilarious endeavours ensue as they work through their age-related angsts, all with a fair dose of pigs, chickens, lambs and animal madness along the way. This is Exmoor's uplifting laugh-out-loud antidote to middle age in the mud; a place where you truly realise that the sty's the limit!

    This Hockey Dad, Bob McKenzie, is not afraid to look into the mirror and candidly assess and reveal his own strengths and weaknesses. He has anecdotes that will make you laugh, stories that will bring a tear to your eye, and insights into this minor hockey world that can only come from having lived through the highs and the lows and everything in between with two boys who grew up in an environment where minor hockey was their epicenter. Michael is now a 22-year-old entering his junior year playing NCAA hockey on scholarship, one step away from the professional ranks. Shawn, now 19, had his competitive minor hockey life cut drastically short at age 14 because of complications from multiple concussions. While Michael has attempted to, and continues to try to, scale the heights within hockey, Shawn has, at times, had to navigate the depths. Their deeply personal stories, and how their father dealt with them (sometimes well, sometimes not so well), are a compelling look into the world of minor hockey--a major Canadian passion. From hysterically funny anecdotes, to debates on numerous hockey issues, praise and criticism for the system, and personal reflections on the game, this book is an insightful, irreverent, and moving look at a slice of hockey culture that is not so much a recreation as it is a way of life.

    As soon as they drive across Andalusia, they fall in love with its rugged beauty, whitewashed villages, red geraniums, giant aloes, and endless olive trees. After weeks of visiting ruins and dilapidated sheds advertised as homes, they find a little stone cottage in a mountain valley in the middle of nowhere. Equipped with everything that a romantic soul desires: a patio shaded by grape vines, an ancient bay leaf tree, and a formidable oak in front of a long driveway, they fall in love with this property and decide to reform it into a guest house. With little foresight or planning, they exchange cushy expats lives for a life in the sun.Quite quickly, however, they find themselves battling cowboy builders, no electricity, a dry well, torrential rain storms, and a freezing cold winter without a roof over their heads. Through all these adventures, they develop relations with their neighbours who had lived in the valley for many generations. Puzzled by the strangers’ behaviour, the neighbours teach them about olive picking, and the cultivation of local vegetables. But primarily, they offer their endless generosity and insight into life in rural Andalusia.As they begin to settle in, financial problems confront our somewhat naïve couple. Without steady pay checks and construction bills piling up, their idea of the good life starts to fall apart. Written with a wry sense of honest humour, this story is filled with twists and turns that take the reader on a journey from a life where every day was monotonously repetitive to a place where every day presents a new challenge.

    He's kind to animals, loves children and helps old ladies across the street. But when he gets a pencil in his hands, he becomes a menace. No subject is too taboo. From dead kittens, to Helen Keller, to organized religion, there's no subject he won't twist. Politically correct? Dan Collins doesn't know the meaning.You've never seen cartoons like this before. This definitely isn't the Sunday funnies. Hilarious, demented and guaranteed to have you clutching your navel between gasps for air. Once you get hold of this book, you'll be convinced that this guy needs serious help before he's doomed to an eternity in hell.Check out this collection of insane cartoons and see if you're as demented as Dan Collins. If you find yourself laughing hysterically at some of the most marvelously bent cartoons ever created, plan on joining him on his decent into the inferno.From an early age Dan was heavily influenced by revolutionary comic artists such as Robert Crumb, B. Kliban, Gahan Wilson and Sam Gross. Coming from small town Ohio to Ohio State University in the early, turbulent 70's was a cultural and political awakening for him that would have a lasting impact. The Vietnam War and the counter culture revolution were the back drop from which this small town choirboy 'innocent' would pen his creations. What emerged were some of the most off the wall cartoons ever drawn.

    Like the bungling burglar who logged on to his own Facebook page at his victim's house - and forgot to turn the computer off when he left, or the stupid bank robber who made his escape in his own car - complete with personalised number plates, or the idiotic criminal who tried to hand himself into the police... in order to collect the reward. Award-winning writer Andrew Penman has scoured the country for this hilarious collection of those who are not just bad, but also dim very dim. 'Andrew Penman enjoys a laugh at the expense of Britain's most stupid burglars' - The Mirror 'Exploits so dim-witted it's surprising they ever managed to keep themselves breathing long enough to commit any crime' - Wales Online Illustrated with cartoons drawn by Neil Kerber.

    But alas! He has no money to do so! Will Deepu end up disappointing his brother? Find out in The Fancy Dress.• Suppandi’s employer rewards him for his honesty when he returns the five rupee note he found. But what will happen when Suppandi continues this honest behaviors? Get ready to laugh with The Adventures of Suppandi: Self Help.• Being around people who love to boast about themselves can be annoying. But what do you do when you’re forced to travel with one of them? Find out what a man does when he is repeatedly slighted by the Proud Man in the Train.• Hodja’s friend just wants some peace and quiet to meditate. But the fascinated villagers won’t let him be! What clever scheme will Hodja come up with to help his friend in Money Power?

    In a crowded restaurant a small boy watches fearfully as his Jewish father is arrested by HitlerOCOs Gestapo. Days later, as Nazis burn and loot Jewish shops, his resourceful Catholic mother prepares an escape plan to take her family to England. So began Andreas Siegfried SachsOCO life in London, a new life at times no less bizarre or madcap than the world of Fawlty Towers and its hapless Spanish waiter, Manuel. Now, as one of BritainOCOs best-loved actors, Andrew Sachs recounts tales of his hilarious struggle to come to terms with all things English and his early foray into the world of showbiz, and goes behind the scenes of the infamous Torquay hotel. In time conquering stage, screen and radio, Sachs has appeared alongside a galaxy of stars including Rex Harrison, Norman Wisdom, No1/2l Coward, Alec Guinness, Richard Burton and Peter Sellers, and written award-winning radio plays, proving his talent and versatility again and again. A charming, laugh-out-loud funny and utterly compelling memoir which promises to delight devotees of Fawlty Towers, I Know Nothing! reveals the twists and turns of the truly fascinating life of Andrew Sachs, whose dignified response to the distressing intrusion into his private life by Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross has only served to enhance the British publicOCOs affection for him. "

    We all know one! They like to groan and grumble, offering their own commentary on the shortcomings of modern life. Whether it is queues at the supermarket, the state of the health system, the price of a pint these days, the hairstyles of teenagers, or the number of Maltesers you actually get in a bag, there is always something that will get their goat. 'The Grumpy Old Git's Guide to Life' is a hilarious celebration of all these grumps, how to identify one, what exactly they find so irritating and why we find their rants quite so amusing.

    With an ever increasing fan base, an expanding number of publications who regularly feature his work, one of the most popular and most visited web-logs (www.thismodernworld.com), the time is now for The Great Big Book of Tomorrow. This massive collection of Tomorrow's greatest hits, unseen gems and obscurities, new material and color section is the so far definitive collection of one of the most popular 'underground' cartoonists ever--a delight to long-time fans and new readers alike.

    Like a bizarro-world Norman Rockwell, he created magazine covers of Frankenstein, the Creature from the Black Lagoon. the Phantom of the Opera, and countless others in horrifying yet dazzling images throughout the 1960s and '70s. His intense colour and bold, impressionistic brushwork gave a unique sense of drama and sophistication to these iconic characters. Today, collectors fight over his original art--but, with this book, every fan can own glowing full-colour reproductions of his most famous work as well as many previously unpublished paintings and drawings.

    In a career spanning forty years, Barry has worked alongside the greatest producers and performers in show business: Tommy Cooper, Humphrey Lyttelton, Morecambe and Wise, Willie Rushton, Peter Cook, Kenny Everett, Rory Bremner to name but a few - this book is a veritable Who's Who of comedy.From humble beginnings at the Windmill Theatre and Expresso Bongo, to The Frost Report, Call My Bluff and I'm Sorry I haven't a Clue, Barry recalls the good, the bad, and the downright ugly in his own inimitable style.'Barry Cryer ...an anecdote jukebox whose whole life is basically one big chatshow.'Guardian